Version 3.0

MOTHER 2

(EarthBound)

Giygas Strikes Back

(Please see my website for more translations!)

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Chapter 1 – A New Adventure Begins

One summer night, just around midnight…

On crumpled sheets that were covered in sweat, a young boy was fitfully tossing and turning over and over again.

It was awfully hard for him to sleep that night. When he turned to the right he felt restless, and when he rolled to the left he still couldn't get comfortable. In a listless state somewhere between being awake and being in a deep sleep, his heavy eyelids were half-open as he stared vacantly out through the open window.

And then...even though there was no breeze, the curtains began to billow gently. Right at that moment, a tiny speck of light suddenly appeared in that starry sky, and it seemed to be growing larger before his very eyes. From the size of a pinpoint, to the size of a grain of rice, to the size of a bean, to the size of a ping-pong ball, the dazzling light glittered steadily, shooting out vibrant flares as it headed straight for him! This blazing orb of fire was a fast ball shooting right across home plate…!

“Whooooaaaa!”

The competitive instincts of this baseball-loving boy took over in an instant. Putting on his helmet, he gripped his bat, set his stance, and gave it his best shot. Yes! Contact!

Craackk! A perfect home run! What an incredible impact!

“Big bro! Big bro, snap out of it!”

When he came to his senses, the young boy, Ness, realized he was lying on the floor of his room. His precocious little sister Tracy was slapping him lightly on his cheeks. Apparently, he had fallen out of bed.

I was sure I hit it, though!...he thought, but he wasn't even holding the bat in his hand.

“I guess it was...a dream,” he said. “I guess I was half-asleep.”

“It wasn't a dream,” said Tracy, in the same casual manner as always. “There was a really loud noise. It came from the mountain behind the house, like something really big fell there. It's too late for any planes to be flying now, so I'm sure it was a meteorite. Look, over there. It's still all lit up!”

Outside the window, near the top of the mountain, he could see something that looked a lot like what had happened when he had once accidentally set some plastic on fire–oddly-colored flames, leaping wildly. The night sky was ablaze with an unearthly glow!

“...Let's go see it, Tracy!” Ness cried.

“No way!” Tracy replied, as she put her hands to her cheeks. “We can't do that! That thing's definitely radioactive. Or maybe it's carrying some strange virus, or some nasty alien hitched a ride on it or something...besides, big bro, playing around at night is the first step toward delinquency. It was written plainly on our print-outs of summer vacation tips and pointers–we must never wander around past seven at night without being accompanied by a parent or guardian, or else we'll end up getting hauled away by the police!”

“I guess that's true, but,” Ness began, shaking his head, and just as he did...

BANGBANGBANG-BANG! ...There was a sound of violent knocking that seemed to shake the entire house. Ness and Tracy exchanged glances, then bolted down the stairs in a hurry.

Their mother was wide awake now, too, and attempting to hold her pink nightgown closed over her ample bosom. Her head was covered in hair curlers.

At her feet was King, their Old English Sheepdog, flopped onto the floor in a truly listless way and looking very much like an old feather-duster. Although he still had such a majestic name as “King”, he weighed an oafish one hundred and twenty-seven pounds, and was quite old, at around fifteen years. His fifteen dog-years were about sixty, for a human. There was a time when he had been young and fit, but for as long as Ness had known him, King had always been a huge, lazy old dog. A typical dog, upon hearing suspicious knocking in the middle of the night, would probably have been barking their head off.

BANG-BANGBANG-BANG! Meanwhile, that knocking was becoming louder and more insistent.

“Maybe it's the police,” said Tracy. “Oh, what will we do?! I bet they're here to tell us that the Martians have come to attack the earth!”

“Well, whether it's the police or Martians,” said their mother, with a sigh, “I don't want them to see me without my makeup on. As it stands, I have a reputation for looking so outstandingly young that I could pass for Ness's older sister rather than his mother. Ahh...it's at times like these that I wish your father was here...”

Their father played a role in the food service industry, and had gone on a long-term business trip to a certain economic superpower. Incidentally, Ness's father's company was known as Ness Burger.

Ever since he was a baby, Ness had always loved hamburgers. Ness's mother had made a living as a supermodel when she was younger and had been very busy, so the daily kitchen duties became the responsibility of Ness's father, who at that time was a brilliant businessman for Mr. Minch's supermarkets. His father was a bit of a perfectionist, and guided by Ness's acute palate and pickiness, he did his absolute best, through storm and stress, to create the world's most delicious burger. Before too long, he had perfected the most supreme, ultimate hamburger, according to Ness's tastes, which was a huge hit at their local bazaar. Using stocks of meat he'd bought up from Mr. Minch's, he founded Ness Burger. As their number of restaurants expanded in leaps and bounds, there was soon talk of opening branches in other countries, too, and so......er...well, now might not be the time for such idle talk.

BANG-BANG-A-BANG-BANG-A-BANG! BANG-BANGITTY-BANGITTY-BANG!

That knocking sound was getting funkier, more avant-garde, and also more annoying. Clearly, until the door was answered, whoever stood before it had no plans to stop.

“...I'll get it,” said Ness.

Properly buttoning the top of his pajamas, he went over to the front door.

“Who is it?” he asked.

“Open up, Ness! It's me, it's me!”

There came a voice that sounded a lot like the squealing of a cornered pig. It was Pokey, Mr. Minch's eldest son. BANG-BANG, BANG-BANG, the knocking continued.

“This is awful, this is terrible, this is serious! Open up, c'mon, open up, hey, Ness! Open the door quick, or I'll kill you!”

Ness felt an intense annoyance from the very depths of his heart.

Pokey Minch was the most hated kid at their school. He was violent, he was vulgar, and he was terribly bossy. He interrupted their classes almost every single day with his foolish, childish pranks. He constantly teased and tormented Eddy, who had asthma, Mike, who was very scrawny, Bill, who had a habit of stumbling over his words when he was in a hurry to speak, and so many others. Every now and then he'd be called in to the principal's office to be reprimanded, but it was impossible for even the adults to make Pokey reflect upon his behavior. For you see...

...Pokey's father was Mr. Minch, the most revered man in the whole town.

The small and simple town of Onett was known across the whole country thanks to Mr. Minch's chain of supermarkets. Well, truthfully, it was also thanks to that super-delicious Ness Burger, the hamburger that made it impossible to ever eat any other burger again once you've tried one, but...oh right, as I had mentioned earlier, some time ago, Ness's father had been working for Mr. Minch. When Ness Burger was founded, Mr. Minch had given Ness's father a loan, under the pretense of kindness...and quite forcibly.

Mr. Minch, that sly old fox of a businessman, put together a contract using all of his crooked insight and trickery, and Ness's kind-hearted and trusting father wound up unintentionally entrapping himself. In the end, although he worked harder and harder, the majority of his profits were siphoned directly to Mr. Minch. And it wasn't only money that he claimed for his own, but it was reputation, as well. Mr. Minch would loudly and clearly proclaim that the reason the burgers at Ness Burger were so delicious was because of a special contract the Minch supermarket chain had with farms that provided meat of an exceptional quality. Huge advertisements for Minch Market were printed on all of the wrappers at Ness Burger. According to that contract, only Mr. Minch had any say in things like management and advertising.

And very recently, he had sent Ness's father overseas. This was because no matter how much he was threatened or cajoled, his father refused to reveal the crucial part of his hamburger recipe–his secret spice formula–and this had thoroughly angered Mr. Minch.

Lately, there seemed to be hushed whispers in Onett and throughout other regions of Eagleland that Ness Burger, while still more incredibly delicious than any other hamburger out there, was somehow not quite as delicious as it had been in the past. It appeared as though Mr. Minch had begun using lower-quality meat. Perhaps he had been waiting for this opportunity, a time when Ness's father would be away. It seemed that his plan was to knock the restaurant's fine reputation down a bit, causing Ness's father to become discouraged. Then the chain could easily be taken over, renamed “Pokey Burger”, and from there, sales could be restored to their former glory.

Papa's precious hamburger...the hamburger named after Ness himself...the amazing Ness Burger, admired and beloved the whole world over–it appeared that Mr. Minch was trying to steal it all away from them!

And so...despite being neighbors for quite some time, and despite having once been childhood friends, the fact that Ness didn't really like that porky Pokey very much at all anymore...that's pretty understandable, isn't it?

But...

No matter how much he disliked this former friend, he had come all the way out here at this time of night...and he seemed to be in a great deal of trouble. Ness didn't want to give in to the threats, but he couldn't just ignore Pokey, either.

“Just what the heck is going on?” he said, as he opened the door, and the very round and very sweaty Pokey tumbled into the house.

“A meteorite...a meteorite fell, but you probably already knew tha–UUWAAGH!”

Suddenly King sprang to his feet, barking and looking very menacing. Even the easy-going King had no patience at all for Pokey. He kept his eyes locked onto this intolerable sworn enemy, ready to strike at any moment. With a furious expression on his face, King chased him all around the room, intent on biting his chubby backside.

“C-cut it out! Stop it! Hey, hey Ness, call off your stupid dog!” Pokey cried.

“King!”

When Ness called to him, King stopped in his tracks.

“Be a good boy, settle down,” said Ness, as he walked to the other side of the room and opened the door. “Go on, into the bedroom.” Shooting Pokey one last extremely frustrated glance, King gave in and headed for the back of the house, brushing his furry body against Ness's legs as he went.

“Phew, what a relief,” Pokey sighed. “What's wrong with that idiot dog? I've got drool all over me now. ...Are you guys feeding him enough?”

Far from showing Ness any gratitude for the rescue, Pokey's over-sized attitude had returned now that the dog who wasn't quite so fond of him was out of sight.

“Oh?” Ness replied, pretending he hadn't heard that right. “So why are you here, anyway?”

“Oh!” said Pokey. “Oh, right, right. Like I said, the meteorite, the meteorite! It's at the top of the mountain out back!”

“Ah, yeah,” said Ness. “The thing that's glowing, right?”

“Well, we were on the mountain earlier,” Pokey went on. “Today my dad and my mom went into town, so I took Picky up the mountain road in my dad's new Ferrari to practice drifting.”

“Pokey...you drove a car?!” Ness cried, in disbelief.

Pokey was two years older than Ness (and yet, because of his poor test scores, they were now in the same grade), but he was still only fourteen. He didn't have a license or anything like that, of course. By the way, the adorable Picky is Pokey's younger brother, who is a close friend of Tracy's.

“Heh-hehehe, it's really easy,” said Pokey, as he rubbed his red nose and grinned proudly. The idea that you can do bad things all you like, as long as you don't get caught, was probably something he had learned from his father. “My double-clutch technique is lightning fast! And on a mountain road like that, especially at night, there's a good chance no one will ever catch you. I was cruising along pretty smoothly, but then that meteorite suddenly caused all kinds of chaos. All at once there were cops everywhere, putting up some of Onett's famous roadblocks. I got out of that car in a hurry and found a place to hide.”

If he were to be caught driving so recklessly without a license, they'd never give him one, even after he'd turned the legal driving age.

“Anyway,” Pokey continued, “I made it all the way back to the house before I realized that idiot Picky was nowhere to be found. He got lost, I guess. Or...what if he was caught by the cops? ...Dammit, what if he's already blown it and told them I was driving? ...And if dad gets home and realizes the car's gone, he's gonna be really mad. I'm gonna get a hundred spankings. ...And so...Ness, hey!” In the dark, Pokey's eyes had a strange green glow to them, like a cat's. “You'll help me out, right? You're my buddy, aren't you? Let's go find Picky together. And we can tell them you were the one who drove out there!”

Ness's mouth hung wide open. “...You want me to say what...?”

“Hup!” Pokey lifted one sausage-like finger into the air and waggled it back and forth in a “tsk-tsk-tsk” motion. “Just as cool and chivalrous as always, Ness! I just knew you'd say yes.”

“Wait, Pokey, I–”

“...After all, there are packs of vicious stray dogs out there roaming that mountain,” Pokey interrupted. “I know you're not so cruel a man that you'd send me, your old friend, out there all alone. ...Ohh, poor, helpless Picky is probably crying his little heart out. Oh, I really hope the dogs haven't eaten him already!”

Ness clenched his fist.

He knew very well that Pokey was an expert at talking people into doing things for him, but he was also worried about the innocent Picky. No matter what...he was out there on that mountain, all alone, up against the police, stray dogs, and possibly even aliens from another planet!

“...I'll go get changed,” Ness said at last.

His mother and Tracy were waiting on the second floor landing, with worried looks on their faces.

“We heard everything,” said his mother. “That awful brat is really, truly revolting.”

“Be careful big bro!” said Tracy. “Bring Picky back safe, okay?”

Ness put on a shirt and pants, then pulled his favorite red baseball cap down over his brow. All set!

Mount Onett was just north of the town. It was a somewhat small, rocky mountain, and its slope was fairly gentle. In the winter, all the kids went sledding there. At its summit there was an observation deck, and long ago a hot-blooded teenage biker gang had often held their rallies up there. The strongest evidence of this was all the artwork and graffiti they had spray-painted onto the concrete of the observation deck–things like “TAKE THE LEAD”, “BANG BANG”, “I L❤ve Yoko”, and a scrawled doodle of two people sharing an umbrella.

It was rumored that those former biker gang members had all ended up joining the Onett police force. There was also a rumor that Captain Strong, who was so quick to lose his temper, had been the gang's leader. That was why the old graffiti had never been cleaned up, and that was also why roadblocks were always being put up for very trivial reasons, as Captain Strong gleefully attempted to challenge the Guinness Book of Records and “TAKE THE LEAD” in nostalgic races with his patrol car. ...But, well, of course, those were only rumors.

Now then...

Ness and Pokey nervously climbed up that mountain road, where the tree branches grew together so thickly on either side that it looked more like a tunnel of green. The sky was bright and full of stars that night, but all the places that were covered by the shadowy trees were pitch-dark, and the gravel at their feet was very slippery. It was truly crazy to think that Pokey had driven his father's Ferrari up a road like this.

Just around the corner on that gently sloping road was the office-slash-residence of Lier X. Agerate, a billboard-maker who specialized in false advertising. There were no houses beyond that.

When Ness turned to look back, the lights of the town were glittering faintly, like a dropped brooch that had settled at the bottom of a pond. Suddenly, it all seemed so very far away, and he became slightly afraid.

“Where do you think you might have lost him?” he asked, in a small voice.

“Higher up,” said Pokey, as he jerked his chin forward, arrogantly. “I'm pretty sure we left that 285 GTB just up ahead somewhere. ...Hey, there it is! C'mon, let's go!”

They crept forward, trying to muffle their footsteps and flattening themselves down in the shadows of the greenery. Soon they could see flashing red and blue lights just beyond a cluster of trees. There was a police officer standing beside a patrol car, talking into a radio.

“Dammit,” said Pokey. “This is bad. I think he's writing up a parking ticket.”

“It doesn't look like Picky is with him, though,” said Ness.

“Hey, Ness. You should go over there. Go on, and apologize to the policeman.”

“Why me?”

“Ahh...” Pokey smiled coolly, his face unusually pale for a boy. “...Because while they're busy hauling you away, that'll give me time to bring the car back. And once he hears the powerful roar of that Ferrari engine, that coward Picky will hurry up and come out of hiding, too.”

What a selfish thing to say! Ness was stunned into silence, and Pokey's pudgy face, at first somewhat surprised, warped into a somehow even nastier grin.

“Hey, hey now, are you alright, Ness?” he said. “It kinda looks like you're trying to defy me. If you make me angry, it's all over for your family, you know. That whole house...it belongs to me.”

“What are you talking about?” asked Ness.

“Like someone with a bad case of financial constipation, your stupid father hasn’t paid the interest on that loan this month,” Pokey replied. “Since that house was put up as collateral, the ownership will be transferred to my father. But my dad has no need for a run-down old house like that, so he's going to give it to me. So in other words, believe it or not, I'm your landlord now, aaah-hahahahaha!”

“Is someone there?”

The policeman turned his flashlight on them and Pokey covered his mouth in a panic, but his twisted little eyes still sparkled arrogantly. Holding back an intense desire to haul off and punch him as hard as he could, Ness's heart darkened as if it were being covered in gluey tar.

What if they were kicked out of their house?! If it were only him, Ness could sleep in the treehouse, or, if it came down to it, he could set up a tent on the school playground and adopt a camping lifestyle. But his mama and Tracy...if they had to go without their clean beds and their shower, or their wonderful built-in kitchen, they'd cry so very, very much.

Ohh, papa...papa, what are you doing out there? Ness thought. I wish you would come home soon...

Ness was still only twelve years old, and he wasn't able to protect his family. He didn't have enough strength to punish that awful Pokey, and make it so he'd never act so cocky again.

The policeman was coming toward them now, swinging his flashlight as he walked. He appeared to be large and very tall. The crunch of his footsteps on the gravel sounded a lot like the Jaws theme as he approached, steadily. Ness and Pokey hid themselves in the grass, flattening themselves as low as they possibly could, and held their breath.

Ness truly did not want to be caught hiding in a place like this with Pokey. What if they thought he was one of Pokey's underlings? Oh, but, wouldn't that be the truth...? As terrible as it was to think about, if he was doing all the things Pokey told him to...he really was his underling, wasn't he?

Mortified...frustrated...Ness tightly clenched his little fist.

And then...

Beep-beep, crackle-crackle! A radio started going off. Flustered, the policeman whirled around and returned to his patrol car.

“...Yeah, Callahan here,” said the policeman, into the radio. “...Huh, The Sharks? Causing a scene at the arcade? Man, those brats are nothing but trouble. ...Understood. I'm on my way.”

An obnoxious siren wailed as the patrol car headed back toward the town.

“Oh man, oh man, that was close, we're so lucky!” said Pokey. He opened the door of the Ferrari and barked a few haughty demands. “Ness! You find Picky, and bring him back home! ...And do it fast!”

Vrrrooomm! Pokey revved the engine, and Ness was blinded by the Ferrari's headlights as a terrible cloud of dust was kicked up into the air. Ness instinctively shielded his face from the pebbles and exhaust that came flying his way. ...And then Pokey was gone. In an instant, the mountain was totally silent once more.

Suddenly, Ness found himself completely alone. There wasn't a single street light–only the stars, twinkling coldly.

Woooooosh... A light breeze made a sound like the growling of wild dogs as it passed by. Rustle, rustle, rustle... The swaying leaves on the trees seemed to casually emphasize the fact that malice could be lurking nearby.

Now that the Ferrari's headlights and the flashing red and blue lights of the patrol car were gone, that mysteriously colored glow on the summit had become far more conspicuous. Even as he wondered if it could possibly be the bonfire of some fiendish alien, Ness's heart was still pulling him toward that light. Suspicious flames were still preferable to this absolute darkness.

Oh, that's right. I'm not totally alone out here, Ness suddenly remembered. Somewhere on this dark mountain was little Picky. Upon realizing that he had been left behind, the helpless Picky may have headed toward that mysterious light, too.

Alright then. Let's go, Ness thought, as he headed onward.

...But I wish I'd at least brought my bat with me.

At the peak of Mount Onett, the ground flattened out like a table. At the center of an area about the size of a soccer field was the observation deck–or at least, that's where it had been. Because now, tragically, half of it had been destroyed. And there, surrounded by rubble...there could be no mistaking it–was the meteorite.

“...This is amazing...!”

Ness looked around at everything, slowly.

The meteorite was about seven, maybe eight feet in diameter. It was an almost perfect sphere, and glittering red, blue, and green flames flickered across its rugged surface, appearing and disappearing like phantoms. A very strangely-scented steam rose and billowed from it, so most likely, it was still scorching hot.

Thump...thu-thump...thump...thu-thump... Ness's heart began to pound. And...was it his imagination...? The glowing of the sphere seemed to brighten and darken, keeping perfect time with his own heartbeat. And then...

Buzzzzzbuzzzzzbuzzzbuzzzzz...

He swatted his hand through the air, as he suddenly realized there was something hovering near his ear. It was a beetle. A huge, glossy, jet-black rhinoceros beetle with elegant horns was flying in circles around Ness's head. He swatted and swatted, but the thing was quite persistent.

“What a weird bug,” said Ness. “I wonder if it thinks I'm a tree or something...it better not try to pee on me...oh!” Under what little was left of the roof of the ruined observation deck, he could see someone. They were curled up and cowering, with their arms wrapped tight around their knees. …And they had red hair, cut to look a bit like a helmet. “Picky!” Ness cried. “Picky, are you okay?”

Ness ran over and shook his shoulder, and Picky cried out in surprise and flinched. Then, under those long bangs, his eyes opened in a wide stare.

“...Oh, you startled me,” he said. "What are you doing here?”

“Pokey asked me to come,” Ness replied. “You're not hurt, are you? Can you walk?”

“I'm okay,” said Picky, smiling through his tears. “My biological brother just abandoned me here, all alone, that's all. This will probably develop into some psychological trauma in the near future, but for now, I'm just relieved. Physically speaking, the only abrasions I have were there at the outset of this excursion.” Picky, an avid bookworm, had a strangely complicated way of speaking sometimes.

“Well, we should get back,” said Ness. “I'm sure your mom and dad are worried about you.”

Ness took his hand and tried to help him to his feet, but Picky's knees were so wobbly he couldn't walk. That mysterious glow from the meteorite dyed their arms and legs in reds and greens.

“Hang in there, Picky!” said Ness. “I'm sorry, but I'm not as strong as Pokey, I can't carry you on my back. Come on, keep trying.”

“...Hey, uhm...this is an unrelated question, but...” Picky began, with a bit of hesitation. “You said you met with my brother, right? Did Pokey seem like...Pokey, to you?”

“...What?”

“I mean, did he seem like the real Pokey?” Picky went on. “Did he seem like the same brother I've always known?”

As he looked into Picky's earnest, upturned eyes, which reflected the various colors of the flickering flames, a cold chill ran down Ness's spine. He felt a sudden trickle of goosebumps.

“...What are you saying, Picky?” he replied at last.

“Well, I...I saw it. ...When this thing fell here,” Picky said, as he jerked his chin in indication toward the meteorite and then shivered. “...Little fragments scattered everywhere. They slammed against the windshield...the ground was really shaking, and Pokey turned the wheel hard...and then suddenly the door opened, and I fell out. And then...an especially large fragment of the meteorite tore through the roof of the car...” Picky shut his eyes tight. “I heard a terrible scream, like, 'Gyaaaaaah!' The car suddenly lit up, like it was on fire. I thought there was no way Pokey didn't completely burn up in there...but then......well, are you really sure Pokey's alright...?”

“...Oh, cut it out,” said Ness, as he shook his head. “Pokey was just as horrible...I mean, just as healthy as ever. And as for the Ferrari......I didn't really get a good look at it, but...it didn't look like something had torn through it or anything like that. Now, Picky...are you just trying to scare me with some made-up story?”

“I'm not making any of this up!” Picky cried, as his face crinkled up in frustration. “There's no reason for me to lie about this! ...But...well...I guess it could have been a hallucination...or maybe a dream, or something. When I fell out of the car, I may have passed out for a little while from the pain and the shock...”

“I'm sure that's what it was,” said Ness, as he took hold of Picky's shoulder. “You were suffering from the shock of an awful experience, and you couldn't tell the difference between your dreams and reality.”

“I hope so,” said Picky. “But...do you really think that's what happened...Ness...?”

<Ness!>

Suddenly, a very strange voice blared through Ness's head loud enough to rattle his skull, and he jumped to his feet.

“Hey Picky, why are you yelling like that?”

“I didn't yell,” Picky replied, puffing out his cheeks. “What's wrong? Ness, you look so pale.”

<Ness! Ness! Ness! It's Ness! You're Ness! Is that right? Just as I thought, you're Ness, aren't you?>

Ness's eyes went wide as he covered his ears. This wasn't an ordinary voice. It was in his mind. These sharp, intense thoughts were resounding straight through his head and being sent directly to his heart.

Could this be that “telepathy” thing he'd always heard about?

<That's it, yes! It's telepathy! Ness, listen to me! Stay calm! I'm Buzz Buzz. I came here looking for you.>

Buzz Buzz? Just then, that persistent beetle flew across his nose. Ness gasped.

“You...you can't be... Are you...this beetle?!”

Bzzzzbzzzzbzzzz...BUZZZBUZZ! The insect flew about, sounding off his wings. Sometimes he flew too close, and sometimes too quickly, so that it was always hard to get a good look at him. Aside from the fact that he was maybe a little larger, he seemed the same as any ordinary rhinoceros beetle.

Ness gently pressed his fingers to his temples. “What the heck is going on?” he muttered. “Now I'm going all funny, too. Maybe it's the gas coming off of this meteorite– maybe it makes people hallucinate.”

“Ouch!💫”

The beetle used his tiny feet to yank a tuft of Ness's hair.

<How's that, are you ready to listen, now?>

“Well that was rude...but I understand,” said Ness. “If this were a dream, that would have woken me up. ...Huh? Picky? What's wrong?!”

For some reason, Picky was standing stock-still, his face locked in a vacant stare! He was stiff as a board, as if he had been frozen solid in an instant.

“What...what did you do to Picky?!”

<I haven't done anything to Picky. It's you I've done something to,> said Buzz Buzz, as he vibrated his wings loudly and with great pride. <You and I have entered a gap in time. Relatively speaking, of course, it would certainly appear as though the whole world, aside from you and I, has been frozen in time.>

A gap in time...? Frozen in time...? These were terribly stunning things to hear.

“Those kinds of things aren't possible!” Ness cried.

<They are possible,> Buzz Buzz replied. <But, space-time manipulation is a process that defies entropy. The reason I had to abandon my human body and assume the form of this beetle, with its incredibly small mass and very short lifespan, was because, physically speaking, this was the limit of what we were able to send back through time. In our future, that was all the energy we had left...and we did this, we did all of this, for the sake of delivering a message to you, Ness! So you don't have to have such an attitude about it, sheesh.>

“...I'm sorry,” Ness replied.

“The egg...of a vicious, cosmic monster...?!” Ness cried, blinking his eyes in surprise. “Oh I get it, you mean this weird meteorite then, don't you?”

<That's right,> said Buzz Buzz. <Giygas used it to cross through space and time. And as soon as it appeared in this dimension, so suddenly...oh boohoohoo! ...It absolutely crushed my time machine! My Shooting Star...it was such a cool device, with a totally futuristic, streamlined design...(sniffle)... Maybe I went a bit overboard, and my calculations were a little too perfectly on the mark...>

“Your calculations?”

<That's right,> Buzz Buzz replied. <We, the scientists of the future, all combined our intellect and our research, and we discovered that the egg would land in the vicinity of this observation deck, right here on Mount Onett. And so, I tried to go after it, but...oh man, all this jittery flying is really wearing me out. Let me rest for just a moment. ...Phew, thank you.> Ness offered his arm, and Buzz Buzz settled down on it, folding up his wings. <If I had been able to destroy the egg, it wouldn't have come to this, but unfortunately...I hadn't properly calculated any of its coordinates prior to these right here. And so...Giygas has been unleashed upon this world. And on top of all that, we don't even know what Giygas' larval state will look like. The newly-hatched Giygas will have assumed the form of your typical, average, every-day human being. He may have taken anyone who happened to be nearby as a host.>

“A...host?” said Ness, as his heart began beating even faster. “You mean this cosmic monster could have possessed someone?”

<Exactly!> cried Buzz Buzz. <The monster will grow inside the belly of an ordinary person. And a human being carrying Giygas would probably develop a wicked, treacherous, incredibly detestable personality. This is because Giygas would be controlling them from within. These waves of evil influence would affect more than just that person, they would spread out into the surrounding environment...and if that person had an even slightly twisted personality from the start, they may begin to sympathize with Giygas and his hostility against the earth, align themselves with Giygas, and become Giygas' puppet. ...And then, over the course of about half a year, slowly and surely he will grow. After the preparations for his final transformation have been completed, the monster Giygas will begin to eat through his host, until finally, he will emerge. Once it gets to that point, there will be nothing that anyone can do. And so, before that time comes, we must seek out, identify, and then eliminate the one who has become Giygas' host. ...And in this whole world, there is only one person who will do it, only one person who can do it. A young boy named Ness!>

“Me?”

<Yes, you! You, and three friends you will meet along the way. ...You three boys and this one girl are the only ray of hope left for this world. ...Oh, and please, take this.> Buzz Buzz spread his wing casings and pulled out a small, transparent, crystalline thing that had been tucked away inside.

“...A jewel?” asked Ness. It was round and very smooth, and when he held it up to the light, it sparkled in all seven colors of the rainbow.

<It's the Sound stone,> Buzz Buzz said, very solemnly. Or, rather, he thought very solemnly. <On this earth, Ness, there are several places which will be “Your Sanctuary”. Hidden within Your Sanctuaries are the secret sounds that will help set your inner self free. This stone is a special device meant to accurately record them. Once you have found all of Your Sanctuaries, and once you have gathered all of the sounds together...you will discover the real you, and you will attain your ultimate power. And once you have this power, you will be able to defeat that fiendish Giygas.>

“'My Sanctuaries'...?” said Ness. “...And just where am I supposed to find them?”

<Unfortunately, that is something that only you will know,> Buzz Buzz replied. <These places will call out to you. And if you find yourself within one, they will give you your answers.>

All of this talk was very confusing. It was the kind of talk that makes one's shoulders feel so very heavy.

But…

Ness lowered his eyes. The stone in his hand appeared to sparkle. It was slightly warm, and it seemed to encourage him, somehow.

“...I understand,” said Ness, and he nodded. “But...I can't travel very far. Right now, my papa is away. If I'm not there to help, there would be real trouble for my mama if a fuse blew out, or if she couldn't get a pickle jar open.”

<I'll explain everything to your mother,> Buzz Buzz replied, as he took to flying again. <Well, let's get back to the regular flow of time. First things first, Ness! Off to your house – LET'S GO!>

There was a very dizzying sensation as the air around them began to stir. The wind whirled and howled in his ears. Thump-thump. His heart pounded rapidly.

“...Ness, you look so pale,” said Picky, continuing right where he had left off. Just like un-pausing a video tape, the passage of time very quickly resumed. “If you're suffering from anemia, it's best to take a break and sit down for a while.”

In Ness's hand was the round, rainbow-colored stone. Near his head was Buzz Buzz, flying in circles.

...Apparently, all that he'd experienced just now hadn't been an illusion.

“I'm alright,” said Ness, and he shook his head and smiled at Picky. “But anyway, I think we should get you back to your house.”

“Yeah, thank you.”

The two of them ran down that mountain so fast they may as well have been in a race. Toward the town. Toward the light. When they came too close to a cliff, or there were potholes in the road ahead, Buzz Buzz would fly into Ness's line of sight and give him signals.

The mountain road was eerie at night. Stray dogs howled, and crows darted by overhead. The boys threw stones at them to chase them away. One's legs can never run as swiftly as the heart wishes that they could. And yet, somehow, they eventually made it to the fork in the road between the smaller path leading to Ness's house and the street which continued on to the Minch household.

Then, suddenly, from the shadow of a large tree...

“Picky! Ness! ...Oh thank goodness. I thought I might find you around here.”

...It was Pokey! They couldn't see him very well in the dark, but he appeared to be wearing an exaggeratedly gallant and virtuous expression on his face. “I've been looking all over for you,” he said. “Little children shouldn't be walking around out here so late at night. Let's go back home, quickly.” He turned and began to walk down the path.

“What are you trying to say, Pokey?” asked the very puzzled Picky. “You're the one who forced me to go with you to see that meteorite!”

“And is the Ferrari okay?” Ness added. “It looked like you were going so fast...you didn't hit anything, did you? …And besides that, what do you mean 'go back home'? Aren't you heading toward my house right now?”

As he turned to face them, Pokey wore the expression of someone who knew they'd been caught in some sort of lie, and he shook his head from side to side.

“Well, isn't it natural for me to want to escort a friend home, first?” he said. “I am bigger than the two of you, after all.”

Ness and Picky exchanged glances.

“Something's strange, here.”

“Very suspicious. Are you...really...the real Pokey...?”

“Heh, heh, heh...am I...?” Pokey smiled bitterly. “You foolish little children. If only you had been obedient, and gone along with it all, it wouldn't have ended so frighteningly for you...heh, heh, heh...ahahahaha, EEYAH!”

“Whoa!”

A star shower began to rain down around them. A gust of wind burst forth, and Pokey's body shone like a flashlight. Ness quickly leapt in front of Picky to protect him. Putting his hands on his hips, the chubby Pokey gave a powerful, boastful laugh, and in that bright light, he began to blur and distort until he had morphed into a very tall man, wearing something that looked a bit like a deep-sea diver's outfit.

<Starman Junior!> Buzz Buzz gasped. ...Or rather, he had a thought that was like a gasp, and this ragged exclamation was sent straight into Ness's brain.

“Heh, heh, heh, it's been a long time, Buzz Buzz,” said Starman Junior, as he raised one of his arms and thrust it forward menacingly. Apparently, his mother had never taught him that it was impolite to point.

“The great Giygas saw right through your pathetic plan so long ago...or should I say, so far into the future! Give it up, Buzz Buzz. You're no longer a hero, but just a useless insect. I'll stomp you hard!”

The world around them seemed suddenly distorted, and the atmosphere became heavy. A strange odor pierced his nose, and Ness felt as though he might sneeze. The Starman Junior was striking a haughty and prideful pose, and his raised right hand began to glow. He was drawing and concentrating some sort of power. Intense, sinister waves were beginning to swell around them.

He's trying to hurt us, somehow! thought Ness.

He shut his eyes tight, but then...

Buzz Buzz's thought resonated loudly, while in almost the same instant, a dry whirlpool of evil energy rushed at them with a terrible roar. Wham! It struck them. It was cold! And it stung! It was like having one's face shoved into a freezer turned to the strongest setting. But...probably thanks to this PSI Shield, or whatever it was, this shock only lasted for about a second. And then, quite unexpectedly, it was their enemy who cried out in pain. Ness opened his eyes to look. Their opponent was clutching his arm and writhing in pain. Apparently that shield had deflected his attack, and he'd been hurt by his own powers.

Ness wiggled his fingers and toes to make sure he could still move them. He didn't have even one cut, or a single burn. Thankfully Picky, who had collapsed beside him, seemed unhurt, too. Most likely, he had only fainted out of fear.

“...And he had the nerve to threaten us!” said Ness, gritting his teeth. He looked over, and the tiny Buzz Buzz was swinging all six of his legs wildly, but he could hardly land a single blow on their enemy.

Ness began to quiver with determination, competitive spirit, and a belief instilled in him by his little league team–“Sometimes, the best defense is a good offense”. He picked up a stone from the ground nearby. He held it up high. The other team had a runner headed for home. A very, very distant catcher held out a tiny mitt in desperation.

“...Eeeeeyyyaaaahhh!”

It was a powerfully thrown scorcher even if his form hadn't been perfect...and it pierced squarely into that mitt!

OUT!

“Gyyaaaahhh!” With an incredibly bright flash of sparks, Starman Junior vanished. He seemed to evaporate, almost instantly.

<Hmm. That was close,> said Buzz Buzz, his wings beating through the air as he flew back to Ness. <That guy was an assassin, sent here from ten years in the future to destroy me...and you, too. From now on, you'll probably encounter many others like him, so you must never let your guard down. ...But anyway, thank you. That was a wonderful throw! Just as I'd expect from you, Ness.>

Ness felt a little bashful. “Yeah, you too...you're really strong,” he said.

<Oh, you mean the PSI Shield? Oh no, no, my techniques and skills are somewhat low-ranking. Your latent abilities, though, are awfully, incredibly, ultra-amazing!>

“Me?” said Ness. “...You mean, one day I'll be able to do things like that, too?”

“Oh, really?” said Ness. “...It's something like that, huh...?”

Bit by bit, slowly but surely, Ness was becoming curious. If he was being commended for all this, then it probably wasn't something he should feel uneasy about. He even found himself longing to possess strange powers like those. But most importantly, above all else...

...If these enemies were going to be coming after Ness from now on, it would be dangerous for him to stay at home. And if he were to upset Buzz Buzz, he may not offer his help anymore. Ness did not have the knowledge or the strength to take on these kinds of monsters all by himself, and he was afraid of dragging his mama and Tracy into all this, too.

“I understand, Buzz Buzz,” he said at last, “and from here on out, I'll do what you say. But, before all that, I need to take Picky home.”

<Ah. That's right,> said Buzz Buzz.

“And come to think of it...” Whatever happened to Pokey?

Ness supported the still-dazed Picky with his shoulder and brought him back to his house. That red Ferrari was neatly tucked away in the garage. There was also another car there, a silver Volvo. It appeared that both of the Minches had come back from town.

“...Good evening,” said Ness, as he spoke nervously into the intercom. There came an immediate reply.

“Who's there?”

“It's Ness, from next door. I came to bring Picky home, but...”

“Little Ness! What on earth are you doing out there?”

The chain lock had hardly been undone before the door was yanked forcefully open. And there stood Lardna, Mr. Minch's wife. She had frizzy hair in such a bright shade of red it looked like her head was on fire. Her wide mouth seemed to tear across her face from ear to ear. Just like Pokey, she was stout and fat. Her ears and neck were heavily adorned with jewelry.

“Oh, Picky, Picky, what happened to you, you poor little thing?” she cried, as she grabbed the still-listless Picky by the nape of his neck and snatched him away, then held him tight and rubbed her cheek against his. “Now, Little Ness! I don't know what you were doing out there...checking out the meteorite, or whatever, but please, never drag my son along with you ever again! We run a proper household here, unlike yours!”

“Huh? But, I...” Ness began.

“Now, now, Picky,” Lardna interrupted. “Be a good boy. Brush your teeth, and then go beddy-bye.”

She retreated into the house, and in her place Aloysius Minch appeared, puffing on his pipe. He was Mrs. Minch's husband. And he was wearing a shiny and terribly expensive-looking blue robe.

“Ahh, young Ness,” he said. "It appears my son owes you one.” His lips were curved into a kind shape, but those blue eyes weren't smiling at all. “I hope things haven't been too rough for you, with your papa being away for so long. And how is that gorgeous Rachael...I mean, your mama, how is she doing? Tell her I'd like to take her to dinner sometime. And that I'd be glad to invite her to the kind of high-class restaurant your papa would never be able to take her to.”

Well that will never happen, Ness thought. I'm sure if I told her that, mama would make a face like, “yeeuuck”, and turn you down for sure.

“Uhm, Mr. Minch, do you know where Pokey is?” Ness asked.

“Hasn't he been in his room this whole time?” Mr. Minch replied. “You can go up there, if you need to see him.”

“Okay,” said Ness.

He went up to the second floor and into Pokey's room. And there was Pokey, sitting at his desk, his rounded shoulders hunched up and looking so much like dumplings as he scribbled something with a great deal of passion.

“...Pokey?”

“Oh, Ness, good evening,” said Pokey, as he turned around and gave Ness an extremely warm-hearted smile. “I'm doing my math homework right now. Numerals are great, I never thought arithmetic could be this interesting!”

Ness was dumbfounded. This was not Pokey. Sure, the face and the body were Pokey, but...that polite, proper way of speaking was just bizarre. And most importantly, the real Pokey would never be this enthusiastic about studying. When it came to homework, he would always just threaten the other kids until they gave him their notebooks and he'd copy it!

“...Who...who are you?” asked the very puzzled Ness. “...Are you another Starman Junior?”

“You're so funny, Ness,” Pokey chuckled. “You go to see one meteorite, and then it's all you can think about. Do you want to play ‘UFO’?”

<His eyes are completely out of focus...he's being controlled......he's the one!> cried Buzz Buzz, as he flew around excitedly. <Ness! We've found him, it's Giygas! The larval Giygas has taken this kid as his host! ...And he doesn't seem to have any of Giygas' consciousness, yet...he still seems to be mimicking the behavior of a typical human boy. ...If we take care of it now, it should be no problem! Well, let's finish him off!>

“B-but......!” Ness stammered, feeling very conflicted. “What you're saying is...well, it's awful! Pokey...Pokey is...well, maybe I don't like him very much, but I guess we're kinda, sorta friends...”

“What's wrong, Ness? Are you mumbling to yourself?” asked Pokey, as he came over to Ness and put a hand to his forehead. “No, you don't have a fever. You should be careful when it comes to summer colds. It costs money to see a doctor, you know.”

<Ness, what are you waiting for?> cried Buzz Buzz. <This is for the future of the planet, and for all the six billion people on it!>

“But…I can't......I can't do it,” said Ness. "...I can't be the one to do this...”

<...Well, if you won't do it, then I will...!>

“Hey, you still haven't gone home?” interrupted Lardna. She had returned from putting Picky to bed in the next room over, and when she noticed Ness, she raised her shoulders with a huff. “Wandering around late at night is the first step toward delinquency. What is that, that bug? I think it's a buzzy, annoying dung beetle...Ayaaaeee!”

...Ah!

And then...

...And then, far too suddenly, without any warning...with no way to stop it from happening, and allowing Ness no time to prepare himself for what came next...Lardna lashed out with her thick, sturdy arm, and as she did, Buzz Buzz, the one on whom humanity's future depended, was knocked to the floor.

“Aha. It's not a dung beetle after all!” Lardna cried. “It's a giant one of THOSE! DIE, you terrible thing!” She took off her slipper and beat him with it, mercilessly. He was crushed flat within seconds...!

“M...ma'am, you have it all wrong, you don't understand, please stop!” cried Ness, as he leapt to the floor. Oh, but it was too late. It was far too late.

Buzz Buzz's horn had been snapped in two, and some of his legs had been torn off. His wings were crushed and flattened. Ness lifted him in his hand, as some sort of fluid oozed steadily from his side. He was twitching with tiny convulsions.

<...Ness...I'm sorry......>

“Buzz Buzz!”

Lardna finally came to her senses, and when she realized that, oh dear, it hadn't been a cockroach at all, but a rhinoceros beetle, her face turned beet-red. “Well, if he was such a precious insect, you should have been keeping him in some kind of cage or something,” she huffed. “It's an easy mistake to make!” She stomped away loudly.

“...I'm so sorry, Ness,” said Pokey, gently. “My mom really hates...those things. When she thinks she sees one of them, she goes into a panic. ...He was a really beautiful beetle though, wasn't he? I bet he was expensive. But there's nothing we can do, now... Wait here a minute, I'll have my dad pay you back for him.”

And with that, Pokey rushed off.

“This can't be happening, it can't be true,” said Ness. “...Buzz Buzz...you can't die like this, please hold on...”

Ness slumped to the floor with a dull thud.

<No...I'm done for...I won't be able to help you anymore,> said Buzz Buzz. He mustered the last of his strength, slowly lifted his half-crushed horn, and looked intently into Ness's eyes. <The kindness to protect a friend is just another thing that makes you who you are, Ness...heh-heh-heh. You do not have to force yourself to handle that boy just yet. You will understand in the end...the time will come. The time when the world's energies and your life force will become one... And so, Ness, first you must head to Twoson. You will find Paula there.>

“Paula?” said Ness. “Who is that?”

And at just that moment, as if in answer to his question...

<Ness...Ness......>

...He could hear someone's voice. No...it was more telepathy. It was appealing directly to his heart. Like a little bird singing high in the sky, he couldn't tell from where, or from how far away, this whispered song had come.

<...Ness...my friend who I have not met yet......I am Paula......can you sense that I am calling out to you? If you can sense it, please answer me! Ness...Ness......I am Paula...>

And then, so much like a quick little bird, just as soon as he thought he'd caught it, it slipped away again.

Now that the voice was gone, he was shocked by how lonely he suddenly felt. And there was something so pure, so lovely, so warm...so indescribably tender, that filled Ness's heart.

A friend. That's what she had called him. And that's what he wanted to be. He wanted to meet her. …As soon as possible.

An all-too sudden, straightforward longing swelled within him, and Ness couldn't help but blush.

<There, there now,> said Buzz Buzz, and his smile came through even in his thoughts. <Paula is one of three destined friends of yours who are scattered throughout this world. Her PSI is already considerably powerful. She will be very helpful to you, and will guide you.>

“I understand,” said Ness. “I'll go. I'll look for this girl named Paula! And of course, I'll look for My Sanctuaries, too! So, Buzz Buzz, please, I need you to get better. I need you to recover!”

<Unfortunately, that is an impossible request,> Buzz Buzz replied. <Ness...the world is in your hands.> He weakly lifted one of his tiny, thorny feet, as if he were reaching out for Ness's hand...and then, with that, Buzz Buzz became still.

So completely, perfectly still.

Ness's heart suddenly felt so hollow. He couldn't help but close his eyes.

It's in your hands.

Buzz Buzz's last words overlapped a memory of the voice of his father, from just before he had been sent overseas. Visions of his father's beaming face, with just a small hint of a frown, appeared behind his eyelids.

Your papa always believes in you, Ness. You work hard, just like your mother. Even when things get a little rough, I know you won't give up without a fight. Don't push yourself too hard, but try to stay as high-spirited as you can. A droopy posture only puts pressure on all your insides and stunts your growth. Even when you think things are too tough, just puff out your chest and give it everything you've got.

Ness slowly opened his eyes and stood up, holding Buzz Buzz's remains gently in his hand. He went down the stairs, through the hallway, and left the Minches' house. He could hear Mr. Minch's shouts of, “What nonsense! Me, pay a reimbursement for the price of an insect?!” coming from the living room, but he did not meet anyone along the way, and so he did not need to speak to anyone.

And as soon as he made it out through their front door...

Had that much time really passed without him realizing it? The tips of the mountains to the east had a rosy pink glow to them, and almost instantly the morning sun began to fill the sky with light. It was as if the sun were trying to convince Ness to raise his head, which hung so low with worry and confusion about his future, and turn it toward the heavens. ...To get him to stretch out his huddled arms and legs with a lively pop! ...To raise his clouded spirits and clear his head right out.

This morning felt especially wonderful.

...Alright! I'm gonna do this, he thought. I'm gonna be brave, and I'm gonna head out. First to the next town over, Twoson, to look for a girl named Paula. And then one day, sure enough, I'm gonna fight that Giygas guy.

I'll do it for Buzz Buzz, who went through so much trouble to come here from ten years in the future.

I'm gonna do my best!

He returned home, and told his family what he planned to do. He expected his mama and Tracy to laugh it right off when he told them his story that sounded so much like a dream, but instead, they listened very intently.

“You know,” his mother began, “a long time ago, I went to see a master fortune-teller, who was very famous for her accuracy. And she told me this–Soon, you will give birth to a son, and this child will grow to become the boy who will save our world...at that point, I thought it was all just empty talk. But now I'm convinced it was the truth, all along.”

“Don't worry about us,” Tracy reassured him. “Everything will be okay. Even if Mr. Minch comes around trying to sweet-talk mama, we know how to get rid of him, so we'll be just fine!”

Ness pulled the straps of his yellow backpack over his shoulders. He put on his bright red baseball cap. He rested his favorite bat, which his father had given him for his last birthday, on his shoulder.

His spirits were high, and his gait was carefree. Ness set out full of enthusiasm.

Away from his cozy home. The home that he loved so much.

Now, the adventure begins...!

Chapter 2 – The First Trial

They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks, and Trixie was the name of a famous circus dog back in the old days...wait, what the heck?

Where were we...oh yes. Even though he had begun his journey with such an enthusiastic departure, Ness was in quite a fix, now. The road leading to Twoson had been blocked off very thoroughly by a great number of patrol cars. And when he tried to stealthily slip through at one end, looking quite suspicious, he was immediately hauled away by the police.

“You seem too young to be one of the Sharks' goons,” Captain Strong began, crossing his arms. His muscles, which he had honed through Super Ultra Mambo-Tango-Foxtrot martial arts, bulged and rippled as he glared at Ness. “...But lately, these delinquents are getting younger and younger. ...Hey. Kid. Why were you desperate to leave town? Are you working for Frank?”

“No way!” Ness replied. “You mean the leader of those punks who took over the arcade? That Frank? I've never even met him.”

“Telling lies isn't going to help you, here,” said the captain, and he glared straight at Ness. Without flinching, Ness glared back.

“...Alright then,” said the captain, with a smile. “I believe you. I'm letting you go, but you have to head straight back to your own house. At times like these, kids like you should be home playing Nintendo games.”

“But I have to get to Twoson no matter wh–”

“Don't talk back to me!” roared the captain, as he pointed his finger at Ness aggressively. “And don't disobey me! And if I catch you wandering around without a parent or guardian again, I'll lock you up for real next time!”

Ness tried to explain the situation to him, but the captain waved him off dismissively and picked up the telephone. “Maggie? Send Jim in here. And then, can you connect me to town hall? ...Ah, hello? This is Police Captain Strong speaking, is this Mayor Pirkle? Yes, I'd like to speak with you about our plans to take down that nasty thug...yeah, I can hold.”

“You called for me, Captain?”

A tall, lanky young officer in full uniform had stepped into the room. The captain put his hand over the receiver. “Ah, Jim. Escort that kid back home for me, will you?” he replied, haughtily.

“Understood,” said the young officer. “...Well, son, let's go.”

The officer placed his large hand on Ness's shoulder as the captain became fully engrossed in his phone conversation. There was nothing Ness could do. He left the room, just as he was being urged to do.

On the far side of a glass partition there were a great number of officers. Some of them were discussing something or other so enthusiastically that they were showering one another with spit, some were practicing quickly drawing their guns from side holsters under their suits, and others appeared to be sampling a cherry pie. There were also some who were trying to handle zealous groups of people who had come to protest the euthanasia of stray dogs, or who were calling for something to be done about all the hoodlums in town.

A group of people who looked like a SWAT team jogged noisily down the corridor. As they passed a female officer who was coming the other way, they bumped into the stack of paperwork she had been carrying and sent it flying. For a moment it looked as if she was going to say something, but then she seemed to resign herself to her fate and she threw both her hands into the air defeatedly. Ness and Jim offered to help her gather the scattered paperwork.

“Oh, thank you so much, Jim,” said the woman. She fixed her crooked glasses and fluttered her eyelashes as she looked at the young officer. “Good grief, wow, everyone's really on edge lately. I haven't even had time to do my favorite thing–cracking down on all those parking violations!”

“You're so right, Maggie,” said Jim, and he looked truly spellbound as he took Maggie's hand. “It's such a shame, I miss seeing you pull out your chalk on an improperly parked vehicle. Any time I get to see that, it's the absolute best.”

“O-ho! And the way you tear off a traffic violation ticket...it's always so charming and sexy!” Maggie replied.

“I really hope we get to go out on patrol together again soon,” said Jim.

“Oh me too, honey. ❤ The next time we're out there, we're gonna enforce laws like crazy.”

“Uhmm...excuse me,” said Ness. Completely unnoticed, he approached the cuddling couple as they looked adoringly into each other's eyes, and he questioned them shyly. “Why is everyone so on edge?”

“Huh? Why wouldn't everyone be on edge right now?” Jim replied, shrugging his shoulders. “We've got mysterious meteorites falling out of the sky, and all those hoodlums running wild. A state of emergency has been called. If riots break out, or bad folks show up just looking to cause trouble, things could get pretty serious. Mayor B.H. Pirkle really does not want to lose this upcoming election. And the captain's really worried about that, too...but I don't think that's something a little kid like you would really understand.”

It bothered Ness to be spoken down to like that. The mayor and the police chief were such good friends that they each had married the other's younger sister, and everyone in Onett knew this. Even kids in elementary school knew this.

The police and the local government were a tight-knit tag team, and any time they deemed a situation to be more substantial than it really was, a state of emergency would be declared and martial law would be imposed immediately, setting their small town on edge. ...And then those famous roadblocks would go up. At this rate, he had no idea when he would ever be able to make it to Twoson.

All this, with a world-wide crisis looming!

Ness sighed. He would have to get them to take down the blockades. But the captain wouldn't listen to him, and as for the mayor, if an elementary school kid came around to ask him for a favor, he'd probably say there wasn't much he could do. The town hall building was very big, very square, and very intimidating. ...And Ness didn't even have the right to vote!

But...maybe...

If the cause of the state of emergency were to be eliminated, then both the captain and the mayor would be very pleased. Impressed, even.

Should he tell them that the meteorite was nothing but an empty eggshell, and that there was no need to be afraid of it? ...No, that was no good. He had no way to prove it. They'd just laugh out loud. And if he showed them the Sound stone, they'd probably just bark, “Where did you steal that from?!” and throw him in jail. And besides that, the meteorite itself may have been harmless, but the evil influences of that fiendish alien Giygas were surely drawing nearer all the time. He didn't want to cause the adults to let down their guard too much.

And so...

Ness turned it all over in his mind, and then, he had an idea. It wasn't an idea that made him very happy, but he had no choice but to try it.

“Hey, Mr. Jim, I can get home on my own,” he said. “I'll be alright, you don't have to escort me all the way there.”

“Oh, really?” replied Jim, who still hadn't let go of Maggie's hand. “If you say so, then it's fine with me. I'm really busy with something else anyway, so you'd be doing me a favor.”

“Oh yes, you're really busy with something, aren't you?” said Maggie, as she wound part of Jim's shirt around one of her fingers and fiddled with it excitedly.

“Right. Well, I'll just see myself out then,” said Ness. “Bye-bye!”

He lifted his hat and bowed to them, but since Jim and Maggie never took their eyes off of one another, he highly doubted that they had even noticed.

Ness put on the face of a model elementary school student as he exited the police station, and like a good little boy he set off in the direction of his house. But, as soon as he'd rounded the corner and was sure none of the cops would be able to see him, he turned right around and hurried off the other way. The arcade was in the southern part of town.

The first floor of an old rented building on a dimly-lit back alley corner... Electronic beeping and blipping sounds lingering in the air... Dust-covered crane game machines... This was the arcade. The hangout spot for local hoodlums. Posters of last year's new release games were spread out across the glass windows, which were reinforced with packing tape as if there had been a scuffle, and worn-out old bikes and scooters were thoughtlessly strewn about, completely blocking the sidewalk. A battered trash can had been knocked over, scattering fast food wrappers and cups all over the ground.

There were three young boys, all of them filthy and covered in dirt, with their shirts hanging out of baggy shorts that looked like the kind a basketball player would wear, lounging sluggishly by the side of the road and chatting about this or that. One of the boys noticed Ness, and his smile vanished. The other two realized he'd spotted something and turned to look. One of them tossed a cigarette aside. The other stood up.

“Good morning,” said Ness, as he approached them calmly. “Is there a guy here named Frank? I just need to talk with him for a bit.”

“Who the hell're you?” said the tallest kid, with hair that looked like a mop, as he spat on the ground. “You got any money?”

“Money?” Ness repeated, sounding puzzled. “...Why?”

“When someone asks you a question, it's prob'ly best to answer it, no?” the mop kid replied. “...Well, if you don't have any money...” He reached out with his long arms and snatched Ness's hat from his head. “...This'll do just fine. Ho-hoo, whaddya think? Does it look good on me?”

“For sure!”

“Very stylish!🎵”

The hooligans slapped their knees and cackled vulgarly. His head was way too big, and the hat didn't fit at all. The mop kid put a hula hoop to his hips, stuck out his backside, and began to walk around swinging his hands out in front of him to mimic a pair of large breasts. Then, with one final, “tee-hee!♥”, he struck an obscene pose.

Ness's cheeks suddenly turned red with rage.

“Cut that out, and give it back!” he cried.

“Hehehe, if you want it back, you'll have to take it yourself!” said a boy wearing protective pads on his knees and elbows as he flew past on his skateboard, snatching the hat as he went.

Ness turned to face him, and as he did, the last boy, who was wearing aviator goggles, bounded up behind him on a pogo stick. He took hold of Ness's backpack, and yanked it hard. Ness's bat slipped out of the umbrella holster it had been stored in, and he tripped and fell. The hooligans soon got tired of throwing the baseball cap back and forth to one another, so they tossed it on the ground and started stomping on it and kicking it around like a soccer ball. The skateboarder grazed Ness's face as he chased after his stolen hat, and when Ness recoiled, the kid with the hula hoop rammed into him from behind. In the end Ness was cowering on the asphalt, and this only riled the hooligans even more. They began to bully him harder.

“What the hell kinda business could a little brat like you possibly have with 'Fail-Proof' Frank?”

“Hehehe, maybe he likes getting his ass kicked!”

“Or maybe he wants to join the Sharks? Did you get scolded by your mama, and now you want to become a little bad boy?”

“If you want to join us, kid, you'll have to toughen up and learn to fight better than that!”

One of the boys threw the red baseball cap, which now looked like a clump of crumpled garbage, onto the ground. When Ness reached out to grab it, the other boy's pogo stick slammed his hand into the ground with a terrible THUNK! Laughing shrilly, and spitting their chewed gum down at Ness as they went, the hooligans headed for the arcade.

...Damn it! thought Ness, as he clenched his teeth and stood up. He didn't want to use a dangerous weapon against them, but it was one versus three. And besides, they had been using unfair tools against him. He couldn't take this lying down!

He put the tattered hat back on his head, and he picked his bat up off the ground.

“...Wait,” he said.

The three hooligans turned around, and when they saw Ness holding the bat in his hand, they looked at each other with a bit of surprise.

“I asked you where Frank is,” Ness went on. “Answer me.”

“...Hey, now,” said mop kid, as he shrugged his shoulders coolly. “Don't get yourself so worked up, kid. We were just just playing around. You know? It was a joke.”

“Well I'm being very serious,” Ness replied. He glared at the three of them from the shadow cast by the brim of his red hat, and steadily he advanced on them. “I'm here to meet Frank.”

The three hooligans exchanged glances with one another. The kid holding the skateboard under his arm shook his head very dramatically.

“You should know that 'Fail-Proof' Frank has an even shorter temper than we do, and he gets mad quick,” he said. “I don't know what you're trying to talk to him about, but if you make him angry, there'll be trouble. That guy has action and violence for all three meals of every single day. You never know–you might wind up in the hospital.”

“I'm here to meet him,” Ness insisted.

The three hooligans were silent. Suddenly each of their faces had become very serious. The kid with the aviation goggles shrugged his shoulders. Mop kid nodded dubiously.

“Just remember. We tried to warn you, shorty.”

“Yeah.”

“Come on.”

Mop kid jerked his head in an indication to follow him. Ness remained silent as he walked along behind him.

The arcade was dim, chilly, damp, and eerie, like a submarine-themed ride at an amusement park. The air was stagnant, and the game cabinets were all lined up in sterile rows. Ness could see people standing here and there, but when he came near them, none of them even raised their heads. There was a guy playing pinball with a vacant, possessed look on his face, a guy firing off an electronic machine gun who looked so pale that Ness worried for his health, and a guy with his mouth hanging wide open as he played some kind of rock-paper-scissors game that had a nearly-naked woman on the screen. All of them were completely oblivious to their surroundings. Aside from the occasional PEW PEW! sound of a direct missile hit, and the strangely cheerful march-style theme song of some character or another, the place was terribly quiet.

Ness's group headed down the stairs and into the basement. At the very end of a cramped hallway that smelled like a public toilet, mop kid lightly knocked on a door. “What is it?” said a low voice, in response. Mop kid moved awkwardly out of the way and spurred Ness forward. “We warned you.”

Ness nodded.

The three of them turned and climbed back up the stairs, glancing back at Ness a few times as they went.

Ness grabbed the knob and opened the door.

This small room, which was somehow even darker than the rest of the place, was lit by the orange glow of a single lamp. And there, wearing a suit and sporting the type of pure-black sunglasses that you might expect a blind person to use, was a man who looked to be about twenty years old, leaning over a billiard table with very worn felt.

He struck with the cue and sent the white ball rolling, and it in turn collided with several other balls and knocked them into motion. One or two of the balls continued until they reached the corners of the table (known as the “pockets”), and as they fell in, there was a resounding rumbling sound. The man walked silently around the table. From a different angle this time, he set his aim once again on the white ball.

“Are you Frank?”

When Ness spoke, the man raised his eyes and glanced at him.

“Who are you?” he replied.

“My name is Ness. I came here to ask for a favor.”

Without saying a word, Frank smiled, and struck with the cue a second time. Once again, several balls rumbled as they fell into the pockets.

“I have to get to Twoson as soon as possible,” Ness went on. “But the road out of town is blocked. The police say it's a state of emergency or something like that, so no one can get through. And one reason they're being so cautious is because you guys keep causing trouble.”

“Ho-hoo!” Frank picked up a square of chalk and rubbed it against the tip of the billiard cue. It made an uncomfortable sound, like nails scraping against a blackboard. “That mighty King of Cops sure has a lot of time on his hands, doesn't he? ...But, if that's what they're expecting of me, I'll have to raise some sort of hell again soon, then. ...And of course, if I were to do that, it would allow you to slip right through the barrier unnoticed, now, wouldn't it?”

Clunk! More balls fell into the pockets. Now there were only two left.

“How much is it worth to you?” Frank asked.

Ness remained silent.

“Hey, I said how much is it worth to you, boy?” Frank asked again, raising his voice. “Just for the record, Frank ain't cheap.” Carefully, oh so carefully, he got himself into position. “Alright then, how does five hundred dollars sound?”

“Wait...please, hear me out!” Ness cried. “The truth is we're facing a world-wide catastrophe, here!”

Whiff! The cue slipped and only gently nudged the side of the white ball. As if it were being drawn in by some invisible force, the white ball sank right into the pocket. Frank's eyebrows rose over the top of those black sunglasses.

“That's why I have to get to Twoson no matter what, and I have to meet a girl named Paula,” Ness went on. “A nasty alien named Giygas has come here from ten years in the future, and he's trying to take over the world. This isn't the time for human beings to be fighting against each other! Frank, please make peace with Captain Strong somehow. That way, there'd be no need for things like roadblocks.”

Frank pulled out the white ball, and then all the other balls, and he set them back up again, seeming to drag his feet as he went.

“Frank! I'm begging you!” Ness cried.

“Be quiet,” said Frank, as he shot a glance at Ness and rolled his shoulders. “I've heard enough. What are you playing at, anyway?” He touched his fingers to the sides of his head and rubbed his temples in circles. “If you don't get out of here, I'm going to wallop you. So go home, fast, before I lose it. Go back to your room, hold your crystal ball up to the window, fine-tune your chakras, and use your telepathy to communicate with the reincarnations of the righteous warriors of the lost Mu continent, or whatever it is you do in your spare time.”

“I know it's hard to believe, but I'm telling the truth,” said Ness. “You remember that meteorite that fell yesterday? Well, Buzz Buzz rode here on it from the future. And I ran into a guy called Starman Junior, too. That guy was an assassin, sent here from the future to–”

“I told you to shut up, you little bastard!” Frank roared, as he snapped the billiard cue in half by slamming it against the table. He approached Ness with a ferocious scowl. “People who take their silly games too seriously...and screech and squawk about their stupid daydreams...are just so ANNOYING!”

He grabbed Ness by his throat and lifted him up. The tips of Ness's toes were just barely touching the floor.

“You should never bother your superiors,” Frank went on. “Didn't they teach you this in school?!” Fwip! Suddenly he pulled out a knife. The gleaming, silver edge felt cold on Ness's cheek.

“Heh, heh, heh. Are you scared?” said Frank. “Try not to piss yourself, it'd be such a hassle to clean later. ...Oh-ho-ho! What do you have there? A baseball bat? Oh, no way, ah-haaa-hahaha-ha! Don't make me laugh!”

Frank shoved him hard, and Ness crashed into the door. He slammed against something solid in his backpack and it knocked the wind right out of him. His throat had gone dry in Frank's grasp, and he fell into a violent coughing fit.

“Alright, brat. Now we're going to try a little exercise,” said Frank. “I don't mind. Go ahead, use that bat of yours and come at me with all you've got!” From his right hand to his left. From his left back to his right. He passed the knife back and forth with a wide grin on his face. “Come on, come on, hurry up. If you won't come for me...then I'll come for you!”

Frank lunged suddenly, and Ness instinctively blocked the knife with his bat. Alright! The knife had gotten stuck in the wood–he'd disarmed his foe! However, just as Frank flashed Ness what appeared to be an almost respectful smile...he immediately pulled a set of darts out of nowhere!

“Hey now, hey now, hey now!” Frank cried. “Stay focused, brat, or you're gonna end up full of holes!”

The darts were as sharp as needles, and they flew at Ness one after the other! He had to wonder if Frank had maybe been wild about darts before he got into billiards–his throws were just so incredibly accurate and effective. Ness frantically swung his bat and twisted himself every which way to dodge them, but one after another Frank pulled out a seemingly endless supply! To make matters worse, while Ness was fully focused on dodging the darts, Frank was able to slide in close to him, unnoticed. He swept Ness's legs out from under him, then came at him with a brass-knuckle-punch! Ness fought back desperately with his bat, but in the end, he was out-matched. Frank was just too skilled at dodging.

“Ah-hahahahaha! Dance for me, dance!” cackled Frank, with a crazed smile on his face as he attacked Ness relentlessly. “Stupid little pest. Your arrogance makes me sick, you cocky brat. A little bastard like you should be in school, filling out some bubble-sheet test like a good boy!”

Frank grabbed Ness by his hair and threw him. Ness landed on his back on the cold, tiled floor. Frank pressed his shiny, polished wingtip shoe down on Ness's cheek. He snatched the bat away and rammed it viciously into Ness's stomach.

“Ah-hahaha! Cry, kid,” said Frank. “Go ahead, cry! Tender-hearted Frank might even forgive you! ...What's that? That look on your face? Children like you need to learn to be more obedient! When you know you've done something wrong, the first thing to do is make a sincere apology. Isn't that right, brat? Go on, say you're sorry for all the trouble you caused. Say something like, 'I was the biggest, dumbest idiot in the entire world for going against the Mighty Frank's wishes and telling him my stupid story!' Go on! Say it! Say it loud and clear, you little jerk!”

Ness's head was pounding, his vision was fading in and out, and something acidic was being forced from his stomach into his mouth. His arms and legs had become listless and heavy, and he couldn't move them. Any moment now, he was going to lose consciousness.

Being a young boy, Ness had encountered his share of punching and slapping here and there. In the past, there had been many times he thought he might even be risking his life in heated showdowns with the other boys during baseball games.

But this is on a whole other level, Ness thought, in a daze. This is actual, real violence. But, even this...

...Even this fight is baby snot compared to a fight against that monster Giygas, a threat to this entire world... Frank might be taking it too far, but he's still using some restraint. He doesn't really want to kill me. He's still reasonable enough to know how wrong it would be if he actually put the life of one of the town's children in danger.

...I can't expect a monster from outer space to have manners like that.

As he thought this, Ness couldn't help but smile weakly.

“Hmm?” Frank scowled. “What's this? You...you still haven't learned your lesson, yet?!”

Whack! Wham! Whump-whump-whomp!

Frank beat Ness some more. He punched him, threw in some kicks. Ness felt the uncomfortable sensation of blood running from the back of his nose down into his throat. His eyes had swollen to the point that he could no longer see very well. He had lost all feeling in his fingers, as Frank had stomped down on them with all his might. Ness was sure that some of his bones had been broken.

But...I can't afford to surrender to something like this. I can't give up. I made a promise to Buzz Buzz! I have to look for My Sanctuaries, and become my true self! I have to save the world! And...in order to do that, first I have to go to Twoson, and I have to meet Paula!

<...Ness......Ness...!>

...He started to get the feeling that whenever he thought of Paula, he could suddenly hear her voice.

Whoosh!

All through his body, like a flashlight flickering to life, from somewhere deep within himself there came a bright, white light that refreshed him instantly. He felt no more pain. No more suffering. His spirit was revived, and all his energy was restored. He felt just like a toy that had been given new batteries.

<Yes! That's Psycho-Healing!>

Encouraged by the sound of Paula's voice, Ness's eyes snapped open. He even surprised himself. As Frank, who was dripping with sweat and taking ragged breaths, peered down at him, he looked so small and frail, somehow. Suddenly he seemed like such an awfully timid, lonely, pitiful man.

“...Are you done, now?” asked Ness, as he smiled kindly and got to his feet without retaliating. He patted his shorts to get rid of dust and dirt, and he spoke calmly. “If you're up to it, Frank, then please hear me out. Please stop all the fighting, and quit causing so much trouble, so that Captain Strong and everyone else can relax a bit.”

“W...what are you, a ghost or something...?!” cried Frank, as he slipped in a puddle of his own sweat and knocked his sunglasses askew. Stumbling, he fled back against the wall, where he hit some sort of switch.

“Damn it! I guess it's come down to this–my last resort,” he said. “Behold! The invincible battle robot built by none other than yours truly–The Frankystein Mark II!”

There was a sound like cannon fire, and in an instant the plywood ceiling and the brick wall behind Frank crumbled to the ground. Ness could see, through the freshly-torn hole in the building, framed by the blue sky above and almost completely blocking the view of the cramped back lot, a misshapen mass of metal that looked as though it had been thrown together by hand from a collection of scrap metal and other debris.

“Fwoonga!” The thing raised one of its hands and flashed an obscene gesture, and Ness finally understood just what it was he was looking at. In very general terms...it was a huge robot with tank treads where its feet should have been!

“Wahahaha, go! Go on, Frankystein Mark II!” cried Frank. “Get rid of this little brat!” He flipped a lever on a box-shaped device. Fwoooosh~! Steam blasted from a part of the robot's head that looked like the lid of a tea kettle. Its eyes, which looked just like Frank's sunglasses, flashed from red to green.

Ness held his bat in a bunting position and braced his legs.

But, no matter how skilled a batter Ness was, if this thing came for him he'd be squashed flat instantly! Cold sweat ran down his back.

<Paula! Paula, can you hear me?> Ness cried out, in his mind. <Please help me! Tell me what I should do...!>

<Don't panic, Ness,> Paula replied. <At times like this, the best thing to do is to use PSI!>

<PSI? What is that? How do I use it? Wh-what do I do? ...Uwaaaugh!>

Puuunch! The robot swung down hard with its ridiculously large fist. Just as it did, Ness counter-attacked with his bat. Fweeeee! The robot cradled its wounded hand and let out a pained whistle of steam. But both of Ness's hands were trembling from the impact, too. Any moment now, he was going to drop the bat.

<Hey, hey now, don't back down!> said Paula, telepathically. <Stand and fight! You have to believe in yourself! Take all of your spiritual energy, pack it tightly into a little ball, and then imagine throwing it, as hard as you can...!>

“Pack it...into a ball...?” said Ness.

He dropped the bat, let his arms dangle loosely at his sides, and tried to steady his breathing.

“Hey, keep going!” cried Frank. “Jeeze, don't just stand there cowering like that, Frankystein Mark II!” He fiddled with the remote control and the robot blasted out more steam. Then, like a bull in a fighting ring, it lowered its head and charged!

“A little, white ball...” Ness murmured. He pictured his own energy becoming a baseball. Not the soft, somewhat larger ones they always used in school, but one of the real regulation balls the adults use. He gripped it tight, and then he wound up...and threw a perfect fastball!

“NNNNOOOOOoooOOooOOO!”

That ball became an electric blitz, shooting off sparks as it went and taking the form of a twisting and undulating pure-white dragon. And then...KER-POW! A powerful direct hit! Beyond a doubt, it was a strike! The antenna in the robot's nose was completely destroyed. And the robot, coughing out steam, collapsed pitifully, becoming nothing but a pile of junk once more.

“Oh...ohhhh...hohhhh...” Frank fell dejectedly to his knees. His jaw dropped loosely. “What the...what was that, just now?” he said. “I...I don't believe it...what did you just do, what the heck was that...?”

“It was a PSI Rockin' Hundred-Fifty-Mile-an-Hour Fastball is what it was!” cried Ness, as he retrieved his bat with a huge grin on his face.

“So you...” Frank began, and he trembled as he looked at Ness. “...You're the real deal, then. That was...that was that psychokinesis stuff...”

“Ooh...oh is that it? It's PSI like, PSYchokinesis, isn't it?”

“What do you mean, 'isn't it'...?” said Frank. He looked dumbfounded at first, and then he suddenly burst out laughing. “This kid's a riot. Priceless. Hey, shorty, did you just win this fight without even knowing what the hell you were doing?”

“Uhh...to tell you the truth,” said Ness, turning red, “yeah...that's what happened.”

“Is that so... That's pretty incredible,” said Frank. He stood up, wiped his hand roughly on the seat of his pants, and offered Ness a handshake. “I'm sorry I treated you so terribly. Can you forgive me?”

“Of course!” Ness replied, and he shook Frank's hand energetically. “And I'm sorry I broke something you worked so hard on.”

“It's okay. I could always just...make another one,” said Frank. Without his sunglasses on, his face seemed so terribly humble, like an older brother with a kind heart. “A long time ago, when I was about your age, I really loved Astroboy, and other robot cartoons like that. I thought one day I'd become a world-famous scientist, and build amazing robots of my own. But since my family was poor, both my father and my mother told me that I didn't need to continue school, I just needed to work hard! Go out and make some money! ...And by the time I even realized it, I'd already become a bit of a delinquent. So when you talked so seriously about the kinds of things I had only dreamed about as a kid, I got annoyed at you, I hated you, and I guess I got a little carried away, but...that stuff about a 'nasty alien', and a 'world-wide catastrophe'...is it all really true?”

“Yeah. It's all really true,” Ness replied.

“I see,” said Frank. “Pretty sweet. What a thrill! But...” Frank crossed his arms, and he thought for a moment. “Well then, I wonder if those things...those 'power spot' things, are no joke then, either.”

“Power spot things?” Ness repeated, sounding puzzled.

“Yeah,” Frank replied. “Now, I'm not into the whole 'occult' thing myself, but that guy, Mop...he's got a real knack for sensing all things paranormal, and he tells me there's one of those things here in Onett. A place called 'Giant Step'–it's just on the other side of a cave on the western side of that mountain the meteorite fell on. When I took the rest of the Sharks there to test their courage, there was some kind of glittering thing blocking the path, and for some reason, we couldn't get past it. That Mop guy, when he saw it, his eyes went all wide and he started shaking, and he said something about how that place wasn't calling to us. That it was calling to someone else. And that he had the feeling there was some kind of monster there, sucking energy up out of a 'power spot'.”

“That might be one of 'My Sanctuaries',” said Ness, and he nodded. “Thanks. I'll go check it out.”

“Oh, and...” Frank began. He narrowed his eyes gently, and he put his hand on Ness's shoulder. “Be careful. Until you get back here safe and sound, I'll be trying to convince that old King of Cops to take down those roadblocks.”

“Really?!” Ness cried.

“Sure,” said Frank. “I'm still a little annoyed, but...with a world-wide catastrophe looming, I can't just shut you up, I guess.” Frank smiled, and he looked a little embarrassed. “Ness, you've become stronger than even me–good luck out there. Go save the world for us!”

A large elm tree spread its thick branches above an unused storehouse in the lot behind the library. Up in that elm's branches was a small playhouse built out of wooden planks. This was the treehouse. It was a hideout for the mischievous young boys of Onett Junior High. After school and during summer vacation, the boys, who were all good friends, would gather there, sometimes without even planning to, and they'd play card games, work out strategies for their next baseball game, or, from time to time, even plan out elaborate pranks.

On his way up the path that led to the rocky mountain cave, Ness dropped in at the treehouse to tell his friends what was going on. To tell them about this journey to save the world no matter what. To let them know that he wasn't sure when he'd be coming back home. And to indirectly ask for their help in making sure that Tracy and his mama didn't get too lonely.

“Okay buddy, we're on it!” said the pack leader Chris, reassuringly, with a very mature look on his face. “Don't you worry. Even if the new school year starts before you get back, don't feel like you have to hurry or anything. I'm sure I can juggle school on top of everything else.”

“And when you get back, you'll have to tell us all about your adventure!” said Gordy, the aspiring novelist, with such a bright expression on his face–a face that was so pretty strangers often mistook him for a girl. “I'll write all about it, and that's how I'll make my debut!”

“Hey, how did this get so beat up? Here,” said Verne, as he swapped out his own hat for Ness's.

“Are you sure you're okay with that, Verne?” said Ness, looking very surprised. “Isn't this your favorite hat, the one you got signed by Mister?”

“It's fine, it's fine,” said Verne, as he shrugged his shoulders. “A while back, you risked your life to save me when I was being chased by that wild dog. I've been meaning to pay you back for it ever since.”

“Hey, I wanna give you something, too!” said Teddy. “Oh, I know! Here, take this.” He fished around in his pocket and pulled out something about the size of a magic marker. It was a mini Maglite, covered in camouflage patterns. “It's small, but it's really bright. It should be helpful in caves and places like that.”

“Okay, but I'm only borrowing these,” said Ness. “...I'll give them back to you someday, I promise.” Overwhelmed with emotion, he pretended to be fixing the visor on his new hat as he hurriedly tried to blink away the tears that suddenly filled his eyes. “Thanks, guys. I should head out.”

“Good luck!” cried his four friends, and they waved as they watched him go.

Ness made his way up a steep slope covered in bushes and shrubs, clinging to grass, vines, and tree roots as he went, until he found the entrance to the cave. It was a wide, round hole in the rocky mountainside. It looked just like a giant, stony creature in the middle of a deep yawn.

Ness swallowed hard, then he took out Teddy's mini Maglite and gripped it tightly. He went in.

The air inside was chilly and damp. Every rocky surface was slippery with condensation and reflected the flashlight's glow eerily. The light washed over something that glistened like the eyes of an animal, and Ness stopped in his tracks. ...But it was only an empty juice can. He wondered if those poorly-mannered Sharks had thrown it there. Ness breathed a sigh, and he picked up the litter.

He followed the path as it wound up and down, left and right, and as he went deeper and deeper, it was becoming more and more cramped. What if I got lost in a place like this? he thought, and his heart began to race...but fortunately, there seemed to be only one pathway. As he passed through an area where the ceiling was especially low, he could see some sort of light shining on the other side. Like a bubbling spring, splashes of light were spraying forth and blanketing the ground nearby.

A wonderful, beautiful, mystical radiance enveloped him. This light became a cool, purifying shower, and Ness felt a tingling sensation in his arms and legs.

He couldn't see it very well in the blinding light, but there was some kind of huge creature there, and it was speaking with its mind.

A hazy figure stepped forward, and Ness couldn't believe his eyes. It was an ant as tall as a person! Wriggling its six amber-colored legs, it leapt straight for Ness with its jaws wide open! Ness pulled out his bat in a panic, and...CHOMP! The ant bit right down on it. It was like fighting against a steam shovel!

“Uwaaugh!”

Ness stumbled, and a countless number of smaller minion ants began to crawl up his legs. In his shorts, in his shirt...they just kept coming. And their tickling feet were unbearable!

Bloorp! Some kind of acid shot out from the giant ant's behind. Ness avoided it brilliantly using skills he'd honed by dodging bad pitches, but when the acid hit a rock instead, a foul-smelling smoke began to rise from it. Ness watched in horror, his eyes blinking wildly. This was no joke. If he held back at all this time, he was done for!

“Eeeyaaah!”

With a desperate battle cry, he swung the bat. He hit a ball of acid right back at the pitcher! The giant ant was taken aback, and it writhed in pain. As it flailed its legs through the air wildly, it sent Ness's hat flying, and in a panic, he jumped to retrieve it. The mini Maglite slipped out of his hand, and just by chance, it happened to slam right into the giant ant's soft belly!

“GRAAOORR!”

As it rolled over onto its back, the giant ant began to shrink before Ness's eyes. Now it was the size of a regular ant again. With the help of all of its companions, it slunk away into a hole in the ground with an exhausted and pitiful gait.

Phew. Thank goodness, Ness thought. He retrieved the flashlight, and with a sigh of relief, he wiped the sweat from his brow.

The fountain of light disappeared without a sound, and Ness could see a hole leading to a path meandering onward. He got the feeling that something was beckoning to him from the other side.

The cave ended quite abruptly, and by the time he realized it, he was already outside of it. Under a bright blue summer sky, the wind was rustling the grass on a gentle meadow. There was a wonderful, indescribable scent in the air. And right in the middle of the meadow, there was an area of bare earth where no grass was growing, and the shape of this empty area was quite unique. This was Giant Step! It was a huge, huuuge footprint. Without knowing just what he was doing, Ness opened his backpack and pulled out the Sound stone. He squeezed it gently, then he held it up to the sun. He looked at the footprint through the gem as if it were a lens, and...FLASH! A pure, white light began to shine from it! Suddenly, he could hear a gentle, quiet melody coming from somewhere.

He did not know this song. He'd never heard it before this very moment. Yet it was still terribly nostalgic, and it felt very comforting.

For a brief moment, Ness had a vision of a small, shaggy puppy.

From somewhere within the Sound stone came seven swirling beams of light, each one a different color. The Sound stone had recorded the melody of Giant Step...!

<Ness, you did it! Congratulations!>

Paula's voice seemed somehow closer than it had been before, even though the two of them still hadn't met. He could hear her much better now, and much more clearly. <That's right, it's because you've gone up to the next level! Your PSI powers are steadily growing stronger. Now then, Ness...come on, hurry! Come to Twoson! Come and find me...!>

Ness came back down from the mountain and discovered that people from the mayor's office had been running all over town looking for him. They took him back with them to town hall. And there in the impressive and very elegant conference room was the mayor himself, the police captain, and Frank, who for some reason was wearing a very shiny uniform that looked like something straight out of a sci-fi comic. The three of them were chatting away, amiably.

“Ah, so you're this young Ness I've heard so much about,” said Mayor B.H. Pirkle, as he stood up and offered his hand for Ness to shake. “I'm sorry for summoning you so suddenly like this, but I wanted to give you my thanks in person. And I've assigned Frank here as captain of Onett's brand new Clean-Up Crew!”

“I used the parts from Frankystein Mark II and created a wicked awesome street-cleaning truck,” said Frank. Just below those sunglasses, he still had the same awkward smile as always. “It's a cutting-edge, fine-tuned, mechanical masterpiece. All the Sharks are working together, giving it all they've got to keep this place beautiful and recycle anything we can. And from now on, I'll beat up on people who litter instead of people like you, Ness.”

“Thank you for all your assistance with our clean-up operations,” said Captain Strong. “You're the town's trash—I mean treasure...our pride! A hero!”

“...And I'd love for you to give a rallying speech on my behalf during the next election cycle,” Mayor Pirkle blurted. “We've taken down the roadblocks. If you'd like to get to Twoson, I'm sure you can be escorted there in one of our patrol cars, isn't that right, Captain Strong?”

“...Or I could take you there in the new Beautifying-Super-Cleaner Frances!” said Frank.

“Thank you so much!” cried Ness.

As soon as he heard this wonderful news, he reached out using his telepathy.

<Paula, Paula can you hear me? I'm coming there now. It won't be long before I get to Twoson!>

......However...

<Paula? I'm going to meet you, soon! Isn't that wonderful?!>

...There was no response.

<What's wrong? Can't you hear me? Are you taking a nap...?>

There was still no reply.

“...That's weird,” Ness murmured.

“What's wrong, Ness?”

“You look so pale.”

Frank and the captain both tried to speak to him, but Ness was ignoring them. He had a bad feeling about this. A very bad feeling. What if something had happened to Paula...?

Spurred on by his rapidly growing anxiety, Ness began to run as fast as he could.

Chapter 3 – The Mysterious Cult

The summer grass grew thickly over the edges of the highway–a perfectly straight road, due south.

Meanwhile, as Ness kept running at a frantic pace…

“Blue, blue...”

When she heard someone calling to her, Paula opened her eyes very slightly. On the other side of the rusted metal bars, a woman with a very sickly complexion was smiling at her, gently.

“How are you feeling, little miss?” asked the woman. “You must be getting hungry.” She put her handbasket down on the floor and pulled a Tupperware container out of it. “Go on, eat up. It's food.”

Inside the container that had been handed to Paula there was warm soup, still giving off steam. The bittersweet herbs smelled delicious, but the color was very off-putting. ...It was a dazzling shade of blue. It didn't look like real food at all. The woman also pulled out some bread, which looked exactly like the copper sulfate solution Paula had once used in an experiment during science class–it was completely dyed a vivid blue.

“Thank you, but...I don't want it,” said Paula, as she smiled awkwardly and retreated a bit farther away. “I'm sorry, it's just that...I'm on a diet.”

“You shouldn't be,” said the woman, and she shook her head. “You're pretty enough already, aren't you? If you mistreat the body that God has given you, you'll have to answer for it someday. ...But, well, I do think that gaudy blonde hair of yours would look so much prettier if you dyed it blue, at least. I'll leave this here for you, so if you want to eat it later, you can.”

There was the sound of clanking keys as the woman left, and then, there in that cramped little shack, Paula was left all alone.

The shack was made out of logs, and it was terribly cold. A damp wind was blowing in through gaps in the time-worn and warped wood paneling. From somewhere outside, Paula could hear the sound of rushing water.

She touched the container holding the soup. It had a gentle warmth that soothed her numbed fingers. Her stomach growled.

But, if she were to eat it...

Paula shivered. She suddenly remembered all the very strange things she had seen.

“There's a boy here from Onett who wants to see you.”

She had gotten the phone call while she was trying to put the children down for their afternoon nap.

“Do you think you could come to Burglin Park, just for one little tiny minute?” asked the voice on the other end of the line.

Paula lived in the Polestar Preschool building. Twoson had no shortage of working women, so there were many mothers who could not devote enough time and care to their children, and so they were entrusted to the Polestar Preschool. Paula's father was the president of the school, and her mother was the principal.

Because Paula's classes were out for the summer, she was helping her parents at the preschool. She was very accustomed to this, as she had done it every year. She read picture books to the children and taught them to sing and play the organ. She could also give a perfect, model performance in their swimming classes. The lovely and charming Paula, who seemed to be able to do just about anything, had quickly become a clear favorite among the children again this year.

“Did you say a boy from Onett?!” said Paula, smiling brightly into the phone's receiver. “Wow, Ness sure travels fast. But, why wouldn't he just come here? It's not too far from Burglin Park to my house. Please, tell him how to get here.”

“Well, actually...he's been injured,” said the man on the other end of the line. He had a hoarse voice that tickled her ears. “He can't take even one step. And so, unfortunately, he needs you to come to him. If you head toward the park, I'll shout once I see you.”

“He's injured? That's awful!” cried Paula. “...Alright. I'll head there as soon as I can.”

Paula crept quietly across a floor covered in sleeping children–some of them sucking their thumbs, some of them mumbling in their sleep–so that she didn't wake them, and she left the preschool. Thanks to her stealthiness, her mother and father never got the chance to ask, “Where are you going?” or, “What time will you be back?”.

She had a bit of a strange feeling about this. If he had been injured so badly that he couldn't walk, why hadn't Ness sent out an SOS? He could have reached out to her using telepathy. And just who was the man who had called her on the phone?

Paula had never met Ness before. She knew he was an honest and brave boy. She knew he cared for his family and his friends, and displayed good sportsmanship and a strong dislike for cheaters. But, what kind of face he had, or whether he was short or tall, or who his favorite celebrity was, or his zodiac sign, or his blood type...all those details, she still didn't know yet.

Maybe...after being offered her help so many times already, Ness had become too ashamed or embarrassed to ask for any more. Or maybe he found it irritating that some girl he didn't even know very well was lecturing him snobbishly on how to do this and that. But...this was no time for her to be hesitating!

Paula frowned slightly and hurried on.

Burglin Park was a wide open lot on the southwest side of town. Handmade crafts, used goods, unique odds and ends, folk art from around the world...there were many open-air shops all in rows. It was quite a decent flea market. An accessory shop run by a young man in hippie attire, a stand of fresh eggs tended by an older woman dressed like a farmer...she glanced at each of them out of the corners of her eyes as she walked briskly past.

“You...Paula, right?” said a foreign man in a turban, as he grabbed her by the arm. “Come. This way. Mr. Everdred, waiting, over there.”

“I'll go, I'm going, just...wait, you're hurting me, let go!” Paula cried.

She struggled, unable to tell If this foreign man couldn't understand her or if he was pretending not to. But at no point did he loosen his grip at all. She was practically dragged deeper into the park, to a small shack. The man roughly shoved her inside, then slammed the door behind them.

“...You......you're...!”

Paula tried to cry out, but in an instant the foreign man held his large hand over her mouth.

In the shack there were three people. She recognized one of them.

The man had a sloppy appearance, and looked something like a low-quality photocopy of Jesus Christ. His name was Carpainter. It was said that he was the leader of the Happy Happyists, a new religious cult that had suddenly appeared on the outskirts of Twoson. When he had heard the rumors about Paula's strange powers, he came around many, many times trying to recruit her as his own personal channeler. In recent days, if her father and mother, who were highly offended by the repeated invitations to join some suspicious cult, found themselves even accidentally using the word “happy” in their everyday conversations, they would immediately panic and sanctify the house with sprinklings of salt.

As for the other two, one was a young man with a small build who had shaggy hair and a scraggly mustache and was wearing round, black sunglasses. The other was a fat and uncomfortably pale young boy.

That isn't Ness...! Paula realized, instantly. This boy is...someone else. His heart is so strangely twisted...it doesn't shine the way I know Ness's heart does!

“It was surprisingly easy to trick you,” the fat boy said, with a mocking smile. “But, Paula, Mr. Everdred wasn't lying. I am, in fact, a boy who came from Onett, and...look, look here. Right here on my knee. I tripped and fell, and I did get a little scrape!”

“Mmmmfff...!” Paula cried, her voice muffled by the foreign man's hand. She was trying to say, “Who are you?”, and they seemed to understand what she meant.

“This here is the great Pokey Minch,” said Guru Carpainter, in a way that seemed almost reverent. “He is the new hope of our Happy Happyists. He finally found what we've been needing, what we've been searching for all this time, that most sacred golden statue, and he brought it to us. ...And now, Paula, adorable Paula, once you take up your calling as our living goddess, everything will be complete. Everything will be so much happier, so incredibly happy, once everything in the world becomes blue!”

“No hard feelings, little miss,” said the younger man with the reggae vibes as he rubbed his hands together. “The name's Everdred–I'm the boss of Burglin Park. Properly tending to my customers' needs is my most sacred duty. And these fine gentlemen here, they promised that if I could lure you to this shack with no complications, they'd pay me a thousand bucks.”

“Ah, that's right–here's your money,” said Carpainter, as he took a roll of bills from his inside coat pocket and tossed it over.

“Thank you, thank you!” said Everdred. “Well then, if that's all you'll be needing from me...” With one last meaningful look, he was gone in a flash.

“Now then, my darling Paula,” said Carpainter. “If you don't want this to be an unpleasant experience for you, please be a good girl, just for a little while.”

Now that he had placed a gag in her mouth, bound her hands and feet, and lifted her into his car like a piece of luggage, there was no longer any room for doubt–she was being kidnapped. Paula wasn't afraid, but she was angry, oh so angry, and she couldn't collect her own thoughts. She was ashamed of herself for falling into such an obvious trap.

Happily (Get the salt! The salt!), since he hadn't blindfolded her, as the car left town and traveled through Peaceful Rest Valley, she could see that they were headed into the nearby mountains which were currently being developed for housing. Steadily they climbed that winding mountain trail, until at last she saw a sign by the side of the road.

This plot of land, left abandoned halfway through development by a real estate agent who had lost his funding, had been bought for a very low price by that strange cult, which was now gathering followers with the intent that they would all live here together. Just beyond the newly built homes that had popped up here and there was a wide, sprawling field of bluegrass, which in this case means grass that is literally blue–not the bluegrass you may know, which is typically green. The cows, the horses, the clothing on the people out working, and even their complexions...all of them were blue. Paula was beginning to feel uneasy. Everything here looked like the screen of a television whose color balance had gone bad, or like a drawing made by a child who had used up every other crayon and had no choice but to color every part of a landscape blue.

Finally the car arrived at a building that was painted an especially vivid shade of turquoise.

“First, let me show you something wonderful,” said Guru Carpainter. He stroked Paula's cheek with his icy cold fingers, then he removed the gag from her mouth. “I'm sure, in time, you'll be happy to live here with all of us.”

The building appeared to be something like a church for the cult. Inside, it was about the size of a school gymnasium, and a large crowd of believers had gathered there. They were wearing pointed hats that covered them entirely from their heads down to their shoulders, with only the space around their eyes cut out. Their faces were completely hidden from view. Their bodies were shrouded in baggy robes, which covered everything except for the very tips of their fingers and toes. It was impossible to tell the men from the women, or the old from the young. Every one of them was wearing the same ghastly shade of blue, and they were each facing in their own direction as they crouched in place or sat on the floor, slowly swaying back and forth. Rising and falling like the roar of the ocean, they were mumbling and muttering a song of prayer that Paula couldn't understand at all. But every once in a while, as if they had been overcome with emotion, all at once they would cry out, “BLUE, BLUE!” so loudly that it would echo deep in her ears.

Carpainter and his crew grabbed the stumbling Paula and led her to an altar farther inside.

“No...stop it...! I don't want to go!” she shrieked loudly, but none of them even flinched. The room was crammed full of people, but not a single one of them showed any concern for Paula, who was clearly in distress and protesting in her loudest voice. They just kept on singing that song of prayer that seemed to make them so drowsy, and they continued swaying.

At the top of three sets of stairs that had a small handrail, there was a large shrine on display. This shrine was a bit like a cabinet, with two doors that met in the middle. It was the kind of thing one might use to store items of worship. The moment they stepped in front of those doors, which had crude religious imagery painted across them, some strange force bore down on Paula very suddenly and very heavily. She felt a sensation like sharp claws gripping her shoulders tightly. The air became thick, and it began to whirl around her. Her hair stood on end, and a chill ran down her spine. This was the first time since her abduction that she had known true fear.

There was something, some unbelievably avaricious thing, behind that door. Something with an insatiable hunger. Some enormous nightmare. A thing that was like a black hole that would drag in the soul of anyone who came near enough to it.

Suddenly Carpainter, the foreign man, and the many believers who blanketed the floor all had spellbound, intoxicated looks on their faces. That chubby kid, apparently named Pokey, was the only one whose grinning face remained completely the same as he took hold of the knobs on the cabinet doors with both hands.

“...You can't!” Paula cried. “Don't...please, don't open it!”

“You don't have to shout like that,” said Pokey. “I just want to show it to you, that's all!” Sneering at her over his shoulder, Pokey pulled the doors open resolutely.

A golden light pierced straight through her tightly closed eyelids. The pressure from its radiance forced her eyes to open.

Oh, whaaat? That thing isn't blue! Paula thought, and for a moment she was able to make light of her situation. There before her was a surprisingly small, exotic, spooky-looking gold sculpture. The instant she had taken in the full sight of it, Paula suddenly began to float in mid-air. Well, actually, she knew she was still standing on solid ground, but it seemed as though everything–the floor beneath her feet, the building she had just been in, all of it–had disappeared, and she felt as if she'd been ejected into the very middle of the boundless, wide open reaches of outer space.

In the blink of an eye, she began to grow smaller. Bit by bit, she was shrinking. Conversely, the gold figure that stood in mid-air before her began to grow rapidly larger, and soon it loomed intimidatingly above her. Paula was now the size of a sesame seed, and the statue's nostrils suddenly inhaled sharply. It was trying to suck her in...swallow her...take her as its own.

“...NOOOOOOOO!” she screamed, in protest.

She cried out with all her heart. She braced herself defiantly. There was a loud ZZAPP!, as if there had been a burst of electricity, and everything around her was bathed in a bright white light that was beyond dazzling. Then...it all seemed to melt away.

When she regained consciousness, Paula found herself a prisoner in this small, worn-down shack.

Even though the summer days were nice and warm at the base of the mountain, it was surprisingly cool here, possibly because of the higher elevation. Her back was damp with a cold sweat and she felt terrible, as if she might soon catch a chill. Her mind seemed clouded and hazy, and she had a hard time focusing her eyes. She felt as if she'd just gone through a session of arduous long-distance swimming, or like she did after she had once gone to the dentist and gotten a shot of anesthesia. Her whole body was tired and heavy, her joints were aching, and she had no energy at all.

This is bad, Paula thought to herself. I'm lucky I'm still in one piece–for now anyway. But, what will happen next? ...How many times will I have to endure something like that? ...And what if they start using more force to try to get me to do what they want?

That bright blue soup was starting to look awfully delicious. It would probably warm her up a bit. But if she ate it, she knew that might be the end for her. It might put her mind more at ease and make her careless. If she surrendered to this one thing, it would become easier for her to give in to the next thing. Her resolution wouldn't be as strong anymore. She would lose her spirit, like all those other followers out there, and be dyed blue...and then she'd do just as Carpainter and that golden figure told her to.

But...it looked so warm, and it smelled so good.

She held the container with both hands, and without a thought, she began to pull it closer to her face. Her hands were shivering, and a few drops of soup fell onto her fingers. Slowly, its warmth was spreading through her. The herb-scented steam was gently rising. Blue is...blue is...such a wonderful color, isn't it...?

<...la! Paula, where are you?! Where did you go?! Where are you...?!>

Paula looked up with a start. Suddenly she threw the entire soup container out through the bars. She tossed away the bread, too. She hated the idea of wasting food, but if she had left it within her reach, she might have faltered and been tempted by it again.

<I'm here! Ness...I'm here!> She tightly balled both of her numbed hands into fists and concentrated with her whole heart. <I'm in a shack up on a mountain, somewhere near running water. ...Hurry, hurry...please help me!>

“You said there's a pencil blocking the road?”

“Yeah, that's right,” Ness replied. “The bridge is broken, and that road's the only other way to get through. But I heard Paula calling to me, and it definitely came from that direction!”

“Is that so...” Kid mumbled.

Apple Kid appeared to be about fifty percent chubbier than Pokey.

While running throughout town gathering information, Ness had found Kid's house by chance. When Ness saw him lying there on the floor, his heart pounded wildly, thinking that he might be dead. But actually, it seemed that Kid had only gotten lost in his thoughts and had forgotten to eat. Ness had given him a Ness Burger Deluxe he happened to have with him. But, it was his last one...the last precious item left in the lunch box his mother had packed for him.

While Kid ate the burger in a bit of a daze, Ness told him everything. He had rushed to Twoson after being called here by the mysterious voice of a girl who introduced herself as Paula. However, by the time he made it to the preschool, he found out she had already gone missing. While Paula's father was so overwhelmed by worry and uneasiness that he couldn't figure out whether he wanted to sit or to stand, her mother smiled brightly and said things like, “That child has God on her side, so I know she'll be okay”.

“Her mom sure stays calm under pressure,” said Kid, as he neatly and thoroughly licked some of that special sauce from his fingers. “Well now, I feel completely restored! That authentic Ness Burger was really, really good!”

“Hey, hey, wait...what about that metal pencil thing? We've never seen anything like that before!” There was a high-pitched, squeaking voice coming from the floor. “It was probably put there to make fools of us. There's no mistaking it, that's gotta be the invention of a mad scientist out to take over the world!”

“It's a mouse!” cried Ness, as he leapt to his feet. “...A talking mouse!”

“Hmph. I'm not just a mouse. I'm the amazing Algernon, mouse genius,” said the tiny gray mouse, as he grabbed the ends of the little red bow tie he wore around his neck and straightened them. “It's thanks to my friend Apple Kid, the brilliant young inventor, and his Rodent-Intelligence-Amplifier-Device, that I can talk to you like this.”

“Young inventor?” said Ness. “You mean this...er, slightly overweight-looking guy here?”

“That's right!” Algernon replied, holding his head even higher. “And like I was saying before...hey, we have to do something, Kid! We have to take down that awful rival of yours, and we have to find a way to pay Ness back for lunch, too!”

“One way or another, yeah,” Kid replied. He wiped his chubby mouth with both sleeves, one after the other, while he thought things over. “I want to help you out with your problem in those mountains. If I could just see the actual thing in person, I'd be better able to figure out what it's made of, and then maybe I could come up with a probable solution...but there's no way I'm going mountain-climbing or anything like that, myself. ...Oh, I know, I'll give you that thing! It should do the trick.”

Kid dug around here, rustled about there, all throughout that terribly cluttered house of his. After a very thorough search, he finally came back with a machine small enough to fit into the palm of his hand.

“It's a Specific-Predetermined-Particular-Shape-Annihilation-Device,” Kid proclaimed. He opened the cover of the machine, fiddled a bit with the internal wiring, and swapped out some of its parts. “I made it with very little planning ahead, but...there. I did it. I just turned it into a Pencil Eraser! Wood, iron, or even diamond...no matter what a thing is made of, as long as it has the shape of a pencil, this device will destroy it on a molecular level.”

“...Can it really do that?” asked Ness, as he took the machine and looked it over carefully. It looked like a piece of junk–like someone had melted together a remote control, the face of an alarm clock, and a toy ray gun. It was sunken in on one side, bulging out on the other, and there was a crack in it that was being held together with packing tape. If Ness had found it lying on the ground, it was the kind of item he would immediately feel compelled to throw into the nearest trash bin. “I mean, it doesn't really look like it could...”

After all...the enormous Apple Kid himself, who looked so much like an out-of-shape sumo wrestler and had such a soft, pudgy baby-face, didn't appear as though he could possibly be the type to possess the sort of brain that could create such an outrageous invention. His clothes were dirty all over, and his room was so messy and disorganized that Ness's mother would have gone into a fit of hysterics if she were to see it. He was terribly untidy.

“Put your faith in Kid, and he'll never let you down!” Algernon reassured him. “The amazing Algernon, mouse genius, guarantees it! You just have to believe in him!”

“Alright...I understand!” said Ness, nodding earnestly. It felt somewhat strange to be given a pep talk by such a tiny creature. “Well then, I'll take it with me. Thank you so much! Once I rescue Paula, I won't forget to come back and say thank you again!”

“Say hi to Paula for me,” said Kid, as he smiled warmly. “A long time ago, I went to that preschool she lives in. She was only a baby back then, but she was already very pretty.”

“...O-oh,” said Ness, trying to speak casually, but his cheeks had turned a little red. “Is that right? Paula...she's cute?”

“No doubt she'll be known as Miss Twoson, someday,” Kid vouched for her, coolly. “Maybe even Miss Eagleland. Miss Planet Earth I can't guarantee, though.”

“Lucky you, Ness!” Algernon teased. “You'd have to go rescue her either way, but it's better if she's a cute girl than a not-so-cute girl, right?”

Blue horses leapt across a blue sky while blue cows grazed on blue grass. Beyond the rows of blue houses, gently sloping blue mountains could be seen with a river coursing through them like a blue ribbon, weaving its way between the trees of a blue forest and glittering with blue sparkles.

“...It's marvelous,” whispered the cult leader, in his shabby blue robe. He put his hand to his heart as though he had been suddenly overcome with emotion. “What do you think, Pokey? My village, oh my...it's so beautiful, isn't it? Blue is such a refreshing color, so pure, so profound!”

“To each his own, I guess,” Pokey replied. The chubby young boy was lying back on a couch with his legs crossed at the knee, and he spoke with an indifferent tone as he picked dirt out from under his fingernails. “A long time ago, there was a man who was very happy to let us all know that the world was indeed blue. Well, I guess blue isn't a terrible choice. If everything were yellow instead, as far as the eye could see, it'd be way too bright during the day.”

“...Pokey,” Carpainter began, as he stood by the window. He turned around, and he spoke with a compassionate look in his eyes. “Every now and then...you...you tend to...to speak and act in ways that are not at all like a typical child. If possible, I wish you'd try to refrain from such uncouth behavior. You are a future community leader in our organization, after all.”

“Hmph,” Pokey huffed, as he rolled his shoulder. “And just who was it that made all this greatness even possible for you, again? You didn't forget your promise, did you?”

“I haven't forgotten,” said the cult leader, with a scowl. “Sixty six point six percent of any profits the Happy Happyists bring in belongs to you, for as long as our group exists. ...We've suddenly been taking in a lot of new followers. All of them contributed every single thing they own, every last asset, and they continue to work hard, fully devoted to the cause. And it's all thanks to that golden figure, the Mani Mani statue, which we finally possess. So even with you taking the lion's share, our organization is still far better off than it has ever been. So, if it's alright with you, I'd like to know...why would a kid like you need this kind of money? What do you plan to do with a fortune such as this?”

“It's a game,” said Pokey. “It's nothing but a game to me.” His eyes, so small and indifferent, stared off into the distance. “It's like I'm finally awake. I want to know just how much I can do, and see just how far I can go. Money is a definitive figure...a great way to calculate exactly what you're capable of.”

The cult leader remained silent, and Pokey stood up as if he'd suddenly come to his senses.

“I'm leaving,” he said.

“Where are you going?”

“Wherever I feel like,” Pokey replied bluntly, and then, without even a glance at the cult leader, he left.

Carpainter breathed a heavy sigh, then he walked over to where Pokey had been sitting. He brushed his hand across the wrinkled sofa cover and made it smooth again.

The room could easily be described as so plain that it was depressing. Someone had once discarded the large office desk for having a broken leg, but Carpainter had taken it in, repaired it, and painted it a lovely blue color. And because each chair had been acquired from either the bazaar or the dump, they were all in different shapes and sizes. The curtains, the mat on the floor, and the sofa cover were all quilts, crafted by women in their community who almost seemed to have been competing with one another as they stitched away.

“One for all, and all for one!”

“Everybody needs love!”

“May the whole world be turned blue!”

On the wall were the organization's slogans, scrawled in messy writing and hung in picture frames.

The cult leader closed his eyes and was very still, and he seemed to be flooded with sorrow. When he was a boy, this leader had been very thin, sickly, and terribly awkward. He'd had no chance at proving himself in school. And on top of everything else, as a side effect of the medication he had to take daily, his face had turned a zombie-like blue color. Because of his strange appearance, he was always alone. His desire for friends with whom he could bond had been unbearable. But, he'd had no idea how he could become the kind of person that other people would want to be around.

To cope with and express his painful emotions, the cult leader had become a painter. People began to come to him, people who could see the hope and the empathy in his artwork, which he had painted using various shades of blue. It turned out that he was not the only one who was so lonely. There were people who were troubled, people who were lost, people who were shy, or who couldn't seem to make any friends...and these people desired to live together and help one another. With that hope in mind, he gave it everything he had and worked to buy this plot of land here in the valley, so far from the rest of civilization. He had built Happy Happy Village so that there could be a place where everyone who wanted to join in would feel welcomed, a place where they could peacefully support one another without any outsiders feeling threatened. His dream was to cover not simply a cramped canvas, but the very earth and the air itself in beautiful blue. Before he even realized it, the people had begun to call him their leader, their guru.

But...

Something had changed. Things were different now. Somewhere along the way, everything began to shift out of alignment.

A single tear fell from his blue-gray eyes. The cult leader buried his face in his hands.

“...Are you Mister Carpainter?”

The cult leader looked up with a start. A boy, wearing a red baseball cap and resting a bat against his shoulder, was standing in the doorway.

“Who are you?” the cult leader asked, sullenly. He hated athletic-types. They tended to be violent and crude, and had no difficulty winning everyone's favor, but even worse than that, they were often so thick-headed that they didn't even appreciate how easy they had it. “You're not one of my followers. How did you even get here?”

“I'm Ness. I came here from Onett. I'm a friend of Paula's, the girl you kidnapped. Please, let Paula go!”

Ness spoke clearly, and without a hint of cowardice. He looked straight into Carpainter's eyes. The cult leader began to lose his cool. The absolute nerve of this cocky, snot-nosed little brat!

“I have no idea what you're talking about,” said Carpainter. “Go on home! You're interfering with my meditation!”

“I don't want to use violence,” the boy began, as he lowered the bat from his shoulder, “but we don't have much time. If asking with words isn't enough, I will fight you.”

“Did you say fight?” Carpainter replied, as blood rushed to his face, turning it an eerie purple color. “Do you not know your place, you little brat?! Do you think it's okay to disobey an adult?”

“I don't want to disobey an adult unless I have to,” said Ness. “But even adults can be wrong, sometimes.”

“You always have to have the last word, don't you, kid?” growled Carpainter. “You talk big, but I'll show you!”

The cult leader braced his legs, hunched his back, and steadied his breathing as he concentrated all of his energy. Bluish-purple sparks flashed across his hands and over his clothes, and his flattened hair began to stand on end and writhe like a wild animal. Ness gripped his bat and braced himself for a fight, but the cult leader only smiled. That golden figure seemed to glow with a faint, cold light, and there was a sense that it was beginning to take hold of Carpainter. It was pulsing, it was swelling, and it seemed to be flooding the cult leader's body with an intensely brilliant light. And then, finally, when that overwhelming power had filled his small body to the bursting point, it began to overflow. It was unleashed, and it was lashing out! “This is...the power of Mani Mani...!”

From both of Carpainter's outstretched hands came blinding bolts of lightning!

“UWAAAAAAAAUGH!”

At the very center of this bright flash of light, there was the silhouette of a screaming boy, all four of his limbs stiff and rigid. And just as it seemed the boy would be torn to pieces...he suddenly disappeared. All that was left behind was the scent of something burning in the air.

“...Little fool,” the cult leader murmured with a slight smile, as he slumped to his knees. Having used up all of his strength, his body looked like a limp and soggy dish rag. The image of that golden figure vanished into thin air with a satisfied flash of light, and the cult leader's heart suddenly felt so terribly empty. Like that neatly-swept house mentioned in the Bible...that room which is so easy for both devils and angels to enter. The cult leader muttered “Blue, blue...” as he closed his eyes, and then he fell deeply into the quiet salvation that sleep can bring.

In a place that was nowhere, and in a time that never was, Ness drifted slowly along, curled up like an infant with his hands around his knees. This vast darkness was very warm and comforting. With a thump, and the force of just one heartbeat, Ness began to spin. Round and round. Over and over. His own momentum would keep him spinning, forever. Round and round he went, here. Over and over he went, there. It was so pleasant. So fun. Ness giggled.

And then...

<Ness! Ness! Get a hold of yourself!>

...There was a voice, calling out to him.

“Oh!” Ness cried. The sound of his own voice startled him, and his eyes snapped wide open. He was lying on the ground somewhere deep in the mountains. Looking across the rocky earth, which was quite near the tip of his nose, he could see a clear, babbling brook. Ness stood up, staggering, and he dipped his hands into the water. It was so cold that it stung his skin, and he vigorously rubbed it over his face. With a small cry, he shook his head wildly, just like his dog King might have done.

“I'm not dead,” he mumbled, as if to reassure himself. “I'm still alive...but, I was careless. I wasn't expecting such a cowardly-looking man to use a powerful technique like that. ...I wonder what the heck even just happened. How did I end up in a place like this?”

“Paula!” cried Ness, as he leapt to his feet. “Paula, is that you? You sound so close! Where are you?!”

<I'm inside a tiny log cabin,> came Paula's telepathic reply. <It's near water!>

Ness looked all around, then he ran up an embankment where the grass was wild and overgrown. He was in a desolate forest, shrouded by a thin, milky fog. There were green trees and shrubs. Red and yellow fruits. Pink flowers, wet with dew. Happily, it seemed as though that “blue, blue” stuff hadn't reached all the way out here, yet. He kept moving forward, pushing aside the dense, thick underbrush, until eventually he came to a path.

<I'm over here!> said Paula's voice, in his mind. <You're close. You're definitely getting closer!>

“Yeah, I'm close,” Ness replied. “Just hang on, I'll be there soon!”

Three minutes later he found the little shack, squatting there on the mountainside. He broke into a run, and then he kept running on and on until he reached it. He saw the warped floorboards. The iron bars splitting the little room in half. And standing there on the other side of those iron bars, clutching them tight, he saw a girl with her eyes open wide.

The two of them met at last.

“...Ness?”

“You're Paula, aren't you?!”

They ran over to one another. They couldn't help but to hold each other's hands through the bars. Ness stared at Paula without blinking. It was just as everyone had said. She was quite a beautiful girl. She looked just like Tracy's favorite Barbie doll, only a little younger. Her cheeks were the color of a white peach, and her eyes were a shade of violet. Her long, thick, and very distinct eyelashes fluttered repeatedly, as if in surprise. And her hair, like gathered rays of the sun, fell to about her shoulders in long, bouncy curls.

“Heh-hee!” Paula smiled. It seemed she couldn't keep herself from giggling. “Hehehehehe... So you're Ness! My friend, Ness!”

“I am!” Ness replied, and he tried to nod earnestly, but just as he did, he couldn't help himself, and an embarrassed laugh, a little ah-ha! slipped out. “I'm so glad. Finally...I finally met you, Paula!”

“Hehehehehe...!”

“Aah-hahahahaha!”

Their sudden relief turned into fits of laughter, which bounced back and forth between them like a ping pong ball. They were so happy and carefree that they poked one another with their elbows, gripped each other's hands tightly, and for a short while, just gave in to their laughing fits. But they couldn't stand there reveling in their joy, forever. Ness laughed for a while, then tried his best to put on a very serious face.

“Well then, let's go,” he said, encouragingly. “At least, let's get out of here, anyway.”

“I can't,” said Paula, stifling her laughter, too. “Look at this giant padlock, here.”

On one section of the iron bars, wrapped around the part that appeared to be the door, there was a big, fat, chain. And linking the ends of the chain together was a very heavy-looking, old-fashioned padlock, the kind one might expect a pirate to use when guarding his treasure, and it was secured very tightly.

“Do you think we can get it open?” asked Ness. “Maybe we should try to break it.”

“I don't think that's possible,” Paula replied. “But Carpainter should have the key.”

“You mean the cult leader guy?” said Ness, as his face clouded over. “That guy was surprisingly tough. He almost killed me! I still don't really know how I got away. ...Speaking of which, Paula, what did you say you thought it was?”

“Teleportation,” Paula replied. “I think that's probably one of your powers that are still dormant. Since you were so close to dying, maybe without even realizing it, without even being conscious of it, you panicked, and in such a dire situation, you were able to call forth a PSI power you still haven't mastered on your own?”

“I guess so,” said Ness. “But...well, what should I do? How am I supposed to go up against a powerful lightning attack like that?”

“A lightning attack, hmm,” Paula repeated, as she put her hand to her cheek and thought it over. “Lightning...thunder...maybe...just maybe......I got it!” She unfastened a badge that had been pinned to her chest. She handed it over to Ness.

“What's this?” he asked. “An old president's...medal?” Ness shook his head. “I'm sorry, but I don't think something like this would be enough to bribe that cult leader.”

“It's not just any president. It's president Franklin!” said Paula, and she stuck her chin up into the air with a huff. “Think about the name. Don't you think it would be resistant to lightning?”

“Oh, like the guy who did those experiments with the kite?” Ness replied. “That Franklin? I always thought those were two different people.”

“They are, but they have the same name,” said Paula. She took Ness's hand as he held the badge, and she gripped it tightly. “Look, Ness, there are still so many, many mysteries humans haven't quite figured out yet. Like the PSI powers both you and I have. Monsters and mysterious ancient civilizations...they aren't all just fiction. In all those books and legends, there are truths mixed in, hiding in plain sight. And as any decent witch or sorcerer knows...there are hidden powers within a name.”

“Hidden...powers...?” Ness replied, puzzled.

“It wasn't just a coincidence that I happened to be wearing that badge,” said Paula. “It's because you and I are warriors, and we must save this earth. And I know that the earth is trying to guide us! If you add your courage on top of the earth's guidance and the name Franklin...well, I'm sure we'll win. There's no way we can lose! You just have to believe in it, Ness. Belief is its own kind of power!”

“Hmm...I still don't quite get it,” said Ness, “but, for some reason, I feel like you're right. And so I'll borrow this, and I'll go try to take that guy down one more time!”

“And I'll be waiting,” said Paula. She let go of Ness's hand and took a small step back. “I'll be okay, don't worry. I'll wait for you, no matter how long it takes. Because...I believe in you.”

“Yeah.”

Ness pinned the badge to his shirt, and he looked back at Paula. She was a very pretty, very cute girl who never cowered even at a time like this, and who managed to stay calm and keep her thoughts collected. A cherished friend. And this girl had said that she believed in him! A trinity of courage, pride, and joy swelled in his heart.

“Alright,” he said. “Here I go! I'll be back soon, so just hang in there a little longer!”

“And now, finally,” said a woman, speaking into a microphone with a haughty and affected voice as she presided over their meeting. Blue eyes, blue lips, blue nails...and of course, her hair was also dyed a lovely blue color. “We will announce the winner of this week's Spiritual Grand Prize!”

An excited “Ooooh!” rose from the throng of Happy Happyists filling the church's stadium-style seats. Each believer wore matching blue robes, so the crowd looked like a billowing sea. Down on the stage, Carpainter raised his hands in response. Behind him was that eerie shrine, with its doors bathed in ample blue-hued light, glimmering ominously.

“First, our second runner-up...John, from Nuri village, for the successful release of three hundred and four beautiful blue rat snakes all throughout the community. Everyone, please give him a big round of applause.”

One small droplet of blue in all those blue waves stood up and removed his pointed hat, and a good-natured, if sunburned, face peeked out. Remarkable! Well done!...the crowd exclaimed, and, bowing and saying his thank-you's, he sat right back down again, looking very shy.

“Now, our first runner-up...Anego, of Origo Island! For the wonderful achievement of finding about fifty poor, lost little lambs who had not yet known of our Blue Blue Teachings, and lashing them into submission one by one with a whip of love, leaving them covered in countless blue bruises!”

A slender blue shadow climbed up onto a specially prepared platform, and with a flash, their blue cloak was cast aside. Dressed in fashionable blue leather bondage and fluttering a feathery fan, they performed a magnificent dance. There was even stronger applause this time, and the sound of stomping feet and high-pitched whistling.

“And now, this week's Spiritual Grand prize goes to...” The lights went dim. Ratatatatatatat! There was a suspenseful drum roll while spotlights whirled around in a dizzying way, seeming to search through the audience. “Mister Chin, of Briha village, who rewired all of the traffic lights in town to shine only in blue! Such an act of devotion truly embodies our creed, 'May the whole world be turned blue'! Thank you, and, congratulations!”

Oooohhh! That's amazing! How wonderful!

There was uproarious fanfare. Thunderous applause. The spotlights all gathered upon one elderly man in blue sunglasses and a blue Hawaiian shirt, who, for some reason, was carrying a blue skateboard under his arm. He raised his hands as if to say, “Thank you, thank you!”, and then climbed up onto the stage. He stood before the cult leader, who put his arms out to the side to indicate that he wanted the audience's attention.

The assembly suddenly fell completely silent.

“A certificate of commendation is in order,” Guru Carpainter began, raising his voice, “for the wonderful Mister Chin. In recognition of an act of outstanding creativity and courage, and as a testament to your unparalleled, admirable devotion. Furthermore, we would like to bestow upon you a great honor, this Supreme Believer Blue Ribbon, and as a bonus prize, we would like to offer you one of our log homes here in Happy Happy Village!”

The old man stood proudly and reached up to receive his certificate. The cult leader smiled warmly as he held it out to him. And then...

“Wait!”

“Huh?”

...Whoosh! One of the spotlights suddenly turned and shone directly into the cult leader's eyes.

“Everyone, please listen to me!” bellowed an imposing voice. From where? ...Where? And who was it? The believers looked all around in confusion. There was a muffled groan as someone clad all in blue fell with a thud from the hijacked spotlight operation booth. An agile shadow jumped down after them, and the other spotlights all followed this shadow frantically. It was a young boy, and...oh my! What a bright red baseball cap he had on!

“Please, everyone, come to your senses, now!” the boy cried. “Don't let yourselves be fooled. This guy is a terrible man who locked a little girl in a cage! He is under the evil influence of a monster that is trying to take over the world! You shouldn't be following a man like this!”

“You...” growled Carpainter. Without even realizing what he was doing, the cult leader crumpled the certificate clutched tightly in his hand, and the old man standing beside him let out a sorrowful little moan. “You cocky little brat...you're still alive?!”

“Obviously!” said Ness...er, well, I'm sure you knew it was Ness, of course! He stood in the middle of the crowd of bewildered believers, his chest puffed out with pride. “...Because justice always wins in the end!”

“Quite a happy little bastard, for someone rushing so willingly toward his own doom,” said Carpainter. The cult leader flashed a terrifying smile, then rushed over to the shrine just behind him and grabbed both knobs on the doors. “This time I won't go so easy on you. This time, our revered god, the Evil Mani Mani, will subject you to its Super Aura!”

WHAM! He tore open the doors so violently that they shattered. The blue beams from all the gathered spotlights reflected off of the golden figure with a glare so bright it was blinding. It was a gorgeous, brilliant, radiating bundle of light!

With this at his back, Guru Carpainter looked just like a peacock, with fanned-out tail feathers made of pure, eerie light. Suddenly the pained cries of all of his followers began to echo throughout the church. The dazzling light was so powerful and so bright that all of them fell to the ground as if they had been struck.

“You're a coward, Carpainter!” Ness barked. He had swiftly pulled the brim of his hat down over his eyes and squinted tightly just as the shrine doors had been thrown open, so he hadn't been as affected by that shocking flash of light. The believers all around him had fallen to the ground and were writhing and struggling and trying desperately to get away, so his body was being jostled all over. ...To imagine what this was like, picture yourself trying to stand still on the stairs in a train station during rush hour! “Don't involve your followers in all this!”

“Ga-ha, ga-hahahahaha! You can babble all you want!” cried the cult leader. His face, tinted by that blue light, looked just like a demon's, and no longer bore any resemblance to the kind and timid spiritual leader he had once been. “...But I have no tolerance for those who defy me. I am the Great Leader, and I am unequaled. Soon, everything in the world will be blue, and all of it, every last bit, will be mine! Heh, heh, heh...AH-hahaha! How amusing...what an incredible feeling! Everyone, all of you, kneel at my feet! I am powerful. I am supreme!”

“Oh, Great Leader...our beloved Leader!” muttered a woman at Ness's side who had dark circles under her tear-filled eyes. “I will obey you. I will follow you, wherever you go!”

“Everything will become blue!” spat a burly man who looked like a lumberjack. “Blue is amazing, it's so beautiful! In a blue world, everyone will get along and be happy!”

“Heh-heh-heh, there now, do you see? That is my power,” said Carpainter. The cult leader was getting cockier, and he shone with an ever brighter blue radiance. “Auughh, I feel so eager! So full of desire! I can do more. I can go further. This is too much power, it's about to overflow...! Aaah, I've had enough, this is almost a burden! ...So now, all of you shall immerse yourselves in this ultimate Blue Power! You shall go to Mani Mani heaven! After all, I can always gather this many followers again. Ahh, ahh, let's go...! Here we go! Eeurggh...Mani Mani!”

“Yaaaahh!”

“Uwaauugh, mommyyy!”

“It's too much! Glug-glug!”

A heavy wave of Happy Blue swallowed up the cowering believers! Some of them were overcome by euphoria as convulsions twitched through their bodies, and some just screamed in terror with their eyes open wide. Then, a giant bolt of lightning tore through the air! ...But......

FLASH!⭐

“GYYAAAAAAAHHH!”

In that moment, the few believers who felt brave enough to keep their eyes open looked on. They looked on as the boy with the bright red hat stood stock still and never wavered in the face of that tremendous blue torrent. They looked on as he spread out his arms as if to protect the believers who were closest to him, and as he puffed out his chest and took the full impact of that lightning bolt. They looked on as he was struck by that wild spear of light their leader had hurled his way, and as it hit, they wondered if he could possibly withstand such a heavy shock ...But in that moment, the small, silver, coin-like badge pinned to his chest instantly deflected it all. …And there on the stage, their Great Leader was hit by his own lightning strike! As if he'd been put through an X-ray machine, his entire skeleton became visible under his skin. And then there was a great, blue explosion...!

All at once, the glass in all the windows and light bulbs shattered, and jagged cracks began to spread across the walls of the assembly hall. Peeling plaster and splintered scraps of wood showered down on the cult's followers like a cold, quiet rain. That stagnant, oppressive, unpleasant blue was beginning to dissolve and disappear from the air around them. Suddenly the atmosphere became refreshing and clear, and after a moment of silence, one by one, the followers began to sit up, slowly, and raise their heads.

And they all looked on. They looked on as the faint, orange-colored rays of that tender, natural sun softly shone down upon the altar, where the figure of a small boy was gently helping their leader, who had fallen face-down, to sit up.

“...Ohh,” moaned Carpainter, as he weakly opened his eyes. “Oof...ouch...what just happened? ...I feel like something just flew out of me. The whole world has suddenly become so clear again. For a long, long time, I've been in so much terrible pain. I felt like I was on the verge of suffocation. Like I was trapped in a sticky, blue swamp.”

“You were being influenced by Giygas' powers,” said Ness, as he lent Carpainter his strength and tried to help him up.

“It was that golden figure,” said Carpainter. He turned to look at the shrine, which had been badly scorched by the lightning strike, and he shuddered. “I coveted it, I wanted it so badly that it was unbearable. But then, once I got it, something went very wrong. I only remember being so terribly confused every now and then. I don't even know exactly what I've been doing all this time. I don't know what to do, I'm just...I'm so sorry, everyone.”

“It's alright,” said Ness. “Look.”

As Ness stepped to the side, the cult leader could see all of his followers bustling about and working hard throughout the cracked and crumbling assembly hall. Every one of them had tossed aside those depressing gowns and were showing off their bright and cheerful faces. They were caring for the wounded and tidying up all the rubble. They spoke to one another gently, just happy to know that everyone was alright.

The eyes of the dazed cult leader met those of the old man in the Hawaiian shirt who was still up on the stage, and the old man flashed him a friendly grin with a few missing teeth.

“Had a bad dream, did you?” the old man said. “We all did, I think. But...Great Leader, the ideals you had, about us all living together in peace and harmony–those ideals weren't wrong. Don't give up on this place. If everyone works together like we did before, I have no doubt that this time we can build a really, truly happy village.”

“...Mister Chin,” Carpainter began. He tried to wipe his tear-filled eyes with his sleeve, and with a look of horror he realized that it was still that detestable blue color. He quickly pulled the robe up over his head and threw it to the ground. “Thank you. But please, don't call me Great Leader anymore, or anything like that. I think I want to go back to being a plain old painter, and I just want to make paintings, lots of them, that will make people happy. And not just in blue, either...in beautiful colors–I want to try using every color imaginable. And, of course, I want to repay my debts to everyone who has been following me all this time.”

The old man nodded understandingly. Carpainter breathed a sigh of relief that came from the very bottom of his heart, and he smiled as he turned to face Ness.

“Well, here's the key to the cage in that shack,” he said. “I know it would be best for me to go with you and properly apologize, but I don't think I have it in me to meet with Paula face to face just yet. Please, go and let her out for me.”

“I understand,” said Ness, as he took the key and gripped it tightly. “Well then, I'm off. Good-bye!”

Ness ran off with a light and sure-footed gait, and as he passed the believers, they each shouted words of encouragement to him. Thank you! Take care! Good luck!

“What a friendly young man,” Mister Chin muttered, narrowing his eyes in the bright light.

“Yes, very,” Carpainter replied. “I'm jealous. If I'd had such a cheerful and lighthearted childhood, maybe I never would have come up with an idea as bizarre as to turn the whole world blue...oh!”

“What is it?”

“...Speaking of all that,” Carpainter began, as he rubbed his slender chin and furrowed his brows. “Whatever happened to Pokey? With the way he's been acting, I'm worried about that kid's future, too.”

“If it's me you're talking about, you might wanna mind your own business.”

Carpainter whirled around, startled. With a sulky look on his face, the fat kid in question was leaning against that golden figure with his arms crossed.

“Pokey!”

“I'm disappointed in you,” said Pokey. “I thought you had a bit more sense than this!” He glared at Carpainter. “I have no interest in some new religion with boring ideals, so I'm tearing up our contract. And of course, I'll be taking this back, now.”

“W-wait a minute! That thing is dangerous...!” Carpainter stammered.

“If that's the case, does this mean you won't be needing it anymore?” Pokey spat hatefully, as he snatched the golden figure. “I'll find a better way to use it next time...I'm sure.”

“Oh, wait, Pokey!” cried Carpainter.

“See~ ya!” Pokey teased, as he turned around and bent over. He stuck his fat butt up into the air. He grinned.

PPFFFFRRTTTT!

“U-ughh...cough cough cough...!”

“T-that's so foul! I can't take it!”

They had been blasted with a gas so strong it made their eyes water, and a terrible stench that caused their noses to crinkle. Carpainter and the old man recoiled in horror and fell into a coughing fit. And by the time they realized it...Pokey and that golden statue had vanished into thin air.

After the blue breath of that golden devil faded away, the village became a truly peaceful and idyllic utopia once more. Down in the alleyways, or under the eaves of the many houses tickled one by one by the round, passing shadows of altocumulus clouds, people came and went, chatting, drawing water from the well, or hanging out their laundry to dry. On a farm just on the outskirts of the village, there were the vigorous sounds of hoes and spades digging into the ground, and shouts of encouragement as bundles of hay were stacked into piles. On the green and vibrant plains, playful gray and chestnut-brown foals couldn't resist the urge to race with one another, and perfectly content black-and-white cows mooed lazily.

“Mmm, even the air is sweet!” said Paula. “I really needed this!” Now that she was free from the old shack, Paula stretched her stiff limbs joyfully. She shone even brighter in the light of the sun, looking just like an angel on a Christmas card.

Ness became a little nervous. He wanted to get a better look at her, but he knew it would be rude to stare. He turned his eyes away instead, and was suddenly startled by something he noticed.

“Uwaaugh, there's still something blue left, over there!” he cried. “It just dashed by!”

“It's a blue horse!” Paula gasped, in amazement. “That's a symbol for happiness. I think it means that this time, Happy Happy Village has found true happiness...don't you?”

“...Oh is that it? Sorry,” said Ness. He fiddled with the visor of his hat and then kept walking briskly. He seemed to think that if he stood still, he might say something stupid again.

“Wait, you're walking too fast!” said Paula. “I don't have as long a stride as you do, you know!”

“I'm sorry...”

“Ness...all you do is apologize,” said Paula. She quickened her pace to catch up, and she giggled. “I get it. You're embarrassed to be walking with a girl, aren't you? You must think that if we walk side-by-side, it will look like we're on a date.”

“I-i-it's not that, but...” Ness stammered.

“Well then, hold hands with me,” said Paula, and she offered her right hand. It was small, and it seemed so pure and soft.

Ness suddenly turned bright red.

“You don't want to?” asked Paula.

“I-i-i-i-it's not that I don't want to, b-but, but...uhh...” Ness stuttered. “Oh! It would be dangerous if we encountered any enemies while we were holding hands and stuff like that. ...Because we wouldn't be ready to fight back right away, you know?”

“Is that it...?” Paula replied, tilting her head to the side. “This road doesn't seem to be that dangerous, to me, but...well...oh well. Give me your arm, then.” Oh, if only he'd had time to resist! Paula gently placed her fingers around Ness's left elbow. “...Because if I don't hold on to you, eventually you'll end up going off by yourself. After waiting so long to be with you, I don't want to lose sight of you again. You know?”

And so...Ness, whose movements had become so stiff and tense that he looked like a robot, and Paula, whose expression was so very carefree and relaxed, began to walk contentedly along together.

“I know we have a long way to go,” Paula went on, “but I'd like to stop in Twoson first. I'm sure my papa's worried about me, and probably crying so hard snot is just dripping out of his nose by now. I want to let everyone know that I'm okay and gather some things for our journey. Then we can leave for Threed right away, okay?”

“...A...aah,” said Ness, in an attempt to reply. His heart had relocated itself to his left elbow and was pounding away. And yet, the nerve of this Paula girl...! It made his pulse race wildly enough when she had only put her fingers gently on his elbow, but before he knew it, she had completely and tightly wound herself around his whole arm, and she was pressing her body against his. ...How forward of her!

I wonder if she's doing it on purpose, Ness thought. Either that, or she's still just as innocent as a little baby. I don't understand the way girls think at all!

Perhaps Paula did things like this all the time. But hanging on to someone's arm that way...well, yes, it did make it look like they were on a date or something...!

“Our next destination, Threed, isn't too far from there,” Paula continued. “It's only one bus stop away. The difficult part will be the tunnel. I've heard there are ghosts there that come out and menace anyone trying to get through. But, Ness, you're not afraid of things like ghosts, right?”

“...A-aah,” Ness croaked. Ghosts did not make him nervous, but her precocious behavior did. He'd be traveling all alone with this cute girl–just the two of them...which meant that at some point they'd have to stay overnight somewhere, together! He was happy to have her here, and had no reason to be unhappy...but...if this somehow got back to his friends, what would they say?!

“I sense there's something not quite right about Threed,” Paula added. “I think there might be all sorts of terrifying things going on over there. But, as long as we're together, I'm sure we'll be fine! And besides, I have a feeling we'll meet another friend if we go there.”

“A...another friend?!” Ness cried, his spirits suddenly lifting. “Is it...a boy?”

Paula stopped in her tracks, fell silent, and stared Ness right in the face. Ness saw tears rising gradually in her eyes, as if they were testing the surface tension of her violet-colored pupils, and he suddenly went very pale.

“I-I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it that way,” he said.

“I know what you meant,” Paula replied. “It's fine! I understand it all too well!” She shook herself free of Ness's arm. “I'm very disappointed! You're the kind of boy who still clings to old-fashioned sexist beliefs, aren't you? We're both fighting for the same cause, so we should each do our share, together. I'll try not to be a burden on you, and I hope you try your hardest to do the same.”

“Paulaa!” Ness cried.

Paula turned away with a huff, and she stormed off angrily.

Ness exhaled sharply, and his shoulders fell. “...I didn't mean to upset you,” he mumbled, but Paula didn't seem to hear, and she didn't stop. “Tch. Well, you don't have to nag so much about it, at least,” he added quietly.

“I'm not nagging!” Paula yelled, from a distance. Apparently she could only hear the things he didn't want her to hear.

Come to think of it, hadn't he and Paula been communicating through telepathy? Paula was far better at controlling her PSI. She should have been good at figuring out Ness's feelings, which he had a hard time expressing vocally. Unless...

...What if she wasn't upset about the things he had said, but the things he had been thinking? Ness cringed. Those naughty thoughts that had accidentally come to mind just a little while ago...what if she had overheard them? What was he going to do? Any time he was near Paula, would he have to be mindful of not only the things he said, but the things he thought, too...? ...No way! It would be impossible! Ness was just about to start panicking, when suddenly...

“Aaiiieee! Nooo!”

...Paula came running back toward him. And something was chasing right behind her!

“Wh-what's wrong?” Ness stammered. Forgetting his nervousness, he instinctively reached out and caught her. Her momentum almost sent them both tumbling, but he quickly got in front of her to protect her. “Wh...what the heck is that?!” he cried.

...It was a bright red mushroom with white polka dots. Instead of a stem, it had grown two little legs, and it was charging straight for them! It was such a bizarre sight that for a moment Ness stood there staring at it, dumbfounded. Suddenly the thing kicked off the ground and leapt right at them! And as it flapped its bright red cap and soared up above their heads...POP! It spewed out what looked like a puff of white smoke.

“Gah! ...Cough cough! ...Ugh, th...this stuff stings!” Ness cried.

The highly irritating, powdery cloud seemed to attack his nose and throat. It had a scent like alcohol, and it was making him feel tipsy! While Ness choked and struggled, the mushroom rushed into him with a thud. This attack landed a lot harder than he'd expected! Flustered, he gathered his strength and swung his trusty bat. He landed several skillful blows! ...Or so he thought...but with just as much vigor as before, the mushroom thing only puffed out even more spores. Ness's eyes were watering and his chest was congested...and yet that awful little mushroom just kept running in circles!

It took some time, but in the end, Ness was finally able to drive the thing away with his bat.

“W-w-w-what the... The world is...spinning,” Ness stammered. “...The whole galaxy is spinning...”

The horizon before him was billowing like crashing waves. He saw the scenery and all of its colors as though he were viewing them through strong prescription glasses–very psychedelic! Ness's body felt like a strand of kelp, drifting just above the ocean floor. He had no strength left in his legs, so every step was wobbly. He keeled one way, then the other, and he spun in circles. He bumped into a tree. He sat down to rest, and the ground seemed to roll and boil beneath him.

“...Ness!” cried Paula. “Ness! Snap out of it!”

“I-I don't feel so good,” said Ness. “Everything's all...weird...”

“Something's weird, alright,” she replied. He could see two or three Paulas nodding in agreement. “...There's a mushroom growing out of your head.”

A large building surrounded by a white picket fence... A flower bed in all different colors... The adorable sound of children singing... This was the Polestar Preschool. Up on the roof, a black cat napped lazily.

Paula's mother, a beautiful woman with golden hair that hung down to her shoulders, came running to the front door and hugged her daughter tight. Paula pulled the stumbling Ness by his hand and led him into a room that looked like a miniature version of the president's Oval Office. On the far side of a fancy-looking desk, there was a man with an Abraham Lincoln-style beard sitting behind a huge pile of paperwork. He was scowling, with one hand holding his stomach and the other loudly scratching his ankle, which was sticking out from the cuff of his pants. But the moment he saw Paula, he got up so quickly that he kicked over his chair. “You're home safe!” he cried, with a refined smile.

“There now, it's off,” said the doctor, who had come from the Twoson hospital for a house call and was now showing Ness the large mushroom he had skillfully removed from his patient. “This is quite a big one. Might taste pretty tasty if you roasted it with some soy sauce...nah, I'm just kidding. ...Would you mind if I kept it, for research purposes?”

“Go ahead,” said Ness, feeling very relieved. Now that the mushroom had been removed, the world had gone back to normal. “Thank you very much.”

“Don't mention it,” the doctor replied. “But, the two of you should be more careful next time.” He dropped the dangerous mushroom into a beaker and sealed it tightly. “I'm not going to give you some boring lecture, but lately things have been pretty dangerous around here. Monsters, wild beasts, strange weather... Perverts, scoundrels, a “dungeon man”... If you're heading to a place you're unfamiliar with, be careful that you don't get lost or end up catching a chill from a cold sweat, and remember that any carelessness may lead to injury, burns, or loose bowels. Besides that, there may be any number of unknown endemic diseases throughout the world. To tell you the truth, I don't know how I feel about children going off on such a journey on their own. Paula, your father came to me for counseling yesterday. He was so worried about his daughter's future that his stomach was hurting, his shoulders were stiff, and his back was strained... He hasn't been able to sleep through the night so he's been taking afternoon naps with the preschool children, and he seems to have come down with some sort of heat rash...”

“Yeah, that sounds like my papa,” said Paula, with a hint of annoyance.

“Oh...but, uhm,” Paula's father stammered, as he quickly tried to hide the handkerchief he had been using to dab his eyes behind his back. “...But seeing your happy, smiling face has cleared all of those things right up! Well, goodness, I guess we should move on. Ness...first of all, I have to thank you......Oh, honey, look–he's got such eagerness in his eyes, and he's quite young, isn't he? Could he be the boy that Paula always dreamed about, the one she told us would save the world?”

“He does have such a brave and determined expression, doesn't he?” Paula's mother replied, as she nodded. “Ever since Paula was very young, she's had so many, many dreams about you, and she could hardly wait for the day when she would finally meet you. Paula would tell us that someday, she was sure you'd come to save her. ...Oh, and Ness, she would call you, or this boy, rather, her 'prince in a red ball cap'!”

“Really?” said Ness, as he looked at Paula in amazement. “You didn't tell me anything about that.”

“I...I forgot all about it, it was something from when I was a little kid!” Paula replied, her cheeks turning red. “Don't take it too seriously.”

“Paula, now it's your turn to help Ness,” said her father. “You definitely have a mind of your own, and you're a bit of a tomboy, but your papa knows you're also a very good little girl at heart. Under normal circumstances, parents don't usually allow children to go off on journeys all by themselves, but in this case, the world is facing a catastrophe, after all.”

“You know your mama believes in both of you,” her mother added.

“...And your papa is rooting for you, too. So please just give it your all, and do your very best no matter what!”

The two of them were impatient to get to their next destination, but since it was already so late in the day they decided to stay for this one night. Everyone in town was invited over for dinner, and it became a lively potluck send-off house party there in the preschool. In the large main hall, surrounded by adorable crafts and drawings, over-sized building blocks, and an indoor swing set, it appeared that every man and woman, every boy and every girl from the entire town of Twoson had come together. They all loved Paula, and everyone wanted to support her.

The kindergartners put on a play full of encouraging messages. Paula's mother played the organ, and her father sang in his lovely tenor voice. They screened precious eight millimeter home movies of Paula through the years, starting when she was only a baby.

“Hey, hey you're Ness, aren't you? Say, it really is you!”

“...And he's really wearing that red ball cap–it's just like Paula always said!”

“We're trusting you with Paula. You need to protect her, always, and bring her back home safe!”

With all these strangers addressing him and clapping him on the shoulders as if they knew him well, Ness felt a bit overwhelmed, and he was relieved to see a familiar face over by the noodle soup.

“Apple Kid!” he called. “So you're here too! I was planning on coming by tomorrow to say thanks.”

“I heard there was going to be food here, you know?” Kid replied. His hand was sticky with ketchup as he gave Ness a solid handshake. “Well, I guess my Pencil Eraser came in handy, after all.”

“Oh yeah, it did!” said Ness. “I'm still surprised by how well it worked!”

“Just like we said it would, then!” chirped the mouse genius, Algernon, who was poking his head out from the front pocket of Kid's overalls. It appeared he had gotten hold of a bit of the Swiss cheese that had been set out over crackers.

“And to celebrate, he's made something else that's very clever,” Algernon added. “Hey, show it to him, Kid!”

“Oh, that's right!” said Kid. He put down his completely cleaned plate, wiped his face and hands on the nearby tablecloth, and pulled a small machine from his back pocket. “It's an Ultra-Hyper-Transmissive-Wireless-Telephone. It uses the iron and magnesium in the ground beneath our feet instead of traditional cables, and we can talk on it even if you're all the way on the other side of the earth. But you can't use it too frequently, because it takes a lot of time to charge. And on top of that, I forgot to add a dial! So you'll just have to wait for me to call you from my end.”

“Thank you,” said Ness. The thing looked like an electronic mosquito repellent coil that had been crushed by an empty can collection machine, but he no longer doubted the things Kid said. “It's amazing how small you can make these incredible machines!”

“Well, I hope they come in handy for you again sometime,” Kid replied.

“Friends are still friends, no matter how far away they are!” Algernon shouted cheerfully. “Ahh, friends are great to have, aren't they?”

With a full belly, Kid said his goodbyes and then went home, and suddenly Ness found himself very alone again. Before he'd even realized it, the lights had been dimmed and mood music had begun to play. It was time to bring out the alcohol, and the guests were leisurely milling about. It seemed that this party just went on and on. Ness was getting bored, and he stifled a yawn.

He looked over at Paula, who had just been invited to dance by some man he didn't know. With one hand holding up the flowing train of a pure-white dress that looked just like a bride's, she fluttered lightly and with grace. Dressed up like this, Paula was the belle of the ball–no one who set eyes on her could dispute that. She was the center of attention, an absolute idol. He wondered if she had a lot of experience with parties like this. She looked so mature, so magnificent, and only became more and more beautiful. He thought he could even see sparkling, rainbow-colored stars scattered around Paula's golden curls as she smiled. Flustered, Ness rubbed his eyes.

“Are you tired, Ness?” said Paula's mother, when she noticed him there. “That girl's a bit of a night-owl, so she'll probably stay up for a while longer. You can go to bed now, if you'd like. You remember where the bathroom is, right? And I laid out a spare set of pajamas for you, on your bed.”

“Thank you very much,” said Ness. “I guess I will excuse myself a little early. Goodnight!”

Ness took a shower, then he walked back down the hallway while vigorously rubbing his wet hair with a towel. Suddenly he noticed that Paula's bedroom door was open very slightly. The light from her room was leaking out into the hallway. And he could hear a strange, whispering voice.

Ness did his best to be completely silent as he tiptoed closer. Slooowly, cautiously, he peeked inside.

“Oouughh, Paula, you can't go, oh, ooh...” cried the voice, and Ness was surprised to see that it was her father. Still in his tuxedo, and with his beard looking quite refined, he was sitting at Paula's writing desk, full-on sobbing into his hands. “If I have to go for so long without seeing your smiling face, I'll be so lonely...so sad... When I think about the dangers you may face out there, my heart aches so unbearably! But I'll have to see you off with a smile. That's what the father of a warrior must do. Ooohh, but it's so painful, damn it...! Why, of all people, did my sweet, only daughter have to be chosen as a warrior meant to save this world? God is a fool, a fool...a fool!”

The poor man, Ness thought. He gave a tiny sigh, and gently closed the door. Please hold on for just a little while, and I'll do my best to get this over with as soon as possible so she can come home to you. Even if it costs me my life, I promise...I'll bring Paula back home safely in the end.

Ness lay down on the bed, and as he closed his eyes, he balled his hand into a determined fist. He fell asleep almost instantly, and the moment that he did, an image of Paula came into his mind. She was smiling sweetly, but she seemed so much younger, and had her hair tied up tight in a ribbon. She was wearing a kindergartner's smock, and she spoke with a childish lisp.

One day, I know, a pwince will come to meet me, she said. A pwince in a red batheball cap. He will come to save me.

A large, gentle hand was holding this very young Paula's tiny hand tightly.

Hey, Paula, said a deep voice. Between this prince and your papa, which one do you like better?

Boff, she replied.

But, which one do you like better? the deep voice insisted, playfully.

Whaaaat?! cried the very young Paula, and she looked as if she were about to cry. I wike boff! I'm comfused...so comfused!

Ahahahaha, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, said the deep voice. You're confused, huh? Ahahahaha!

Paula's father lifted her up, and he held her high, high above his head. The little Paula giggled and seemed overjoyed. They swung their arms to and fro as they held each other's hands, and they sang songs as they walked down a path. She struck a precocious pose, and he snapped a photo. Her first time at the beach... Her first day at school... Like pages turning through a photo album, from a baby, to a toddler, to a little girl, and finally to a radiant young woman, the time flew past in the blink of an eye. Well, let's go...an extended elbow, an offered arm... She nodded, and tried to look mature as she closed her dainty fingers over it. Shopping and then a meal, just like a date. A father and daughter who looked just like a pair of lovers...

Oh, I see, thought Ness, and he smiled even in his dream. It was her father who she always held hands with.

A father and daughter who were so close that no one could come between them. And a gentle mother who always watched over her, from only a slight distance farther away. Ness drifted along on a river of countless memories of their happy and peaceful family...many of them so very clear and others a little hazy as they floated to the surface or sank down below, and before he knew it, he'd fallen into an even deeper sleep.

The next morning her father put on a brave face, while internally he was shedding hidden tears so forcefully that they would have shot up toward the heavens and then arced back down to the ground, looking for all the world like the quiet, drizzling rain that was falling around them. But externally, he showed not even the slightest hint of his true misery, as he sent them off with a bright smile saying, “Well, I guess you'd better be on your way, warriors!”

Since they were both wearing hooded yellow raincoats, Ness and Paula looked like twins at first glance as they headed straight for the nearest bus station. But when they got there...

“I'm sorry, but none of our buses are running right now,” said the man at the counter. “Ghosts have appeared in that tunnel to Threed, threatening people in terrible, spooky voices and saying things like, 'Go baaaaa~ck, go baaaaaaa~ck!' ...And our drivers all got fed up with it and went on strike.”

“Oh...that's awful.”

“What should we do?”

“I guess we could walk...but even if we walked as fast as we could, I think it would still take us about a week to get there.”

The two of them exchanged glances, then they begrudgingly left the bus station, and just as they did...

“Hello there, little boy, little girl!”

...Someone tapped on their shoulders. He had round, black sunglasses and disheveled, knotty hair. He smiled wide, and there was a gaping hole in his front row of teeth. “If you guys are in a fix, Everdred here can help!”

“It's you!” cried Paula.

“I know, I know, I'm very sorry about what happened before,” said Everdred. He appeared very casual as he bowed to Paula and held out his hand to Ness. “So you're the famous Ness, hm? Nice to meet you–I'm the boss of Burglin Park, Al Everdred. The truth is, a little while ago I helped those Happy Happy guys kidnap little Paula, here. It may sound like I'm just making excuses now, but that was all a part of the plan.”

“The plan?”

“...To get the Mani Mani,” said Everdred, lowering his voice. “I wanted the golden figure that fat kid from Onett had, the 'Mani Mani' statue. It's an item desperately sought-after among folks in the black market. It's an awfully valuable treasure–they say even photos of the thing would trade for a high premium. It was great that I somehow managed to get an in with those Happy Happy guys, but I was so excited about the money I'd just gotten that I went a little overboard with the drinks and I ended up with a terrible hangover. By the time I finally got up, you had already saved little Paula, Carpainter was a whole new man, and I was told that some brat named Pokey took that Mani Mani statue I'd been after and vanished off to who knows where.”

“Pokey?!” cried Ness, as his brows furrowed. “Are you telling me Pokey had something to do with Paula's kidnapping?”

“Yeah,” said Everdred. “At least, I'm pretty sure that was the name that fat kid went by, but...do you guys know each other?”

“Yeah, I know him,” Ness replied. “He's the kid from next door. But, I wonder where Pokey would have found such an incredible treasure...”

“I'd really like to know that, myself,” said Everdred.

“Excuse me,” Paula began. “All this talk sounds really exciting and all, but don't forget, you were just saying that you could help us. What did you mean by that? Are you saying you can drive the bus?”

“No, no–oh, that's right!” said Everdred. “You two are trying to get to Threed, right? Well, I've had my driver's license suspended for give or take thirty years now, so I wouldn't know a steering wheel from a Bering seal, but I can introduce you to my good friends, The Runaway Five. They're a traveling band, and they have their own tour bus. They're heading to a theater in Fourside soon. They'll pass through Threed on the way there.”

Paula glared at Everdred as he rubbed his hands together.

“But I bet it'd cost us quite a bit, wouldn't it?” she said.

“Oh no, no!” Everdred replied. “It's my way of apologizing for all the trouble I caused–this one's free. No charge, it's on the house...heh-heh-heh.”

“Oh, we're so lucky!~❤” Paula cried. Her mood instantly improved, and she gave Everdred a little kiss right on the cheek. “I guess I misjudged you. You're actually a decent man, aren't you?”

“Eheh-heh-heh-heh!”

Those Runaway Five guys looked a lot like mafia men from a movie, with their black clothes, black hats, and black sunglasses. At first glance they seemed pretty intimidating, even though they were anything but!

“Well, well, nice to meet you two!”

“So these're the warriors meant to save the world, huh? Big expectations for such little tykes.”

They received a warm welcome from all five Runaways. One by one the band members each shook their hands, clapped them on the back, and gave them friendly hugs. In all that fast-paced chatter, Ness and Paula never got the chance to say even a single word.

“That Everdred guy, he told us everything. We owe him quite a bit.”

“Our bus is kinda beat up and a little cramped, but make yourselves at home. C'mon, Get in, get in! Aaaaalll the way to the back, all the way.”

“Do you want some soda? Cookies? Music?”

“Music! All we need is music! Without music, life is nothing but pure darkness!”

“Here we go...one, two, three...!”

Inside that tour bus crammed full of people and musical equipment, a passionate, impromptu concert began. An old-fashioned but evergreen style...a somewhat nostalgic melody, with a rough beat... Ness and Paula couldn't help but swing, clap, and stomp along to the rhythm.

“🎵Hey, red-cap boy, pretty little girl!”

“🎵Boy meets girl, all you need is L❤VE!”

“🎵Here comes the world's greatest band, the Runaway Five!”

“🎵Now that's entertainment!”

Jazz, boogie-woogie, and rock n' roll. A sweet, bluesy love song. It was an endless medley, without any intermission. It reminded Ness of a night long ago, when he woke up around midnight and heard the radio playing in his mama and papa's room. Paula recognized a hit song she had heard once while riding on her papa's shoulders. The music was so lively that it put everyone in high spirits, and the Runaways' equipment cases and outfits were jammed up against every single window, blocking out the passing scenery almost entirely. They hadn't even realized that they had already made it through that troublesome tunnel full of ghosts.

This concert on wheels, which seemed as though it might go on forever, took a turn for a more “Auld Lang Syne” motif as one after another the band members showed off their amazing solo techniques on the trumpet, bass guitar, and harmonica. Shortly after this, the bus began to slow down until finally it stopped.

“Well, here we are–Threed.”

The bus doors opened, and after climbing their way over bodies and equipment, the two children got off.

“If you're up for it, you should come on over to Fourside sometime. We'll be performing at the theater there for the next month or so.”

“Goodbye, and good luck! We'll be rooting for you, no matter where we are!”

“Go save the world for us, okay?”

In their rough, masculine voices, the band began to belt out an a cappella version of “We Are the World” in perfect five-part harmony as their tour bus drove away and left the pair of children behind, completely alone.

In quite a stark contrast to the cheerful atmosphere they had been saturated in up until this very moment, this town was terribly dark and gloomy. Although it wasn't raining, heavy black clouds hung low in the sky. This place was very different from the peaceful towns of Onett and Twoson. It was very urbanized, with many cold, unfriendly, tall and square buildings. A broken streetlight, blinking on and off with a sound like a droning cicada, threw a patch of yellow light onto the wet cobblestones. There were very few people passing through the deep shadows in the alleys between the buildings.

“So this is Threed,” said Ness, as he looked all around. “Awfully lonely place, isn't it?”

“I think the first thing we should do is find a place where we can spend the night–aah-choo!,” Paula said, with a little sneeze. “I can feel a chill coming on. I want to get to bed a little early tonight.”

They walked a little farther and found a helpful guide map. It laid out the entire town.

“There,” said Ness. “Hotel Threed. It looks pretty big. It says we have to go about three blocks north from here.”

“...Uhhh,” Paula replied. Her response seemed a little vague.

“What's wrong?” said Ness. “Are you feeling that bad? We should hurry, then.”

“...Look,” said Paula, as she pointed with her pale hand above the signboard with the map. “That grave.”

It was an entire graveyard, in fact. And it took up a rather sizable section of the northern part of town.

“Well, there are bound to be graves here,” said Ness. “It's a pretty large town.”

“There's something moving,” Paula mumbled. “Don't you see it? Over there, squirming around...do you see it moving? Beneath the cold soil of that graveyard...those people who have been dead for so long...one by one, they're coming back to life! ...First one, and now another...they've been waiting for their chance to rise again......NO, you can't! Go back! Stop!” A pained moan escaped her, and then Paula went limp and began to fall over.

“Paula!” Ness cried. He caught her and put his hand to her forehead. “Whoa, you have a fever, don't you?! You must have caught a cold. The inside of that bus was so hot, but now suddenly you're out here, where it's so chilly...and maybe you're carsick, too? Should we find a doctor?”

“No...I'm scared...Ness, I'm scared!” Paula cried. With a surprising amount of strength, she grabbed Ness's shirt. “Someone, something is there! Some vile, evil thing is watching us with its sunken, miserable, shadowy eyes, from the dark depths of the mud and slime. It's a terribly filthy, nauseating thing. Ooh, what is it?! I can't stand to look at it!”

“...Didn't you tell me you weren't afraid of ghosts and things like that?” asked Ness.

“Just plain ghosts are fine,” Paula replied. “I'm not afraid of dead people. Everyone dies, eventually. ...But this thing...it's way more grotesque...and even more sickening... It's absolutely disgusting...uugh...”

“...This isn't good,” Ness muttered. He looked at the map. There was a hospital, but it was far away. The hotel was definitely closer. As soon as possible, he thought, Paula needed to change her clothes, warm up, and get some rest. And if that didn't work, he'd have no choice but to call an ambulance.

“Well, anyway, we can't just stay here like this,” he said. “We should go to the hotel, at least. Can you walk? Should I carry you on my back?”

“I can walk, I think,” said Paula. “I'm sorry, Ness...”

“It's okay,” he replied. “Here, hold on to me. Hang in there, just a little longer!”

Half-dragging the very sickly Paula, Ness headed in the direction of the hotel. A light drizzle finally began to fall, and the worn-down stones in the pavement became slippery and terribly difficult to walk on. They had finally made it two blocks down when he saw a neon sign up ahead, shrouded by the rain and fog, and he couldn't help but smile with relief. ...Until he read it.

He stopped in his tracks. The smile froze on his face. Paula lifted her head feebly and mumbled, “What's wrong?” She was shivering all over. It seemed as though she couldn't see very well.

With a click, the bright red neon lights shut off, and then the sign came back on again. This time, in bluish-purple, it read:

“...It's nothing,” Ness replied with a sigh. “I thought we were on the wrong street, that's all. It's alright. We're almost there.”

The neon sign flickered back to red, and with those same letters ominously dropped out, it once again read simply, “HELL”. Ness quickly turned away, pretending he hadn't seen it. Paula was feeling worse by the minute, and besides that, she hadn't seemed to notice. And thank goodness for that, he found himself thinking.

What's the problem? I shouldn't be so afraid of something like that, he thought, trying to reassure himself. He dragged Paula's body, now more limp than ever because she had lost consciousness, and tried to hurry as he crossed the street. It's just old, and some of the lights have gone out, that's all. But to spell out “hell”, of all things! I bet that's stopped some of the more superstitious guests from staying the night. They should probably fix that!

There would soon be many, many times when Ness would look back, with so much regret, on that moment when he stepped into that hotel. If it weren't for Paula being in the terrible state she was in, he would never have been so hasty and careless. The two of them could have talked it out and made a better decision.

But at that moment, all Ness wanted was to get Paula into a nice, warm bed as soon as possible. And so...

“Hello!” he called, as they passed through the automatic entrance door. It seemed as though no one was there–not in front of the hotel, and not in the lobby, either. ...Not one single person, but still he felt he could not afford to be suspicious about any of this. “Strange... Hey, is anybody here? We'd like to stay the night, pleeaase!”

“...Welcome.”

Suddenly, there was a voice like a whisper right by his ear, and Ness jumped. Somehow unnoticed, an incredibly tall woman had appeared right behind him. Her smooth, black hair looked almost wet, and her eyelids shone with a turquoise blue. She was wearing a very glossy silk shirt. “For the two of you?” she asked. “We have just the perfect room. Shall I guide you to it?”

“Yes, please,” Ness replied. He found himself wondering if he had seen this woman somewhere before. But Paula was getting pretty heavy, so Ness, whose only thought was to put her down and get comfortable as soon as possible, followed politely without a word.

“This way, please,” said the woman, as she led him onward, soundlessly. Somehow, it appeared as though her feet never moved at all. She seemed to glide as she went, several inches above the wine-red carpet spanning the entire length of the hallway.

But Ness, who was entirely focused on keeping Paula from falling to the ground, hadn't really noticed this.

Oh, that's it! Ness thought, as he remembered something, suddenly. This lady looks a little bit like the mom in that movie about the spooky Addamson Family!

They continued to weave their way through the strangely dark, ice cold, and deathly silent building. Finally, the woman pulled a golden key out from who knows where and opened a massive door at the end of the hallway.

“Here you are,” said the woman, as her lips curled into a grin.

“Oh, thank goodness,” Ness sighed. “Thank you very much.” Still holding Paula, he walked through the doorway. He tripped over something that felt like a thick rug, and he stumbled a bit. Inside the room, it was incredibly dark. It was as if someone were holding a pitch-black cloth tightly against his face. “Excuse me, but, where is the light switch?”

There was no reply. Instead...

THUD.

...There was the sound of the door closing. And then...ka-click!...the sound of a key being turned in the lock.

“...Hey...wait!” Ness cried. “Wait a minute...!”

At the sound of his voice, Paula came to her senses. “Ness? Ness, where are we?” she asked, as she slipped out of his arms. “...Why is it so dark?”

Ness pounded against the door. He rattled the knob.

There was no way they would be able to open it.

“...We're trapped,” Ness muttered, and he slumped to the floor. As he did, it sent a light, musty something fluttering into the air around them. Paula fell into a violent coughing fit. Ness pulled out the mini Maglite he'd gotten from Teddy and switched it on.

What he'd sent flying had been dust. In piles upon piles all over this room, which clearly hadn't been swept or cleaned in years, there was a fine, moldy, musty, dust. The room was terribly cramped, and had no windows. Here and there, old spider webs hung down over the heavily stained, ragged wallpaper, and they looked like tattered, decaying shrouds of the long dead. There was certainly no bed, or even one single chair.

“...Whooaa,” Paula gasped. “This looks just like the Haunted Mansion, doesn't it?”

“I'm sorry...Oh, Paula, I'm so sorry!” Ness cried. “I was careless. The neon sign, the lady...they were all so suspicious. But I still followed her without even thinking. If only I had been a little more careful!”

“Yeeaahh...I'm sorry, too,” said Paula. She sat down right in front of Ness and held his cheeks in her hands. “Things got scary, and I lost my courage. I put up a wall and shut myself inside. But while I was passed out, I had a vision!”

“A vision?”

“That's right,” Paula replied with a nod, and then she pressed her nose against his. “One of our friends who we haven't met yet...he just woke up! Someone from across the sea, from a country covered in deep snow. A boy with glasses named Jeff! He's coming. He's headed this way! So, Ness, call out to him with me, so we can make sure he doesn't get lost and that he gets here as soon as he can!”

Chapter 4 – Introducing Jeff!

Winters...

On the northern tip of another country...

Pine trees spread as far as the eye could see, clad in soft snow and standing side-by-side in tightly packed rows like toy soldiers. This was the forest of Snow Wood. The night was quiet, with not one threat to this calm scenery tinged blue by the moonlight.

Beneath a night sky full of brightly shining stars, there was an ancient-looking castle. This building had once been the secondary residence and hunting lodge of the terribly vain, handsome, and world-famous duke, Wilby Grant Everett. At some point, it had been donated to a public boarding school–the Maurice School affiliated with Visconti University–and it was now being used as a dormitory. Roughly one hundred boys with exemplary grades who were between the ages of seven and eighteen had left their homes and now spent day after day studying hard and following the school's strict rules and schedules. The time for lights-out had passed several hours ago, and the building had become cold and completely silent. All of the students were supposed to be in their assigned rooms enjoying pleasant dreams in their somewhat firm but clean beds.

However...

On the third floor, in a room with two beds side-by-side...

Jeff stared into the darkness of the ceiling above him, his eyes open wide. They were cute and round and very large, with thick eyelashes. A few strands of his light brown bangs, smooth and without a single curl, clung tightly to the slight bit of sweat on his forehead. On his cheeks and above his small nose there were faint, scattered freckles, and his soft, full lips, drawn into a pout, were quite lovely, too. His face was truly very refined, terribly attractive, and somewhat epicene. Just between us, it does seem that the Maurice School tended to prefer children with good looks.

For a while he lay on his back like this, without moving an inch and staring out into the darkness, and then Jeff quietly sighed. He furrowed his brows and sat up with a small groan. He felt around by the side of his pillow for his trusty glasses. These glasses were a little unusual. The lenses were perfectly round, the nose pads were made of pink celluloid, and the temples were finished with gold-colored hinges. They were unsold stock left over from the nineteen-twenties. As soon as he put them on, Jeff suddenly looked a little silly–like an actor from some comedic silent movie. Just between us, Jeff wasn't very fond of being complimented on his good looks.

Throwing the blanket aside, he lowered his feet to the cold floor with a clank. Yes, a clank. Peeking out from underneath his pajama pants, both of his thin legs were fitted with aluminum, iron, and leather auxiliary support bracers. The sound rang out unpleasantly in the darkness, but it was all too familiar to Jeff. Often, he would self-deprecatingly compare himself to Frankenstein, that misshapen and pathetic monster, dragging a heavy chain weighted with something that looked a bit like a bowling ball.

Jeff couldn't help but shake his head, which caused the bed to creak.

“...Huh? Jeff, what's wrong?”

A very concerned Tony opened his eyes. Running his fingers roughly through his terribly disheveled bed-hair, he gave a big yaaaawn.

“Do you have to go to the bathroom?” he asked. “Do you need help?”

“I'm fine,” Jeff answered abruptly, and he headed to the closet, dragging those heavy legs. He quickly began to change his clothes.

“Where are you going?” asked Tony, sitting up in a panic. “Don't tell me you plan to go outside at this time of night!”

“Someone's calling me,” Jeff replied. “I need to go right away.” He fastened his shirt collar neatly at his throat, and then, out of habit, he started to put on a necktie embroidered with the Maurice School emblem before hesitating. “I guess I probably won't need this,” he sighed.

“Hey, but, aren't you tired?” Tony began, then he shook his head defeatedly. “Well, I guess an ordinary kid like me can never understand the things a prodigy like you does...Oh, be careful!”

Putting on pants while standing was a little dangerous for Jeff. But, the fact that he was even trying to do so was real proof of his urgent determination. Tony, who was naturally kind and caring, began to assist him even though he didn't fully understand the situation. He helped Jeff change out of his pajamas, passed him a handkerchief, and supported him as he tied his shoelaces.

“You said someone was calling you. Who?”

“A girl,” Jeff replied.

“A girl?!”

“And someone else, a guy wearing a red baseball cap,” Jeff added. “They're in a town called Threed in Eagleland, and they seem to have been locked in a room in a haunted hotel.”

“Did you say Eagleland?” said Tony. “Isn't that all the way across the ocean?!”

“Yeah,” Jeff replied. “That's why I need to leave as soon as possible.” At last, he finished getting dressed. Tony still looked quite surprised as Jeff put a hand on his shoulder and smiled warmly. “I don't think I'll be back before the morning assembly,” Jeff went on, looking very serious. “I need you to pretend you don't know anything. Tell them you were fast asleep, that you never realized I had left, and that you don't know where I went. ...I'm sorry for all the trouble I'm causing for you.”

“'Trouble'? No way! We're friends after all, aren't we?” said Tony, looking hurt. “You always seem so eager to do everything on your own. I want to help you...and I want to go with you. But, you'd just call that more 'trouble' for me, wouldn't you?”

“...Yeah,” Jeff replied, coolly. “This is my problem. It shouldn't be yours, too.”

“I get it, I get it,” Tony sighed, looking completely defeated. “I won't stand in your way. But, we should at least go have a few words with Maxwell. He has the key to the main entrance, and he's always been rather fond of you. If you just disappear, he's definitely going to chew me out over it!”

Beakers all in lines, flasks all in rows... Full sets of countless test tubes that looked a lot like xylophones... Heated above an asbestos wire mesh, water vapor rose briskly from its container, coiled its way through a curled, transparent pipe to cool, and then passed through a sheet of filter paper where it became a strange, sparkling, purple liquid.

“Did you say Warriors, out to save the world?” asked Maxwell. He was in the middle of some kind of experiment in the laboratory. A senior at the school and the leader of the dormitories, with an unprecedented five consecutive victories at the Worldwide Mathematics Rally under his belt, Maxwell had a kind of special status at the school, which came with special privileges. In the dead of night, or right in the middle of class, if Maxwell suddenly wanted to carry out his experiments, then he was allowed to go carry out his experiments. “So then,” he went on, “are you saying you're out to become the Warrior that saves the Warriors out to save the world?”

“Yes,” said Jeff. “And you, Maxwell, could become the Warrior who saves the Warrior out to save the Warriors out to save the world.”

“Helping you get out of here unnoticed would be no problem,” Maxwell replied, with a smirk, “but just how the heck do you think you're going to get all the way over to Eagleland? Even if you're in the mood for a walk, that's quite a long way to go. And of course, on top of that, there's the issue of those legs of yours.”

“I don't know,” Jeff answered quietly, his cheeks turning slightly red. “But first, I have to head south. Those were the directions this girl sent to me using telepathy.”

“This is a very shady and very bizarre story,” said Maxwell.

“I agree with you,” said Jeff. “I still feel like this is all just some weird dream I'm having. But, Maxwell, something tells me this isn't a lie, or some kind of joke.”

“Are you saying it's intuition, based on pure reasoning and transcendental perception?” Maxwell replied. “From the very start, Jeff, I always knew you were different from your peers! Well, it's fine by me. Let's go unlock the main entrance. I'll get the key, and you go on ahead. ...Tony, you watch over all this equipment! I can't stop this experiment now. If this part here seems to start boiling over a bit too much, just loosen this valve over here.”

“Y-yes, sir!” Tony replied, standing at attention. With a bit of apparent reluctance, he took Jeff's hand. “I really wanted to come with you all the way to the gate,” he said, “but I guess we'll have to say good-bye here, instead. Jeff, be careful out there! I'll be praying for your safety the whole time, okay?”

In the silence of the dormitory, Jeff climbed one flight of stairs lined with gray carpeting, then descended another. Then he continued down a long hallway and went up another flight of stairs. ...And by the time he finally made it to the entrance hall, he was already out of breath and exhausted. The metal leg bracers didn't bend very easily and he couldn't lift them very high, so it was very difficult to manage when there were no handrails. The joints of the bracers were creaking as if they hadn't been oiled well enough, and his calves were puffy, swollen, and sore.

Jeff realized that under normal circumstances, Tony would have been right by his side, assisting him the whole way. At first Jeff had thought that his roommate was a bit nosy, but it turned out he was really very kind, and in the end, Jeff came to rely on him quite a bit. But he also knew that he was probably struggling due to a lack of regular exercise, as well.

Will I even be able to get through all the snow? Jeff thought. He was beginning to feel anxious. And then how will I manage to cross the whole ocean, in order to help these people I don't even know...?

“You're a bit late.”

Maxwell had already made it to the entrance. He opened the door, and a cold wind blew through it. It was eerily dark outside. “What's wrong, Jeff?” he asked. “You've gone so pale.”

“...It's nothing,” said Jeff. “Thank you very much. I'll be on my way, now.”

Jeff forced himself to smile, and he walked out through the door. And then...

...Piff, piff-piff! He was pelted with several snowballs! As he cried out in surprise, he slipped on the frozen ground and landed right on his backside.

“What's this? Aren't you supposed to be a Warrior?”

“Don't disgrace the good name of the Maurice School, now!”

“Good luck out there, Jeff, don't wear yourself out too much!”

“You guys...” Jeff murmured.

His mouth was open wide in surprise. A large crowd of boys, all in their pajamas, had come to see him off. Every one of them had high grades, and they were known for their good conduct. Their behavior was always prim and proper, and they never had even one wrinkle in their uniforms. In class and during tests, Jeff always had a sense that there were fierce, secret rivalries burning between them, and that they were all eagerly seeking opportunities to take one another down. The only other boy who was usually willing to chat with him was Tony, despite Jeff's often dark mood and his way of putting up isolating emotional walls. Everyone else seemed to want to keep to themselves.

And in fact, Tony was there, too. ...Even though he was supposed to be back in the laboratory keeping an eye on things. As always, he ran straight over and helped Jeff up.

“If a little thing like that can knock you over so easily, I worry about your future, Warrior,” said Maxwell as he came forward, smiling. "So we came up with just the perfect gift for you.”

Four of his classmates came forward, cheering joyfully. They were pushing some kind of metallic object. It was something like a snowmobile, and something like an off-road bike, with a control panel straight out of a sci-fi robot cartoon.

“Oh, that's...!” cried Jeff.

“That's right!” said Maxwell. “It's the trusty hyper-wheelchair that once belonged to the school's dormitory leader many, many, many generations ago, the great Hawking! We swiped it out of the memorial hall. It was in an exhibit expressing the school's gratitude, but we knew this little treasure was just going to waste in there. I'm positive you'll be able to make better use of it.”

Jeff pulled himself up into the hyper-wheelchair. The red leather seat could be adjusted using air pressure. It drove on six wheels and was powered by a solar battery. Steering was handled with a joystick. In the “cockpit”, there were many meters and switches all in rows. The storage compartments had been packed with useful items, like a first aid kit, a tea kettle, sweet bread and meat pies, and a bunch of bananas.

“Vroom-vroom! You look so cool!”

“It really suits you!”

“Don't do anything too wild, or you'll get expelled!”

“...You guys,” Jeff said again, as he swallowed a lump that had formed in his throat. “Thank you, all of you! Thank you so much! ...And you too, Maxwell.”

“Of course, of course!” Maxwell replied, as he shook Jeff's hand solidly. “You're off on a man's journey, now. I just wanted to congratulate you. ...Now, don't you go dying out there!”

“Right,” Jeff replied. “....Oh, Tony!”

“...Ooohh, Jefff,” cried Tony, as he clung to Jeff's neck. “Ohh, if it's come to this, I feel like I should confess something. I really, really, really like you. What I mean is, uhm, I like you in a...in a very serious way!”

“...Yeah,” Jeff began, as he ruffled Tony's curly hair with his fingers. “I like you, too. ...But...not in that very serious way.”

“Is that so? I suppose...I kind of figured maybe you didn't,” said Tony, as he wiped tears from his eyes. “...I guess it can't be helped, huh. But friendship...our friendship, will always be something real, at least!”

“Of course,” Jeff replied with a nod, as he started the engine. It purred in a very pleasant way, and it brought up his courage. “Well, I guess I'm off!”

He found a switch marked with a picture of a snowman, and when he hit it...whoosh! The wheelchair's height adjusted, and sturdy spikes suddenly sprang from somewhere within the rubber of the tires.

In a forest lit by moonlight, Jeff cruised along smoothly through scenery blanketed in white. The road was snowy and covered in ice. He couldn't travel very quickly, but when he thought about walking this same route step by step, buried up to his waist in snow, he appreciated how unbelievably comfortable this was. So much so that he was even humming to himself.

“...Hmmm,” he hummed. “This one's a fog light, this one's to check the traffic... What does this switch do? ...Uwaaugh!”

He should have been paying better attention to the road. He had neglected this most basic fundamental guideline for any driver, so when a human-shaped shadow darted out ahead of him, he slammed on the brakes in a panic. Immediately the hyper-wheelchair lost its balance and flipped over! He crashed into a pine tree, and piles of snow rained down on him.

“So c-cold!” he cried. With a great deal of effort, he crawled out and checked on the buried machine. “Whew,” he sighed. “Well, I hope it's not broken, but, jeeze...” He pushed and he pulled with all his strength. “Damn, it's so heavy. ...Heave...ho!”

“Oo-hoo, hoo-ey!”

“Huh?!” cried Jeff, in alarm. He hastily adjusted his glasses, which had slipped down his nose. To his amazement, there was suddenly a large man with an overgrown beard and shaggy hair right next to him, and apparently he was trying to help Jeff right the hyper-wheelchair. The man was barefoot, even in this kind of cold, and only wore loosely linked animal pelts all over his body. The tremendous muscles in his arms and chest were bulging from the effort this large man was exerting. “A y-yeti?” Jeff stammered. “A member of some mysterious race of giants, maybe...? Oh, that shadow from before, that must have been you, huh...?” As Jeff pondered all of this, his hand slipped away from the wheelchair, and...

Whump!

...It returned to its proper position. With a triumphant “Ooh-hoo!”, the large man proudly raised his arms into the air.

“Th-thank you,” said Jeff, as he hastily forced a smile. “You saved me. And what about you...are you alright? I didn't hit you, did I?”

“Ee-hoo? Hoo?” The large man imitated Jeff's inflection and smiled. His face, half hidden by filthy hair, was sunburned and looked like old leather. His huge nose was covered in warts, and the teeth peeking out from under his upturned lips were very worn and had massive gaps in between. His face was terribly ugly, but somehow it still had a sort of charm to it.

“You can't understand me, can you?” said Jeff. “...Hmm...Oh, I know! Are you hungry?”

“Hoo-heh hoh-heh, hoo?” replied the large man.

“You can have some of this, if you want,” said Jeff. He fumbled around in the storage compartment and pulled out some food. He held out the bananas and the bread.

“Hoo-ehh-hoo, ehh-hoo?” the large man grunted.

“It's food,” Jeff replied. “Look, like this...ahh!” He peeled the banana and mimed eating it. The large man cried something like, GAH-HOO!, then he reached out with his massive hand and snatched the banana away with terrific force. He ate it in a dreamy daze. Then, one by one, he ate all the other bananas, too. Then he ate the bread. He just kept on eating!

“You were really hungry, weren't you?” said Jeff. “...But, you must need something to wash it all down with. Do you drink tea?”

Using the lid of his thermos as a cup, he poured out some steaming-hot black tea and offered it to the large man. His eyes wide and sparkling, the large man hastily snatched this too, and some of the tea spilled out onto his hand. “HOO-AAYYEEEEEIII!” he cried. Apparently, it was still very hot. The large man whimpered and rolled around, thrusting both of his hands into the snow.

“I'm so sorry!” said Jeff. “Are you okay?”

“GAAHH!” the large man roared.

“Uwaaugh!” cried Jeff, as the large man swatted at him, and he was struck in the ribs and knocked onto his back. “Ouch...! This guy's a bit rough...”

The large man was sniffling and had curled himself up into a ball, holding his knees in his arms. Out of the corners of his very frightened eyes, he was watching warily as Jeff slowly approached with the first aid kit in one hand.

“Let me take a look,” said Jeff, calmly. “You may have been burned. Let me take a look at it.”

“Oooh...hooo...GAA!” growled the large man, as he drew back his lips and showed off his teeth, menacingly.

Jeff sat down without saying a word, and he gripped the large man's arm tightly. He would have been lying if he had said he wasn't scared. If this man, with his super-human strength, were to suddenly lose his temper again, he'd surely beat Jeff down for real the next time.

Motionless, and with his eyes fixed on Jeff, the large man gave in. Reluctantly he dragged those huge, meaty hands out of the snow. His fingernails were short and jagged, as if he'd been biting at them. He had many old scars, too. The very tip of his index finger was slightly red and swollen.

“Oh, you've got to be kidding!” Jeff exclaimed, in relieved surprise. “It's just this little bit here? You're kind of a sissy, aren't you?” He smiled, and then he smeared a bit of ointment on his patient's swollen finger. The large man's eyes went wide, and he put his fingertip to his nose and sniffed at it. “Hey, hey, don't lick it!” Jeff cried. “Oh well, I guess I'll have to take it a step further.”

Flabbergasted, the large man stared at his finger, which was now wrapped with three Band-aids.

“Well, that's that,” said Jeff. He stood up, brushed the snow out of the wheelchair's cockpit, and climbed into it. The engine started up just fine. It didn't seem to be damaged at all. “Well, I'm very sorry, but I have somewhere to get to, and fast. Good-bye! Take care of yourself!”

He turned on the wheelchair's headlights and set out. This time he would be sure not to take his eyes off the road!

But then...

Thump, thud!

“Wh-what is that...that vibration?” cried Jeff. “Maybe this thing really is broken after all—uwaaugh! It's you!”

Thud, thump! In the hyper-wheelchair's rear-view mirror, an image of the large man, his nostrils flaring and his face turning red from exertion, grew larger and larger before Jeff's eyes. With just a few long strides, he was running alongside the wheelchair. He flashed a triumphant smile at Jeff, who seemed dumbfounded. In the moonlight, the large man's teeth glistened like fangs. In one swift motion he raced ahead, with his knees almost touching his chin as he ran. If Jeff wasn't careful with his steering, he'd end up falling into one of the massive footprints this large man was leaving behind in the frozen ground! And with Jeff seeming to chase after him so frantically, his “opponent” got more into the spirit of it all, and he became a bit over-zealous as he ran.

“Hey, I'm not trying to play with you right now!” cried Jeff.

“Ga-hoohoohoo, hoo!” cried the large man.

Flying over the snowy fields on that moonlit night, they were in a dead heat! It was a race between Jeff, who was swerving and swaying and trying to get ahead, and that overjoyed wild man who seemed to dance gleefully as he ran. From deep within the forest, birds and animals that had been awakened from their slumber looked on, bewildered.

Before Jeff was even aware of it, dawn began to break. Clusters of snow in the treetops turned a gentle peach color, bathed in the warm light of the morning sun. The large man's pace eventually slowed, and suddenly he slumped to his knees. With a thud, he fell forward onto the ground.

“...Huff, huff...Damn,” Jeff panted. “How did I get into this mess...?”

Jeff seemed to have suddenly run out of energy, himself. He stopped the wheelchair and slumped back exhaustedly into its seat. His eyelids drooped heavily, as if they might close at any moment...and then... Achoo! ...He sneezed. “I gotta take a break,” he mumbled. “At this rate I'm going to end up catching a cold.”

Jeff fumbled around in the wheelchair's storage compartment and pulled out a towel, then he stuffed it into his shirt to mop up his sweat. He also found a thick down comforter, folded tightly into a square. He quickly spread it out and wrapped himself up in it. Its warmth was absolutely heavenly! Oh, but... “He's probably cold, too, isn't he?” Jeff worried aloud. He hastily sat up to check on his companion, and saw that the large man was lying spread-eagle in the snow, snoring loudly. Somehow he had managed to fall asleep, just like that. Sighing with relief, Jeff made himself cozy. He pulled that soft comforter right up to his chin and wrapped himself up tight. Then...

...He drifted off into a very peaceful sleep.

At that same time, across the sea...from just beyond the door to a certain musty closet in a certain eerie hotel...

...There came a very soft tip-tap, tap, tap.

A gentle knock with a playful rhythm.

Ness and Paula, who had dozed off leaning against one another, instantly sprang to their feet.

“Who could it be?” Ness whispered, turning toward Paula. The mini Maglite had been turned off to conserve battery power. The room had no windows, but light from somewhere out in the town was seeping faintly through cracks in the wood paneling. Their eyes had adjusted enough to the darkness that each of them could at least make out the other's facial expressions.

“Could it be Jeff?” asked Ness.

And just as Paula silently shook her head...

“Well, well...how are you doing in there, young Ness?” said an awfully cheerful voice that didn't quite suit the mood of the place. “I came here because I heard this was where you went off to, but the service at this hotel is pretty terrible. ...If you're here with a cute enough girl, though, well, I guess it might be tolerable.”

“Pokey!” Ness cried, and he threw himself at that heavy door as if he planned to ram through it. “Pokey, is that you?! Open the door, we've been trapped in here!”

“You have, haven't you?” Pokey replied, very casually. “And for a zombie, she was kinda pleasing to the eye, wasn't she? The lady who brought you two here, I mean. And I know the guy giving her orders, too. Some bizarre creature called Belch, or something like that. He's very dependable, but, far from pleasing the eye, he's the most thoroughly disgusting and downright nastiest character I've ever seen.”

“...Pokey?” Ness murmured, and Paula gently supported him as he reeled from shock. “How do you...how do you know someone like that? Don't tell me you...you're really...”

“Belch came from somewhere in outer space,” Pokey went on. “For some reason, he calls me 'Master Giygas', and he seems to have a lot of respect for me.” He paused to chuckle. “He's a much better friend than the humans who make fun of me and call me fat, stupid, and a coward! And since Belch can use the Force or whatever, there are a lot of interesting things going on here in Threed. Ghosts and zombies are crawling up out of their graves and wandering mindlessly all over town. And boy, people sure are selfish! So long as they're out of sight, there's all this glorification of the 'spirits of our ancestors' or the folks up in heaven. And every now and then, when the mood strikes them, people send them prayers and even requests! ...But then, when their reeking, rotting, festering corpses truly do rise from the grave and come to meet them for a joyous reunion, they have the nerve to run away screaming......Oh, but on a different note entirely...Ness, there is something I wanted to ask you about.”

Ness furrowed his brows. “...What is it?”

“The Ness Burger recipe,” Pokey replied. “The secret, special spices. I wanted to take this opportunity to find that out for my father. If you tell me, I can bring you one of those double cheeseburgers from the four-dollar-deal, if you like...?”

Grrrrummble... The second there was talk of food, Ness and Paula's stomachs growled. They had been locked up for half a day now, and had been trying their hardest not to think about eating.

“I don't know that,” Ness replied, gritting his teeth. “I don't know what the spices are. But even if I did, do you really think I would tell you?!”

“I see,” said Pokey. “Well then, I have no more use for you. ...Bye-bye, Ness! Go ahead and starve, panic, and piss yourself to death, then! Ahahahahahaha!”

His loud, irritating laughter gradually faded further and further away, until finally they couldn't hear it anymore.

“...Pokey,” Ness groaned, as he leaned against the door and covered his sweaty face with his hands. “Has he really, actually become a pawn of the bad guys? Pokey...?”

“I don't think he's a pawn,” said Paula, quietly. “I think that guy...he's become the evil itself, the very threat this world is being menaced by. ...And I don't think he's even realized that himself, yet, but... Oh! That's why we can't give up now, there's still time...!”

Paula knelt down on the cold floor, clasped her hands together, closed her eyes, and focused her thoughts.

“Jeff...Jeff...Can you hear my voice?” she called.

Ness sat down by her side.

“...Jeff, we're waiting for you,” he added. “...Please! Come quickly, hurry...!”

<...Come quickly...Jeff...!>

On the tip of a tree branch, a single drop of melting snow glistened in the light of the fully risen sun. Then it fell onto Jeff's pale, smooth cheek.

“W-w-w-whoa!” He woke with a start and looked around. The large man was gone. Jeff was all alone. “Was it all just a dream?” he muttered. All around him there were footprints scattered wildly, made by large, bare feet. “...No, I guess not.”

“Well anyway, I need to hurry!”

For half a day he headed south, and then suddenly the path ahead became totally smooth, and it glistened brightly. This was Lake Tess, the country's largest inland sea.

“Damn it...I forgot about this lake!” Jeff moaned. “How am I going to get across...?”

There were many tents set up along the lake's icy shore in various sizes and colors. There were several men milling about here and there with binoculars to their faces. They seemed quite preoccupied, and Jeff approached their camp without any of them even realizing it.

“Good morning,” he called.

Jeff's face suddenly appeared in the lenses of one of the men's binoculars.

“Waugh!” Startled by the unexpected and very close-up view of something so nearby, the man jumped and fell over backwards, clutching at his heart. “Ahh, you scared me,” he panted. “Who are you...?”

“My name is Jeff. I'm a student of the Maurice School. There's something kind of urgent I need to do to the south, across this lake, but...what are all of you doing here?”

“We are the Tessie Watchers~!” the man said with a bit of arrogance, and then he hurried to return the binoculars to his face as if he were afraid he might miss something. “Apparently a huge and mysterious creature has appeared here in the enigmatic Lake Tess! We thought the name 'Nessie', like the one in Loch Ness, had become kind of stale, so of course we quickly named this one 'Tessie', after Lake Tess! It's a great name, don't you think? Eccentric hardcore enthusiasts came running from all over the world, hoping to catch even just a glimpse of our beloved Tessie, and now our group of Watchers has around twenty members! ...Oh, but those guys in that gaudy orange tent over there aren't part of our group. They're a television crew from the country of Yapan.”

“Oh, I see,” said Jeff, feigning admiration. “So, you guys must have been camping out here for a while, huh? How do you restock your food supplies and stuff like that...by boat?”

“By helicopter,” the man replied. “But we just got our most recent delivery yesterday. It won't come around again for another week.”

“...Another week, huh,” Jeff muttered. He had been thinking that maybe he could ask for a ride, but he couldn't wait that long.

“Don't be so down-hearted about it, you're still young,” said the man. “Would you like some cup noodles?”

“...Sure, thank you,” said Jeff.

“Do you have a way to boil water?” the man asked.

“I have a kettle,” Jeff replied. “As long as I can find water, I can boil it.”

“I see.”

<Jeff...go south! Go farther south! Find us, quickly... If you don't, then soon, we'll be...>

Once again, the heartbreaking pleas of someone he still hadn't met echoed through his head.

Squinting against the bright sunlight, Jeff looked out over the lake. Using the cup noodles he'd just been given as a makeshift visor, he stared off to the south. He didn't know what was out there, but he had to go.

Somewhere out there, there was a factory workshop with enough parts and tools to allow him to convert the hyper-wheelchair into a small boat. But such a facility was probably nowhere near this lake.

“...If they need me to go south,” Jeff muttered, “then I guess I'll have to keep going south, however I can.” Deep in the mind of the usually very logical and very rational Jeff, an absurd conviction began to grow. One might even call it complete desperation. “Well...Here goes nothing!”

Jeff climbed back into the hyper-wheelchair, slowly turned it due south, and revved the engine. Vrrroom...vrrrrooommm...vrrrroooooooommmm! ...He released the handbrake.

“Oh, hey, you! What are you doing?!”

“Hey, hey, kid, you're in our shot, get out of the way!”

“You idiot, keep filming, keep filming! A mysterious boy, deciding suddenly to drown himself in Lake Tess! This will be perfect for the evening news!”

Amid all the fuss being made by the film crew and the other onlookers along the shore, Jeff accelerated, then he drove straight over the lake. The ice on its surface cracked and creaked under the chair's six wheels, and ice-cold water began to overtake it. At first the wheelchair chugged along, and then it started to sputter. Its own powerful momentum carried it forward, but it soon began to wobble and make odd sloshing sounds. It seemed as though it would sink at any moment.

“...This doesn't look good,” Jeff groaned. “I assumed a vehicle once owned by Hawking would be amphibious.” Desperately he flicked every switch, hoping that at least one of them would help, somehow. A retractable light came out, and then it went back in. Washer fluid sprayed out onto the windshield, and the wipers swished back and forth. Oh, thank goodness! The airbag deployed! That might help him to float, at least. But that icy water kept pouring in, relentlessly. He was already submerged up to his waist. A fish slipped in inadvertently, and then, with a terrified splash, it leapt out and fled. Jeff found himself smiling resignedly. “I guess my intuition was wrong,” he sighed.

But just then...

“Ooh-oouuuuhhh!” A powerful cry rang out, shaking both the solid ground and the watery surface of the lake. “Uuuooouuuuuhh...oooouuuuhh!”

“Huh?” Jeff turned to look, and then his eyes went wide behind those glasses. “It's you!” he cried.

...It was that large man from last night! He was standing on a cliff overlooking the lake and howling up into the sky like a wolf. When Jeff's gaze met his, the large man waved wildly at him, and Jeff could see that the Band-aids were beginning to peel off of his hand. And then...

“Whoa, what the-?!” Jeff cried. Suddenly he felt a sensation of weightlessness, like when an airplane goes through strong turbulence. Instinctively, he clung tightly to the hyper-wheelchair. Little ripples began to form on the surface of the lake, which until then had been so still that it had almost looked like a giant mirror. Suddenly it wasn't quite so bright and shiny anymore. It was jet-black! Jeff went pale and stiff, and found that he couldn't move. The rising waves grew larger and larger, until finally the whole area around Jeff was bubbling and churning violently, like a pot of water in full boil. “Please stop! I get seasick easily!” he cried. But of course, a lake has no ears, and was deaf to his pleas. The tremors soon became a swift and powerful current. And then the swirling current became a full-on whirlpool! It felt just like the teacup ride at an amusement park. No...it was more like being thrown into a giant washing machine!

“...Ugghh,” Jeff moaned. “I don't feel so good...please, have mercy...!”

Hearing Jeff's cries, the Tessie Watchers–who were all very good-natured men– exchanged anxious glances.

“Someone needs to help him!”

“B-but, how can we?”

“Hey, keep rolling!” cried a voice from elsewhere. ...That camera crew seemed to care more about their scoop than about doing any life-saving. “Keep rolling, and get closer!” There was the sound of a splash as the unfortunate cameraman, moving forward just as he was told, fell into the water. “That's it! That's fine, now zoom in from there!”

“Do we have any life jackets, or anything like that?”

“We could try throwing a rope, but I don't think it would reach.”

“Hey, look, what the...could that whirlpool really be...?”

The Tessie Watchers ran about in a panic, while off to the side...

“Ooouuuu...ooooouuhh!”

...The large man cried out loudly one more time. And then...

“Ooooohhhhhhh~?!”

What an incredible sight!

Jeff was suddenly floating back to the surface, and before their very eyes he began rising higher, and even higher! Cascading droplets of water sparkled in the sunlight. A massive creature slowly and very quietly rose up from the water, with Jeff balanced on the very top of its scaly head. Its enormous face seemed so gentle and peaceful. Ah, it was a dinosaur! A beast with pale green skin, a long neck, and flippers for feet!

“...Tessie...!”

The Tessie Watchers dropped their binoculars as tears ran down their cheeks.

“It really came out...it came out for us!”

“It exists...it really exists, after all!”

“Ohh...Tessie...!”

Under the peaceful gaze of that giant creature, even the members of that unsavory television crew found themselves frozen in awe, and they couldn't help but fall to their knees with their mouths hanging open.

Jeff had gone completely white. He was seeing the world from a whole new perspective, quite literally, and the water's surface was suddenly so terribly far away. Now it looked like a glaring, blue-tinged, silvery mass that would hurt so badly if he fell into it.

But just underneath him was the rough, scaly skin covering the mysterious Tessie's massive head.

“...This is incredible,” Jeff mumbled to himself, as his eyelids twitched and he shivered. “Keep it together, Jeff, don't faint...because if you faint, you're going to fall!” (Just between us, Jeff had a tiny little phobia of heights.) “Don't be afraid. In fact...smile! Be happy! And be proud–you're getting to experience something no one else ever has. Maxwell and Tony would be so jealous!”

Once it had extended its neck to the fullest, Tessie began to swim vigorously. Surprisingly, it didn't jostle around any more when it was in motion than it had when it was holding still. And, also surprisingly, it was swimming in the direction that Jeff had been wanting to go all along–it was heading south!

Well then, I guess my intuition was right, after all! I wonder if maybe that telepathist girl lent me some of her powers...

With these thoughts, Jeff began to feel at ease. He finally allowed himself to gaze at his surroundings. Of course, he did so very, very carefully, so that he wouldn't lose his balance and fall. The shore, the forest, the faraway mountains...he took all of it in. The Tessie Watchers were now smaller than the tiniest ants. This was a bit of an impossible perspective, from a sacred sort of throne–something very few humans would ever be allowed to see! Jeff couldn't help but smile proudly. Then he noticed that large man, leaning forward anxiously on the cliff's edge, watching over Jeff as he went. Even he looked like nothing more than a tiny speck, now.

“Oh I see...he was calling out to Tessie, here,” Jeff suddenly realized. “Oh, I can barely see him anymore! ...Good-bye, and thank you so much!”

Jeff raised his hand high into the air, and...

...“Ooh-hooo, hooo!” the large man replied, as he jumped excitedly and threw both hands above his head, waving them wildly.

“Take care of yourself!” Jeff cried.

Tessie tore straight across the surface of that vast lake. Its head was so wide that Jeff was able to crawl out of the hyper-wheelchair and dry his soaked body in the sun. He enjoyed this dreamy pleasure cruise for about two hours. When they got to the shore on the opposite side, Jeff disembarked and Tessie quietly returned to the depths of the lake. Fortunately, the climate was much warmer here, and Jeff was no longer surrounded by such a snowy landscape.

The wheelchair, however, was in bad shape. The engine still ran, but its wheels were not receiving enough power. It appeared that a part of the drive system had gone bad.

“That's not surprising, after all I just put it through,” Jeff sighed. Using tools built into the wheelchair, he checked just under its drive shaft. “Ah, is this the part that's broken, here? Well, if I connect this part to that part, then...”

He removed two of the six wheels and fastened them to the back of the wheelchair with an elastic cord. It took about a half an hour, but he managed to modify it quite a bit. He got in to test it and found that it ran decently enough, but with an unsettling vibration and a rattling sound. “Well, whenever this thing breaks down, at least I won't be surprised,” he muttered.

Putting on a brave front, he continued onward. Over mountains, through fields and forests, and across a valley. To the south, then further south.

Along the way, the view became rather pleasant, and the road evened out. When he got hungry, Jeff decided to eat the cup noodles he'd been given. Before he left the lake, he had washed out the kettle that he'd used to make tea and refilled it with water. He held a cigarette lighter to the kettle, and eventually the water began to boil. After that, as I'm sure you know, he only had to wait about three minutes.

“...Well, anyway,” Jeff thought aloud while steering with his knee and slurping noodles (talking to himself while he thought was a habit of Jeff's), “both that large man and Tessie...they seem to be creatures that were supposed to have gone extinct a very long time ago. Apparently, Tessie began to appear only recently. And I've never seen anything like that large, kind-hearted guy, even on TV. I wonder where they've been hiding all this time...” He paused, and then a look of sudden realization crossed his face. “Oh, I know! He seemed to know Tessie pretty well. They must both have come from the same place...wherever that place may be.”

And if so...he didn't think it was the kind of place that could be reached by any ordinary means, be it walking, driving, or swimming.

“A rift between the dimensions, maybe?” Jeff muttered, furrowing his brows. “Parallel universes, a disruption of our timeline, unknown invaders, genetic engineering, like in Jurassic Park? ...In any case, something very unusual is going on! And if something unusual is going on, then those two probably aren't the only ones who suddenly turned up around here. ...What if there are others? ...Huh?”

Tree branches hanging over the path ahead began to rustle, and a few leaves fluttered to the ground. Instantly, Jeff jammed the throttle to full speed. The worn-out engine mustered the very last of its power, and with a loud chugging sound, it steadily puffed out exhaust fumes. But then...

“Waaugh!”

Monkey-like creatures with long, hairy arms suddenly swung down from the trees all around him. They were smaller than Jeff, but around the same size as some of the younger kids at his school. Their wide, blinking eyes sparkled with a powerful curiosity. Their noses quivered as they sniffed wildly. They must have caught the delicious scent of Jeff's cup noodles! One of them was holding a club, another was brandishing a bone, and yet another was wearing the skull of some animal that might have been a deer as a helmet. And there were about a hundred, no, maybe even two hundred more of them!

“Cavemen!” Jeff cried.

In a panic, he tossed the cup noodles aside. The agile creatures leapt down on them immediately, and then, as the heat burned their palms, they tossed the cup back and forth like a game of hot potato. One of the cavemen picked up some of the noodles that had fallen out onto the ground between his fingers, looked at them curiously for a moment, and then slurped them up from the bottom. This guy was really wolfing them down! The others noticed the incredibly satisfied look on his face, and suddenly every single caveman began to leap down from the trees. A fight soon broke out over the noodles. Jeff wondered just how many there were, and if they might try to jump down into the hyper-wheelchair. Some of them grabbed onto it or grazed it as they made their way to the ground. BEEP-BEEEEP! Jeff lay on the horn as hard as he could, and a cavemom carrying a cavebaby cried out in fear and froze on the spot.

“I don't have anything else, so get out of my way!” Jeff pleaded. “Please move, I don't want to run you over!” Steering in brilliant zig-zags with one hand, he was digging around in the storage compartment with the other. He thought if he could only find more food, he could throw it somewhere and draw the creatures away from him. But alas! The bread, the bananas, and all the rest of it had already been eaten up by that large man from before!

“Ahh, I'm sorry!” Jeff cried. Then, he untied the elastic rope holding the two extra tires to the back of the wheelchair. At the sight of these tumbling, rolling, bouncing, mysterious objects, a few of the cavemen who had begun chasing after Jeff shrieked and tried to run away. BEEP-BEEEEP! He scattered the crowd ahead with the horn as he went. Most of the creatures were fairly timid and fled, shivering with fear, but...oh no! Holding a thick log in his hands and blocking the road ahead was a noticeably stronger-looking caveman (though he was still smaller than Jeff), who seemed like he might have been the boss or leader of this group. He looked like a professional wrestler, his body shaped a bit like an upside-down triangle. His hairy chest seemed to be as thick as it was wide. He looked as if he wanted to challenge Jeff to a fight. His nostrils flared as he showed off his rippling muscles. Behind him was a group of cavegirls who were fairly pretty by cave-standards, with flowers fastened above their ears, or strings of seashells tied around their necks. They had their fists in the air and were crying out so forcefully in their loud, chittering voices that spit flew from their mouths as they cheered the boss caveman on like hysterical groupies.

“Gaaah, if I don't get out of here, this guy's gonna wipe the floor with me!” Jeff cried. “What will I do...what can I even do? ...Huh?” As his fingers fumbled desperately across the dashboard, he felt a small button hidden on the inner side. “What's this one?” he wondered. And of course, Jeff had to try pressing it! Just between us, being a lover of all things academic, Jeff had a healthier curiosity than most. And suddenly...

“Waaugh!”

Baaang! Bang-bang-baaang! Several small, round firecrackers went off, throwing puffs of smoke in various colors into the air. The hood snapped open like the lid of a jack-in-the-box, and out popped...a damp teddy bear?!

As the very flustered Jeff grabbed the bear's head to stop it from waving around, its hat flew off, trailing a seemingly endless string of flags from around the world! And then...from wherever they'd been hiding in the back of the wheelchair, empty tuna, spaghetti sauce, and Campbell's Alphabet Soup cans sprang out and dragged behind him, making loud rattling and clanking sounds as he went–like a “JUST MARRIED” couple's decorated car!

“...M...Maxwell must have done this...!” Jeff stammered. “Hahahahahaha!” Still clinging to the teddy bear, Jeff couldn't help but laugh. He had completely forgotten about it, but he realized now that this was the same hyper-wheelchair that Maxwell had used to pull pranks on everyone at a dormitory party some time ago. He had set it up in the display corner of the memorial hall with a sign that said, “Please Do Not Touch”. And then, whenever someone looked as though they were stealthily inching toward it in order to touch it (and yes, there was always someone...usually a refined-looking gentleman, or an old lady in fancy clothes)... All at once, that mischievous little bear would pop out of the hood, lights would flash and a siren would go off. Suddenly a combat team made up of the largest kids in the dormitory would appear in camouflage gear, and they'd fan out holding toy machine guns and shouting “Get on the ground with your arms and legs spread!” ...And now, in such a short amount of time, Maxwell had set up yet another prank without even knowing if Jeff would ever trigger it, and without being able to see his face and laugh at him if he did. ...Maxwell was really and truly more than just your average, run-of-the-mill genius!

Jeff was now in a far more cheerful mood thanks to all that, but...

...Getting back to that Macho Boss Caveman from before...he now found himself completely flabbergasted! There he was, just waiting for his chance to show these cavegirls something awesome... Ready to squash this frail, pathetic opponent, who couldn't even grow a proper coat of fur, like a bug... But his opponent had summoned some kind of mysterious henchman, had called forth excessively loud noises, and on top of all that, he was charging right for the mighty caveman boss, cackling with laughter the entire time! This guy had to be a sorcerer, or...no, a demon! The caveman boss trembled violently.

“GGRRAAAAAHHHHH!” he cried at last, as he struck a pose exactly like Edvard Munch's “The Scream”. Then, this macho caveman boss immediately turned tail and fled...much to the chagrin of his cavegirl groupies!

“I'm so sorry, please don't hold it against me!” cried Jeff, as he cowered behind the teddy bear and plowed steadily on through an absolute storm of angry booing. The string of national flags trailed behind him, and an orchestra of empty cans rang out as he went.

Finally, he made it through the crowd of cavemen. And the sky above cleared right up, too–what a beautiful day it had turned out to be!

“Oh, thank goodness,” Jeff sighed. “I was worried I might not get out of there in one piece. ...Huh? Uwwaaughh!”

Stomp-stomp-stomp-stomp-stomp! Something was chasing after him! He had made a fool of their beloved star, and now a vengeful, rampaging army of cavegirls was closing in on him, sending shock waves through the ground and kicking up dust as they went! And on top of that... “Hey! N-not now!” ...Sput, sputter, sputter~! Perhaps he had been pushing it too hard... The wheelchair, which he was relying on now more than ever, began to twitch and stutter as if it had a sudden cramp! The furious army of cavegirls ran as swiftly as Olympic athletes. With extreme expressions of fury, they mowed down any scrubs and branches in their way. They swung those long arms menacingly, and every now and then they even threw stones at their fleeing foe.

“Whoa–ow...ouch!” Jeff cried.

The cavegirls ripped the empty cans off the back of the wheelchair. They pulled at the string of national flags. They snatched away the teddy bear. Jeff was surrounded. They'd grab him any minute now! “Grahh!” Jeff cried, as he curled himself up and closed his eyes tightly. But just then...SPUTTER! The hyper-wheelchair wheezed out a puff of pure black smoke. The cavegirls began coughing violently! Seeing his opportunity, Jeff tried to speed up. Bang, bang-bang-bang, brrrrang-bang-bang! The muffler made a sound like a machine gun, and the trail of black smoke grew steadier. “This is bad!” Jeff cried. “There's fuel mixed in with the exhaust! ...If it gets too hot, it's gonna explo–uwaa–aaaaaugh!”

Suddenly, the ground disappeared from beneath him! The wind lifted Jeff's glasses off of his face as it whooshed by, and when he reached up to catch them, his body slipped out of the hyper-wheelchair! Without realizing it until it was far too late, he had been chased right off a cliff!

While the cavegirls laughed and screeched victoriously, Jeff spun through the air, falling down...down...down, until he got caught on a tree branch. A little bird who had been sitting on a nest full of eggs protested in a feisty voice, then fled indignantly. “Phew,” he sighed. “I'm safe–...whoa, wh-wh-wh-whoa, WAAAH!” Just as he'd finally felt some hint of relief...with a creak and a crack, the branch snapped under his weight, and he was falling again. This time, through all the greenery. “Oof...ahh! Ouch...owww!” The strong scent of freshly cut vegetation hung in the air as hundreds of leaves were torn from the branches all around him. Jeff continued to crash through the trees. Down...down...down he fell. He was struck by outstretched tree limbs, thrown against boulders... His body was scratched and scraped, and his clothes were severely torn. His mind was going hazy, and he could no longer feel his arms and legs. But at the very least, he managed to keep a firm hold on his glasses.

Oh...damn it, I can't believe it turned out like this, he thought.

I'm sorry, Tony. I'm sorry, Maxwell. I'm so sorry, friends I hadn't met yet...but I can't...go any farther...

Wham! Jeff bounced off an especially large rock, then he became very still. Still, and seemingly lifeless...

At the top of a certain, somewhat tall hill, there was silence, as if the hill itself were waiting motionlessly for something to happen, or as if it were holding its breath.

This was a place that anyone with even a passing interest in the mysterious Seven Wonders of the World would recognize from just a glance. It was known as Stonehenge. A place where it is believed that ancient people may have carried out religious celebrations and studied the constellations. It is one of only a few such places scattered throughout the world.

These twelve stone pillars, which created a perfect circle even so far apart from one another, were all the same height, strangely enough, despite retaining their naturally rough and rugged shapes. In the very center, on top of red clay earth which was so flat and even that it seemed as if it had been swept clean, there were six large, powerful-looking men wearing crude fur coats, all sitting in a circle facing one another. Their legs were crossed, and their eyes were closed. They were meditating quietly.

As time passed, the shadows of both the stones and the men shifted soundlessly, growing progressively longer. The sun sank behind a mountain to the west, and the landscape burned a fiery red.

Eventually, one of the men opened his eyes and stood up without a sound. Considering his size, his movements were surprisingly elegant and majestic.

Then, the next man got up. Then the next.

The six large men formed a line and walked down the hill. Even as they tread over dry leaves, their feet made no sound. In places thick with twigs and brush, not one thing snapped or rustled. Nothing seemed to hinder their solemn, reverent procession.

Before long, the men came to the foot of a steep cliff. Caught in the branches of a low bush, there was a small, torn, and crumpled flag bearing the emblem of a rising sun. The man at the head of the group gently took the flag between his fingers, and then he moved on. There was a tire. There was a pipe. There were the crushed, flattened remains of a wheelchair. And across from this, there was something white sticking up from the grass.

It was a hand. A youthful, human hand reaching out feebly, its fingers crooked as if trying to grasp at the air. Nearby, there was a pair of fallen glasses with broken lenses.

The men remained silent and gathered around the fallen boy. Motionlessly, they stared down at him.

His complexion was sickly and pale. His face was distorted with pain. His body seemed frail, and there were metal and leather devices strapped to his thin legs.

The men looked around at one another, then they nodded, silently.

One of the men leaned down and gently lifted the boy from the ground. He held the boy's small body in his arms as if he weighed nothing at all. As he turned to walk away, one of the other men held up a hand to stop him. This second man fished the broken glasses out of the grass and laid them on the young boy's chest. As if he understood what the man had done, the boy's long eyelashes fluttered weakly. And at that, the stony faces of those large men seemed to soften, if only very slightly.

Shooo......haaaa......shooo......haaaaa...

The first thing that returned to him was his sense of hearing.

He could hear a sound, with a constant and orderly rhythm. The sound of air being forced out, little by little, and then swiftly being sucked back in. It was as if he had entrusted his body to ocean waves. This sound seemed to cradle him, caress him, encourage him...and gradually, Jeff's consciousness returned to him.

I hear... I hear... A kind of nostalgic sound, he thought. ...The breathing of some kind of machine...

This is a bed... a hard bed... I'm lying on my back... I think I'm in a house... no... somewhere else... I must be in the dormitory...

No... It can't be...I left from there... And I went south...

I have to go south... As quickly as possible...!

Suddenly, he opened his eyes.

The first thing that came into view was the solid color of cream. Without his glasses the whole world was a blur, and no matter how hard he squinted he couldn't focus his eyes. Everything seemed strange, but once he strained his eyes a bit, he finally understood his situation a bit better. He was inside a transparent vinyl tent that opened with a zipper. The cream color he'd seen was the ceiling, which was higher than he would have guessed. Pipes of various thickness ran throughout the room. When he turned his head, he could see that the wall was relatively close on his right side, while to his left and past his feet the room spread out wide.

In the room were rows of gas cylinders in all different sizes, a door with a handle that looked a lot like the kind on a safe, a machine panel with blinking LED lights, a huge screen that took up a significant amount of space on one of the walls, a cylindrical computer, and a sign with an image of a man bowing, which highlighted safety practices with a green cross.

A factory? Jeff thought. A laboratory? No, a secret military base, maybe?

Just to the side of his head, a mechanical arm continued to pump air into the tent, keeping to its steady rhythm–shooo......haaaa......shooo......haaaaa. The gusts of very pure air would fluff up Jeff's smooth bangs and then push them back down flat again.

He tensed his arms and tried to sit up, but with a small “Oof,” he cringed and clutched his pained rib cage. As he tried to balance himself, he felt a very cold sensation on his backside. He froze with a sudden and unbearable amount of embarrassment. He was buck naked! He wasn't even wearing underwear! The aluminum, iron, and leather bracers were gone, and...what the?! Jeff's thin legs were bare, and yet they bent properly, and smoothly!

He reached out and touched them gently. He still couldn't see very well, so he had to investigate using his fingertips, and in the areas just above his knees, there appeared to be slight seams. His lower legs were solid and smooth, without one hint of a wound. Prosthetics...? Jeff thought, as he blinked his eyes in amazement. He slid his legs to the side and tried lowering them to the ground. He tried standing. ...They don't hurt, he thought. He tried bending them. He tried standing on tip-toe. He tried standing on one foot. He tried walking. And when he tried a little jump, his head hit the top of the tent! They don't hurt at all! he thought, joyously. And...and they're so light!

He could see a hazy but familiar shape on a tray beside him, so he tried picking it up in his hands. Sure enough, Jeff had found his trusty glasses! But when he put them on, they felt somehow lighter. The lenses seemed thinner than before, but they still suited his eyes perfectly!

He took the sheets off the bed and wrapped them around his body. Then he took hold of the tent's zipper and pulled it open.

Shoo......haaaaaaaa......shoo......haaaaa......

That noise he'd been hearing all this time suddenly became louder, along with the sounds of the other machines all around him. There was a high-pitched electronic beeping. An intermittent wwzshh...shh-shh-shh-shh sound, like a running printer. A low-frequency hummmm sound. A whhirrrrring sound, like a dentists' drill. And from just beyond a rather large computer, there came the faint sound of people talking. The voices were hushed and indistinct, and he couldn't tell what was being said, or who the speakers were.

As Jeff took a few steps forward, the soles of the bare prosthetic feet tread across the metal panels that made up the floor. They were slick and slippery, but he kept his balance. The black and perfectly level floor became like a dull mirror, reflecting back an image of the entire room, including Jeff, all alone in his white sheets and looking a bit like a sage from ancient Greece.

As he made his way around one of the cylinders, Jeff suddenly grabbed onto it and stopped dead in his tracks.

He could see a man in a white lab coat, his hair a disheveled mess of silvery-white, checking something on the circuit board he held in his hand. Even from behind, Jeff recognized him immediately. Standing stolidly across from him and facing toward Jeff was a man with a thick, rustic beard. He was wearing a plaid shirt and worn-down jeans, but there was something about him that reminded Jeff a lot of that large man whom he had helped with that painful burn. Sensing Jeff's gaze, this large man looked up quizzically, and the man in the white lab coat turned to see what had caught his eye. His glasses, which looked exactly like Jeff's, flashed in the light.

“Ah, so you're awake,” said the man.

“...P...Papa...?” Jeff replied, awkwardly. “W...what are you doing in a place like this?”

“This is my laboratory,” replied the silver-haired man–Dr. Petil von Andonuts–as he shrugged without a hint of a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Very good,” said Jeff, with a nod that was more like a twitch. “So it was you who fixed my legs, then. Thank you very much.”

“I created the prosthetic legs, yes, but the one who did the surgery was this fellow here,” said the doctor, and he pointed the pen he was holding toward the man with the thick beard. “This is Cro. He and his friends are the ones who found you and brought you here in the first place.”

“Very nice, meet you,” said Cro, with a relaxed smile. “Owe doctor, lot of thanks.”

“Oh I...I see,” replied the bewildered Jeff, and he tried to smile back at Cro, but he had suddenly become light-headed.

“Don't push yourself too hard just yet,” said the doctor, and returning the circuit board to a shelf, he caught the collapsing Jeff under his arms and helped him to stand. Cro quickly stepped forward and lifted the boy with surprising ease. He laid Jeff back down on the bed and gave him an injection in his arm.

“...Pa...Papa,” Jeff muttered, clutching the doctor's sleeve. “I...I have to...”

“Sleep, now,” said the doctor.

“I have to...apologize......to you...”

“It's alright, just sleep.”

Cro brought out a blanket from somewhere in the laboratory. Wrapped up in its clean, fluffy warmth, Jeff's consciousness began to slip away. His whispers barely made it past his lips as he faded into sleep. “I have to...apologize...”

Once, when Jeff was still a very young boy, he went with his father, his mother, and his beloved older brother Jack to a resort while on vacation.

They played around in the pool, visited an aquarium, then went shopping, and for dinner that night, they all went to a seafood restaurant on the harbor just as the sun was setting. A terribly lavish barbecue had been set out on a seaside deck swept by the salty sea breeze. Darkness fell as the round and fiery sun hid itself beyond the horizon, and the cooking fires crackling here and there only enhanced the romantic atmosphere. Jack and Jeff gorged themselves on anything within arm's reach until their bellies were full. Their mother and father, however, only sipped beautifully colored cocktails, held hands over the table, and stared into each other's eyes. Their plates were completely untouched. There was no sign that they would be getting up from their chairs any time soon.

“Hey...I wanna leave. I'm bored,” Jeff began to whine.

“Shhh, don't bother them,” said Jack, pulling on Jeff's sleeve. “Hey, why don't you come with your big brother for a little while? Look, over by that pier, you see that cool cruiser boat? Come on, I'll take you over there, and we can check it out.”

“No way!” Jeff cried, happily. And just like that, his sullen mood vanished. “Let's go!”

They ran through tall shadows cast by palm trees. Bathed in the harbor lights, that large and impressive cruiser bobbed lightly on the waves. Men and women dressed in fancy clothes were enjoying themselves at the ship's launching party. A live band was playing high-spirited music. A waiter in a white apron and a woman in a bathing suit complete with bunny ears and a matching tail were busily dashing to and fro with food and drinks.

“...This is so awesome!” said Jack.

“I want to ride on it, big bro!” cried Jeff.

A man in a Hawaiian shirt was smoking a cigarette out on the ship's deck, and before long he noticed the two small siblings staring at the boat with their mouths wide open in awe. The man was wearing a gold watch that looked very expensive. “What's wrong, little ones?” he called to them. “Did this boat catch your eyes?” Jack and Jeff nodded, entranced, and the man smiled. He seemed to be one of the party guests. “Well then, come on in!” The man lifted the boys up one after the other and pulled them aboard.

“My, my, what adorable little passengers I have!” said a man in a skipper's hat and a fancy navy blue jacket, who introduced himself as the captain. He led them on a tour of the whole ship–the compact galley, the soft and fluffy beds in the guest cabin, his wonderful seashell collection, the captain's quarters, the game room, and the wheelhouse. Jack, still in a state of awe, could only say, “wow...wow...!” over and over again. Jack loved boats and ships, and had even put together an intricate, detailed model of the RMS Queen Elizabeth II all by himself.

Having seen pretty much all there was to see, Jack began to ask the captain complicated and very specific questions. He was also able to make pointed observations that weren't expected of a child. “Oh, I suppose you're right–I'm very impressed!” the captain cried, in admiration. Everyone began to gather excitedly around Jack and the captain. Jeff was eventually pushed out of the circle.

“...Big brother,” he whined, but Jack didn't seem to hear him. He appeared to be in an enthusiastic daze as he chatted with everyone else. “Big brotherrr! ...Uuggh.”

For a short while Jeff wandered around by himself, but when no one seemed to take notice of him, he stormed out of the room in a huff. He wandered out onto the pitch-dark deck. He could hear lively music and laughter coming from the direction of the stern, which was bathed in lights, but there was no one on the silent bow. The ocean was in total darkness, and small, triangular waves billowed out into the distance.

“...Uggh...I'm so bored!” Jeff moaned.

There was a metal fitting in the shape of a ring fastened to the very tip of the bow. Jeff squatted down and fiddled with the ring. There was nothing attached to it now, but it was most likely used to moor the boat. They would probably tie a rope to it, and they would also probably use one of those sailor's knots that his big brother was so fond of. He had shown Jeff how to tie one of those special, tricky knots just the other day, in fact.

“Even I can do one of those,” Jeff boasted. He plopped himself down, pulled the cord out from the waistline of his parka, and threaded it through the ring. He tried to tie it just as he had been taught. ...But it didn't work out so well.

“It looks weird,” he muttered. “...You put this part through here...no, not like that...”

As I have already mentioned, Jeff was a lover of all things academic. On top of that, he was never satisfied unless he gave something his absolute all. He pulled at the strings from his hood and tried the knot again. “So, this part...goes like this...ohh, now it's all tangled...hey, hey! ...Oh, this is too tight!”

Meanwhile...

“...Thank you very much,” said Jack, as he solidly shook the kindly boat captain's large hand. “I learned a lot today.”

“Come back again sometime!” the captain replied, smiling brightly. “But next time, please try to talk a little slower.”

“Sure thing!” said Jack, blushing. Then, he suddenly realized that he hadn't seen Jeff in quite some time. “Ohh, Jeff,” he said, with a hint of exasperation. “Where did he get off to, now?!”

The ship was about to dock. The party guests were already preparing to disembark. The ship's crew was unraveling the mooring rope and preparing to lift the anchor.

“If we don't get back soon, papa and mama are going to worry,” said Jack. “Jeff! Jeff, where are you?”

He ran as he searched the ship. “Don't tell me he...!” Jack leaned over the railing and looked down at the dark water below. He questioned everyone who happened to pass by. They only shook their heads at him. He finally thought to look toward the bow, and to his surprise, there was Jeff! He seemed to be struggling, caught in what appeared to be a sort of snare, and he looked as though he was on the verge of tears.

“Nghh...br...other......brother!” Jeff cried. “H...help me...gghh...”

“Jeff! What happened?”

“I c...can't...untie it......aaah! Waahh!”

“Don't cry!” said Jack. “I'll try to help.”

Jack got to his knees and quickly began trying to untie the knots in the string. But his reckless and stubborn little brother had pushed and pulled this string from every possible direction. There was no way he could ever untangle it. It would have been helpful if he'd had a knife on him, but at school he was taught never to walk around with dangerous objects!

“Damn...I can't do this,” Jack confessed, as he stood up. “Just hang on a minute, I'll go get someone who can help.”

“Broth...brother, no, don't go!” cried Jeff.

And just then...

The party's mood lighting went dim, and in its place, pow! The marina suddenly lit up, and all the ship's lights came on at once. The captain, who was near the window of the wheelhouse, looked out onto the bow. Expecting it to be empty, he was surprised to see the two boys cowering there, dazzled by the sudden brightness. He turned to the side to yell something at someone, in as loud a voice as he could, but the orchestra's performance was at its peak, and–BANG-BANG!–fireworks had begun to go off, as well. VRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! The engine gave out an ear-splitting roar. The boat suddenly veered, and...WHAM! It rocked violently.

“Gyaah!” Tiny Jeff flew up into the air, and–rrrip!–the sleeve tore from his parka, and the drawstrings finally snapped. Now that he was free of the tangled string, Jeff slid across the deck on his backside. He was about to fall overboard!

“JEEEEEEFF!”

His big brother Jack ran to him, holding out his arms...and then, as if he feared nothing at all, he kicked off the deck and jumped. Bang, bang, BAAANG! Fireworks painted the night sky and the panicked faces of the captain and the helmsman in brilliant colors. In mid-air, the older brother's hand reached the younger brother's, gripped it tight, and pulled him in close. Held him tight against his chest. The ship lurched wildly toward them. It was swinging back the other way!

“Big broth...” The words froze in Jeff's throat. Jack smiled warmly. ...So warmly... And then... THUD...!

“UWAAAAAUUGGHH!”

Jeff was frightened by the intensity of his own cries.

There was a horrifying sound as both of his legs were crushed to the knee between the three thousand ton cruiser and the beams of the dock. A horrifying sensation. His big brother had gone as expressionless as a doll, and a single streak of red trickled from his ear. That red streak gradually dulled to black as Jeff's world lost all color, and it began to dim, then to fade out entirely. And then...

He could remember it all... The wailing siren of the ambulance. Being hurried through a hospital hallway on a stretcher. His mama, collapsing to the floor and sobbing. His papa's hair, which had gone white in just one night. Being told for the first time that he would have to use crutches for the rest of his life. ...And the funeral for Jack, who had only been fifteen years old.

“...Big brother,” Jeff had sobbed, his cheeks soaked with tears. “I said I was sorry...but no matter how sorry I am, it's too late now...”

Jeff changed schools and went to live at the dormitory. He wanted to distance himself from the people who had known him and his family, who remembered his family when it had been whole. His mother and father got divorced, probably for similar reasons. Without Jack, the three of them could not bear to continue living together as though nothing had happened. The household had been torn apart. His father paid for his tuition, and his mother sent him cards at Christmas, but that was about it. That was the current state of Jeff's family.

“...It's...too late now,” said Jeff, and he smiled in a lonely and distant way. But just then...

<...Jeff...where are you?> cried a voice, in his mind. <Where are you?! You have to come help us...come, quickly! We're begging you, Jeff!>

“Damn it...that's right!” Jeff cried, and in a panic, he jumped to his feet.

How much time had he lost? This time...this time...he wouldn't let it be too late. He ran across the laboratory floor. He ran up one flight of stairs, and down another. Here and there he opened doors and peered through windows. He never even realized that he was no longer relying on handrails, or how light and agile he had become, or the amazing speed at which he was running. He hadn't realized that he had put on his shirt and pants all on his own. The only thought on his mind was that he had to find those Warriors as soon as possible.

...There he was! Jeff finally found the doctor in a dome-shaped room on the top floor that looked like an astronomical observatory. Together with Cro, he was fiddling with some kind of spherical machine.

“Papa!” Jeff cried.

“Feeling better, eh?” the doctor replied, as he turned around slowly. “I thought it might be about time for you to wake up.”

“I'm sorry,” said Jeff. “I don't really have time to explain everything. But I have to go, right now! I have friends out there who need my help!”

“In Eagleland...Threed, right?” said the doctor, with a nod. “I've already set that as your destination. This Sky Runner was a rush job and it's not quite finished yet, so it can't travel any terribly long distances, but it should be able to get you to Threed, at least.”

“How...?” said Jeff, his eyes opening wide. “How did you know? How did you know I need to get to Threed?”

“Cro, see it, in dream,” said Cro, putting his hand to his chest. “Jeff will ride. Leave, soon.”

Still unsure of just what was going on, Jeff got into the machine that was apparently called the Sky Runner. His heart was pounding, but, first things first, he got into the pilot's seat and looked over the cockpit.

He pressed a button labeled “Power”, and a giant display monitor rose up in front of him. “[Please review the commands],” said a robotic voice. The armrests of the seat opened up with a clatter, and under both his left and right hands, things that looked a bit like Super Nintendo controllers had appeared. “[Use the D-pad to make a selection, press the A button to confirm, and press the B button to cancel,]” said the robotic voice. “[X and Y will display options. Press the L and R buttons simultaneously to bring up the 'Help' screen.]” Jeff scrolled through the menu and found an option for “Take-off Preparation”. He selected it with “A”.

The Doctor's voice came in through the craft's speakers. “I'll send that thing you were riding in before back to the Maurice school once I've repaired it,” he said. “Do your best out there.”

“Th...thank you,” Jeff replied, faltering a bit. Then, did his best to speak clearly. “Father...I'm glad we met again like this. And...I'm sorry, too. Cro, thank you so much! Well then, I'm off!”

The domed roof opened up all at once. What began as nothing but a thin band of blue suddenly unfurled into a dazzling sky that spread wide above him. At that moment, Jeff realized that the remnants of cloudy hesitation that had been lurking in the depths of his consciousness had disappeared, and his mind was now as clear as that boundless, blue sky. And at that same moment, he had a revelation. Cro was of the same species as that large man whose burn he had cared for. He wondered if Cro might not be the only one in that tribe of rugged and primitive men who had developed such an extraordinary level of intelligence.

...A new strain, Jeff thought. Or maybe he came from the past? Could he be an ancient ancestor of mankind...?

Still perplexed, Jeff was jostled suddenly as the engine bellowed and the jets fired up. Sky Runner, liftoff!

Back in that gloomy, sinister little room, two figures sat side-by-side in the corner. Ness lifted his face, darkened by dust and exhaustion, and his feverish, nervous eyes seemed empty and distant. Paula was resting her elbows on her raised knees, holding her chin in her hands with a very absent-minded expression on her pale, waxen face.

“...I wonder...if he's really...coming,” Ness muttered very quietly, as if he were only talking to himself. Startled, Paula turned toward him. Ness felt a little awkward, but he knew he just had to come out and say it. “This...Jeff guy...are you sure you're actually getting through to him?”

“Of course I'm getting through to him,” Paula replied, scowling at Ness. “And he's coming. I know it, he's coming!”

“But then, why hasn't he given you any sort of reply?”

“Because he can't,” Paula explained. “Jeff has no PSI abilities at all. But, he's a terribly smart and very brave boy. He has more scientific knowledge than almost any adult out there. And mechanical engineering is his specialty. I know that much.”

“That's not what I'm trying to ask,” said Ness, looking somewhat annoyed as he gestured with his hands. “My question is...do you really think he wants to team up with us? I'm kind of your average sort of kid, and when I first heard Buzz Buzz calling to me, I thought I might be crazy. If this guy, who is so good with science and machinery and who doesn't have a shred of PSI ability himself, suddenly started hearing your voice calling out to him in his mind...would he believe it? Would he really go through all the hassle of traveling overseas just because he thought he heard the pleas of some person he's never met?”

“He's coming!” Paula cried. And she was very obstinate at the start. “I'm sure he's...he's coming.” ...But with confidence fading from her eyes, she finally turned away from Ness. “...He's com...ing,” she repeated softly, and then her head drooped. Her eyes, which she tried so hard to keep open, had a watery shimmer to them.

Oh no, she was crying! Flustered, Ness hugged her around her shoulders.

“I'm sorry!” he said. “I'm so sorry, Paula, don't cry! I wasn't trying to be mean.”

“............”

“It's just, my stomach hurts a little bit,” Ness went on, “and...and I...I have to be honest here, the truth is......I've really had to go to the bathroom almost this entire time. I feel like I'm really reaching my limits, here. So if he doesn't get here soon, I might–”

“Don't say any more!” Paula cried, and she covered her ears and shivered. “You're not the only one dealing with that! A-a-and try to think of how it feels for a girl!”

“Oh, whaaaat?” Ness laughed, feeling a bit relieved. “You too, huh?”

“I figured that was obvious!” said Paula. “We've been in here for more than a whole day now!”

“...Yeah, I guess you're right, this is pretty bad,” Ness replied. “Well, how about this. What if, just this once, we both close our eyes and go to that corner over there, and we–”

“I can't do that!” Paula cried, and she stood up and began pacing in circles, unable to calm herself down. “You can be so inconsiderate sometimes, Ness! If you're in that much of a hurry, why don't we call out to him again, together?! That sort of concentration takes a lot of energy, and you always leave me to do it all on my own!”

“I've been praying!” said Ness, and he got to his feet, too. “I've been doing my absolute best to call out to him. But, the truth is...I guess I don't really know how to do it.”

“Then you should have said something earlier!”

“But you were concentrating so hard,” said Ness. “I didn't want to get in your way.”

“Graah, if you're going to be considerate, why can't you do it in a way that's actually useful?” Paula hissed.

“Tch...typical hysterical girl,” Ness grumbled.

“Are you trying to start a fight, now?!”

There in the dark, the two of them faced each other with a growl, but suddenly...

Shooom! The room began to shake. It felt as if something heavy had crashed into the roof. “What was that?” said Ness, as he held his hand over his head to protect himself from the softly falling dust.

“Could it be...?” cried Paula. With her eyes sparkling hopefully, she looked up at the ceiling.

Crash! ...And then the leg of some sort of machine, very sturdy-looking and metallic, burst down through it! Paula screamed. Crack! A wooden beam snapped in half, and fragments of the roof rained down on them. Ness took Paula into his arms and leapt aside desperately, just as...ccrrrracckk, cruunnch, wha-whaam!...some huge, round, half-destroyed thing fell through and landed right where they had been standing. Through the crumbling gap in the collapsed roof, they could see the sky. It was covered in dark, gloomy clouds, but nevertheless, it was definitely the sky!

“...Whoops, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!” Crawling out from under the wrecked door of this contraption came a thin boy with glasses. “That was really bad, oh man,” said the boy. “I didn't give it the proper landing command. ...So I guess it had no choice but to crash.”

With a friendly grin, the boy offered his hand to the other two, who still looked pretty stunned.

“I'm Jeff,” he said. “And...you're the ones who have been calling out to me, right?”

“Oh!” Ness cried. He stood up quickly, wiped his dusty palms on the seat of his pants, and held out his hand. “Welcome, Jeff! I'm glad you came. I'm Ness.”

“And I'm Paula. It's nice to meet you, I'm so happy to see you!”

The three of them piled their hands on top of one another. Ness and Paula had finally met their precious new friend!

“Well, Jeff, I know this is kinda sudden,” Ness began, “but...we need a key to this door.”

“Do you think you can use your scientific knowledge to open it...?” Paula added.

“An electronic key, huh,” said Jeff, thoughtfully. “...Just leave it to me!” He pulled a toolbox out of the ruined Sky Runner, and pried off the faceplate from around the doorknob using a screwdriver. He then used a pair of lineman's pliers to snip the rainbow-colored ribbon of wires that appeared from beneath it, connected that to a small number-pad device, keyed something into it, and...ping! Suddenly there was the sound of a lock being released!

Ness and Paula were so stunned that they couldn't help but applaud.

“...No, no,” said Jeff, bashfully. “This sort of thing, it's nothing...it's really nothing, and I–huh?” The second Jeff pulled that door open, the other two flew past him at an incredible speed. “Hey, where are you going? Don't leave me behind!”

…But I don't have to tell you where those two ran off to in such a hurry, now, do I?

Chapter 5 – The Worst Battle in All of History

If you were to follow this clear, trickling stream, glittering in the dappled sunlight deep in these lush, green mountains, climbing higher and then higher still, eventually you would come to the water's source, or its headwaters, or whatever you'd call it. And there you'd find a strikingly beautiful scene where rushing water surges forcefully over the edge of a steep cliff.

This part of Saturn Valley, just on the outskirts of Threed, where a refreshing and strangely citrusy scent hangs in the air, is aptly known as Grapefruit Falls.

A lone woman, with hair as black as raven feathers cascading down her back, was running along this rocky riverside in such a frantic hurry that she was practically tripping over herself. She was carrying a large pot in her arms. She clambered over the moss-covered boulders, her long, flowing, old-fashioned clothes thoroughly soaked, and when she finally came right up beside the falls, she plunged directly into that thick wall of water without even the slightest hesitation. Surprisingly, the area behind the waterfall was completely hollow! And this was no natural cave–the space inside looked like some sort of factory. That was because this waterfall wasn't originally a waterfall–it was the overflow of a man-made dam.

The woman continued hurriedly down a dimly lit corridor inside the dam, leaving a trail of wet footprints behind her. That citrusy scent wafting in the air on the other side of the waterfall, which smelled so delicious it would make any dry throat instinctively gulp, gradually faded away and was replaced by an indescribably nauseating odor. While it pains me even to try to come up with any comparisons, it was like the stagnant air of a public restroom that hadn't been cleaned in a really, really long time. It stung the eyes and made one's nose itch–the kind of stench that can cause you to deeply regret taking a breath once you've inhaled it.

But this woman appeared to be perfectly fine with it. In fact, she seemed to be relying on that unsettling odor to guide her, always hurrying in whichever direction the stench seemed to grow stronger.

Being careful not to drop the pot, she went down a flight of stairs. When she came to a thin walkway just to the side of a trough of fast-flowing, murky water, she broke into a half-run. Finally she came to a certain door, and only then did the woman stop running. She knocked. She took hold of the knob, and she pulled the door open. Like steam escaping from a boiling pot when the lid is removed, that atrocious stench flooded out with a terrible amount of force.

🎵Eenie, meenie, miney, mo!

Inside the room, there was something on a slightly elevated stage, bathed in cocktail lights and singing into a microphone. Its voice was terribly off-key and gravelly, and its vocalizations seemed like random nonsense. Apparently, the lyrics were all improvised–a vague, terrible impersonation of a song.

🎵If the one in Loch Ness is Nessie,

🎵And the one in Lake Tess is Tessie,

🎵And the one in Chesapeake is Chessie,

🎵Why is the one in Lake Erie Bessie?

It was unbelievably disgusting–a thing so awful it just shouldn't be. If there's an area near your school or your home that happens to contain a significant number of drinking establishments, haven't you ever seen a puddle of that...sticky-looking stuff, maybe along the side of the road or near a telephone pole, and usually in the morning...? The kind of puddle you would avoid walking near, at any cost? ...Maybe someone would end up stepping in it, and no matter how close your friendship was with that person, you would have no choice but to avoid them like the plague? Or, in the very unlikely event you were to slip and fall into it, you would have to run home as fast as you could, tear off your clothes, and jump into the bath...screaming the entire time? Well, it was that. A human-sized pile of that.

Now please imagine that, but with bizarrely adorable eyes, thick, luscious lashes, and a huge, gooey, pliant mouth (with an especially impressive upturned bottom lip!), if you can. That was it. That was the “thoroughly disgusting, nasty character from somewhere in outer space”, Belch!

🎵A bear is only a bear,

🎵An elk is just an elk, but I'm Belch!

🎵Oh yeah, oh yeah!

🎵Get out, get out!

🎵I'm Belch!

“Oh yeah, oh yeah, barf, barf, I'm Belch, alright!”

“Master Belch! Master Belch!”

Belch was totally intoxicated by his own singing voice when that woman from before approached him. ...Isn't that awful? What if she accidentally stepped on even just the slightest part of the very edge of...that?!

“Oh yeah, oh yeah, barf, barf...grah? What the?” cried Belch. “Who dares interrupt the spectacular hook to this incredible song? ...Ah, well, look who it is–if it isn't our prettiest zombie. Hork-wharf! And what's this?” Belch spotted the jar that the woman was holding out so proudly, and suddenly ripples of joy spread throughout his entire body. “Buurp! So you finally found it? The Fly Honey?!”

“Y-yes sir–!”

“Hork-barf (Bring it here)!”

The woman held the pot out to him reverently, and Belch came slipping and sliding down off the stage in a very unsettling manner. From somewhere within Belch's body, where it was hard to tell just where his face ended and his belly began, protrusions that looked like tentacles suddenly sprang forth. Shlapp! With a soggy sound, they wrapped around the pot and he swiftly pulled it close, and then...aaah! He opened his mouth wide and poured the honey straight in. But as soon as he did...

“Grah...ugyeh-yeh-yeh...ptooey, ptooey! You (barf!) fool!” he coughed. “This isn't Fly Honey! This is just regular honey! Hork-wharf!”

Craaash! He threw the pot at the bewildered woman, and with a scream, she shrank back and tried to dodge it.

“Burp-hork, this is awful!” Belch moaned. “Ohh, I'm so miserable, borf-barf... Master Belch is so miserable... All I want is to eat Fly Honey... Sticky, sweet, nutritious Fly Honey... Ohh, I want it, I want it, I want it!”

Mournfully, Belch crawled back up onto the stage, turned the mic volume as high as it would go, and with a powerful, satisfying echo, he began crying, “I JUST WANT TO EAT FLY HONEY~!” in a pitch fit for a Rock 'n Roll song.

“But...but, Master Belch!” cried the woman. Stumbling from the sharp pain in her ears, blinking profusely, and pulling at the sticky, translucent, golden honey she was now covered in, she looked up at him earnestly. “Unfortunately, this honey that you speak of...it cannot be found anywhere around here! I have come to believe that the flies on this planet do not even make honey! ...Gyahh!”

Belch had torn off a piece of himself and had thrown it. It hit the woman's face with a terrible glop! sound.

“Silence, liar!” he roared. “Do not attempt to deceive me, horf-barf! Because I can smell it. I can smell Master Belch's beloved Fly Honey, festering and spewing!”

“But where? Where can I find it?” cried the woman as she writhed before him, covered in both honey and the discarded, gooey chunk of Belch's body. “If you can just tell me that, I'll go out looking for it again! I'll go out as many times as you need me to!”

“BUARP! Enough is enough!” Belch declared. “I'm going to have someone else do it. Even after all the hassle I went through bringing you back from your grave, you vomitous failure...I'm going to...I'm going to...kill you all over again! ...Borf-borf-borf...BUURP!”

“Aaaaiiieee!”

Belch's eyes blinked furiously as his pliable, flapping lips stretched forward and pointed at the tip like the spout of a tea kettle. Suddenly he spat out some sort of mulberry-colored liquid! Doused from head to toe, the woman let out a high-pitched scream as her body began to twitch and convulse. Soon, like a wax dummy thrown into an open fire, she was no longer such an attractive-looking zombie at all. Shortly after that, she was only a skeleton. Finally, she melted down into nothing more than a syrupy goop. In the middle of the disgustingly-colored zombie puddle oozing out across the floor, the woman's eyes–the only parts of her that were still left intact–blinked resentfully. As the rising steam whispered her grudges, it added its own nuance to that indescribable odor filling the room. ...And then at last, she dissolved entirely.

“Braaap!” Belch let loose a satisfied burp. “Blarha-blarha, serves you right,” he cackled. “Making me believe I was about to eat my favorite thing, Fly Honey...and thanks to you, I forgot the cheery phrase I had just come up with for the next part of the song. ...Uuhhmm...now where was I...oh yes, blarhey blarhe~y......” (This was the sound of him warming up his voice.) “🎵A horse is a horse, until today, of course...huh? No, I don't think that was it, hork-horf... I'm so angry, gurgle-barf...”

And now we change scenes again–back to Threed.

Finally feeling more at ease, Ness and his friends explored the dark, gloomy streets of Threed. As they went, they engaged in tense battles with creepy marionettes like Smilin' Sam and Handsome Tom, and nasty little ghosts who would possess them if they weren't careful. At long last they made their way to a park in the middle of town. A large circus tent had been set up there, and many of the townspeople had gathered inside it, seeking refuge.

“My house is completely uninhabitable,” a man sobbed, with an exhausted look on his face. “I can hear footsteps and laughter coming from upstairs when no one is up there, and there are knocking sounds on the walls and ceilings. And when my wife took some meat out of the fridge to prepare it for dinner, it got up and crawled away!”

“Poltergeist activity,” Jeff replied. “It's a fairly common complaint.”

“But this was a prime T-bone steak that cost ten dollars an ounce!” cried his wife. She dabbed at her face with a handkerchief as Paula tried to comfort her.

“My pet guppy suddenly turned into a piranha!”

“I went to take a shower and blood came out of the faucet! It was so creepy!”

“A wall in my basement suddenly collapsed, and a black cat jumped out and danced the tango!”

“That's nothing! My son became a goalie on the ice hockey team at his school! And to make matters worse, he's taken up carpentry as a hobby!”

“Okay, okay, everyone calm down,” Ness interjected. “Just when did all these things start happening? And does anyone have any idea why these things might be going on?”

The people of the town went silent and glanced around at one another, and then their gazes began to wander as if they were looking for someone in particular. Then, like the Red Sea being parted by Moses, the crowd suddenly split in two, and seated at the other end of the divide was a woman. She was a pleasantly plump old lady, with a Persian cat sitting in her lap.

“...My name is Miss Maple,” said the woman. “I've studied astronomy for many, many years, now.” She smiled faintly as her ring-laden fingers caressed the head of the cat, which looked quite regal and wore a very snooty expression. Softly, she continued to tell her tale. “I believe it was at the end of last month. A large comet fell near Mount Onett, far to the north of here. At that same time, vast amounts of powdery stardust fell upon Saturn Valley, to the east of our town. 'This is a sign of bad things to come,' I told everyone. For you see, I have also been into fortune-telling for many, many years. And, as is always the case, my prediction came true once more. Yes, true indeed! Many strange things have been happening, no one can deny it. And it all started right after that!”

“Saturn Valley, huh,” said Ness. “That's strange. Let's go check it out!” And just like that, he turned to dash from the tent.

“Wait!” Paula cried. “We can't just leave all these people like this!”

“She's right. You're very impatient, you know,” Jeff added. “Let me think for a minute. ...Hmmm. ...Taking into account the Josephson junction of the Minsky hypothesis, if we multiply planetary body X by dimensional fault coefficient α, allow substitutions for the Helms regional variations, and apply an amorphous direct current SQUID...” Pacing in circles, Jeff muttered some incredibly complicated-sounding things to himself, until finally he stopped in his tracks and shook his head in defeat. “It's no use,” he sighed. “...In theory it's sound, but I can't sort out the precise values on it. Working it out in my head, it would take no less than thirty seven days to determine this calculation. If only we had a high-capacity computer...”

“...What calculation?” asked Ness.

“The frequency,” Jeff replied. “If we can find a way to broadcast a specific audible wavelength, it may attract the zombies and ghosts no matter how far away they are, like how a moth is drawn to certain pheromones. We can lure them in and then trap them all at once. In other words, it would be something like those alluring but sticky paper traps for insects...a Zombie Paper trap, so to speak.”

“Zombie Paper?” The people in the tent looked at Jeff with very apparent disbelief written all over their faces. “Can you really make something like that?”

“Why not?” Jeff replied, shrugging his shoulders. “If we gather all the zombies and ghosts in one spot and trap them there somehow, then you can all go home and relax, right?”

“Certainly, absolutely, definitely–please make that for us!” the townspeople all cried in unison.

“...But, like I said...I can't calculate the exact numbers on it right now,” said Jeff, quite apologetically. But just then...

...Brrrrrriinnngggg! Something went off in Ness's backpack.

“Oh, it's that phone thing!” Ness cried, and he opened his bag and took out that strange little device that could only receive calls. “Yes, hello!”

“Ness, how are you?” Apple Kid's cheerful voice rang out over the speaker. “I know this is pretty sudden, but that amazing, world-famous scientist Dr. Andonuts has decided to return from his life of seclusion, and he's calling on folks from all over the world to collaborate with him. He's teaming up to fight the very same enemy you guys are fighting! This is great, isn't it? I thought I should tell you about it right away!”

“Kid?!” cried Jeff, and he suddenly snatched the phone away from Ness. “Is this really Apple Kid, the inventor? It's me, Jeff, the bread connoisseur with the lightning serve, we used to chat all the time over the Maurice School's science SIG!”

“Wow, really?” Kid replied. “Well, hello, then! What are you doing over there?”

“I have a favor to ask!” Jeff cried. “Input the following equation into your terminal! It's an emergency!”

“Huh? Well, sure,” said Apple Kid. “...What is it?”

In one breath, Jeff relayed all the information necessary to calculate the formula. Apple Kid may have seemed pretty laid-back, but apparently he could be very quick when the need arose. In no time at all, they had the calculation ready.

Jeff refashioned his alma mater's necktie into a headband, and then he went through all of the household items the townspeople had brought into the tent. He took a combination Radio CD/Cassette player, an electric guitar, and a car battery...and also things that any ordinary person couldn't have imagined he'd find a use for, like a frying pan, a cat's flea collar, and a tennis racket. In the end, he'd put together something that looked like a bizarre music box. “I did it!” he cried, triumphantly.

“This is it?” said Ness.

“This is...'Zombie Paper'...?” Paula added.

“Yup,” Jeff replied, grinning widely. “Now, help me set it up!”

They planned to use the tent itself as their 'Zombie Paper' trap. The townspeople of Threed watched, half in disbelief, as Ness and Jeff climbed a ladder and installed that secret little device Jeff had just put together onto a pole at the center of the tent. “Almost there...a little to the right, to the right!” said Paula, as she directed them from below. “Okay, that's just about dead center!”

Ness and Jeff looked at one another and nodded. Jeff yanked out the pull ring to start the specially-crafted engine, and Ness opened the lid of the music box. Then they both practically flew back down to the ground and folded up the ladder.

Gulping nervously, the townspeople all had the same anxious look on their faces as they strained their ears to listen. Deep down, they were all feeling quite disappointed, but none of them had the heart to voice their concerns. They didn't hear anything–not one little thing. ...Maybe Jeff's invention hadn't worked?

“It's alright, it's working as intended,” Jeff explained, a bit indignantly. “It's beyond the hearing range of a human being–in other words, it's making a sound that you can't hear with your own ears. The digital meter indicates that it has been set within the proper range. The hard work is done, and now we just have to wait for the results!”

Everyone hurried out of the tent and hid behind the hedges or in clusters of trees. They kept still and held their breath...and they waited.

And before too long...

“Wah, they're coming!”

“Shh!”

“W-whoa, holy cow, they just keep coming!”

...They sure did! It was just as that guy had said. Zombies, zombies, and more zombies! My goodness, there were so many of them! There were zombies all over the place. A mass of monsters, a gathering of ghouls...zombies on parade!

Some were wearing clothes that looked like tattered old rags, some held their arms out in front of themselves as if they were just learning how to walk, one was so thin and dried out that it looked like nothing but a skeleton, one was carrying its head in its hands, one had an axe stuck in its skull, a few lost pieces of themselves with just about every step, two zombies who seemed to be stuck together at their heads hopped forward in unison...and so on and so on. As if they'd walked straight out of a horror movie, the horde kept coming one after another, each of them fighting to get into the tent ahead of the others. In their mad rush, they would bump into one another or trip and fall, ending up in piles on the ground. There were some who were so slow and listless that they were constantly being overtaken by the zombies coming up behind them, and there were others who had a hard time getting into the tent and were being enthusiastically trampled by the rest. They all seemed so miserable, so confused. It was truly a pitiful scene.

The ruckus continued for about half an hour. In the end, the entire zombie procession had been drawn into the tent. The town suddenly felt so empty. With a quiet whoooosh, a lonely gust of wind howled through the streets. It felt just like the few tense moments after the curtains finally rise for a concert in a huge venue. The tent was so full that the sides of it bulged and squirmed restlessly.

The townspeople came out from where they had been hiding, cautiously approached the tent, and peeked in.

“Ha-haa! It's totally filled with zombies! All kinds of zombies...like undead canned sardines!”

“Damn, and they had the nerve to try to frighten so many people...!”

“So what should we do now? ...Set this whole thing on fire?”

“No, please don't do that, it would be such a waste!” cried a voice. Suddenly the mayor, who was all dressed up in a gaudy, pink tailcoat, was handing out flyers to everyone.

The flyers read, “The Hidden Gem Zombie House–A competitive face-off to find our next delightful and mischievous Horror Star!”

“We'll distribute these all over the world!” said the mayor, with pure joy on his face. “The tourists will come in droves. This park is pretty spacious–we'll build a roller coaster, and a Ferris wheel! Our very own Threed will become the first town in the whole world able to boast of a theme park with real, live zombies!”

“I can see it now!”

“That might be a good idea.”

Applause broke out. Most of the townspeople seemed to approve. “We can't do that!” cried a lady from the PTA. “That would be glorifying violence! It would be a bad influence on our children!” ...But the excited townspeople didn't seem to hear her.

“You did it, Jeff!” said Ness.

“Yeah, you're really very clever!” added Paula.

Their praise seemed to make Jeff very bashful.

Now that such a great deal of the zombies had been captured, the city was much easier to walk through. Most of the townspeople went back to their homes. Everyone worked together to clean the streets, which had become filthy and putrid. The hotel that had been damaged by the Sky Runner was eventually repaired and re-opened under its original, proper management.

...But things had not been settled entirely. For starters, something still needed to be done about the gloomy atmosphere and the heavily clouded skies.

“Alright, well, let's go!” said Ness, clenching his fist.

“...To Saturn Valley!” Jeff added, holding his glasses by the rim and adjusting them slightly.

“Err...I guess so,” said Paula, quietly.

“Huh? What's wrong, Paula?” said Ness.

“You look so upset,” added Jeff.

“...Well, I just remembered something,” Paula began, as she wrapped her arms around herself and shivered. “...The vision I had as soon as we first arrived in this town. Waiting for us there in Saturn Valley...is the...urp!...the absolute worst foe in all of history...! Ohhh, if I'm being honest...I really don't want to face that thing!”

But in spite of all that, the road to Saturn Valley was very pleasant, at least at first. They walked past the few scattered houses on the outskirts of town and continued down an overgrown, unpaved path until they came to a gate meant to keep cars from trespassing any farther. Beyond this gate was a national forest.

Fir and oak trees, so tall they seemed to touch the clouds, grew in tidy rows on either side of the dusty tire tracks left behind by the park rangers' trucks. Thorny briar bushes and creeping vines grew thickly in the gaps between the trees, and wildflowers bloomed in bright yellows and reds. Little birds were singing, and squirrels ran about on the branches.

“This place is so lovely,” said Paula. From the look on her face, it seemed she had already forgotten all the fears she'd had only a short while ago. “If the weather was only a little nicer, it'd be perfect.”

“I bet, when things are more normal, this is where all the little kids go to have picnics on the weekend,” Ness replied.

“Yeah, it's really nice out here,” Jeff added, with a smile. “And the fact that I'm not feeling tired out from all this walking...that's really, really wonderful.”

“Why's that?” asked Ness. “Is it because a super smart person like you doesn't get much exercise?”

“Yeah, something like that,” Jeff replied. “Or, well, that's how it was. I see you're carrying a bat on your back, but...I've never played baseball at all.”

Jeff said this so frankly that Ness seemed suddenly troubled. “...Why not?” he asked, in a small voice. “Is it because you were so busy studying?”

“...I wouldn't say that, exactly,” said Jeff, and he smiled shyly. “Well...don't worry about it.”

“Hey, look, look! There's a cave!” said Paula, as she pointed up the path ahead of them. “And there's some sort of sign. ...It says, 'Shortcut to Saturn Valley'.”

Another day, another cave. The fallen leaves that had blown inside it were very damp, and the sensation of sinking down into them as they walked through the ominous darkness was very unpleasant. Ness pulled out his mini Maglite and turned it on.

“No one wander off,” he said. “We should stay together.”

Through the intricate, winding twists and turns of the cave the three of them trudged, huddled together tightly. Fed by all the groundwater seeping through, mold and mildew grew on the rough, wet cave walls, and in the unsteady beam of the flashlight it formed into glaring, unsettling shapes, like monstrous faces in the dark. And every once in a while–drip!–cold drops of water would rain down on them from above.

“Hey, is it just my imagination...or does it smell weird in here?” said Paula, as she pinched her nose closed. “...Did one of you...?”

“What are you looking at me, for?” Ness replied. “I didn't do it!”

“What the?! Well it wasn't me!” Jeff cried. “I wouldn't do something so uncouth!”

“But, doesn't it definitely smell like...that?” said Paula. “...And it certainly wasn't me!”

They continued onward, hurling accusations at one another, and the odor became stronger and more distinct. They tried to ignore it, but soon it became unbearable. The three of them fastened bandannas over their noses and mouths, and suddenly they looked like a gang of little bandits.

Gah, this smell is awful! Ness thought, doing his best to hold his breath. If I have to breathe in any more of this, I'm seriously going to throw up...ohh...I need some fresh air–and quick!

After some time, the path ahead of them began to brighten slightly. They'd made it to the other side of the cave–this had to be the exit! They couldn't help but scramble to get out. They became vaguely aware of the sound of running water from somewhere up ahead. The water's edge...a riverbank, maybe... And speaking of rivers, they always rush by so beautifully, don't they? And wherever there's a river, there's always such a pleasant, fresh breeze drifting along beside it... Ness, Paula, and Jeff began to run so fast it's a wonder they didn't trip over their own feet!

But...

“...Huh? What...what is this...?”

They came out into a wide, round, open area in the cave. In the middle of a space roughly the size of a school gymnasium, there was a glossy black thing that looked somewhat like a very tall tree, with a second set of root-like segments sprawled out across the ceiling. Its many outstretched branches were connected by gooey black threads, which created a sort of complex netting. Apparently, that increasingly terrible odor, which was now so strong they felt they could almost reach out and grab it in their hands, was emanating from this strange, tree-like object. Tens of thousands of flies were buzzing about, gathering at the tree, swarming it, weaving their way between the branches, and doing little fly dances.

“What is this, some kind of nest...?” Ness asked, his voice muffled by the bandanna.

“We should probably take a few samples,” Jeff replied, in an equally muffled voice. “I've never heard reports of anything like this, not even in the Young Biology Bulletin. We should analyze it.”

“You're...you're going to touch that stuff...?” Paula gasped, sounding as if she were on the verge of tears. “...Really?”

While Jeff hesitated to answer, the flies all swarmed together, buzzing and humming and looking like silvery-black smoke, then they dispersed again. And was it just their imagination...? The cloud of flies seemed to have formed the shape of a skull and crossbones, and then spell out the word, “Fools!”

“If you really, reeeaaally need to bring some of that back with us,” Paula begged, “then please...use a container with a very sturdy lid, and wrap it in many, many layers of plastic wrap and aluminum foil.”

“...Of course,” said Jeff.

“But more importantly...which of these is the shortcut?” Ness cut in. “Look!”

What the...? All along the wall of this naturally-formed room in the cave, there were...one, two, three... Excluding any that may have been hidden behind that tree-like thing, there were at least five holes leading out!

“Is there a signpost or anything...?”

“I don't see one anywhere!”

“What if...”

“...This was a trap?”

“Well, for starters...which of the three behind us is the one we came out of? Does anyone remember?”

The trio looked at one another with befuddled, bewildered, bemused, and exasperated faces. Ness clicked his tongue and Jeff shook his head slowly. Paula sighed deeply and clapped her hand to her pale forehead.

Letting themselves get lost in a foul-smelling maze like this was terribly careless of them! And what kind of awful person creates such a nasty trap as this in the first place?!

“Well, anyway,” Ness began, putting his hands on the shoulders of the other two in an attempt to cheer them up. “...Just staying put in a place like this won't do us any good. This is all pretty discouraging, but for now, I think we just have to pick a route, and go exploring.”

He was right. There was nothing else they could do. They all nodded in unison and took a few steps, but just then...

Boing, boing, boooing!

Making bizarre-sounding footsteps as it came, a strange and curious little pink creature appeared from behind that black tree.

It had a big, rooound, and very serene face. Its eyes were like two black buttons the size of sesame seeds. It had a stout, splendid nose. Its body was not quite a body at all–instead, it had compact little arms and legs attached right under its face. Sticking out from the top of its head was something like a thin twig, or an antenna. The creature was about half the height of Ness and his friends. In one of its hands, it was holding something like a small bucket. Boing, boing, boooing! Completely defenseless, and trembling severely, it stepped out from the shadow of the tree.

“Wah!”

Ness and his friends cried out in surprise, and the pink thing jumped straight into the air with fright as soon as it noticed their group.

“W-w-w-what is that?” Ness stammered. He lunged forward, holding his bat at the ready. “Is it an enemy?”

cried the pink creature. It fell down with a bit of a bounce, and seemed to be too afraid to get back up. It held its head–or, well, its body, as it didn't have your usual definition of a “head”–in its hands, and it shook from side to side.

“Wait a minute, Ness,” said Jeff, as he clutched Ness's arm. “It doesn't seem to be hostile. It seems friendly and intelligent, doesn't it? And I think it's trying to communicate with us. ...So, pink creature...what are you? Where did you come from?”

Mr. Saturn answered, timidly.

“Ohh, did you say your name is...Mr. Saturn?” said Paula. The other two had no time to stop her. She rushed out from behind Ness, knelt down beside the still somewhat bewildered Mr. Saturn, and took its tiny little hand. “Nice to meet you, my name is Paula,” she said. “There, there now, don't cry. We're sorry for frightening you.”

Mr. Saturn replied, nervously. It bowed quickly.

“Ohhh, what a well-behaved, adorable little thing!”

“...Wait, wait, Paula,” said Jeff, as his shoulders suddenly tensed. “You shouldn't talk like that about a sentient creature, it's rude.”

“Oh no, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean anything bad by it,” said Paula. “But I...but I... Ohh, I just get so weak when I see something so round and small and chubby! Because...because it...it's just so cute, isn't it?!”

Hearing Paula's enthusiastic compliments, Mr. Saturn blushed, with a “Boing”.

“Ahh, that's just soooo cute!”

“...Oh boy,” sighed Ness, as he crossed his arms and shrugged his shoulders. “Come to think of it, Paula is like a big sister to all the little kids at their preschool.”

“...I see. ...Round, small, chubby,” Jeff replied, with a smirk. “I guess Paula's the type with a strong maternal instinct, isn't she?”

...And that was the first time Ness and his friends met the mysterious Mr. Saturn!

Paula and the little Mr. Saturn held hands and skipped through that bothersome cave as if this whole excursion were only a leisurely stroll, until eventually they all found their way out. And right where that long and twisting passage ended, there was a grassy field under a wide-open sky. In holes along cliff walls and on parts of the ground where the grass had been cleared away, many Mr. Saturns had set up homes the likes of which Ness and his friends had never seen. They looked a bit like tents made out of cloth and metal.

It turned out that this Mr. Saturn was not alone–there were many Mr. Saturns, and this was where they lived!

Ness and his friends were welcomed into this strange, peaceful village, where that terrible smell from the cave didn't seem to reach. They rested on a soft, fluffy sofa and enjoyed some delicious tea. The Mr. Saturns were shy and reclusive at first, and seemed to be wondering if the three of them were bad guys. One by one, they would peek out at them from behind their door frames, and then, with a “poof!”, they would run back into hiding. Some of them eventually worked up enough courage to come out and greet them.

“W...wait a minute!” Ness pleaded, looking very confused. “I can't tell the difference between any of you...and on top of that, you're all called Mr. Saturn? You don't have names?”

The Mr. Saturns blinked profusely, and then they crowded their noses together. (In human terms, it seemed they were having a face-to-face meeting.)

said one Mr. Saturn, after a pause.

“I guess they're more like...a colony?” said Jeff, looking thoughtful. “They may have a group consciousness, or they may be very social organisms, with shared ambitions...no distinction between individuals. It might be coded into their DNA...if they have DNA, that is. Each one may be exactly the same as any other.”

“So that means each and every single one of them is just as cute! ❤” said Paula. Her eyes had clouded over, and she seemed to be in a daze. “I want one. I wonder if I can take one...”

“Hey, hey now...”

said a Mr. Saturn who was bringing the three of them some sweets. It spoke with a hint of sadness in its voice.

“Wh...what did you say?”

“A bully? ...Fat? ...Oh, it can't be!” cried Ness. “Does Pokey have something to do with this?”

The Mr. Saturns blinked their eyes excitedly, and then, with a sharp whistle, they called their companions over. Suddenly, Mr. Saturns flocked to them in droves. When they had all assembled, they looked up eagerly at Ness and his friends.

They all spoke at once. And they wore expressions that were as sincere as a Mr. Saturn's expression could possibly be.

“Wait a minute, let me get this straight,” said Ness. “There's some sort of bad guy at some place called 'Grappfruit' Falls, and that bad guy took some of your friends away, is that right?” The Mr. Saturns all nodded yes, yes! at once. “...So you guys have collected some of his favorite food, this 'Fly Honey', and you want to offer it in exchange for your friends, but you don't know if this bad guy will accept it, because he's too scary, and...oh! I know! 'Fly Honey' is what's all over that terrible-smelling black tree-looking thing, isn't it?”

The Mr. Saturns all hopped up and down.

“Fly Honey? Like...the honey...of a fly?” said Jeff, and with a tiny retch, he clapped his hand over his mouth. “And there's someone out there...who wants to eat...that? ...I can't believe it.”

“Belch?!” Paula cried. “Th-th-that...that name perfectly suits the thing I saw in my vision! And if that's him, then yes...he looks like the awful type who would more than gladly eat something like honey made by flies!”

“Belch?” said Ness, as his nose crinkled in disgust. “Well, I guess we have no choice but to take him down!”

“Yeah,” said Jeff. “And we should probably bring some of that stinky stuff with us, for leverage.”

“Do we really have to bring...that...?” Paula whimpered.

The three of them exchanged glances, each one filled with dread.

🎵A muley mule visits the hip hippo's saloon,

🎵Makes that jackass old donkey look like a buffoon,

🎵While the antsy ants, and the flighty flies,

🎵The ticked-off ticks, the fleeting fleas,

🎵Pay no mind to the ladybug's lady-like swoon!

🎵Oh yeah, oh yeah!

🎵Get out, get out!

🎵I'm Belch!

🎵Oh yeah, oh yeah!

🎵Get out, get out!

🎵I'm Belch!

“Oh yeah, oh yeah, barf, barf...horf, horf-hork! Oh, barf, barf, indeed...”

Belch pursed his lips into the shape of a tea kettle's spout again, and he poofed out a yellow-tinted sigh.

“Graugghh, damn it, I'm so out of tune!” he cried. “Gurgle-gorgle...usually I can raise my voice four and a half octaves, easy! What I really need for this husky throat is Fly Honey. Ohh, Fly Honey, Fly Honey...I want it so bad!” Sloshing and oozing, he flopped around and threw a fit right there on the stage. “Master Giygas, where the hell did you go...? Wharf-puke...and what the hell are we trying to make...hork-gurgle...on this low-tech planet, in a crumbling old power plant, using those puke-stupid Saturn idiots, barf-hurl? I'm not cut out to be a field supervisor... But damn it all, he's got some (wharf!) violent streak in him, though...gurgle-gargle...so I guess I gotta do it. At least I only have to check on things every once in a while...”

Slish-slosh, burble burble burble. Reluctantly, Belch put down his microphone and turned off the cocktail lights. Tucking in his unsightly verdigris body, he slithered across the floor.

Right next to Belch's personal karaoke lounge, there was a section of the dam facility that had been remodeled into a factory, and several dozen Mr. Saturns were working in it. Pieces of wood were being brought in and measured, cut to size, sanded, screwed into place, and soldered together. To adjust the temperature of the kiln, they used a valve which could be opened and then closed again. Completed parts were loaded into a wagon for transport. As the parts came down a conveyor belt, there was even a Mr. Saturn in charge of carefully inspecting each and every one. The naturally pink skin of the small and weak little Mr. Saturns had all turned a deep red, and their button eyes blinked profusely as they tried to move as fast as possible (although “fast” may not be the right word for it at all). They were working as hard as they could.

“Hey down there, stop being so lazy, burble-gurgle-horf,” Belch shouted. He extended a part of his body like a whip, and with a crack!, he whacked it down on the floor.

One of the Mr. Saturns jumped with fright at the sound of the whip, slipped on the sweat and steam-soaked floor, and took a tumble, dropping the part it was carrying. it cried, as it panicked and picked the part back up, but...oh no! The tip was a little bent, now!

“'Ping' is all you have to say, you (puke!) little idiot?” Belch roared. “What the hell do you think you're doing?!” Whiiiing! Whaaaaam! Belch's whip started flying all over the place. “Hey, hey now, hork-wharf-borf, back to work, back to work, little Saturn Slaves. Work yourselves to death! Barf-hurl-hahahaha!”

Whiiiiiiiiing! Whaaaaaaam!

cried the Mr. Saturn, again. It was cowering and holding its head in its hands as if to say, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!, and in an attempt to protect their brother-in-arms (or maybe sister-in-arms, I can't really be sure), its companions all gathered around and took the blows from that merciless whip in its place.

“Gurgle-gurg, what is this, a strike?” said Belch. “You slothful, stupid, lazy little pigs! You should be grateful you have the honor of working with the great (horf!) Belch! Work, WORK! Burble-gurgle-urgle......”

As Belch shouted and got himself more and more worked up, an unpleasant mixture of froth and spit rained down in foul-smelling droplets. In the spots where this frothy mixture landed, the floor began to dissolve with a terrible hisssssing sound. The agonized cries of the Mr. Saturns resounded loudly throughout the factory.

But, just then...!

“Stop bullying those innocent creatures!”

...Someone came running out onto the factory floor. Of course, it was our trio– Ness, Paula, and Jeff!

This long-awaited, gallant command sounded a little funny due to the rubber plugs jammed into each of their noses. Then, with timing as perfect as members of a synchronized swimming team, all three of them went wide-eyed at once. As if they'd hit some invisible wall, their enthusiastic dash came to a dead halt even though they were still so far away from Belch himself.

And, well...this was understandable. After all, this was the first time any of them had seen this unthinkably terrible foe with their very own eyes.

With a slow and deliberate movement, the brackish Belch turned to face them. “Hmm?” he grunted. Surrounded by long, thick lashes, those huge, round eyes blinked a few times. Oh, and those massive, limber, upturned lips...! He was so ugly, so deeply disturbing that the three of them cringed and backed away again.

“What the...?” said Belch. “Fledgling humans, hmm? ...Hork-spew.” He smiled in a very condescending way.

“Gorgle-heh, wait a minute,” he said. “That red pelt on your head. That's one of those 'bassball' hat things, isn't it? BUUAARP! So then, you must be Ness! The little brat Master Giygas told me about! So you escaped, then, hmm? That nice-looking zombie, she's failed us again… She'll have to be punished! ...Oh wait, that's right, I already did punish her, didn't I? Man, I always think so far ahead, barf-spew.”

“...It can't be!” Paula muttered in a tearful voice. “This thing is even more hideous than I remember…!”

“It's not just hideous...it's...odious!” said Jeff. His handsome face had gone stiff, and he spoke in a whisper so low it seemed he was muttering only to himself.

“Hork! I like that, I think I'll use it!” cried Belch. He whacked himself on the hip with a soggy shlap!, and then he started snapping out a jazzy rhythm with his 'fingers'. “🎵Both hideous and odious, so they say... Oh, muddy, gory, scummy... Spew-ha-spew-ha! That's good, that's good, now that's a song! The tune is perfect, I'm going with it! BUUURP-BUAARP!”

“...I guess I'm surprised,” said Ness. “Did any of you think this guy would be such a poet?”

“Ness, ugh, don't call it a 'guy',” Paula groaned. “It's a 'thing'!”

“I'm not just a 'poet',” said Belch. “I am the great Karaoke King Belch, whose name is known all throughout the Milky Way! I'm currently taking these hips on tour throughout the entire boundless universe...well, no, it's less about the hips and more about these charming, luscious lips! ...But this will be my glorious debut as a singer-slash-songwriter!” Belch pridefully puffed out his chest–or rather, the middle part of his gooey body swelled out like bread baking in an oven–and he grinned boastfully. “Well how about it, do you want to hear some? Some of my songs?! I'll put on a show for you in my own private arena!”

Ness, Paula, and Jeff all grimaced. With their eyes open wide in horror, they put their hands up and shook their heads desperately, as if to say, “No, no thank you, not at all.”

“Spew-horl, what a shame,” Belch sighed. “But, what can you do. We are sworn enemies, after all.” He pulled himself up to his full height, his sides oozing and jiggling as he moved, and he glared menacingly at the three children. “Master Giygas told me to lock you guys up,” he said. “...Blar-ha-blar-ha-blar-ha! It makes me laugh to think that Master Giygas would be even slightly afraid of some pissy-pants little bastards like you three. BUUARP! ...That's the funniest joke I've heard in quite some time!”

“He's coming...be on your guard!” Jeff whispered sharply. Ness and Paula nodded.

“We should have put an end to his unease right from the start,” Belch growled. “I'll relieve Master Giygas of his fears by sending the lot of you straight to heaven, covered from head to toe in vomit! Hork-hurl-buurp!”

Belch's body began to bubble and wriggle, and those lips stretched into a pointed spout as he hurled some sort of yellow liquid at them!

“Barrier!” cried Paula, and she spread her arms out wide! Suddenly, a crystalline wall appeared in mid-air, and that horrible muck splattered across it with a heavy thwack!

“...It's just as I predicted,” said Jeff. He was holding a small, card-like device in his hand, which had a blinking LCD screen. This device was a collaboration between the young scientific genius Jeff and the mysterious Mr. Saturns–The Super Monster Checker! “This thing's susceptible to cold temperatures! And to hypnosis! And it has a weakness for Fly Honey, above all else!”

“Alright, then,” said Ness. “Let's go! Hraaahh!” He pulled a black ball out from somewhere or other, tossed it up high, and then hit it with his bat as hard as he could.

A line drive shot!

The ball sliced through the air and slammed straight into Belch! It was a direct hit to his face, and with a splooooiiiiit!, dark, sticky liquid spread all over him!

“Aahrrgghh-burble-hork ☠!” Belch's huge eyes rolled wildly as he gave a short grunt, and then gulping sounds came from somewhere deep in his throat.

“...Fl...Fly Honey?!” he cried. Slurp, slurp, sleurp... He licked at it cautiously, then he streeeeetched out his tongue to hastily lap up some more, jiggling with glee. “It's Fly Honey!” he repeated, joyfully. “Fly, Fly, Fly Honey! It's really, truly, honey-honey, Fly Honey, isn't it?!”

His large eyes sparkled with rapturous delight, and his body flashed with red, green, and yellow lights like a pinball machine! They spelled out things like, “LUCKY!” and “I GOT IT!”, and there was the loudly resounding CLINK-CLINK-CLINK-CLINK-CLINK! sound of coins being ejected from who knows where. Belch's body oozed lazily out over the ground like an uncooked crepe, and the very edges of this sticky puddle lightly fluttered and flapped.

“🎵I'm happy, oh, so happy, hic! Now this is some high-quality Fly Honey! Wharf!”

Wriggling, waggling tentacles sprouted from random spots on his body, and although we'll never know just where they got these things from, they were holding utensils, a bowl, and a little plate, and they were clink-clicky-clink!ing them together in a happy little dance. He was acting like your average giddy drunkard.

“Next up...some of this!” cried Ness. This time, he pulled out a pure-white ball of something that was giving off little puffs of steam. (That's right, it was dry ice–but all you good little children out there know better than to touch that stuff with your bare hands, don't you?) He tossed it up into the air, then whacked it with the bat! And just as he did...

“PSI Freeeeeze!”

“Elemental Conversion Supercooling Gun, Absolute Zeroooo!”

...Paula and Jeff threw in some attacks of their own!

Sheeeen! That disgusting Belch couldn't handle all this! He was freezing up, still wearing an expression of supreme, pure bliss, right in the middle of that raucous celebration in honor of finally receiving his beloved Fly Honey. His eyeballs, his mouth, and every inch of those skinny tentacles which were still in the midst of their plate-clinking dance...in less than an instant, and with a cold tinkling sound, his entire body was frozen solid. And then, after a breathless silence, crick...crack......CRACKLE!, he shattered into tiny pieces and was completely destroyed.

“...We did it!” cried Ness, as he threw his fist triumphantly into the air.

“Thank goodness we came through, somehow,” Jeff replied, and he took a strong-smelling disinfectant spray out of his backpack and sprayed it absolutely everywhere.

“I kind of feel sorry for it, somehow,” sighed Paula, as she cautiously removed her nose plugs. “Sure, it looked terrible, and it smelled terrible, and its singing was terrible, but, it seemed so...naive.”

One by one, the Mr. Saturns who had been forced into heavy labor abandoned their posts and ran over to the trio. It seemed that one of them had been infected by Belch's habit of coming up with awful rhymes...but they were all smiling and very happy. As for the Mr. Saturns who were injured, or who were too exhausted to move, Ness carried them in his arms or on his back and gathered them all together.

“...Oh, that's right,” Paula muttered to herself, as she tried to help the injured Mr. Saturns with PSI Healing. “That thing was being so cruel to all these adorable Mr. Saturns. I can't have any sympathy for someone like that! It got what it deserved, hmph!”

“Plus, it seems like it was controlling all those zombies, too,” added Jeff. “I'd hate to think how things would have turned out if we didn't destroy it.”

“Oh, that too,” said Paula.

“...Pokey,” Ness muttered softly, as he shook his head. “It seems like he was involved with all this stuff here, too. He keeps getting worse...I wonder where he is now, and what he's doing...”

“Mr. Saturns, is everyone accounted for?” asked Jeff. “Alright then, let's get out of here!” He pulled out something that looked like lumps of clay. “These are plastic explosives. This enemy base should be destroyed. Mr. Saturns...those of you who can move, please help me out!”

They split off into groups and planted the explosives all throughout the factory. Jeff attached the fuses, gathered all the wires together, and flipped the switch on a timed detonator. “Alright, everyone–run!”

Through the complex interior of the dam–onward and upward!–the huge flock of Mr. Saturns ran. By nature, they were not built to hurry. One tripped over its own feet in its panic. One did a somersault, rolled away, and had to be found again. There was even one who had become too overwhelmed and suddenly stopped to meditate, and it took a lot of sincere encouragement from the group in order for it to start running again. At a set of stairs, they found that the Mr. Saturns' arms and legs were too short to reach up to each step, so Ness and Jeff positioned themselves at opposite ends of the staircase and the one at the bottom tossed each Mr. Saturn up to the one at the top.

Meanwhile, back in the factory area, the digits on the detonator were counting down, and fast. Nine, eight, seven...

And just as their group exited through Grapefruit Falls...

BAAANG! BANG, BANG, BOOOOOOOM!

...There came the explosion! The instant that timer hit zero, the group was engulfed in shock waves and blasts of hot wind as the plastic explosives went off one by one! Rumble-rumble-rumble-rumble... Before long, the whole area shook as if there had been an earthquake, and there was a deafening, resounding roar as the rocks and concrete that had formed the foundation of the falls simply crumbled away and fell. A dense mist rose as the sudden surge of water blasted through the boulders on the river's edge and took down entire trees. All at once, the river overflowed its banks as the mud and muck that had accumulated through the years and all the remains of the machinery from the hydroelectric power plant were gradually swept away.

As they looked up above, a rift appeared in those black, low-hanging clouds covering the sky, and there was a small flash of lightning. Suddenly the sky began to brighten, and just as if someone high up in the heavens had run through them with a vacuum cleaner, each and every dark cloud vanished.

The sky was blue again! It was a bright, sunny day. That fresh, citrusy breeze was blowing. A rainbow had appeared right beside the falls, which were now significantly smaller and a great deal cuter.

The three of them gasped in awe.

“It's just as I thought,” said Jeff. “There was a weather manipulation device somewhere in that factory.” He used his hand to shield his eyes from the bright sun. “If we'd had the time, I would have liked to find out more about such a device, and properly study how it worked.”

“With the weather as nice as this again, I'm sure any monsters that were still out wandering in Threed will go back into hiding!” said Paula, smiling joyfully.

Unfortunately, that one Mr. Saturn still hadn't quite kicked that terrible rhyming habit.

“Alright!” cried Ness. He had been quiet and pensive for quite some time, but it seemed he'd finally regained his spirits. “Now that that's settled...well, let's go!”

As thanks for escorting so many of their friends home safely, the Mr. Saturns gave them various heart-felt gifts–a strange medicine that would bring forth a burst of courage even in times when things seemed hopeless, a machine that could siphon energy out of their enemies, a hyper-survival straw that could purify incredibly muddy or even poisoned water, and so on and so on. Despite how they may have appeared, the Mr. Saturns had a remarkable level of scientific knowledge!

They gave Jeff, who was already quite impressed, a wristwatch with a built-in device that could detect the presence of aliens. For Paula, they tied up her hair in a lovely ribbon that had the ability to increase her protective powers.

And as for Ness...

They told him that deep in Saturn Valley, in a place called Milky Well, there was a new power spot–one of Ness's so-called “Sanctuaries”. So of course, he headed there right away. And there, sucking up the power spot's energy, he found a monster called the Trillionage Sprout. After this creature was defeated, Ness thought he heard his mother's voice from somewhere far away. “...Be a thoughtful, strong boy,” his mother prayed.

And with that, Ness was another step closer to realizing his full potential!

Chapter 6 – HAMBURGERS!

A bright and energetic young boy wearing a red baseball cap and resting a bat on his shoulder, a charming and adorable young girl with her curly, golden hair tied up neatly in a ribbon, and a slender, delicate young genius in glasses...

This group of three close friends smiled brightly as they ambled along. They marched over the yellow sand of the desert, leaving small footprints behind them. The intense, sizzling mid-summer sun blazed down on them from above, and dull, monotonous scenery stretched far into the distance in each and every direction. But these three didn't seem to mind any of that.

The boy with the glasses looked first at his wristwatch and then at the sun, and he chose a direction. The boy in the cap, who had lost a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors, was red in the face as he carried everyone's belongings. In her pretty voice, the girl with the ribbon was singing a funny song she had learned from who knows where, and they were all practically rolling with laughter.

When one of them got sand in their shoes, another offered a shoulder to lean on, and the third opened a can of juice with a nice psssht! sound. They all passed the can around and drank from it.

Before too long, the boy in the red cap stopped, and he spoke very quickly. Everyone put down what they were carrying. The boy in the glasses took out something that looked like a short pen. He stretched it out with a snap!, and it became a shining silver parasol. Setting herself down in the improvised shade, the girl with the ribbon spread out a picnic blanket and handed out cold, wet towels. With practically a little ta-dah!, the boy in the red hat pulled a couple of tightly wrapped hamburgers out of his backpack. The boy with the glasses attached some sort of cord to the silver parasol, then nimbly assembled a box-like object out of pleated foil that was shiny on one side. Apparently the parasol was also a solar cell, and the foil box was an instant oven. Ding! Now the burgers were piping hot. They all sat side-by-side to have their lunch.

The boy with the red cap took a big bite out of his burger. The boy with the glasses caaarefully opened his, picked off the sliced onions, and tried to toss them aside, but the girl with the ribbon caught him in the act, and with a little whack!, she slapped his hand. The boy in the cap opened his (totally cavity-free!) mouth wide as he laughed, with a hearty GA-HAHAHAHA!

Lounging lazily in the shadow of a cactus, there was a type of flightless bird called a Crested Booka, and a Desert Wolf with tired eyes who was watching over the trio with very apparent jealousy.

Damn them... They look like they're having such a fun, happy little outing...!

The wolf was quite a distance from them–all the way on the other side of the desert. Yet it ground its teeth and stared at them with such a lonesome gaze.

Of course, the trio had no idea they were being watched by this certain someone, somewhere out there, and so they went right on talking, laughing with one another, and stuffing their faces full of delicious food.

Damn you all... You better watch out. One of these days...one of these days, I'll tear you to shreds!

“You just remember that, Ness!”

Pokey was startled by the sound of his own shout.

He blinked his small, cold, blue eyes.

Pastel-striped wallpaper. A terribly high-class, fancy-looking floral carpet. Huge windows with half-opened, two-tone blinds, and ceiling-mounted anti-glare lighting. A solid oak writing desk almost seven feet wide.

Pokey was sprawled out across a huge salmon pink leather sofa. Just a few inches from his nose was a table with a thick glass top and marble legs. Like a photo on the introduction page of a magazine about classy interior design, everything was brand new and modern casual. This was a very ritzy-looking office.

There in that excessively large room, where fifty people could easily have danced a waltz if they'd had a mind to, Pokey found himself completely alone. It was so quiet that he thought he heard ringing in his ears. He thrust his fingers into them to clear them out, but apparently that sound was just the buzz of the air conditioner. The atmosphere was chilly and dry, and carried a vague scent of greenery.

Clicking his tongue and scratching at reddened parts of his chubby thighs where sweat had gathered between his skin and the leather of the couch, Pokey got up, opened a cabinet near the wall, and turned on the audio equipment. He heard an orchestral composition–something by Vivaldi, maybe. It had a wonderful ambiance. He hurriedly flipped through the stations. Country western, sweet love songs, Balinese gamelan, hymns sung by children with clear, high-pitched voices, stand-up comedy...hard rock with a heavy beat.

GO TO HELL

I WANNA GO TO

GO TO HELL

Da-da, dan-da-da, dan-da-da, dan-da-da-dan

Da-da, dan-da-da, dan-da-da, dan-da-da-dan...

“Someone else on the road to hell, hmm...?” A twisted chuckle escaped Pokey, and his flabby, drooping cheeks quivered. He looked something like a pinkish bulldog. His t-shirt sleeves were pulled so taut around the bulging flesh of his arms that it seemed as though they would tear at any moment. His shorts were just about popping at the seams, too. It appeared as though Pokey had gotten even fatter.

He took a bright red can of cola out of the refrigerator in the cabinet and opened it with a psssht! by crushing it in his hand. He didn't care at all about the sticky, brown droplets that trickled all over that beautiful floor. He staggered over to the window and opened the blinds.

Apparently this room was on the top floor of a considerably tall building in a city. Down below, there were countless other buildings and busy streets. He could see cars and pedestrians flowing through the city like pumping blood vessels viewed through a microscope.

His eyelids twitched spasmodically. His strangely protruding, bloodshot eyes looked down at the streets, but also seemed to focus on nothing at all. Pokey turned the soda can upside down as he gulped it, and then he suddenly began to choke. Brown liquid spilled from the corners of his mouth. Cough, cough, hack–... He grabbed his knees and clutched at his chest. He dragged his fingernails across the wall, making a very unpleasant sound. He closed his eyes, furrowed his brows, and did his best to endure his discomfort, but...twitch!...his whole body went into rhythmic shocks, and he fell with a thud. He propped himself up on the floor with his shaky arms, and made a noise that sounded like a howl. The half-crushed cola can rolled away unsteadily, leaving fizzy puddles behind as it went. Guaah...gaaaah......hgguaaahh! He threw up the cola he'd tried to drink, but the convulsions didn't stop. His mouth hung open in apparent agony, and thick streams of drool trickled out of it. Thu-thump...thu-thump... The arteries in his neck visibly swelled and shrank. Sweat, tears, and mucus streamed down his face.

“Damn it... What's going on...?” Pokey growled in a low voice, as he picked himself back up during a break in his spasms. “What the hell is happening to me...to my body...? ...Uuugh, damn it...damn it...!”

Between a beautiful painting of a rural landscape, and one of a gallant general riding a horse that was rearing up on its hind legs, there was a small, eerie, golden figure being displayed on its own pedestal. Now where have we seen this object before...? ...Ah yes, it was that statue known as the Mani Mani, which those Blue Blue people had been worshiping!

Its glossy, gleaming skin reflected a distorted image of Pokey, who continued to moan as the golden statue stood by silently...motionlessly...

Now then, back to Ness's group.

As the three of them crossed over the desert, they found a small, shabby hut. Nearby, there was a huge excavator machine half-buried in the yellow sand.

“We're out here digging for gold ore,” said an Asian man in a safety helmet who introduced himself as Gerardo Montague. He sat cross-legged in his work boots on a tatami mat and poured out some barley tea. He seemed to be the type who liked to chat. “We found some weird old document that says it should be around here somewhere! Hey, why aren't you guys taking the highway, anyway? Oh? A huge herd of buffalo are crossing it, and they're causing huge traffic delays, huh? Hahahaha, well, that's quite unfortunate. When that happens, it's usually two full days before things start moving again. You did the right thing, trying to go the rest of the way on foot. ...If you have the energy for it, that is. You say you're trying to get to Fourside? Ah, well you were going in the right direction. If you head east from here and keep walking for about a day, eventually you'll see Golden Bridge. Fourside is the big city just across that bridge.”

“Thank goodness, Ness!” said Paula. Gerardo, who was at that moment trying to drink tea straight out of the kettle's spout, began to cough and sputter.

“Did you say 'Ness'?” he asked. “...Do you happen to have any connection to that Ness Burger place?”

“Yeah,” Ness replied with a nod, looking somewhat bashful. “My father's the one who started Ness Burger.”

“...Is that so?” said Gerardo, a bit hesitantly. He smoothed out a wrinkle in his work gear at his knee, then folded it back over again. It seemed as if he had something he really wanted to say.

“...Do you have some grievance against Ness Burger?” asked Jeff, trying to find the most polite way to question him.

“...No,” Gerardo replied. “...Yes. ...Well–”

“Please tell us, we won't be offended or anything,” said Paula, as she leaned in earnestly.

“Well, I'll tell you,” Gerardo began, “but...well, lately, it just hasn't been...quite right.”

“Not right? ...What do you mean by that, exactly?” asked Ness. “Like, the taste isn't as good?”

“Uh-huh...well, no, I wouldn't say that, exactly,” Gerardo replied. He looked up at Ness, who appeared to be in a state of mild shock, gave a little sigh, and then began to speak his mind.

“Every now and then, we go over to Fourside to do some shopping,” he said. “Since we all love them so much, we usually buy a whole bunch of Ness Burgers, too. But...there's something strange about it all. The other day, we bought some burgers and brought them back with us as usual. The guys ate one or two each, but...they just didn't feel satisfied. They ate three, then four, but it still wasn't enough. They ate up ten, maybe twenty of them a piece, and still, their stomachs didn't feel full! That's a really bizarre thing, isn't it? But they still wanted to eat even more, and they began to fight over the few burgers that were left. They got very aggressive, and even started stealing from one another using brute force. And then, unable to control themselves, they went off to buy more. ...They all just up and left, and never came back. That's why...I'm all alone, here.”

The three of them exchanged glances. Ness had a frightened look on his face.

“But...were you alright, Gerardo?” he asked.

“...Yeah, I guess so,” Gerardo replied. “My stomach had been hurting, so I didn't have much of an appetite at that time. I asked them to save some aside for me, thinking I might eat them later. ...But those guys had all become such ravenous fiends! Their faces were barely recognizable as they rushed in and devoured every last burger in the blink of an eye. In the end, I went without dinner that night.”

“That seems very fishy,” said Jeff. His eyes narrowed behind those glasses. “Do you think...someone may have drugged them? Maybe someone has compounded a substance that can affect a person's appetite...”

“...Eating twenty burgers and not feeling full?” Paula began. “I don't care how intense a workout routine a person has, that's got to be a calorie overload!” She shook her head. “You'd become so bloated, and that is way too much cholesterol and grease at once! You'd get so fat it would be an immediate danger to your health! And then, to try to ease all your stress, you'd just eat some more... That's binge-eating at its worst!”

“The people of Fourside are in trouble,” said Ness, and he got to his feet. “We have to help them! ...Oh, but of all places, why did it have to be Ness Burger?”

“Come to think of it,” said Gerardo, as he stroked his chin, “the burger wrappers looked a little different this time. It seemed to be a new line, or something. It had something like 'Bio-Appeal–Bio-Ness Burger!' printed on it, I think...”

“Bio-Ness Burger?!” The three of them had already made it halfway to the exit, but they turned back around, looking stunned.

“You should probably be wary of the coffee, too,” Gerardo added. “Have you seen all the publicity it's gotten on TV and over the radio recently?” The three of them shook their heads, as if to say, no we haven't! They hadn't watched any TV or listened to the radio at all lately. “Apparently even most coffee connoisseurs out there don't know about it yet, but they're using some special kind of bean, and have come up with something they call Bio-Ness Coffee, which is supposed to be ten times more delicious than the usual stuff...for folks who can tell the difference.”

“...That's so eerie,” Paula whispered, wrapping her arms tightly around herself. “I can only sense greedy and evil intentions here...I have a feeling something very nasty is going on in Fourside!”

Ness and Jeff nodded silently in agreement.

“Come on in, the service here is free!”

“Please, try some of our new products!”

At an intersection surrounded by skyscrapers, right in the heart of the hustle and bustle of pedestrians and cars, there was a banner that read, “BIO-NESS BURGER & BIO-NESS COFFEE!” When the trailer of a huge event truck popped open, a flashy billboard and makeshift stage appeared almost instantly.

“Alright, don't push, don't shove. You, and...you, please come on in!”

“In this corner here, you'll get to try the Bio-Ness Burger, and also the brand-new Bio-Ness Coffee you've probably heard so much about lately!”

A line of girls in high-cut leotards suddenly appeared. They wore very forced and unnatural smiles on their faces as they handed out trays with small burgers and paper cups on them.

All of this excitement began holding up the flow of people walking through the intersection. People who had been hurrying along suddenly stopped short, and people who had already passed by turned around and rushed back. The trays were suddenly swarmed by so many hands...hands...hands! And those samples were greedily gobbled up by so many mouths...mouths...mouths! Taking advantage of being stopped at the intersection's red light, some drivers even flew out of their cars and ran over with such urgency that they almost tripped over their own feet. When one person ran over, five more followed. When the light changed back to green, and several cars were left behind with no one to move them, a terrible traffic jam began. BEEP-BEEP! HOOONK! Horns blared. PRRREEEEEEEEET! A policeman climbed up onto a platform and blew his whistle sharply, but there seemed to be no end to the stream of cars that drove wildly past in their impatience. In all the chaos caused by the abandoned cars left in the intersection, the light changed again, and frustrated drivers bore down aggressively. BE-BE-BEEEEP! BEEPITTY-BEEP-BEEEEP! Side-view mirrors scraped loudly against one another. As a motorcycle tried to slip through, it was struck from behind and its rider flew through the air. A silver sedan was slammed by another car and was pushed up onto the sidewalk. A small roadster was squashed flat between two huge trucks. PRRREE-PRREEEEET! PRREE-PRRRREEEET! In the end, even the policeman threw away his whistle and dove into the frenzied crowd.

There was pushing, shoving, and punching. Items and money were being stolen from handbags. Soft sneakers were being stomped by sharp high heels. An old man fell to the ground as his barking dog pulled at its leash. A small, lost child screamed “Mama, mamaaa!” in a shrill voice, but absolutely no one seemed to care.

“Hey now, only one sample per customer!”

“If you're still hungry, please head into the restaurant to buy yourself some more!”

“Oh, wait, stay in your lines, please! Stay in the—yaaaaahh!”

In all the commotion, the women in high-cut leotards were swallowed up by the crowd. When a group of men in white chef's hats came around pushing a wagon loaded with a fresh supply of burgers and coffee, there was another sudden flood of hands, hands, hands! And so many mouths, mouths, mouths! were screaming, “Over here, pass some over here!” But even the folks who finally managed to get their free samples had no time to savor them, as greedy hands crowded in from all around in an attempt to snatch whatever they could reach. They had to scarf down their burgers and coffee as fast as they could. It was absolute chaos!

“That's it, that's all we have! There's no more, so...hey! Don't touch me!”

“If you'd like to purchase more, please, head into the restaurant, it's that way–over there!”

The gathered mob cried out in hoarse voices as they suddenly looked toward the restaurant. Then they all began moving at once. The crowd became a living, undulating mass, slowly turning itself around like a bulky battleship on the sea. This mass chose its new destination and morphed into a swelling, elongated form which gradually began to drift toward its target. It crossed through the intersection, bulging out over the roadway.

Onward, onward they marched...toward the shop promising to provide that wonderful and exclusive Bio-Ness Burger!

“Oh-ho-ho-ho, go on in, go on in!”

A man in a business suit, a very rich man by all appearances, chuckled to himself as he peered down through a telescope. He was twisting and twirling the ends of his mustache with his freshly manicured fingers. “Go on in, the whole lot of you, one after another,” the man continued. “Like little ants, drawn to sugar. ...Heh-heh-heh, it's not easy to prepare food for such a large and boisterous crowd! There's not even any time for breaks!”

“Yesterday, we sold three-hundred-seventy-two-thousand-eight-hundred units at three dollars and ninety cents each!” Behind a desk, a thin, seedy-looking, middle-aged man, wearing an expression that made him look somewhat like a weasel, gleefully finished punching away at a calculator. “Profits have grown sixty-three percent since last week!” the weaselly man went on. “So far, our restaurant to the south is the one making the highest profit. The concession stand in the rooftop amusement park above my Monotoli Department Store is showing strong numbers, as well...and thanks to that, all the rest of the shops throughout the whole department store are doing well, too! ...We should probably send more supplies and manpower over there.”

“Here, have a look, Monotoli,” the man at the telescope beckoned. “It's our greatest accomplishment yet–we've already served over a thousand customers, easy!”

“...Well, well!” said the weaselly man. Putting down his paperwork, picking up his reading glasses, and strutting over to the window with his backside jutting out in a somewhat pompous gait, this man with the weasel-like face–Geldegarde Monotoli–looked down at the wriggling mass of people in the street below and nodded, seeming very content. With an enchanted smile, he leaned toward the other man, who was still peering down into the telescope, and–MWUUAAAH!–he planted an over-excited kiss right on his cheek. “Oh, I really appreciate all you've done, Mister Minch!” Monotoli cried. “In fact, I couldn't possibly thank you enough!”

“Apparently not,” Aloysius Minch replied with a wry smile, as he used a silk handkerchief to wipe off his now very reddened cheek. “But, all of this is thanks to my son. That boy is the one who came up with the new burger recipe, after all.”

“Ah, yes, young Pokey!” Monotoli cried. He clasped his hands together as if in fervent prayer, and he trembled from head to toe. “Your son is a genius both of the culinary arts and of marketing. He is the savior of my Monotoli Foundation...an archangel, sent by the very gods of prosperous business themselves!”

“Well, if you really...believe that,” a ragged voice began. Bursting through the door with a loud bang, Pokey suddenly entered the room. Excessive amounts of flesh sagged from beneath his shorts and from the sleeves of his t-shirt. With each sluggish step, every part of him chafed and grew inflamed, and he seemed to be in a great deal of pain. His small eyes and nose were buried behind his swollen cheeks, and he wore a terribly sullen expression. “...Then...call for...an outstanding...doctor.” He clutched at his chest, his heart in apparent distress. He was breathing heavily, and couldn't seem to say more than a few words at once. “Can...one of you...get me...some help? ...I don't...feel...so good...”

“Oh, this can't be!” cried Monotoli, as he flew to Pokey's side. “Oh, come here, over here, please sit down, we'll take care of this, right away. ...Secretary! We need a doctor–call the Fourside hospital and have them send a team of their best doctors right away!”

“Are you alright, Pokey?” asked Aloysius. His mustache twitched at the sight of his son, who had collapsed exhaustedly into a chair.

Even in the eyes of his father, the amount of weight Pokey had gained was disturbing. His cheeks, which were once round and soft like freshly baked bread, now hung down in an unsightly way. Several folds of flesh hung from his chin down to his chest, and it was hard to make out his neck. His arms and legs were so swollen it looked as if his wrists and ankles had been constricted by rubber bands. His excess flab took up the entire easy chair, where an average person would have had plenty of room to spread themselves out.

“Oh...papa,” said Pokey, as he smiled faintly. “You don't...need to...worry... I'm just...a little...nauseous... Ohh...I just need...to eat...something...a little...sour...”

“It's almost as if you're expecting a baby,” Aloysius replied. He furrowed his brows, pulled a pipe out of his pocket, and began to fill it with tobacco. “If you were a girl, you'd have frightening possibilities you'd have to consider. When Lardna was pregnant with you, she became terribly overweight. And she ate half a dozen oranges every day!”

“Oranges!” Monotoli screamed, into his desktop telephone. “...And kiwis, and lemons, and raspberries! Bring me a whole heap of very sour fruits, right away!”

“...Mister...Mono...toli...?” Pokey gasped, between breaths.

“Yes, yes, what is it, my boy?” Monotoli replied, as he jumped up immediately and approached him, rubbing his hands together. He knelt respectfully at Pokey's feet.

“That lot...next to the...Monotoli building,” Pokey began. “It's empty, but...did you...make sure...no one...can get in...anyway?”

“Yes, of course!” said Monotoli, as he nodded confidently. “Don't you worry. We built a sixteen foot wall around it, covered that in high-voltage barbed wire, and sealed off the only entrance with a metal plate fortified by concrete! I've also hired a team of twenty-four former wrestlers and karate champions as security guards, and using a three-shift system they carefully monitor the grounds twenty-four hours a day!”

“I see... That's...good,” said Pokey. He smiled very faintly, then closed his eyes miserably.

“But, uhm...young man?” Monotoli began, hesitantly. “I wonder if I may ask...just one thing? Why is that boring, empty plot of land so...important to you?”

Pokey opened his eyes only slightly, and he shot a glare at Monotoli. He said nothing.

“I-it's alright...uh...if you don't want to discuss it any further,” Monotoli stuttered. “That's fine, it's just that–”

“It's because of...Ness,” Pokey muttered. He looked away from Monotoli, and stared off into nothing. “It's because he's...coming...”

“It's...because of...Ness?” Monotoli repeated.

“Yes,” said Pokey. “No matter what...we can't...let him...anywhere near there.” He gripped the armrests of the chair tightly. His fingers dug into the plush leather like fat, round little caterpillars, making a terribly unpleasant sound. Even the metal supports within the armrest warped under his grip like taffy.

“He can't...come here,” Pokey growled. His eyes were open wide, and he trembled strangely. “I will kill him. ...Don't...come...any closer...to me...Ness...!”

Stunned, Aloysius froze before he could even light the pipe he held in his mouth. Unable to stand any more of this, he stepped out into the hallway.

At just that moment, the elevator door at the end of the hall slid open. Doctors in white coats and a nurse had arrived, with a cart filled to the brim with fruit. They were stopped near the reception desk, as security guards with sour looks on their faces hastily checked everyone out.

Aloysius lowered himself into a chair along the wall, and with trembling fingers, he struck a match. “I'm rich,” he muttered. “...And I'm only going to become richer. ...I'm going to be one of the richest men in the whole world.” He finally lit his pipe. With his head held low, he could hear the group of doctors with their cart full of fruit rushing through the hallway beside him in a panic. He exhaled a huge cloud of smoke and gripped his trembling knee. “Enormous wealth...an unbelievable amount of money... Money that begets more money...money that grows more money... Oh, of course, if you have the money, then there's nothing you can't do! I just need more...more money...!” The pipe clattered against his chattering teeth. His stare was vacant and unfocused. He wrapped his arms around himself as though he couldn't stand the cold, but Aloysius' face was drenched with sweat.

After crossing the Golden Bridge and entering Fourside, Ness's group of three checked into a room in a small hotel to discuss their plan of action. They were avoiding burgers (and even if they had wanted to buy any, they couldn't, because the lines were so long!), so they ordered a pizza for delivery. They figured they'd have tons of free time while they waited, but all three were shocked by how quickly the pizza arrived. On top of that, the pizza box happened to have an informative guide to Fourside printed right on it.

“Oh, so that really big, fancy-looking skyscraper is the Monotoli Building... Whoa, and there's a dinosaur museum! We should go there!”

“And there's the Topolla Theater, too!”

“We should probably take care of that whole burger problem first,” Paula pointed out bluntly, sounding very much like an older sister. “We should try to investigate one of the shops' kitchens, if we can. I'm sure they're hiding something.”

“We're just gonna sneak in?”

“...But these shops are open all night, I think. And with their customers in that kind of frenzy, I don't think they'll let up at all, even in the middle of the night!”

“The customers probably don't know what's going on. I bet even the people working there are completely unaware.”

“Damn it...we can't let innocent people get dragged into all this...!”

“Hey wait,” said Paula. “Look, there's a department store!” She pointed to a spot on the map, and she looked from Ness to Jeff. “It's called the Monotoli Department Store. The same person must also own that fancy building. I bet a businessman successful enough to have his name on so many buildings wouldn't want to miss out on something as popular as this Bio-Ness Burger. I'm sure there's a burger shop in this department store. ...And department stores always close at night!”

“That's it!”

“Yeah!”

It was almost dusk. The three of them headed to the Monotoli Department store at once.

The first floor had an especially high ceiling and was mostly filled with women's goods. Accessories, umbrellas, handkerchiefs, stockings, handbags...lovely and stylish items, all displayed appealingly. Out of the corner of her eye, Paula spotted all kinds of tags saying things like “World-Class Item!” and “SPECIAL SALE–Fifty Percent Off!”, and without quite meaning to, she began to fall behind. ...Until suddenly she gazed straight into the eyes of a smiling mannequin in the cosmetics testing corner. It looked like something right out of a live stage drama, with intense, gaudy makeup painted, coated, and smeared all over its face...and its eyes seemed to flash, like an animal hunting its prey! Not only that, but it also seemed to be beckoning to her with its two-inch-long, hot pink nails! Come here, over here... Paula shuddered and came to her senses. Then, flustered, she ran to catch up with Ness and Jeff.

They climbed to the second, then the third floor. Designer brands, juniors, menswear. Underwear, sleepwear, furs, formalwear. Fourth floor–sports equipment, hobby items. Fifth floor–kitchen and interior. The sixth floor was books, CDs, and stationery. The seventh floor, clocks, computers, appliances. The eighth floor had beauty salons and an exhibition hall. And the ninth floor had a wide open food court.

It was the largest department store they had ever seen. There were escalators running here and there. The three of them each took detours in turn to see things that caught their interest, or they stopped short to look at something or other, until eventually they lost track of which way was which, where they had come from, and where they were going. Despite the large number of people bustling about, the sales floors were so spacious that it never felt crowded or uncomfortable. However...

As they climbed the final set of stairs and came out onto the rooftop...

“Whoa, what's with all these people?”

“What a huge crowd!”

“Look over there. It's Bio-Ness Burger!”

There was an awning with red, white, and blue stripes offering shade from the sun. Dozens of flags sporting the bright red Bio-Ness Burger logo were fluttering in the wind. It seemed very obvious that the large crowd was gathering there.

This perfectly flat, excessively wide roof had been made into a decent amusement park for children. There was a pool, a roller coaster, go-karts, and a merry-go-round with white horse carts. Little rides for toddlers that would jostle them around gently if you inserted fifteen cents. A Viking ship and spinning swings. A game corner, a florist, a pet shop with cats and dogs and tropical fish...all sorts of exciting things. And of course, there was an especially tall Ferris wheel!

Just beside a special event stage, there were about a hundred plastic picnic tables standing in rows. All around them, there were plenty of stands selling cheap, simple foods like tacos, shaved ice, frankfurters, fish & chips, and freshly squeezed juices, but they were all completely desolate. The employees working these stands looked quite sullen as they stood there with their arms crossed, staring vacantly.

On the other hand, there was one stand in particular that was doing extremely well–that ominous Bio-Ness Burger stand. “Yes, twenty Bio-Ness Burgers here!” “Ten double cheese Bio-Ness Burgers, and five large Bio-Ness Coffees! Coming right up!” The stand's ten employees spoke in loud, hoarse voices as they hurried to and fro. They were so busy it was dizzying. “Hey, you–I was next, don't cut the line!” “That other line keeps moving, this isn't fair!” “Aah, hurry up, I can't take this anymore!” The customers were creating an uproar of piercing voices, too. There were customers who stomped their feet in frustration, and customers who tried switching lines. There was a child who could just barely reach the counter, and an old woman who appeared to have gotten in line just to talk and who would explain things in a loud voice to anyone nearby, even when they hadn't asked. A lady who was carrying a very heavy-looking bag of burgers in each hand suddenly became too afraid of the jealous stares from the people all around her, and she dashed off in a panic.

Ness and his friends looked over at the picnic tables, and each and every one of them was filled with people opening up the bright red wrappers of their Bio-Ness Burgers and chomping down on them in a daze. One person had a mountainous pile of burgers beside them and was tossing them into their mouth one by one. Another held a burger in each hand and seemed to have something caught in their throat as their eyes darted about wildly. Yet another was rubbing their painfully swollen belly while sluggishly taking more bites of their burger. And there were others who had finally eaten themselves into exhaustion, rolled over onto their backs, and were groaning things like, “Please, someone, call me an ambulance!” There were people all around them, but not one of them looked up at Ness's group. They were all too desperately focused on eating!

“Hang in there, we'll get you some stomach medicine, okay?” said Ness. He had been trying to help one of the people who had collapsed on the ground to sit up, when suddenly, he cried out in surprise. “Oh! You're–”

“Oh! It's one of the Runaways!” cried Paula, as she suddenly recognized him, too.

They looked again, and noticed that everyone at that table was in a black suit and a black necktie. They were all wearing black hats, too. Looking as ever like professional back-alley hitmen, it was the five cheerful jazzmen of the Runaway Five!

One by one, they gulped down the digestive capsules Jeff offered them from a first aid kit. As their bloated bellies gurgled, they looked up at Ness and Paula from beneath their black sunglasses, which had slipped down their sweat-covered noses.

“Well, well, look who it is–it's...it's Red Cap Boy!”

“And Pretty Little Girl, too! How have you been~?”

“Did you take care of your little errand in Threed?”

“So, you remember the Runaway Five, eh?”

“We're so inconspicuous, we didn't think we'd be recognized in a crowd like this!”

“I'm so glad to see you again!” said Ness. “This here is Jeff, he's our new friend. ...Oh, but...why are you all eating at a place like Bio-Ness Burger?”

“Well, you see...”

“We just had to try a food this popular as soon as we could.”

“That's just what celebrities do!”

“...Although since we do blend in so well, it probably wouldn't matter if we were a little behind the times.”

“...Oh, this is so cruel! I couldn't possibly eat another bite! …But I just want to keep eating!”

“Please try to control yourselves!” said Ness, sternly. “This stuff is dangerous, so please, whatever you do, don't eat any more!”

“Whaaaaa~t?”

“...B-but...”

“That's impossible...!”

“I need to eat more...”

“I gotta have more!”

“You're only going to get fat!” said Paula. Her voice seemed to crack through the air like a whip. “And you'll just keep getting fatter! You'll get so fat it will ruin your good health, and all your senses and reflexes will slow down. You won't be able to put on a proper show at all anymore!”

The Runaways were suddenly very quiet.

“...And then no one would want to come to another one of your concerts ever again, now, would they?” Paula added.

“...Pretty Little Girl is right,” said Lucky, the leader of the Runaways, as he nodded sincerely and carefully tried to get to his feet. “Life has no value for reckless old fools like us if we can't perform as a band. Just imagine it! What if our fingers got so fat we couldn't even work the strings on our instruments?!”

Brrrrrrrr! A chill ran through each of the Runaways.

“B-but Lucky, I'm still so hungry, I can't stand it!”

“My stomach hurts pretty bad already, though...”

“Just...just one more, one more, I swear...”

“I don't think we'd get that fat after just one more...”

“I want to eat more, too!” Lucky shouted, in his rough baritone voice. “But I also want to spend what's left of my life as a star–even if it means starving to death! I want to stay cool until the bitter end...!”

“Uhh...well, if you don't mind,” Jeff interjected, “why don't you try this on? It should suppress any weird cravings you have for food or drink.” He tied a black, glossy thing that looked like some sort of string around Lucky's arm.

“Huh? ...Oh, you weren't kidding!” said Lucky. “For some reason, I'm not hungry at all anymore!”

“Isn't it great?” said Jeff, with a smile. “It's a Magic Bracelet!”

“Whoa, gimme one, too!”

“Me too!”

“Gimme, gimme!”

“Please don't forget to give me one, too.”

One by one they were each given the black strings to wear, and in an instant, the Runaways were hale and hearty once more. That strange desire to keep eating had vanished into thin air, and they were feeling just fine!

“Thanks, man,” said Lucky. His black bracelet flashed in the light as he offered Jeff a handshake. “We'll never forget what you did for us, Preppy.” (A “preppy” is, generally speaking, a student of a classy school. Or something like a young executive.) “We have a gig tonight at the Topolla Theater. You should come check it out!”

Waving enthusiastically and dancing as they went, the Runaway Five took their leave. Ness and Paula, who had been staring in awe at Jeff for some time now, questioned him excitedly.

“That was incredible, what were those things?”

“...Some kind of powerful digestive aid device?”

“Yes and no,” Jeff replied, with a smirk. “They were left over scraps of electrical cords.”

“Electrical cords?”

“It's something called the placebo effect–like when someone believes that the water they're drinking is medicine, and so it works just like medicine. Those guys already thought it was strange that they didn't feel full after eating so much. And as entertainers, they really didn't want to end up becoming so out of shape that they couldn't perform. And so, the suggestion of the electrical cords worked for them.”

“...Well, do you think we should start giving them out to everyone in town?”

“It might not work the same way for every single person, though...”

“Right,” said Jeff. “But...it is just as I thought. The Bio-Ness Burger is doing something to their minds. Somehow, it's overriding their common sense, and bringing out some kind of limitless appetite or desire...so, how do we combat something like that...?”

And just then...

“...Mamaa!”

Very close to where the three of them were standing was a little boy wearing a blue baseball cap. He was holding hands with a lady in very classy-looking clothing, and he was crying out in a heartbroken voice.

“Michael...wants...to eat that!”

“That's junk food,” the mother in fancy clothes replied. “We shouldn't buy food from here. It's full of germs. When we get home, mama will make a delicious hamburger just for you.”

“No, no!” the child whined. “I wanna eat it, I wanna eat it, I wanna eat that. Everyone at school eats that. I wanna try it, too...”

“Wellll...I guess I can't help it,” said the mother with a sigh, as she shook her head gracefully. “...But, oh, what should I do? It really does smell very good...your mama kind of wants to try some too... Say, Michael, why don't we buy just one, and split it between us?”

“Really?!” Micheal cried.

...And with that, the mother and child gleefully bounded off to join that unbelievably crowded line.

“Shouldn't we try to stop them?” said Paula, as she tugged at Ness's sleeve. “We know that such a terrible thing will end up happening to little Michael, who looks like a tiny version of you, and his mama, too...”

“There's no point in trying to stop any of those people,” Ness replied, shaking his head sadly. “For now, all we can do is wait until tonight. ...And we should find a good place to hide!”

The three of them huddled together with their arms around each other's shoulders, and slowly they turned around.

Meanwhile from just behind them...

“I'm very sorry, but we'll be sold out very soon!” came the shout of one of the Bio-Ness Burger shop assistants. This was followed by screams, angry roars, and violent booing. “There are only two hundred burgers left–only two hundred left! From here on out, we're limiting it to ten burgers per person!” “We're very sorry for the inconvenience, but if you are behind the twentieth person in line, and you must, absolutely must have your burgers, please head for our other location to the south!” Upon hearing this, the customers immediately began to leave in droves.

“Maybe Micheal will be safe after all,” said Jeff, with a relieved sigh. “I'm sure his mother would rather just go home than stand in another line.”

“For today, anyway,” said Ness. He looked back over his shoulder, spotted Micheal, who was still throwing a fit and being dragged away by his mother, and he narrowed his eyes. “...But who knows about tomorrow. That's why we have to end this, tonight!”

The evening sun sank behind the huge Ferris wheel, and a song played out to signal the closing of the shops. The customers filed down the stairs and down the escalators, and then each set out on their own route home. The shop employees tidied up, then they turned off the lights. Suddenly a lonely wind kicked up, and a thin layer of clouds passed across a very round moon. The puppies in the pet shop began to whimper and whine.

There was the sound of a security guard's footsteps. His flashlight probed through the darkness.

Soon, these sights and sounds all faded away, too.

“...Alright.”

“Should we go?”

A cardboard box full of wee-wee pads for puppies slowly opened, and Ness crawled out of it. Jeff emerged from the shadow of a huge bag of rabbit food.

“Paula...hey, Paula, wake up!”

Rubbing her eyes and mumbling sleepily, Paula rose from the roof of the plush kitty-cat house she had made into her bed for the night.

The rooftop amusement park was completely deserted. The moon was full and the sky was cloudy. A red light which was meant to prevent airplane collisions blinked on and off at the top of a lightning rod. Three small shadows suddenly darted across the chilly, damp, and darkened concrete.

They rushed straight over to the Bio-Ness Burger stand. The tricolor awning was now folded up and stored away, but all those flags still fluttered in the night breeze. Jeff unlocked the stand's rear-door employee entrance. They crept inside.

The thin yellow beam of their penlight revealed a stainless steel sink, some shelves, and a huge refrigerator. They opened cabinets and drawers as they went. They found plastic containers, paper boxes...straws, cups...

“...I don't think there's any actual food here.”

“They did say they were sold out, didn't they?”

“Hey, wait a minute...the alien detector is going off!” said Jeff. The watch on his wrist was making a quiet beeping sound. It was the watch the Mr. Saturns had given him, and it was far more technologically advanced than it looked. “It's here...in this huge tank!”

“This thing?”

“Is this...water?!”

They loosened some screws and took apart the tank's hinges. Then, heaving with all their might, Ness and Jeff opened the lid. They aimed their light down inside.

“There's something in there,” said Jeff. “Down at the bottom.”

“It's glowing!” said Paula.

“I'll try to get it,” said Ness.

“Do you think that's safe? What if it bites, or something?”

“I think I'll be alright,” Ness replied, and he reached down into the tank. He found a small, hard object. It didn't seem to be a living thing. It was bumpy and uneven. He pulled it out.

“A golden...statue...?!”

That's right, it was a small replica of that Evil Mani Mani–a Mini-Mini Mani Mani! A miniature model of that unsettling figure Everdred had wanted so badly, and which had made Carpainter lose his mind!

As I'm sure you remember, dear readers, we last saw the original version of this statue near the increasingly girthy and terribly sickly Pokey!

“This isn't gold,” said Jeff, reading the screen on his watch. “It looks a lot like gold, but this is something a little different. It's emitting some kind of faint aura. It seems like an isotope, or something. But the watch isn't displaying its atomic number. Hey...no matter how you look at it, this isn't any kind of earthly substance, Ness!”

“And it was in the water!” said Paula, as she clapped her hand to her face. “That means this might not only be affecting the burger shops! What if they planted something like this in the town's water supply...?”

“He probably wouldn't do that, to avoid getting affected, himself,” said Ness, coldly. “If it's only been laced into specific hamburgers and coffees at specific shops, he'll be perfectly fine as long as he avoids eating and drinking there, while everyone else loses their minds.”

“Who do you mean by 'he'?” asked Jeff.

“The one profiting off these things,” Ness replied, furrowing his brow.

“...Pokey?” Paula whispered, in a hushed voice. “Ness, you're thinking of that Pokey guy, aren't you? That must be...the guy who was so mean to us when we were trapped back in Threed. Oh, that's right! He asked you about the Ness Burger recipe back then, too...!”

“Hey, what are you doing in there?!”

SNAP! Suddenly, the lights came on! They were blinded! They shielded their eyes with their hands, and Ness quickly hid the stolen Mini-Mini Mani Mani behind his back.

“What's this? Just some kids, huh?” the man laughed, loudly. He appeared to be the department store's security guard.

He held an unsettlingly large baton at the ready. “Little thieves,” he chuckled. “You really wanted burgers that badly, huh? Alright, come with me.”

The three of them slowly stood up. Paula shot the other two a signaling wink.

“W...we're so sorry, Mister! Sniffle!” Paula suddenly began to sob, as tears poured down her cheeks. “W...waahh...we...ohh, ohh...we got looooost~! Waaaahh!”

“O-oh, hey, hey! There now, don't cry, don't cry!” said the security guard. The kind-hearted man was suddenly very flustered. After all, even with her face all screwed up from crying her heart out, she was still such a pretty little girl that she could charm just about anyone. She had also very capriciously positioned herself in such a way that the light would hit her the most dramatically. “If you keep crying like that,” the man went on, “you'll spoil that pretty face of yours. So calm down, please calm down!”

While all this was going on, Ness and Jeff quietly slipped out into the darkness.

“Waaaah! But you're so angry, Mister!” cried Paula. “You yelled at me! SOB! You're so scaryyy~! Waaaaaah!”

“Oh...no, no...ahem! I'm not scary!” he replied. “I'm a nice guy. I promise.”

“...Really?” said Paula, as she looked up at the security guard through the gaps between her fingers. “...You're not angry?”

“No, no, not at all!” said the guard, and he spread his arms out wide. “Look, I'll even get rid of this!” And...whoosh! He threw his baton as far as he could.

“Oh thank goodness!” said Paula, with a grin. Her smile was so bright that if this had been a comic instead of a novel, she'd have been suddenly surrounded by blossoming roses and lilies. “Well then...HYAAAH!”

Paula's beautiful, slender leg flashed up into the air, and for an instant, the hem of her skirt fluttered to a risky degree. Then...WHAM!...she landed a forceful kick right on that dumbfounded security guard's unusually long chin! “Ggraah-hoo-howw!” he cried. The guard was knocked onto his back, and his flashlight went flying!

“Sorry, Mister!” Paula giggled. “Bye bye!”

Wearing the smile of an angel, Paula held the hem of her skirt between her fingers and curtsied politely, then she ran off to catch up with Ness and Jeff. “Hey, wait for me!” she cried.

“...Girls,” Jeff mumbled as he ran, “are kinda scary.”

“...Definitely,” Ness agreed.

And just as they ducked between those rows of picnic tables...

“Wait...!”

...cried a voice.

Pop-pop-pop-pop-pop! POP! Suddenly, all the lights in the amusement park came back on! Brruuum...brrrrrruuuum! With a dull roar, the Ferris wheel, the coaster, and the merry-go-round came to life. Startled, the three of them quickly turned toward the voice. In the middle of the event stage, bathed in pink and green lights, there was a massive crowd of men in wrestling and karate uniforms, with their leader standing confidently out in front. Wearing a bright red cloak, silver boots, and a blue mask, and with a bow tie wrapped around an almost non-existent neck, this figure was terribly ugly, and terribly overweight!

“Wa-hahahahaha! Did you really think you could get away that easily?” His voice, echoing through the microphone with a bit of vibrato, was also quite irritating. “It's over for you, Ness! After all, you were always destined to grovel at my feet!”

“...Pokey!” Ness cried, as he heaved a massive sigh. “I knew you had something to do with all this, but...what the heck happened to you?”

“Heh-heh-heh, I've gained some weight, sure. But is it so bad to be fat?!” Pokey challenged him, aggressively. “I'm nothing short of greatness, and now, even by all outward appearances, I'm the literal definition of 'great'! Adjusting to it was a bit of a rough process, but now I'm just fine–in fact, I'm in perfect form!”

“But, you look so...gross!” said Paula. She didn't even try to hide her disgust.

“Jeeze, don't provoke him!” said Jeff, with a grimace.

“Now go, my adorable little guards!” Pokey cried. He suddenly spread his cloak open and tossed gold coins from both hands like a fountain. The jingling sound of the coins was incredible! “If you manage to catch the three of them, you'll be handsomely rewarded!”

“Woo-hoo!”

“You got it!”

Clomp, clomp, clomp! The former wrestlers and karate pros climbed down off of the stage one by one! They flung chairs off to the side and flipped over tables. They were getting closer to the trio every second!

“Th...t-this...this is bad, Ness!” Jeff stammered. Peering into the screen on his watch, he grabbed Ness's shoulder. “Every one of these guys is giving off an alien aura! This doesn't make any sense!”

“But, they're all just regular, ordinary people, aren't they?” Paula cried, as she clasped her hands together. “When they get home, they'll all be wonderful husbands again–good papas who love their children! ...We can't fight them!”

Ness was silent. He stood very still.

He was biting his lip and staring straight ahead, at the stage–at Pokey.

The guards circled around them and closed in, steadily. Paula and Jeff stood back to back.

“Kiiyaaaa!”

Paula flinched as one of the guards shouted, then they all dashed in to grab them! But at just that moment...

FLAAASH!

Ness thrust his arms straight into the air and held something high above his head. It was that golden statue–the Mini-Mini Mani Mani! It sparkled dazzlingly in the amusement park lights. Like a small bundle of laser beams, it reflected blinding golden light in every direction! The beams shot straight into the eyes of each of the guards, and they cried out in surprise and stopped in their tracks.

“Things like this,” Ness began in a low voice, as he glared at Pokey and gripped the Mani Mani tighter. “...Things like this...can never win over the human mind!”

Ness's arms were engulfed in a pure, white light! His desires, his prayers, the pleas of his heart were answered as a frightening power spread through the boy's small, slender fingers...!

Squeeze! The golden figure was crushed in his hands. As if it were made of soft, melting chocolate, he twisted it, mangled it, crumpled it, and then finally... SPAAARK!

“Uwaaauugh!”

“Gya-haaaa!”

The crowd of guards erupted into anguished cries, and then, clutching at their own heads and throats, they slumped to the ground.

“...It...disappeared?” said Jeff, and he held out his watch for Paula to see. “Hey, look! That strange reading from before, the alien traces...they're almost completely gone now!”

“That's amazing!” Paula cried. Her eyes sparkled as she looked up at Ness. He stood his ground, unmoving. “Ness, you're amazing!”

Ness did not turn to look at her. Instead, he lowered his arms and began walking forward. He quietly dropped both his bat and what had once been the Mini-Mini Mani Mani, and was now nothing more than a brittle hunk of stone.

“Uh-whoa...w-w-whoa...!” Up on the stage, Pokey's flabby body jiggled all over as he staggered and backed away. Thud! He hit a wall, and the recoil sent him tumbling forward. His cloak got caught on something, and it tore off. “Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Pokey stammered. “Hey, stop, Ness, cut it out! Don't come any closer! That was all just a joke, a joke!”

Ness slowly continued to advance. He stared straight ahead, straight at Pokey. He said nothing.

“...Could it be?” said Jeff, as he and Paula knelt near the ruined Mani Mani. Every now and then, the filthy-looking mass would sparkle with red and blue light. “...Is this thing...a meteorite...?!”

“You must be angry, I know,” said Pokey, with an amicable, groveling smile as he tore off his mask and slunk sideways along the wall. “You have every right to be angry. We made your precious Ness Burger into the butt of a joke! But, please try to put yourself in my shoes–it made my dad and Mr. Monotoli so happy! Look at me, I'm just a lonely, fat kid, you know? I've never been praised or loved by anyone...can't you understand? See, I get kinda carried away when people speak highly of me...I'm not sure how to put it quite right, but, you know what they say–'When flattered, even a pig will climb a tree', and...oh-whoa!” Suddenly he ran out of stage to stand on, and Pokey fell to the ground. “Eee-yowch...huh?” Across from where he had fallen was the boarding deck for the Ferris wheel. Pokey still wore the expression of a trapped animal, but suddenly his eyes shone with a devilish green glint. Stumbling forward, he began to run!

Ness scowled. He dashed after Pokey.

“Heehee, see ya!” Pokey chuckled. He scrambled into one of the cars on the Ferris wheel (a yellow one), stuck his chubby backside out through the window and, spank, spank!, he whacked it teasingly. The car was climbing higher and higher! “Hah-hahahaha, how's that, Ness? Come and get me, if you dare! ...What the?”

Ness jumped swiftly onto the Ferris wheel! He was three cars away from Pokey. As his car rose steadily higher, Ness climbed out through the window and grabbed the roof, pulling himself up onto it using a chin-up technique.

“You...y-y-y-you're really coming up here?” Pokey stuttered. “You're really serious?” He bit his finger with chattering teeth as he shivered in disbelief. Then, with a sudden HUFF!, his nostrils flared and his eyes became fierce as he removed one of those professional wrestling-style boots and threw it.

It came hurtling straight for Ness's face! Pokey's boot grazed the top of his head as he hurriedly ducked, but it threw him off-balance, and he stumbled. Paula screamed! Ness grabbed one of the support beams and braced himself.

With a bit of difficulty due to his bulging belly, Pokey leaned forward and took off his other boot, and he threw that one, too. “Hey, just fall already!” he shouted. As the boot spun wildly through the air, the spur on its heel caught the light and it gleamed. This time, it hit Ness squarely on the shoulder! With a small “Oof!”, he clutched his shoulder and fell over backwards onto the roof of the car. Thud! The back of his head struck the car and he saw stars. His mind felt a bit fuzzy. “Ahahahaha, serves you right!” Pokey cackled. Ness began to slide limply across the roof of the Ferris wheel car. Paula screamed again! His head slid over the edge of the car, snapping his neck back, and this shock brought him back to his senses. He grabbed the edge of the roof, used his momentum to swing himself back up, and he glared at Pokey once again. “Ahahahaha!” Pokey laughed, as he ducked back inside his car.

Ness carefully stood back up. The Ferris wheel car continued to rise into the cold night sky, with a full view of the city lights down below. He had to climb higher and higher, then higher still, and get to Pokey! The wind rushed by, ruffling his shirt. Ness flattened himself against the Ferris wheel car to let the wind pass. ...But his hat was blown away!

“Ness, stop, pleeease~!” Paula cried, as loud as she could. She was clutching Ness's bat as she caught his fallen hat. “Please stop this, it's too dangerous!”

“Gah...damn it, what do I do?!” Jeff muttered to himself. He had made his way into the Ferris wheel's control booth. He grabbed a lever and tried to push it with all of his might, but for some reason, it wouldn't budge. “Why won't this stupid thing stop?!” He kicked at some sort of box by his feet, but it didn't do any good.

The wind finally died down. Ness steadied his breathing and stood back up again. Then he bent down. He gathered all of his courage and strength...he concentrated...and then he jumped! “Aaaaaah!” Paula shrieked, and she couldn't help but to shut her eyes. ...But when she opened them again, her shoulders slumped in relief. Ness was clinging to the undercarriage of the next car up! Gritting his teeth, he did another chin-up and pulled himself up again. It looked as though he planned to keep climbing higher!

“...This is crazy!” Paula muttered, as she put her hands to her cheeks. “It's crazy, but...I think he's going to do it! ...Ness, you're so brave!” Without meaning to, she smiled.

Jeff opened a panel in the control booth and looked over all the wiring. “Oh, damn it,” he sighed. “This is impossible, I can't tell which is which! ...If I cut the wrong one, Ness might get thrown off!” This was a particularly large Ferris wheel, and he still had about five minutes before Ness reached the top. Jeff looked up into the night sky all lit up by the moon, then he furrowed his brow and seemed to be thinking something over. Then, suddenly, he dashed out of the booth.

“Paula, let's get some kind of mat ready, in case he falls!” Jeff cried.

“Oh, good idea!”

The two of them ran across the rooftop and over to that dreadful Bio-Ness burger stand, where they began trying to tear off that big, shady awning. The Ferris wheel continued to turn, and Ness continued to climb. He had already cleared the next car. He was finally about to jump to the yellow car Pokey was riding in. And Pokey's car was just about to reach the very top!

“Okay, now, pull!” cried Jeff.

“Alright! It came off!” said Paula.

But just as the two of them rushed over to the base of the Ferris wheel, carrying the awning which had been rolled up neatly like a boat's folded sail...

Pata-pata-pata-pata-pata-pata! All around them there was a terrible pounding sound, and from the roof of the next building over (the Monotoli Building!) a huge black thing suddenly came flying toward them!

“A helicopter?!” Jeff cried. “Damn it, has he had that thing ready this whole time?!”

“POOOOOOO...KEEEYYYYY......!” cried Aloysius Minch, as he lowered a rope ladder out of the helicopter's window. The movement of the helicopter caused a Doppler effect on his voice, and made it feel like something from a movie shown in Sensurround. “Hey, grab on, Pokey!”

“Why thank you, papa!” said Pokey, with a smirk. He leaned his hefty body out of the yellow car and climbed onto the rope ladder. As he did, the helicopter jerked and wavered...but...no, no, it was alright. ...It would hold his weight.

“Yahoooooo! Heh-hehehehe! You see this, Ness? What do you think?” Swaying his unsightly, bulging body back and forth on that rope ladder as if it were a swing, Pokey came right up next to Ness's car on the Ferris wheel. “You're a real stupid dummy of a fool, you know! Thinking someone like you could actually catch me...hah~!”

A winch pulled up the rope ladder, and Pokey's massive body disappeared into the helicopter. The helicopter, which had been moving steadily away from Ness, suddenly reversed course and approached him once again. Was it going to attack him? He became nervous...until Pokey reappeared in the window, showing off the original Mani Mani while cackling loudly.

Then, the helicopter suddenly turned around and headed into the southern sky, off toward the ocean. It sped gradually away, and soon it was nothing more than a speck among the clouds.

“POOOOOOOKEEEEYYYY!”

Ness's frustrated cry rang out through the streets of the darkened city.

“Oh, goodness...I don't know exactly why I became so obsessed with money, money, and more money,” said Mr. Monotoli. His timid, weasel-like face was red with embarrassment, and he hung his head in shame. “We'll stop making those phony 'Bio-Ness Burgers', and from now on, cross my heart, we'll make them just like they do at the flagship restaurant in Onett. We'll only be making perfect, genuine Ness Burgers, using the original recipe! ...And I must ask your forgiveness, I'm so very sorry that this happened!”

Mr. Monotoli had been left behind on the rooftop from which that helicopter had taken off, and he had been sitting on the ground all alone and in a stupor. Now that the Evil Mani Mani was nowhere near him, his ravenous desire for a boundless supply of wealth had vanished, but he hadn't forgotten all that had gone on while he had been acting so strange and hadn't quite been himself–in fact, he remembered all the details very well.

Filled with shame, regret, and a newfound sense of responsibility, Mr. Monotoli intently vowed that his new goal in life was to succeed in business through compassion and consideration for the welfare of others. For starters, he immediately hired every one of those security guards from before (who had all suddenly gone back to being kind but strong men once again, as if they'd been exorcized of some kind of demon!) at a special rate for the night, and dispatched them to retrieve the water tanks from each shop. Ness removed all of those eerie Mani Mani statues and he destroyed them using his PSI.

At long last, the night finally came to an end. The Monotoli Foundation called for an emergency meeting and decided to remodel that huge Monotoli building into a facility centered around helping those in need throughout the city. The foundation also unanimously approved the donation of a massive amount of money to the Fourside Hospital, in order to take care of the people who had severely damaged their stomachs by eating and drinking too much, or who had been injured in all the fights that had broken out. The Monotoli department store would now strive to be an oasis of convenience and comfort for the people of Fourside, instead of focusing solely on profit.

Everyone's burger addiction also vanished completely, and a peaceful liveliness returned to the big city of Fourside.

Thanks to this, Ness was able to go and check out the vacant lot that Pokey had ordered to be so strictly blocked off. Sure enough, he found another new power spot there. Ness's Sound stone recorded the melody of Magnet Hill. This helped to lift the despondent mood Ness had been in ever since his battle on the Ferris wheel, and he became his energetic, brave, and sporting self once more.

Then, as a favor from Mr. Monotoli, the three of them were taken for a relaxing half-day tour of the sights of the city. They got to see huge tyrannosaurus bones at the dinosaur museum, and enjoyed a lively performance by the Runaway Five at the Topolla Theater. They were also treated to a delicious dinner at the finest restaurant in the Monotoli Department Store.

It was during this wonderful meal that they received a phone call from Apple Kid. He had fixed the formerly wrecked and abandoned Sky Runner! Now they'd be able to chase after that fleeing helicopter. They had to stop Pokey from doing whatever it was he was planning on doing next!

The members of the Monotoli Foundation and a great many residents of Fourside were there to see them off as they took another exciting tour bus ride back to Threed, courtesy of the Runaway Five, whose performance contract had just expired. They had a brief, happy reunion with Apple Kid, and then they climbed into the shiny, newly renovated Sky Runner–which would have three passengers, this time.

“Alright, let's go!”

“Due south! Across the ocean!”

...But what would be waiting for them there?

“I can't say for sure,” Paula began, “but I feel like we're going to meet someone else, soon...someone with a wonderful and mysterious aura. ...And they are not a bad person at all. In fact, I'm very sure they're another new friend for us!”

Her prediction was bright and cheerful, but Ness was doing his best to hide the fact that he'd suddenly had a somewhat lonesome feeling. After all, he would soon be leaving his familiar home of Eagleland.

Before long, he'd be experiencing the unfamiliar sights and sounds of an entirely new country.

Chapter 7 – The Town Closest to Heaven

Distorted by heat haze, the sun began to sink below the horizon. Along the perfectly level streak of red created by the rays of the setting sun, gentle waves rose and fell. A ritzy-looking resort stood beside a beautiful white beach covered in sand as fine as powdered sugar.

On small, gently swaying boats, or over beach towels that were still warm, or in the shadows of silhouetted palm trees, couples had come from all over the world to bask themselves in the season of love. They entwined their arms around one another, rubbed their cheeks together, exchanged deep, longing glances, and excitedly twirled each other's hair with their fingers. There was also a pair of young children, with their red bucket and yellow shovel, completely fixated on the sandcastle they were building together.

They forgot all the sorrows of the world, had no regard for the flow of time, and even forgot their plans for dinner the next night as each lover reveled in the ephemeral nature of their partner's shimmering spiritual energy. ...That's the kind of place this was.

My goodness, there were so many couples next to couples near more couples with extra couples on the side! All along that twilit, breeze-swept shore, there were couples at almost every fifteen-foot interval. If there were such a thing as a Couples-Watching Club, this would be a Couple Treasure Trove–a verified Couple Sanctuary–and such a club would be eternally grateful to find a spot like this, for sure.

“Je t'aime, mon amour,” whispered Alan and Pierre, in moody voices that tickled the ear. “C'est magnifique, la vie en rose,” said Louie and Leo, as they softly raised their lovers' chins.

“Aux Champs-Élysées, très bien!” replied Marie and Catherine, longingly fluttering their long eyelashes. “Chocolat au lait, pudding à la mode!” whispered Françoise and Charlotte, sweetly and tenderly. “Caramel bon bon...”

Jean and Genevieve, their gently parted lips held so close, were just about to bring them together when suddenly...

WHIIIIIIIIINN!

...An ear-splitting metallic sound echoed through the evening darkness! Startled, the couples looked up into the sky, scanning back and forth.

“Qu'est-ce que c'est (What is that)?!” Someone pointed somewhere high above. Blue eyes, green eyes, hazel eyes...all eyes were drawn to that one spot in the sky, where a tiny little pinprick quickly became a round, canary-yellow craft. And it was headed right for them!

A pair of lovers on a small boat paddled desperately to get out of its way. Couples who had been sprawled out on their beach towels jumped up and stumbled as they raced across the sand. Two sweethearts who had been flirting in the shadow of a palm tree grabbed one another with a yelp. The tiny couple who had been building their sandcastle looked on with their mouths hanging open, too frightened even to stand. All along the beach couples tried to run, bumping into one another and getting all mixed up. There was turmoil as they tried to hold hands to stay together, only to realize soon afterward that they'd taken hold of the wrong girl or guy. It was utter chaos!

But all that panic on dry land was really quite unnecessary in the end. That canary-yellow flying object was getting larger and larger by the second, wavering unsteadily and dropping down through the air like a stone. A shock wave tore across the surface of the sea, which was still tinged with slight orange hues from the setting sun. As the spindly legs of that spaceship-like object touched down on the water, they kicked up a tremendous white wake that trailed along behind it. On and on it went, until...ssssplaaaaashhh......SSSPLAAAAASH!

Between the road running along the beach and the beach itself, there was a ten-foot concrete seawall. The Sky Runner (whoops, I got ahead of myself–yes, that round, yellow craft was none other than the recently repaired Sky Runner!) crashed straight into this concrete barrier and stopped dead.

As all the couples, who had been stunned into a sort of mindless silence, looked on–BANG!...the door was kicked open from the inside with so much force that it fell right off its hinges. Three figures–weak and wobbly children, it looked like–tried to help each other out of the craft.

“Did...did we make it? Where...where are we?”

“I think...maybe this is heaven...”

“Oh...yeah, I'm pretty sure I died, too...”

Sure enough, this group of three, all of whom were either plopping themselves down or collapsing backwards into the sand, were Ness, Paula, and Jeff.

“What the...? It's just a bunch of kids!”

“And what a saucy little girl! I can't believe she has two boyfriends!”

“Let's get out of here!”

The couples, frustrated by the fact that their perfect mood had been completely ruined, grumbled angrily and turned on their heels. “Whoa, that girl is so cute! ❤” cried a playboy who had been instantly smitten with Paula, as the young girl at his side hastily pulled on his sleeve. “And those boys aren't bad either!” said a wealthy-looking woman as she licked her lips, much to the shock of her companion. Eventually the onlookers scattered, each vocalizing their own judgments, but the three of them were too tuckered out to even notice.

“Jeeze...”

“Well...at least we made it, right?”

“Oh, but we broke this thing again...and this time, I think it's beyond fixing.”

The Sky Runner, which had been flying along so smoothly up until then, had become a pile of useless junk in just one instant.

“So, tell us...why did this happen, Jeff?”

“Ah, yeah, about that,” Jeff began. “I think...well, you remember when Ness turned on the microwave, so he could heat up a burger? And Paula, you started running the vacuum. And then...I wanted to check our coordinates, so I booted up the computer, and suddenly...poof! Everything went dark. ...I think we probably overloaded the circuitry, and tripped a breaker.” Jeff took off his glasses and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Because of all that, I think the main computer system froze up.”

All this had happened far out at sea. After a flurry of confusion, panic, and pandemonium, they had somehow managed to guide the Sky Runner, which had never had any sort of manual operating system installed, to the nearest land mass they could see. They were full of relief, and also exhaustion.

“...Oh, I see,” said Ness. “I guess it's like what happens when you run the air conditioner, the hair dryer, and the toaster all at once.”

“If the breaker couldn't handle all that, it would have been nice if someone had told us so from the start!” Paula grumbled, as she took off her sand-filled boots and emptied them. “Then we would have known not to run all those appliances at once!”

“I'm sorry...but, unfortunately, I didn't know that would happen, either,” Jeff replied, as he wiped the lenses of his glasses with his shirt. “Last time, I was the only one aboard. So I hadn't even considered running that many things at once.”

“Well, for now, at least no one's hurt,” said Paula, as she took a deep breath and stood up. Then, very casually, she happened to look over at Jeff, and she was suddenly taken aback.

Jeff's shoulders were slumped and his head was tilted a bit to the side as he rubbed his glasses diligently. ...But with those obstructive glasses out of the way, Paula could better see those long, full eyelashes, those dignified eyebrows, the refined shape of his nose, and those bangs falling gently over a somewhat regal brow... A sweet breeze began to blow in from who knows where, tickling her nostrils.

“Jeff!” she cried. “Wow, I'm surprised! I had no idea that you were so...handsome!”

“Er, I u-uhh...uhh,” Jeff stammered. He put his glasses back on in a panic. “Well, I don't think so...”

“Don't say that!” said Paula. “What are you so embarrassed about? Let me take a better look at you...!” She snatched the glasses away. “Oh-whoa! I can hardly recognize you! You're like a whole different person, it's a shame you'd try to hide such a pretty face, Jeff, you silly boy!”

“Give them back!” cried Jeff. He stood up, a bit shaky without his glasses, and began groping blindly through the air. He was unusually curt, and his voice had become very sharp. Ness thought he should say something like, “Okay, this has gone a little too far,” but instead he swallowed his words and looked on nervously. The light-hearted Paula didn't seem to notice that anything was wrong.

“Oh, yes, yes, that's it!” she gasped. “That fiery expression suits that beautiful face of yours, perfectly! ❤ Say, Jeff, from now on, why don't you wear contacts instead?” Flitter, flitter, flit! She ran in circles like a fluttering butterfly.

“Paula, stop playing around!” Jeff cried. A swing! ...And a miss. His arms and legs were trembling. “Cut it out!”

“And why should I? This is fun!” Paula giggled. She put her hands on her hips and opened her eyes wide. “I'm not afraid of you~! If you want these so badly, then take them from me! Come get them! Ee-hehehehehe!”

“Come on...!” Jeff moaned.

He dashed at her. Paula would run in a straight line, then jump off to the side or slide in the opposite direction entirely. They kicked up the coral sands as they went–the pursuer and the pursued. They frolicked together like happy puppies, the very image of a young couple in the prime of their youth.

Nearby, a fashionably dressed elderly couple sparked up a conversation as they held hands. “Well, well, those two are just like us, when we were their age...” “Oh they are!” “Life is short, so fall in love, little girl!” “So true, so true!” They continued their chat as they walked leisurely down the path along the beach.

“...Love, huh...?” Ness muttered, as he rested his cheek in his hand to ponder this. “I wonder why Jeff seems so angry, then.”

“Secret crush, eh, boy?”

A voice came from behind him. Ness turned and saw a stranger looking over at Jeff and Paula with a smile. He was a small man, wearing a stylish Hawaiian shirt and sunglasses, and his thin blond hair was combed to the side like a wheat field battered by a rough storm. He crossed his flip-flop-adorned feet and fiddled with the single violet flower he held near his lips as he leaned against the pulverized Sky Runner.

“A taste of love is hard to come by,” said the man. “A woman's heart rushes and flows like spring rain to a river. ...Now, now, don't make a face like that, it's nothing to be ashamed of! Jealousy can be as bittersweet as an orange, and envy claws at the heart like burning liquor. And before we sober up, it can be the source of a strength that is quite out of the ordinary. Isn't that what youth, and being the hero of your own story, are all about?”

“I...uh...?” muttered the very puzzled Ness.

“But you know,” the man went on, “in these southern climes, when compared to those of us who were cursed with a Y chromosome, women are blessed with a far superior natural intuition and instinct–a sixth sense. Your innocent and defenseless Petit Lapin must have succumbed quickly to this country's infamous Fever of Love! You are noble and just, yet far too apprehensive, and if only you could smash the degenerated walls of your heart like so many atoms, I believe you could put an end to your futile struggle to resist this atmosphere! ...Oh Lord help us, life is but a firework–so beautiful, but so fleeting!”

“Atmosphere...what are you talking about?” said Ness.

“The earth's firmament. Do you not know this word? It is a scientific term. You would use it to say something like, 'The temperature of gallium nitride rises in an atmosphere of nitrogen'. Don't you think it's chic?”

“Whatever you're trying to say, I don't understand a word of it,” Ness replied. He was starting to get a little annoyed, and he turned away with a huff. “If you want to talk about complicated things, go do it with that guy in the glasses over there.”

“I like you better,” the man in the flip-flops replied. He suddenly leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Ness' shoulders. “I think you're far more beautiful than someone like him, darling.”

“W-w...w-what the hell?!” Ness stuttered wildly, and he leapt away. “Don't make weird jokes like that!”

“It's no joke!” the man replied. “I'm always serious. Because my name is Truman– and I'm a man who only tells the truth!” The man's wicked, purple lips curled into a smile, and he pulled a gleaming, pearl-gray business card out of the breast pocket of his Hawaiian shirt. In thin, gold, and elegant cursive writing, it said only Truman Ahody–Artist. “I can sense your aura, oh anguished angel–these gray eyes of mine only ever see through to the unclouded truth, and they have long predicted that you are no ordinary child. The weight of the world must be heavy on your shoulders, the mid-winter cold must chill your bare feet...but, if you're ever looking for advice, you can call on me anytime! I'm always at the Stoic Club, from nightfall until morning every single day, you know. ...Salut, tu!”

Truman gave the violet a quick kiss and threw it over the head of a very baffled Ness, then he took one graceful bow and walked off, humming as he went.

“What the heck...was that...?” Ness muttered, still in a bit of a confused daze.

“Ness!” cried Jeff. He came running over, having finally retrieved his glasses. “Hey, are you okay?”

“...Okay?” said Ness. “Uh, what do you mean?”

“We're sorry we left you all alone,” said Paula. She sounded a bit winded as she came to join them. “You must have been so scared, being approached by a creep like that.”

“A creep?” said Ness, blinking his eyes in shock. “That guy...?”

Jeff and Paula exchanged glances and shook their heads, as if to say, There's no use trying to explain.

“Well, anyway, we should find a place to stay for the night.”

...But this was the height of vacation season. All the hotels were completely full, apparently, although Ness and his friends wondered if perhaps the hotel employees were simply offended by the look of this scruffy group of kids. They were turned away here, and turned away there, so in the end, since it couldn't hurt, they decided to try the biggest, most imposing and expensive-looking one–L'hotel du Summers.

They passed under a beautiful bougainvillea arch and found a building that looked like a small castle with a vast courtyard. There was a bright green lawn and a flower bed of many colors. They could smell the sweet aroma of honeysuckles, and hear the passionate songs of the various birds of this southern land. Several carved statues depicting characters of myth and legend were showered by a huge water fountain that changed its shape rhythmically.

“This is...incredible!”

“I bet this place is really expensive...”

“Y-yeah...I think I can use my debit card, but...”

As they slowly and timidly climbed the gently sloping path ahead, they were overtaken by a pink limousine that was more than twice the length of an average car.

Inside the limousine, there was a stunningly beautiful woman in a pure white chemise dress, wrapped in a gorgeous fur stole. They wondered if perhaps she was a famous actress, or something like that. The car stopped in front of the hotel's entrance. A doorman in a gaudy coat adorned with shoulder patches, tassels, and gold buttons, and a green hat that looked like the kind a security guard might wear, immediately dashed over to it. He gleefully extended his arm and the beautiful woman took it gracefully, with a soft smile. She walked slowly and carefully on six-inch high heels. Her tight-fitting dress fully accented the swaying of her perfectly round hips and backside with every step she took.

“S...she's quite voluptuous,” said a very astounded Jeff.

“...She's definitely...a very mature-looking woman,” Ness replied. She reminded him a little bit of his mama, but since he'd probably be accused of having a “mother complex” or something like that if he were to say that out loud, he kept it to himself.

“What, that old lady?” said Paula, as she turned away with a huff. “A bit of bustiness is fine and all, but she actually looks a bit too chubby, don't you think?”

Taking advantage of the fact that everyone around them had been completely captivated by this beautiful woman, the three of them crept in through the hotel's main door, which was made of glass and framed in gold.

Finished in marble, the entranceway looked like something out of an ancient temple or a museum. The floor was so slick and shiny that it seemed you could practice ice hockey on it, and the many lavish pillars were so thick that even an adult wouldn't have been able to wrap their arms completely around them. Across the unbelievably high ceiling, there were lightly painted carvings of angels playing trumpets, maidens scattering flowers, and a man with a rather severe expression on his face who was holding a sword in one hand and a set of scales in the other, as if he were about to pass judgment on someone. Beside the front desk, which was covered in flowers, there was the largest staircase they had ever seen, leading up to the next floor in a heart-shaped arc.

“Welcome!” said a tall, handsome hotel employee, as he approached the three of them. “Do you have a reservation with us?” He sounded polite, but there was something unsettling about his tone.

“...No, we don't, but–” Ness started to say, when...

“–Well, you know that woman who just walked in here?”

...Paula finished the sentence for him. She was speaking in an alluring, husky voice, as if her throat were sore. She swept her golden, curly hair over her shoulder, and her blue eyes sparkled as she assumed a strangely careless pose. “Just between you and me,” she continued, “that's my mama.”

“Uhh...”

Both the hotel employee and her companions stood there with their mouths open in shock, but Paula, with an impish look on her charming face, smiled confidently. “Papa's afraid she might be having another affair,” she went on. “He told me to follow her and keep an eye on her.”

“...Oh I see, it's that kind of situation, hmm,” the hotel employee replied, with a nod and a knowing look. “I understand. Your mother is staying in our Aphrodite Suite, so we'll prepare the next room over, the 'Ercules Suite, for you.”

“Merci beaucoup,” said Paula. “But...you can't tell anyone, okay?”

“Of course, I understand,” said the hotel employee. He bowed very deeply, and then he spoke right into Paula's ear. “...But if I may be so rude as to inquire, simply for my own reference...little miss, which one is your father?”

“Oh!” cried Paula, as she clapped her hands to her cheeks and her eyelashes fluttered, as if these words were very painful to her. “My real father? You would ask me something like that? ...The one thing I'd like to know, more than anything else in the world...?”

“I sympathize, I'm sorry,” said the hotel employee, as he nodded many, many times. “Well then...please, right this way. …Let me carry your luggage.”

Paula very naturally took the hotel employee's elbow in her hands, and together they gracefully ascended the heart-shaped staircase.

“Where did that come from–that voice?” Jeff whispered.

“...And that flirty look?” Ness replied, with a very pensive expression.

“Girls are...”

“...Kinda scary.”

The 'Ercules...er, “Hercules” Suite, as it's more commonly pronounced, was on the top floor of the southern wing of the hotel, and, naturally, it had an ocean view.

Just below their intricately-patterned iron balcony there was a private beach. The elevator connected to their suite could take them directly to it in no time at all. And, even though the ocean was right there, there was also a pool with a painting of an orchid at the bottom. Someone was down there relaxing in an easy chair, and it was very possible that she looked more risqué with that bathing suit on than she would have if she weren't wearing one at all. ...It was the woman from the suite next to theirs.

The Hercules suite had a wide open living room that would be perfect for house parties, two bedrooms, a combination walk-in-closet and powder room, and a sparkling kitchen. There were even two bathrooms! This suite appeared to be bigger than Ness's entire house.

Both beds were large enough to be professional wrestling rings. The one in the room closest to the kitchen was made up with relatively simple blue-toned linens, but the one in the room farther back was very different. The bedspread was black with pink satin ribbons and embroidery, and when they pulled it back they found two fluffy, puffy pillows in matching colors, nestled together perfectly with an herbal pouch placed on top. The lace curtain draped over the bed was adorned with a pink and gold floral pattern, and its canopy was supported by pillars shaped like half-naked maidens holding up offerings of flowers. On the bedside table there was a neatly folded nightgown, a silver wine cooler covered in a layer of frost, a basket filled past the brim with fruits, and a bouquet of crimson roses whose beautiful scent was strong enough to evoke tears!

So then, this was...a suite for newlyweds? ...And a bed meant for honeymoons? The instant the boys realized this, their faces turned bright red. However...

“Eeeek, this is amazing! I call this one! ❤” Paula cried happily, as she leapt straight onto the bed. She rolled around all over it. “Wow, it's so soft! It smells so good! And it feels so good! Hey, don't be shy, you two. Why don't you take a seat over here?”

“Uhh...no thanks, I'm good,” said Jeff.

“I'm gonna...find out where the emergency exits are,” said Ness.

Jeff went over to a desk by the wall and looked through the hotel information packet. Ness took the key to the room and went out to check the hotel's emergency escape routes.

“So...we're really in Summers, huh?” said Jeff. Glancing over a small pamphlet, he couldn't help but sigh.

“Where is Summers, anyway?” asked Paula. Still lying on her belly in the bed, she propped herself up on her elbows and looked at him.

“It's on the southern tip of the northern continent of Foggyland,” Jeff replied. “Up until recently, I'd been living way up north, in a place called Winters.”

“...Hmmm,” Paula hummed. She sidled up to the bedside table and noticed a short, stout bottle being chilled by the ice inside the metal wine cooler. She pulled it out with a gleeful chirp, and with a pop!, she uncorked it.

“Since we're sort of close by, I wonder if I should try to go back up into the mountains at some point,” Jeff muttered to himself. “I wonder if my father is still in his lab up there. ...Or maybe I can reach him on the phone, from here.”

“Whoa, Jeff, you have a papa~?” said Paula.

“Of course I do,” Jeff replied. “How else do you think I'd be here?”

“What's he like?”

“Well,” Jeff began, “his name is Dr. Andonuts. He's a scientist, and...hey! Hey, Paula!”

“Hm~?” Paula looked up at him with drowsy eyes, and she giggled. She held a tulip-shaped glass in her hand, though it looked like she might drop it at any moment. “...Heeyy, Jeff,” she mumbled. “I can't hear you so well from all the way over there, you should come closer.”

“What did you drink?” Jeff demanded. “Paula...what did you drink?!”

“The stuff from in there,” Paula replied. In one gulp, she drank down what remained of the golden liquid in the bottom of her glass. Then, seeming oblivious to the fact that the hem of her skirt was in real danger of rising just a bit too far, she crawled back over to the wine cooler on all fours and pulled the bottle back out again. “This cider...it's so wonderfully cold, and so delicious...!”

“Dom Pérignon?!” Jeff cried. “...This isn't cider, this is champagne!”

He tried to snatch the glass away, but with a small, sleepy hum, Paula fought him. “Give it back!” she whined.

“That's enough, Paula, no more!” Jeff replied, sternly. “You're going to get alcohol poisoning!”

“No I won't,” Paula insisted. “Just let me have a little more!”

“You can't!”

“Hey, I found out what that guy's been up to! ...Oh, whoa...!” Ness ran into the room to find his two companions struggling with one another. All he could see in that moment was the crumpled bedspread, and then, as it flipped up in all the confusion, Paula's fully exposed, pale, delicate leg! “E-excuse me, didn't mean to interrupt!” he cried. Ness spun around to leave, and in his panic, he crashed into the wall. Staggering, he finally got the door to the next room open and he dashed out. Slam! He shut the door behind him.

“Ness, wait!” cried Jeff. “You don't understan–waugh!” As he tried to chase after Ness, Paula swiftly tackled his ankles!

“...Mooore,” Paula cooed. Her eyes were hazy and out of focus, and she begged the way a spoiled child might. Still clutching the champagne bottle, Jeff suddenly turned bright red.

Meanwhile, in the other room...

Thump-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump...

Ness leaned against the door and clutched at his wildly beating heart. His legs were trembling. All the strength had left his body. He was filled with a terrible misery. A feeling like suddenly realizing one has lost a very precious item through their own carelessness.

If that's how it is, then that's how it is, I guess, but I was first, I was here first, I was always first, but I guess no matter how you look at it, it doesn't really matter whether I was here first or not! A stream of thoughts whirled through Ness's head with such terrible speed that they crashed clumsily into one another. Jeff is great, Jeff's a better guy, Jeff is more dependable and cooler and smarter and taller than me, I'm just some dumb baseball-playing kid who has nothing to offer a girl, but Paula, she's so mature, and probably has so many boyfriends, Paula, the future Miss Eagleland, the adorable and pretty Paula, who is sometimes annoying but so brave, my precious friend who has so much courage and who never gives up...!

An image of Paula's face came into his mind. Together, they had seen so many things, and passed through so many towns... In an instant, every expression she had ever shown–smiles, tears, anger, disappointment, relief, paralyzing fear, a very concerned pout, deep and exhausted sleep–all of them melted into one another and morphed into the face of his mother, who he knew was back in his hometown of Onett, watching over their house while he and his father were away. He could clearly see the cheerful face of his young and very beautiful mama–Rachael, the former Pit Babe–as she laughed. It seemed that every time Ness thought of his mama, er, Rachael, she was always laughing. The kind of laugh where her mouth would open so wide you could see the silver fillings on her back teeth, and she didn't even mind that her pretty face was covered in wrinkles. Her laughter was honest and whole-hearted, as if she didn't have a care in the world.

Ahh, in that way, they're very similar, Ness thought, as he closed his eyes and smiled softly. No matter what they're up against, they never get discouraged, never even flinch. They just believe in themselves and in their own destiny, and then they smile so brightly and get right back up again. You can't beat my mama. And you can't beat Paula, either. She could have decided to let someone protect her, that's what a weaker girl would have done...but she doesn't give up. She always keeps trying. And...I think that's what I love about her...

“Love?” he repeated, out loud. Ness turned red all the way up to his ears. “Is that it? I didn't realize it...but I think I love Pau–”

“Hey, Ness! Ness, what's going on?!” BANGBANGBANGBANG! There was frantic knocking coming from the other side of the door. “Open up, Ness, open the door, now!”

“Oh, uh, sure,” Ness replied.

He opened the door.

“This is ridiculous!” Jeff cried. He stormed out of the room with his shoulders hunched up like a boiled prawn as he panted heavily. He glared at Ness. “I can only imagine what that looked like! But you've got it all wrong. Paula found some alcohol and accidentally got drunk, so I was just trying to take the stuff away from her–and that's all it was!”

“...Oh...?”

Dumbfounded, Ness looked at the champagne bottle Jeff held out to show him, then back at the indignant-looking Jeff...and then he laughed out loud. “Whaaat?” he giggled. “Is that all it was?”

“...Jeeze,” Jeff sighed. He took Ness by the shoulders and led him back into the other room. He gestured with his chin, and there was Paula. She had tossed and turned and rolled around in her drunken state, and now she was wrapped up in the bedspread with only her face peeking out. She was sleeping quite peacefully. “I finally subdued her, and she gave up.”

“That must have been such a pain,” said Ness. “I'm sorry.”

“It's alright,” Jeff began, as he fixed his disheveled bangs and shook his head. “...But what was that you said? Before, I mean. You said you found out what somebody's been up to, or something like that?”

“Oh, right!” Ness cried, as he clapped his hands together. “I got this newspaper from the lobby. Check it out!” He pulled it out of the back pocket of his shorts. “Right here.”

“...Let's see here,” said Jeff, as he quickly adjusted his glasses. “Summers Social Times News Flash... Members of Eagleland's richest family, Aloysius Minch and his son, Pokey, have come to Summers. They spent some time studying at the Scaraba Cultural Museum... They seemed very impressed by the hieroglyphs displayed there... They will be leaving by helicopter this afternoon, and their next destination is the Deep Darkness... What the–! They got away again!”

“Seems like it,” said Ness.

“...This is awful,” Jeff muttered.

The two of them exchanged glances.

“And you can't fix the Sky Runner, right?” Ness asked.

“Right,” Jeff replied. “That would be kind of impossible.”

“Well, then I wonder if we could rent a boat, or something,” said Ness, thoughtfully.

“...A boat?” Jeff repeated. For a moment his face became somewhat dark. But he was a seasoned Warrior after all, and he said nothing beyond what was necessary. “That pamphlet I was reading before did say that there's a port village right next to this town.”

“Oh yeah?” said Ness. “...Alright then, let's go!”

The port village of Toto was also a very hilly village. Because the shoreline was so close to the foot of the mountains, there wasn't much open land available to use. Each and every one of the stucco-coated, blue-roofed houses was pressed up against its nearly identical neighbor, packed eave-to-eave in tight rows. Every street was terribly narrow and often led to either a dead end or a steep set of stairs. There were barrels, buckets and crates stacked up along these pathways which were already so cramped, making it impossible to walk through them in a straight line. Children with dark complexions played tag under clotheslines covered in laundry, stretched from one side of an alley to the other. A very skinny dog ran in circles between their bare legs, barking excitedly.

“You want to rent a boat, huh? Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you.”

“SORRY TO DISAPPOINT!”

Ness and Jeff had found a man in a striped shirt and knit hat down by the mooring posts in the pier, and as he stroked the soft chest feathers of the clever parrot sitting on his shoulder, he gazed off toward the horizon with a heart-broken look on his sunburned face. “I could take you on a sight-seeing tour of the Summers Bay,” the man went on, “but unfortunately, I don't want to risk going out into the open sea. And it's not just me. There isn't a single sailor in Toto who would agree to it. A Kraken has appeared, you see.”

“APPEARED, APPEARED! SCARY! KRAKEN, KRAKEN!” cried the parrot, as it flapped its wings wildly.

“A Kraken?”

“A sea serpent,” the man explained. “And it's basically the size of a living fortress.” He took a sudden swig of liquor from the crumpled brown paper bag he was holding. “Blessedly, I've never actually seen the thing, myself. But it's taken many a ship down to a watery grave. And it's caused all the fish in this area to disappear entirely. Practically all the men of this town have left to find work elsewhere. Most of them have gone to mine for gold in a place called Dusty Dunes, or something like that.”

“GOLD, GO-GO-GO-GOLD, GO-GO-GOLD, GOLD!”

“Mister...uh, Mocci, you can't give up yet!” Jeff cried, very passionately.

“...Hmm,” Ness hummed, as he thought things over for a moment. “Hey, old man?”

“...It's Captain Mone,” the captain replied.

“...Captain Mone,” Ness quickly corrected himself, as he looked straight into the captain's eyes. “If we were to defeat this monster, the people of Toto would be very happy, wouldn't they?”

“Oh of course, very happy!” Captain Mone replied. “But hey, hey now, you kids are so young, you've got to be kidding me! Don't give false hope to a man whose livelihood is on the line.”

“Whether or not we can pull it off in the end, we have to try, don't we?” Ness insisted. “You're a sea captain, aren't you? I'm sure you have a fine ship. If you just give us one quick ride, I'm sure we can–”

“Ohh no, no. No, we can't,” said Captain Mone, as he bowed his head and waved his large hands. “I certainly did have a fine ship, a while back. A beautiful ship known as the Golden Fleece...it's the one on that slipway over there, isn't it great? But then all my friends ran off and I was left all alone, so I fell into a depression. ...I shouldn't have done it, but I ended up going to a social club for a bunch of rich men. While I was there, a man challenged me to a game of cards...and I lost. Plain and simple. He took absolutely everything from me...and now it all belongs to some author named Truman Ahody. Even myself, and even this parrot here. If the master wants to go out in the boat, I have to take the wheel, and Polly the parrot here has to act sociable toward him, too–that's all part of the contract.”

“CONTRACT, CONTRACT!” the parrot cried desperately, as it clacked its giant beak. “POLLY'S UNDER CONTRACT!”

“...Truman,” Ness mumbled. “Why does that sound so familiar... Oh! Wasn't that the name of that weird guy from before?” He fumbled around in the back pocket of his shorts, and there it was–the business card! “If we can get your boat back from that guy, will you give us a ride?”

Captain Mone silently took another swig from the bottle in the paper bag, and his bushy eyebrows raised to the very top of his forehead.

“...Jeff, let's go!” said Ness. “We should be able to find this guy if we go to that Stupidiotic Club, or whatever it was called.”

“...The Stoic Club,” the captain corrected him. “But be careful over there, that's the place where I lost it all in that bet.”

“Thanks for the heads-up...we'll be back soon!” Ness cried, and he ran off at once.

But...

“...That ship,” Jeff muttered. He was looking over at the Golden Fleece in a bit of a daze. It was a sailing ship with three masts. Its white, elegant hull was polished to a shine. Jutting out from the bow was a golden sheep's head–possibly the origin of the ship's name.

Surrounded by all the abandoned fishing ships that had been left with no one to care for them, it looked like a swan soaring among a flock of crows. But on top of all of that, it also very closely resembled a model ship that his brother Jack had put together such a long time ago. A model ship which had been displayed so proudly on a shelf in their half-attic room, in a particular house with a green roof where some stranger was probably living, now...

“Jeff, what's wrong, aren't you coming?!” Ness called, from so far away.

“S-sorry, I'm on my way!” Jeff cried. He bowed 'goodbye' to the captain and ran to catch up with Ness.

“I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!” the parrot shrieked. “FORGIVE ME, FORGIVE ME!”

Right near the border between Summers and Toto, one or two narrow, twisty alleys away from the hustle and bustle of the main seaside road and across a bridge spanning a small waterway, they found the secret club.

It appeared as though it may have been a repurposed old warehouse. It was a terribly cold-looking building covered in rough concrete, with exposed metal beams that had turned red with rust. At the entrance, which was covered by a heavy steel shutter, there was a security camera with a glowing red light. Ness pushed a small button. A condescending voice came over the intercom. “This is a members-only club. You will be denied entry if you do not have a referral.”

“I'm not sure if it's a referral,” said Ness, as he held out that glittering business card. “...But we're here to see this guy.” He turned the card toward the camera.

The camera lens zoomed in on the card intently. “Oh!” cried the voice over the intercom, sounding very surprised. “You're one of master Ahody's guests, are you? I beg your pardon.” Ka-click! The lock was opened remotely.

“Please, come in.”

The shutter lifted with a loud clattering sound. Inside, it was terribly dark. The only light came from blue and lavender lamps that flickered up from the floor. The ambiance was a lot like that of an aquarium.

“Continue straight ahead,” the voice on the intercom guided them. “You will come to an elevator–please step inside it.”

Timidly, Ness and Jeff walked forward. With each step they took, small pictures were suddenly illuminated on the pitch-dark walls. Jellyfish, starfish, an ammonite... These images would reveal themselves rather dimly, then just as suddenly, they'd vanish.

“Infrared rays,” Jeff whispered. “When we pass through them, it acts like a switch.”

A door opened up at the end of the hallway. A small box seemed to carve itself out of all the blackness. The floor was blanketed by a mysterious green glow, but everything else was still in pure darkness. It gave the illusion that the floorboards were floating in mid-air. It was pretty spooky.

“This is like something out of an amusement park!”

“...It's way too elaborate.”

Whispering in small voices, Ness and Jeff got into the elevator with their faces frozen stiff from nerves. The door shut immediately, and with a small lurch, they felt the sensation of sudden movement. The elevator moved so slowly, however, that they couldn't tell if they were going up or going down. Lit from below by that green light, neither Ness nor Jeff could get used to the eerie look of the other's face. Whenever they opened their mouths, the sight of their illuminated teeth in the darkness unsettled them terribly, so they couldn't help but to look away from one another and stand there in silence with their lips gloomily pursed tight.

Finally the elevator stopped and the door opened again.

“Oh!”

Ness's eyes opened wide. They were...on the bottom of the ocean!

The vivid blue of a coral reef...the glittering silver shimmer of all the fish cutting effortlessly through the water like knives...

The area near the floor was narrow and the ceiling spread out wide, so the room was shaped a bit like an upside-down pudding. Through the many glass windows facing in all directions, a silent seascape unfolded all around them. Sunlight glistening down through the waves on the ocean's surface became beautiful paintings of light over the rocks and coral on the sea floor. There were sea anemones, expanding and contracting and swaying...softly, gently, and slowly. There was a clam so large that a diver would be in serious trouble if it clamped onto them, and through the slight gap in its shell they could see a color so blue it was unbelievable. There were two Moorish idol fish drifting serenely along. A teira batfish with stunning vertical stripes. A long cornetfish that looked just like a clarinet. A fish with big googly eyes and blue and white polka-dots on its red lower lip, which was being followed around by a tiny cleaner fish. A huge ray cruising leisurely along behind a distant coral cluster.

“...This is amazing!”

Without even realizing it, Ness and Jeff had pressed their faces against one of the windows. As their eyes darted all around, they noticed a fish somewhat close by, looking right at them with its tiny little fins vibrating rapidly. It was a fashionable little fellow, with black polka-dots on its yellow, strangely square-shaped body. ...A baby pufferfish! It hovered in place and stared fixedly at Ness. It looked as though it wanted to pick a fight.

“Awww, it's so cute!” Ness cried, with a joyful smile. But just then...

“Ahh, so you came!” said a voice from behind him, as someone put a hand on his shoulder. He didn't even have to turn around to know it was Truman Ahody. Images of the drifting fish were reflected in his sunglasses, which were sharply pointed at the tips and looked a bit like something an old lady would wear. Suddenly remembering the reason they had come, Ness's expression changed entirely.

“We came to ask you for a favor,” he said. “We were talking with that Captain Mone guy, and we need you to give him back his–”

“Sure, sure,” Truman interrupted. “Anyway, have a seat, please.”

Truman held Ness around his shoulders far tighter than was necessary and led him to a couch facing the window. It was way too soft, and Ness sank almost completely into it. There was a kidney-shaped table topped with a number of books and a glass of water, apparently for Truman. Keeping Ness in between the two of them, Jeff sat as far away from Truman as possible.

“What would you like to drink?” asked Truman, as he snapped his fingers. A tall black man appeared, wearing cultural garments unfamiliar to Ness and holding a menu.

“...They only have water here?” said Ness, his eyes open wide in disbelief.

Truman's pale lips curled into a sneer. “A snob, huh?” he replied. “Well, which will it be?”

“We don't really have time for this,” Ness replied, as he took off his hat and clutched it tightly. “We need to head south. Please, lend us that boat!”

“We plan to defeat that Kraken along the way,” added Jeff. “If we manage to do it, both Summers and Toto will flourish again.”

“We're not playing around,” Ness went on. “And this isn't just some random ambition of ours, either. The truth is...as crazy as it might sound, we're on a journey to save the world from a crisis.”

“There must be some misunderstanding, beau garçon,” Truman replied, as he templed his fingertips and touched them to his nose. “I have no interest in justice, or in whether or not a town flourishes. What I am interested in is beauty, and the senses. That is what it means to be an artist. It is found not in peace but in war, not in success but in failure, not in completion but in frustration, and not in creation but in destruction. ...Look around you, at all the guests here.”

Truman gestured throughout the establishment, and Ness and Jeff looked around. There were many very elegant, refined, and rich-looking people with perfect tans, outfits, and hairstyles, sitting in scattered chairs and staring out through the windows at the fish, although it seemed they weren't truly seeing them at all. On each table, there were glasses or bottles of mineral water, but they had hardly been touched. Everyone was silent and held perfectly still. Their lifeless and expressionless faces reflected an eerie blue light from the wavering sea water. They reminded Ness of all those zombies he had seen in Threed. Sure, the people here were tidier, and a little nicer to look at, but...

“That man there is a high official in his homeland,” said Truman. “And that man is supposed to be royalty from a certain other country. Oh, and over there–that's the famous actress, Marimari, isn't it? I wonder when she got here.” Standing transfixed in the very center of the room was, in fact, the woman staying in the suite next to theirs at L'hotel du Summers. “Every person here is absurdly rich, and has accomplished enviable feats in their lives. But, what do you think? Do you think they look happy?”

“...............”

Ness and Jeff looked at one another, then they looked back at Truman and shook their heads slowly.

“No?” said Truman. “Well, you mustn't misread them. They are all just as happy as anyone could possibly be. They are not beautiful, and they are not sensual, or in other words, they have no appeal whatsoever. And that is exactly why they are able to be happy. That's an example of tautology, isn't it? The reason they are so happy is because here, they can become anonymous–nobody at all, an unremarkable, uninteresting, basic human being. So long as a star is a star, they are forced to shine. They could never allow such vulnerable faces as these to be seen anywhere but here, in their sanctuary. The sanctuary they have reclaimed.”

“Their Sanctuary...?” Ness gasped. “I have my own Sanctuaries, too!”

“Oh?” Truman replied.

“There are eight of them out there in the world,” Ness explained. “I have to find them, all of them, and fight to take them back under my control.”

Truman's somewhat clouded expression changed only very slightly to one of curiosity. “...And if you do take these places back,” he asked, “what happens then?”

“...I don't know,” Ness replied, honestly. “But, I have to do it. I made a promise. To Buzz Buzz...a rhinoceros beetle who came back in time from the future, and...” Ness paused to chew his nails, and his legs trembled in frustration. “...And we have to do something about Pokey!”

“Old man,” Jeff cut in impatiently. “If I'm understanding correctly, you won that ship in a wager with Captain Mone. So then, how would you like to make a wager with us?”

“Jeff?!” Ness cried, incredulously.

“O-ho!” Truman replied in a mocking tone, as he looked Jeff over. “Feeling confident, are we?”

“Card games tend to be based in probability and statistics,” said Jeff, as he glared back at Truman and stood his ground. “...So any kind of cheating can be detected right away.”

“Hmph, so maybe not cards, then,” Truman growled. “...Well, what will you wager? It would have to be worth at least as much as the ship, you know.”

“My life,” Jeff replied. He continued to glare at Truman, and he spoke without the slightest hesitation.

“Jeff!” Ness gasped, in a panic. “You can't do something like that!”

“It'll be alright,” Jeff replied, without even looking at Ness.

“Your life, eh?” Truman chuckled. He crossed his arms, and his lips curled into a bitter smile as he thought for a moment. Then, finally, he stood up and called for the black man again. He gestured with his hands, then leaned in to whisper something into the man's ear. The black man's eyes grew wide for a moment, but when Truman added something more insistent, he nodded silently, then rushed off somewhere in a hurry.

“Jeff, why would you say something like that?!” cried Ness, as he grabbed Jeff by his collar and shook him. “I already know you're brave, you don't have to prove it to me like this!”

“That's not what this is about.”

Jeff finally looked up, and Ness was startled by the extremely serious expression on his face. “We have to fight, and we have to win. As it is now, I'm sure I wouldn't be able to get on that boat anyway.”

“What do you mean?” said Ness. “Why not...?”

“...Because I'm scared,” Jeff replied. A pained smile appeared on his face. “And I have to convince myself I'm good for something, Ness!”

The black man returned. He was holding a tray, on top of which there were six small glasses, each containing what looked like pure, clear water.

“I'm sure you've heard of Russian roulette,” Truman said, removing his sunglasses. His eyes were terribly pale, and it was hard to be sure exactly where he was looking. “In any one of these glasses, there is a dissolved necrotoxin–a fast-acting poison. There is no antidote. We will each drink a glass in turn. If you are afraid, you do not have to take the next drink. But, the moment you refuse to drink, you lose, and of course, if one of us dies, the dead one has lost, as well.”

“You would risk your life, too...?” Jeff cried, his eyes open wide in surprise.

“That's what the world's come to, I suppose,” replied Truman. “I've grown tired of plain water, anyway. ...So, what do you say?”

“I accept,” said Jeff. He reached out and took the glass closest to him. He gazed through the clear water and could see a hazy, distorted image of Truman's intense expression. The sunlight filtering down through the seawater flickered and glittered, and to Ness, everything began to look like some kind of strange and beautiful dream.

Have you ever experienced something like that? A moment when, suddenly, everything feels like an illusion. An instant where the past and the present no longer line up as they should. You can't quite put your finger on what is off, exactly, but something just isn't right. It feels like suddenly realizing you've been left all alone in a scene that no longer seems real. Ness furrowed his brow.

A simple, peaceful smile appeared on Jeff's face as he raised the glass up high.

“To Jack,” he said.

“Who's Jack?!” Ness cried, but leaving himself no time to answer, Jeff downed the water from the glass in one gulp. And then, almost immediately, his eyes opened wide, and as he looked over at Ness, he pitched forward and collapsed.

“JEEEEEEEEEEEFF!”

Just outside the window, one of the small bubbles tumbling up from the seafloor rose through the many layers of the ocean, soared across the sky, and floated up through distant, rose-colored clouds.

This hardly-visible bubble was swallowed in just one breath.

Startled, a boy opened his eyes. These eyes were bright and almond-shaped, with an epicanthal fold. The boy had cheeks as smooth as a porcelain doll's, a compact little nose, and tightly pursed lips. His jet-black hair was tied tightly at the very top of his head and draped down his back in a long braid.

He crossed his arms over his chest and he curved and bent the fingers on each hand into complicated shapes, performing mudras. Suddenly, he flung his arms out wide, and his body gently began to descend. That's right–this boy had just been floating in mid-air! With his right leg still held in the Lotus position, he extended the tips of the toes on his left foot toward the ground. Soundlessly, he alighted on the floor.

The boy was wearing a neutral-colored shirt with a tight collar, and matching pants. On his feet, he wore shoes made out of cloth.

He walked with great strides down a long, stone hallway. He passed through a door shaped like a keyhole which was carved straight into the wall, and entered a spacious hall filled with trails of smoke from burning incense. This hall was also hewn roughly from stone. One square segment of the floor was raised above the rest, and this platform was enclosed by a vermilion-lacquered railing. There were two thrones on the platform, standing side by side. An old man with white hair and a white beard, holding a khakkara, sat in the throne to the left. Two men in glittering green robes, with mustaches shaped like upside-down V's, stood to the left and right of the old man.

“...The time has finally come, hasn't it?” asked the old man in a raspy voice, as the boy shut his eyes in silence. An affirmation. “The world below is very different from Dalaam,” the old man went on. “There are all sorts of impurities there. I beg you, be cautious.”

The boy turned to leave.

“Prince Poo,” the old man called, with one hand raised hesitantly. “You will be returning to us...won't you?”

The boy looked back over his shoulder at the old man, and he smiled gently.

“Yee-soo-chi,” he began, in a low voice. “You really are getting old, aren't you?”

“You liar!” Ness hollered. “You horrible cheater! You had poison put into all the glasses!”

Jeff had gone as wide-eyed and stiff as a doll, and Ness held him in his arms.

“I...I-I didn't tell a lie!” Truman shouted back. “I said any one of the glasses may contain the poison. I didn't say only one of the glasses! I also didn't say the rest of the glasses contained pure water. Nothing comes from my lips but the truth. ...Or my name isn't Truman!”

Even the club's dazed and apathetic guests came to their senses at the sound of all the commotion, and they gathered around, chattering noisily. Some looked reproachfully at Truman, while others whispered to one another. When that beautiful actress heard what had happened from the man standing next to her, a terrible “Oh!” escaped her alluring lips, and she suddenly fainted.

“But, you all saw it, didn't you?” Truman bellowed. “He was the one who challenged me to a bet in the first place! I didn't force him to drink anything! And at the very least, he should have been smart enough to try to get me to take a drink, first! I...I didn't do anything wrong!”

“Jeff...Jeff, hang in there!” Ness cried, as he lightly slapped Jeff's cheeks. But there was no response. “I can't believe you're gone, just like that, in a place like this...over something so stupid!”

Ness tightly clenched his fist and bit his own hand. Then he suddenly began to concentrate. He suppressed his panic, and he called to mind the image of a bright, white light. He put both of his hands over Jeff's heart, and...PSI HEALING! Ness's hands gave off a blinding glow. The club's guests all watched with wide eyes, and they cried out in surprise. Ness gave it all the strength he had...but Jeff's eyes remained like glass. They saw nothing at all.

It's hopeless...ohh, I'm so useless! Ness lamented, silently. Then, suddenly, he gasped. Paula. He'd completely forgotten about Paula! She was far better at using PSI than he was!

He tried to call out to her using telepathy, but he was in too much of a panic and was still exhausted by that PSI burst he had just unleashed, so he couldn't focus his mind properly. It was frustrating, but he'd have to ask for help.

“Excuse me,” he said, hastily. “May I borrow a phone?!”

“Here you are,” said the black man, as he came forward carrying a telephone on top of a cushion.

“Thank you!” Ness cried. He hurriedly attempted to dial, then realized he didn't remember the hotel's phone number. “I'm so sorry to ask more of you,” he implored, “but do you think you can dial L'hotel du Summers for me? I need to get through to the Hercules Suite, I want to speak to a girl there named Paula.”

“Of course,” the black man replied. With his long, elegant fingers, he began to dial the phone with a beep-boop-bing. “But, although it may be a bit too late to say so, sir...I did not put any poison into that glass.”

“Huh?!”

“What did you just say?!”

...Ness and Truman cried, at the same time.

The black man, whose skin was as glossy as a well-worn piano, smiled faintly as he craned his long neck.

“No matter how often our members request it, we will not serve poisoned water here at the Stoic Club. ...Ah, allô, the 'Ercules Suite, s'il vous plaît?”

“W-well then,” Ness muttered, “what's wrong with Jeff...?”

The power of suggestion, he thought. And a word, which was new and a bit complicated for Ness, suddenly appeared in his mind. Oh, it's the spasibo effect!

Sure, he had gotten the word a little wrong, but he remembered what Jeff had described a while back–the idea that if a person truly believes in it, even ordinary water can become medicine.

Oh, could it be...?! thought Ness. Was it possible that in this desperate situation, Jeff's unconscious mind was sending out messages through telepathy, something he wouldn't normally be able to do? If so, then...

Ness summoned all of his mental energy, and he focused it toward Jeff's mind. Jeff, Jeff, speak to me! You can't go alone, please let me come with you...!

Jeff's face was still so terribly clever and fair, and his eyes so bright and blue behind those glasses. Ness stared intently at his motionless friend. He tried to envision himself steadily leaving his own body, but he felt so tightly bound to it, like an object attached to its shadow. He couldn't shake himself free.

But you can separate yourself from your shadow, Ness thought. You just need to jump! And so, he tried to “jump” with his mind. He felt the tension between his body and his mind pulling taut. A little more...a little more...that's it, yes! Like a thread pulled to its limit, there was a snap!, and he was finally free!

“Aah!”

“Yaaiiiee!”

With a soft thud, Ness collapsed right on top of Jeff.

“What the...?”

“What's going on?”

“It happened to this kid, too! He's stiff as a board!”

The guests all began to raise a fuss. Meanwhile...

“Allô? Is this the 'Ercules Suite?” said the black man, calmly, into the phone's receiver. “Je suis Monsieur Noir. I am the manager of an establishment known as the Stoic Club. Mademoiselle, if you know two garçon by the names of Ness and Jeff, would you please come here, right away?”

“...Orphée, Hoffmann...Dante's Divine Comedy,” Truman mumbled to himself, as he trembled. “Have those two found themselves in the kingdom of hell? ...Oh, damnation, how wonderful, how wonderful! I'm absolutely envious! I'd love to see it, if only I could!”

“Oh, someday you will,” someone whispered spitefully, and Truman's eyes opened wide with terror.

A rugged mountain range... Lingering mists... Looking down over a sea of pink clouds, Prince Poo was meditating. At the peak of a steep mountain littered with white rocks that looked like scattered bones, in a space that seemed too small to stand even a single boiled egg...there, half-floating, sat the prince.

In the depths behind his half-opened eyes, he saw a fetus curled up inside a ray of light. Within each of its cells, he could see the pulsing, the circulation, and the vibrations of the flow of life. In one single drop of water from a glittering river, he could see the newborn cosmos. He saw the vacuum of the Milky Way, a spiraling nebula, the silent explosion of a nova star. The surface of this star became heated and agitated, torrents of rain fell from newly formed clouds, vegetation burst forth with incredible vigor, seeds fell and sprouted, leaves and tendrils rushed forth and bore a flower...and within its slowly unfurling petals sat the Buddha, alone and tranquil, one hand held aloft and the other at his knee. With a dazzling flash of light, the Buddha opened his eyes, and every conceivable form of life was brought into existence, from simple protoplasm to cosmic lifeforms drifting through interstellar space on solar winds. From ancient times to the very ends of the distant future.

Ohn-dyu-bi-sha-ba-dyu-bi-sha-ba-da-sha-ba-dyu-bi-dyu-ba-ah-deu-wa-ah, nan-ta-ra-kan-ta-ra-un-ta-ra-na-ah-kan-man...

“What, oh what have you two done now?!” Paula cried. Having just rushed over to the Stoic Club, her face was red with anger. “It's awful, isn't it? Isn't it unfair?! This is what happens when you leave me behind and run off without saying anything!”

Ness and Jeff were lying side by side. They looked just like wax dummies.

“...Oh, you have to be kidding me!” Paula went on. “I don't know if this is just 'fellowship between men', or what, but...it feels pretty sexist, to me!” With tears streaming down her face, Paula sat beside the two of them.

“Lord...please, I have to help them... Take me to where they are...!”

In a place that was nowhere, and in a time that never was...

All I know is...I've been here before, Ness thought.

I don't know exactly when, or how many times, but... Oh, maybe it was before I was even born...

Ness gently bounded forward.

Jeff, where are you? he thought. Where did you go?

Glittering stardust morphed into the shape of a huge peony flower. Bang! It was a firework. More burst open, one after another. There was the scent of sea salt. The sound of waves. Something like white lace, drifting forward and then pulling back again.

The ocean? The shore? ...No, a harbor?

A huge crowd of people were gathered on the pier of a marina, and a lively party was underway. Little by little, Ness began to hear the live performance of a big band.

Aha, he thought. ...I found you!

There, at the very top of the main mast of a beautiful, white sailing ship that looked a lot like Captain Mone's, was Jeff. He was all alone. There was something wrapped around his neck. It was a rope. A thick, coarse, twine rope–the kind used to tie down ships.

“Jeff!”

Ness leapt out and approached him. When Jeff noticed him there, a lonely smile crept onto his face.

“I came back,” he said. “I came back to this place, again.” His voice sounded so young–like a child only four, maybe five years old. “I...I have to start all over, from here.”

“Alright,” Ness replied, a bit puzzled. “But we have to get this rope off of you first!” Floating there in midair, he took Jeff's hand. “Something feels very wrong, here...”

“You can't take it off,” said Jeff, as he shook his head. “I'll have to wear this for the rest of my life.”

“But you said you have to start all over again, didn't you?” Ness replied. “So then, you don't need something like this any more!” With that, Ness tried to take hold of the rope.

“Don't touch it!” Jeff cried.

“Whoa!”

Jeff's outburst sent Ness flying back thirty feet or so. Jeff was crying. Tears streaked down his reddened cheeks. “Please don't touch it! This is...our bond... Mine, and Jack's. An unbreakable bond, for all eternity...!”

“But I'm here, now.”

Suddenly, a calm, gentle voice came from somewhere high above.

“...Jack?” said Jeff, seeming bewildered. “Is it really you? Is it really you, Jack? Oh, come closer! Please, let me see you!”

Solemn music echoed throughout. Ness looked around, and suddenly they were surrounded by flowers, which spread as far as the eye could see. They were somewhere warm, and they were surrounded by rose-colored clouds. A gentle downpour of golden rain began to fall just as a robed young boy with wide, pure-white wings descended gently and peacefully from above.

Jeff's arms were limp at his sides, and his mouth hung open in shock. Slowly, so slowly, like great, airy snowflakes as they fall to the ground, the angel–oh, for if this could not be called an angel, then what could?–alighted beside Jeff, and softly held his cheeks in his hands.

“I came to take this away,” the angel's voice rang out. “You don't need it anymore.”

Gently, the rope around Jeff's slender neck began to float upwards. Bathed in white, blinding light, it rose over his chin, his ears, and then his forehead. Like an impossibly beautiful necklace, then a gorgeous crown...

Jeff was still and silent as tears welled up beneath his long and lovely eyelashes, then they began to spill over and run down his cheeks.

As Ness looked on, suddenly his own throat felt tight. Flustered, he tucked in his chin and pulled the brim of his hat down over his face.

“...Oh, finally!” came an exasperated voice. “I found you two at last! What are you doing in a place like this?”

“Paula?!” cried the very puzzled Ness, as she suddenly materialized, a bright rainbow trailing behind her. “Huh? Who's this guy?”

At Paula's side, there was yet another young boy that Ness did not know.

“This is Prince Poo,” Paula replied. “He's from Dalaam, in Chommo.” As Paula introduced him, Prince Poo's upturned eyes shone cheerfully, and he bowed very slightly. “He's another friend we've been waiting for–and the final one!”

“...Jeff,” the angel went on, as he held the rope above his own head. There, it became a golden halo. The wings, the rope, and that familiar face...with a divine brilliance, they all began to fade away. “I'm here. I'm by your side. Always, no matter what, and no matter where you go.”

“Jack...Jack!” Jeff cried, as he came to his senses.

“Big...brother!”

Blink-blink!

Jeff's eyelids fluttered a few times. Then, flustered, he sat up and looked around.

A large group of strangers stared down at him with very concerned faces, then they all gasped at once. They began to clap. ...This was apparently the Stoic Club.

“...Wh-what just happened to me?” Jeff mumbled. “Where was I just now...?” He got to his feet, and he was surprised to see Ness lying beside him–unconscious, but with his eyes wide open. “H...hey, Ness!” he cried.

“...Mmmnn...oh, you came back!” Ness replied in a cheerful voice, and he sat up with a jolt. He raised both legs into the air and then flipped onto his feet. He looked just like a gymnast nailing their landing.

At his side, Paula had been very still, kneeling with her head down in a position of prayer. Warmth began to return to her cheeks, and so did the lively glint that always shone in her eyes. Like a dog who had just come back from a swim, Paula wildly shook out her golden curls.

“Alright then, boys!” she began in a stern voice, as she put her hands on her hips. “I hope you've both learned your lesson, and won't ever leave me behind again!”

“...We won't.”

“Hmph, it's like she doesn't even realize why we had to leave her behind...”

...The two boys grumbled, as their faces turned red.

“Well, let's go!” Paula went on. “Somewhere nearby, I'm sure we'll meet Poo in person very soon. I had a premonition that it would be in a place where very old, very rare things have been gathered together... And some kind of stone...there seemed to be something like a large stone there, too.”

“A museum!” Ness cried. “Now that you mention it, Pokey apparently dropped by there, too.”

“The hieroglyphs!” added Jeff. “We should go there, right away!”

The three of them put their arms around each other's shoulders and headed excitedly for the exit.

“Oh, but...who is Poo?” Jeff asked, suddenly remembering what Paula had said. Apparently he had been so distracted by his encounter with Angel Jack that he hadn't seen them all together.

“I have a strange feeling we'll be introducing him to you soon,” Paula replied. “...Oh?”

Truman was standing in front of the elevator.

“What is it?” asked Ness. “What do you want, now?” He continued forward, cautiously.

With a timid smile, Truman pulled something from the front pocket of his Hawaiian shirt–a folded piece of paper with the word “Contract” written on it. It appeared to be the one Captain Mone had been forced to write up when he lost their bet. Truman tore it into tiny little pieces.

“I lost to the three of you,” he said. “Can you ever forgive my arrogance?”

Truman held out his hand nervously. After a moment of hesitation, Ness gripped it firmly and shook it. Then Jeff did the same, and then Paula.

“Thank goodness,” Truman sighed, and he shook his head with what appeared to be relief. “You see, I...I became rich and famous and developed a fine reputation while I was still very young. I ended up being declared a celebrity. I was considered a genius, widely known for my talents and also just for being a popular figure in general. I live in a house the size of a castle, and I can go sight-seeing all across the world whenever I wish, on jet planes and cruise ships. I spend all my days doing nothing but partying with beautiful men and women. But...before I even realized it had happened, an emptiness came to haunt the depths of my heart, and it could not be tamed...”

Truman suddenly raised his head, and he looked all around the club. Man and woman, young and old...every last soul in that secret club was standing perfectly still with their eyes fixed on Truman. They were leaning in to hear everything he had to say. One had a very sour expression on his face, another wrung her hands together and seemed rather uncomfortable, and yet another appeared to be on the verge of tears. Every one of them was focused on Truman's confession, as if this were not clearly someone else's business.

“All of you...you know what I mean, don't you?” Truman asked them.

An oil baron who had only recently struck his fortune, a large-scale agricultural tycoon, and a rock star all nodded. A famous basketball player, the world's current skiing champion, and a successful movie director all wiped tears from the corners of their eyes. With a calm and knowing expression, the manager, Mr. Noir, kept his gaze on the floor.

As the crowd remained silent, that terribly attractive actress stepped forward, and she hugged Truman around his somewhat small shoulders in a very gentle, very solemn way. There was nothing romantic about the gesture–it was more like she was comforting a fellow wounded soldier.

At first Truman seemed surprised by her actions, but then, very joyfully, he hugged her back and gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“Everything was pointless, everything was bothersome, and everything was revolting to me,” he went on. “...I was tired of life. I didn't want there to be a tomorrow. I didn't think I cared if there were wars going on in other countries, or about the inevitable downfall of mankind, or the idea that the whole world might someday disappear entirely...because I had already done everything I was supposed to have done, and I was bored!

“But... Oh, but...

“Now I remember them...all the little children out there in the world. Honest, pure, and incredible young people, able to stand up against any hardship for the sake of their beloved friends.

“Fine art does not equal decadence. Literature, music, and athletics are not merely tools of success. Even if you are commended for your clever knowledge or your distinctive techniques, and even if the experts sing your praises, it won't do you any real good! The miracle that is creation once belonged exclusively to the gods...and the power to create is still a miracle of its own! And no matter how small a miracle it may be, I have to continue to cherish this power, this little magic that was bestowed upon me by some mysterious destiny, and I must use it to bring about something wonderful.

“I think I want to try writing adventure stories, the kind that thrill the heart. Stories of brave young boys and girls armed with steadfast hearts, the willingness to risk it all, and deep friendships as they battle despair, hopelessness, and an evil that threatens to devour the world. ...I will write my stories keeping children all over the world in mind...I will write stories for all those children. It is my hope that these stories will entertain and even encourage young people. That's what I want to do. That's what I have to do! When I think about it this way, I realize...I can't die yet. ...I know I have to do my best...and keep living!”

In an instant, the once-silent club was filled with the sounds of warm laughter, applause, and cheers. The guests all ran to Truman, and they joyfully expressed their affection for him.

“Thank you, Ness, Jeff, and Paula,” he said. “I will never forget you.”

Truman's eyes suddenly seemed to be full of so much more life than they had been before.

The three of them ran straight to the port village of Toto, bringing the happy news. The overjoyed Captain Mone began putting all his effort into the maintenance of his newly reclaimed Golden Fleece. But, needless to say, preparing a ship of that size takes quite a bit of time. So while they waited, the three of them decided to check out the famous Scaraba Cultural Museum.

They took the optional tour bus from the hotel and headed north into the mountains. Before long, the archaeological site came into view in the distance. The entire hillside was a blueish-gray color.

They arrived at the temple of an ancient empire, which had been built from small stones that had been carefully stacked on top of one another, and was as large as a fortress. Although there were some areas that had crumbled and been overtaken by vegetation, it still seemed inhabitable enough. Beneath the intense rays of the mid-summer sun, they followed their guide's flag as they were led on a group tour through the area. Great pillars towered above their heads, and the large main staircase was flanked by a dozen small sphinx statues, six on either side. There was a watchtower, an armory, and housing for soldiers. There were passageways with strange and complicated twists and turns, possibly meant to help obstruct an enemy's charge. There were also pitfall-style traps. Quite a number of massive stones were stacked up to the ceiling in one dead-end section. After going up and down many flights of stairs, they arrived at a surprisingly small bedchamber meant for a king. And in a perfect circle all around it were the bedrooms of his first through his sixteenth wives.

“It's almost as if he was using his wives as a shield!” Paula grumbled furiously.

“This place looks like some kind of dungeon,” said Ness.

“We could play out a whole RPG in here, couldn't we?” said Jeff.

Unfortunately, because the excavation of the ruins was still incomplete, the really interesting parts, like the tombs of the royal family and the temple itself, could only be looked at through wire netting, as entry into those areas was prohibited.

Because the grounds were so vast and confusing, their tour guide would often take a headcount of her group to make sure no one had gotten lost. When they came back up from the underground tombs and were out under the blue sky once again, she stopped to take another count.

“One, two, three,” she counted. “...Oh, isn't that strange? We somehow seem to have...added someone to our group...?!” The tour guide looked puzzled. “Did someone maybe...get mixed up with us, from another tour? You're all from the L'hotel du Summers group, right?”

Confused, the tour group looked around at one another. Then they all nodded in unison.

The guide bit her lip. They had just come up out of a tomb, of all places...! She seemed a little frightened, but she collected herself and said, “Well, let's be off, then!” Holding that flag bearing the hotel's logo up high, she spun around and set off. “...It's fine,” she muttered to herself. “I don't know how it happened! But, as long as we're not missing anyone...then I'm not in any trouble!”

“...Poo,” Paula sighed at the small boy who was suddenly walking beside her. “That poor woman's going to have nightmares, now.”

“Do you really think so?” he replied. There was a look of puzzlement in the upturned eyes of Prince Poo of Dalaam. “But...once everything settles down, she'll be fine, I'm sure.”

“She could add it to her tour script,” Jeff chuckled. “Something like...'Once, our group emerged from these very tombs with one guest more than we had when we went in... Everyone, look at the person standing beside you...is it someone you recognize?' ...It adds some spooky flair, don't you think?”

“I guess so...”

“I read about something like that in a picture book, once,” said Ness. “In some cultures, when a child suddenly appears and no one knows where they came from, they're considered to be something like a god. They say that if you don't make a fuss about it, act casually, and treat them with care, they'll bring happiness to your home and your family.”

“Well, that's me then, isn't it?” said Poo, his expression completely unchanging. “I am a Kumari, after all.”

“What's a Kumari?”

“A god which resides within the body of a human being,” Poo replied. “In our kingdom, Kumari are inherited through the generations. Usually it is a young girl who carries a Kumari, and for only two or three years of her life. But in the six-hundred-sixty-sixth generation, it had been foretold that the Prince of Time would inherit the Kumari in order to do battle with the King of Demons. ...This is a legend that has been passed down in Dalaam for two thousand years. And I am of the six-hundred-sixty-sixth generation.”

“What happened to all the girls who carried the Kumari before you?” asked Paula. “Don't tell me they became human sacrifices!”

“Of course not!” cried Poo, as he glared at Paula. “Why would we do something so barbaric? ...After the deity leaves them, they live out their lives just the way any other woman would. Eventually they marry, and they have children. In our kingdom, there are former gods, husbands of former gods, children of former gods...and so on, and so on.”

“Whoa, how exotic!”

They continued to chat as they walked, until at last they came to the final stop on the tour–the museum.

In the first exhibit room, there were rows of things like statues and pottery that had been excavated from the temple. There were figures of people with the heads of dogs, cats, and frogs. What little remained of the paint was a beautiful shade of blue, just like the sky above Summers. There were also wonderfully crafted vases and jars and other items which had once adorned the tombs.

In the second room there was an exhibit of decorations. Gold and silver beads... Emeralds and rubies... Time-worn and battered ceremonial clothing... And in one corner of a showcase full of accessories, Ness saw an incense burner shaped somewhat like a rhinoceros beetle.

“Wow...this looks just like Buzz Buzz!” he cried.

“That's a Scaraba,” said the tour guide, noticing Ness's sudden fixation. Without a second's delay, she began to explain it to him in detail. “It's a species of beetle that is now extinct. They say that when the weather became cold it was able to bury itself in the ground to hibernate, and then the next year it would come flying back out again. It was considered to be a symbol of death and resurrection, and to the ancient people of Summers, the Scaraba was a sacred creature. We have recovered all sorts of ancient jewelry in the shape of the Scaraba.”

“Hmm,” Ness hummed to himself, thoughtfully.

According to an informative pamphlet, the exhibit showing off that mysterious stone slab with the hieroglyphs was up the stairs in the back of the museum. However, stretched right across those stairs was a rope, and on that rope hung a sign that read, “Authorized Personnel Only Beyond This Point”.

“Huh, why?!”

“That's strange...”

“What was the point in coming here if we can't see the hieroglyphs?!”

“Now then,” said the tour guide. “I'll show you all to the lunch room! Everyone, follow me!”

The four of them stood stubbornly at the bottom of the staircase and refused to move, but the rest of the tour group resigned far more easily. They lined up behind the tour guide with her flag and quickly made their exit. The cafeteria's grilled chicken was apparently far more appealing to them than some old hieroglyphs.

“Sirs, madam, this way, please,” said the curator of the museum, when he noticed the four children had been left behind.

“We wanted to see the hieroglyphs.”

“...Oh, no, I'm very sorry,” the curator replied with a frown. “The truth is, someone recently tampered with that exhibit. We are currently trying our hardest to restore it as quickly as possible.”

“Tampered with it...?” Ness muttered, as he furrowed his brows. There was nothing wrong with the exhibit when Pokey came to see it. So that must mean...oh no...

“We won't get in the way of your work,” said Jeff. “We'll be fast...just one quick look! Please...”

“It's the whole reason we took this tour!” Paula pleaded.

“Is that so...?” said the curator, thoughtfully. “Well, please wait here a moment. I'll see what I can do.” He picked up the museum's telephone. Yes, a group of children. They're very adamant. They seem to have quite a healthy appetite for learning. They've apparently been looking forward to it very much. They're begging very desperately. “...Oh, you're in luck!” the curator cried, as he hung up the phone. “They've given you very special permission. Well then, please, follow me!”

At the top of the stairs there was a small room. Blue protective sheets had been laid down, and scaffolding had been set up. The hieroglyphs in question were carved into a very crude hunk of rock that reached almost to the ceiling and was shaped a bit like a crouching monkey. Two men in helmets and heavy-duty work gear looked over a blueprint while discussing something or other between themselves.

“I'm very sorry, I apologize for the mess,” said the curator, as he bowed deeply toward the four children. “Well, please, have a look!”

The four of them stepped forward, being careful not to trip on any of the tools and lumber that were scattered about.

“Like the famous Rosetta Stone,” the curator explained, “these hieroglyphs are said to be the key to deciphering ancient scripts, and they are considered to be of incredible value to all mankind.”

The surface of the stone was covered with finely carved symbols. These symbols seemed to be divided into three separate blocks. At the bottom were symbols that were strangely cute-looking, made of circles and triangles and squiggly lines. Above those were characters made from sharp notches pointing up, down, left, right, and every possible direction in between. And at the top there were very pictorial symbols. Things like the Scaraba and the dog and cat heads they had seen in the previous exhibits were scattered among them here and there.

...And above those pictorial symbols was very childish-looking graffiti, scrawled in what looked like Magic Marker ink. There was a drawing of a person with a very round face and a pig's snout, and another person with a little upside-down V for a mustache, both riding in a helicopter and saying, “Whee!” ...And there were four other people, one with glasses, one with a ribbon, one with a baseball cap, and one with a tight braid at the very top of his head, stomping their feet in frustration.

“Hmm...what's this...?” muttered the kindly curator, as he compared this drawing to the four children standing before him. “W-what the? That looks just like...”

“'The devil's fire pours down upon the mountains and sinks into a sea of binary stars,'” Poo read aloud in a grave voice. His eyes, which were narrow even under normal circumstances, were as fine as threads as he glared at the stone. “'After much time has passed, it comes from the heavens, embracing a wicked mind...'”

The curator was stunned. “Y-you...you can read it?” he stammered.

“'Generations of royalty and heroes gather in great numbers, and the people build a pyramid fortress in order to combat this threat. After years of fighting, by the grace of the gods, the almighty fool Giygas is defeated at last and is banished to the ends of time. Joyful song returns to the earth. However, the predictions of scholars and soothsayers warn that it has since established its evil lair beyond space and time, as never was it fully destroyed. It lies still in a rift in time within the Deep Darkness, trailing shadow through the generations. After a thousand years have passed, its evil intent will be resurrected, and the golden brilliance of the Mani Mani will lead the people astray and drown them in captivating greed. Four of our descendants, young and brave, must rise, and they must destroy this threat. They must uphold our ageless and sacred protection of this sky, this earth, this sea'...”

“So in other words,” Jeff began, “a thousand years ago, the ancient people built a pyramid in order to fight off Giygas the first time. But, it also says that he's supposed to come back someday. And so far, that prediction about the golden Mani Mani statue making people greedy has been spot-on.”

“And it's made its lair...in a place 'beyond space and time'?” added Paula. “So I guess that's where we have to attack it, right?”

“And that rift in time...this says it's in the 'Deep Darkness'!” said Ness. “Oh, we have to hurry! Pokey headed off toward the Deep Darkness a while ago!”

“Yeah!”

“We gotta run!”

“Oh, hey, wait, please wait a minute!” cried the curator, as he chased after them with a notebook in one hand. “Can you repeat that for me? Please read through it one more time, I haven't written it all down, yet!”

“DEPARTURE TIME, OFF WE GO!”

On Polly the Parrot's enthusiastic signal, the mooring rope was untied and the ship's sails caught the breeze. Gripping the wheel tightly, Captain Mone was filled with a sudden and powerful thrill. The four children came out onto the deck, and the crowd of people on the wharf who had come to see them off threw flowers and streamers.

Among them were Mr. Noir, the calm and collected manager of the Stoic Club, and the gorgeous actress Marimari, with Truman, apparently a very good friend of hers, at her side. They also spotted many of the other guests they had seen at the club, as well as some of the children of the port village, various onlookers, and a good number of couples who, as always, had no interest in anything but one another. The gathered crowd waved their hands and cheered loudly. Despite being sad to see them go, every one of them smiled as the Golden Fleece set sail in high spirits.

The weather was gorgeous, and the breeze was wonderfully refreshing.

Their next destination: The Deep Darkness!

Chapter 8 – Ness's Sanctuaries

South of Foggyland, just beyond the horizon, a New World paradise gently lay its lush, verdant form out across the very middle of the open ocean.

Actually, while the term “New” had been given to it by arrogant folks from the more developed nations, this land had already been properly inhabited, and for who knows how many tens of thousands of years, by the Reku tribe, the Kuna tribe, and the Apil tribe. The various indigenous peoples each had their own unique lifestyles and aesthetics, and they had no real contact with the civilizations that had sprung forth in the northern lands over the past two thousand years or so. They lived out their lives in peace along the banks of the rivers that carved this way and that through the subtropical jungles. They built simple, raised huts at the water's edge and caught fish from small canoes. The women gathered fruits and nuts and cared for their children, and the men honed their skills with spears and bows...that's the kind of life they led. They took nothing more from their bountiful environment than they needed. They were really a very ecological society. All of the smaller rivers were branches of the Miru-Miru River. All of the people were children of the Miru-Miru. This was a very common saying in the region.

The vast inner depths of the Miru-Miru basin were known as the Deep Darkness. Due to the fact that it was incredibly expansive and complex, full of marshes, and so overgrown that there was often no place for a person to walk or even stand, it had never been fully explored.

However, very recently, a wave of development had begun to advance toward this continent. A village near the shore was made into a harbor, and in the blink of an eye it had grown into a huge city known as Newport. This was now the capital city. Roads were paved, making way for hotels, banks, and supermarkets. Eventually there were even gas stations, duty-free shops, and video rental chains. Tourists carrying a strange thing called money came in one after another, covering the beautiful beaches in the pungent odor of sun tan oil and throwing drunken parties and feasts, where more food than they could ever possibly eat was prepared for them.

Because labor was in short supply, offers of employment were extended to the natives, but if they wanted to work in this capital city, they would need to learn the language of the people who controlled it. They would also have to learn how to make change for their currency, and how to read and write in this new language. And, they needed to move close enough to be able to commute to schools in the city. These foreigners from the north insisted that it was a parent's duty to make sure their children studied. If their children did not receive a proper education, they would have trouble in life once they grew up...or so these foreigners had told them.

The native adults, who didn't have the heart to question the foreigners' fervent convictions, moved to the city right away and enrolled their children in local schools. But, in this city, they couldn't simply build the kind of homes they liked in any place they saw fit. Every piece of land and every tree belonged to someone. If you used these things without permission, you'd end up in jail. If you wanted to live in one of the pre-constructed homes, which looked so much like anthills made of concrete, you had to pay something called rent. You couldn't just go out and find food whenever you felt you needed it, either. In the supermarkets, the shelves were stuffed daily with more varieties and higher quantities of food than the natives had ever seen in their lives, but if they wanted any, they had to hand over that stuff called money. And so first they had to work, in order to get that money.

Well, it was just as the foreigners had said–the native adults who hadn't received an education did have trouble. They couldn't understand what was said to them, and they couldn't read the foreign writing, so they couldn't get the kinds of jobs that paid a decent amount of money. And when it was discovered that they didn't quite understand money in the first place, quite often they were cheated out of it. Day in and day out, they would work as hard as they could, but it felt as though they were never making any money. And then...what a surprise! Once they finally got some money, they found out they had to pay for it. For it was, naturally, the responsibility of all those who had made money through their hard work to pay something called taxes.

Boy, the city sure was full of responsibilities!

With things as they were, the natives felt they would have preferred to live on the verdant banks of the river instead. They wished they had never come to the city, and had never gotten involved with things like money at all. If they hadn't, their children could learn to catch fish, play with their younger brothers and sisters, and live a peaceful life...

They had many regrets, but it was too late now. Somehow, before they had even realized it, the riverbanks had come to belong to someone else now, too. Now the land, the huts, the fish, and all the trees apparently belonged to foreigners who never even planned to go there, and if the natives tried to take these things back quietly, they were called thieves. If they wanted to live there again, they would just have to work hard and buy the land back. And in order to ever be able to afford it, they'd have to work, work, and work, for countless hours throughout the rest of their lives.

Because of this, great numbers of villages now stood deserted along the banks of the branches of the Miru-Miru River.

And in one of those villages...

Waves the color of milk coffee lapped at the support beams holding up a small hut with a palm-thatched roof and many gaps in its floorboards. Moored to one of the support beams by a rope that was tangled in old swampweed, there was a small boat which was submerged halfway under the water due to a hole in its bottom, and it had become a playground for little fish. Two of the beautifully-colored birds native to these jungles flew down from the treetops, chirping happily to one another–a mated pair perhaps. A human's discarded tools and items tend to make wonderful nesting material for birds. They approached the hut unafraid, as they believed it to be abandoned. But...

“THEY TOOK DOWN THE KRAKEN?!”

...Suddenly, a loud voice came booming from within the once-empty hut. Startled, the little birds fled in a panic.

“What are you saying? Explain yourself,” growled something that looked like a mound of flesh, and which took up more than half of the space on the wooden floor of the hut.

“There's not much to explain,” a mysterious figure replied, nervously. He was wrapped in tight, white, and very out-of-place clothing that made him look somewhat like a skier. He also wore wide, mirrored glasses. He was sitting on the floor, and his body was squared up awkwardly like someone who had been invited to an unfamiliar fancy tea party.

“Everything was going just as usual,” the mysterious figure continued. “The Kraken was so ferocious, so savvy, so confident as it reared its head beside the boat, kicking up fierce waves as it went. And that head of his was massive and monstrous. It even bared all of its teeth, in perfect rows. I was the one who taught it how to smile like that, by the way. ...And thanks to all that intimidation, the middle-aged male human at the helm was just as terrified as I promised he'd be, crying, 'I-i-i-i-i-it's comiiiing!' and trembling like a leaf, but...”

“...But?”

“...Yes, well,” the mysterious figure began, as he pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed at his face. “First of all, the skinny one, the one with the glasses...he said something incredibly callous, like, 'That must be a relative of Tessie's!' or something like that. And then he had the nerve to add, 'Since she's in the ocean, maybe we should call her Oshie'...!' It was cruel, just too cruel! I'm certain it threw that Kraken into quite a fit of depression. After all, despite outward appearances, it's always been so sensitive and easily wounded. Oh, the poor Kraken...”

“...And then?” growled the pink mound of flesh, impatiently.

Flustered, the mysterious figure went on. “Next there was that yellow-headed girl. She cried, 'PSI FREEZE!', of all things! Well, lately, that studious Kraken has been closely following all the discussions going on in the Human News, and has its own personal opinions on the subject of gun control and things like that. It knew very well that 'FREEZE!' means 'DON'T MOVE!', so you can understand why it politely stood as still as it could, can't you? ...And then, the one with the very narrow eyes came in with his bare fists flying...but even worse than that, the rude, arrogant little one with the baseball cap rushed in too, swinging an aluminum bat!”

“Enough, I get it,” the mound of flesh replied, as he waved his pudgy hand coldly and let out a pensive sigh. “That was supposed to buy us some time. The Kraken wasn't as effective as advertised. ...Hey, Super Starman, did you bring that catalog with you, again? I want to see it.”

“Oh, yes, yes! Here you are, sir,” replied the mysterious figure, who was apparently called Super Starman. He pulled something wrapped in purple cloth from behind his back and unfastened it. The cloth contained something that looked like a photo album. “Monster List” was stamped on the cover in gold lettering. The Super Starman held it up with both hands and hurriedly crawled over to the mound of flesh on his knees. He showed off the book one page at a time.

Each page displayed a set of four things that looked like résumés. There were photos, graphs, and charts filled in with specs and data.

“These here are all the latest additions for this fall,” said the Super Starman. “...And everything over here is being sold at or below cost–these are incredible deals!”

“...What's this?” scoffed the fleshy mound. “Octobots? Manly Fish? ...These are nothing special. Don't they have anything a little stronger?”

“Well, how about something like this Mook Senior?” replied the Super Starman. “It has three-hundred-ninety HP, and its Guts are at fifty. Its special abilities are Life Up α and PSI Magnet...”

“Alright. Prepare ten of those. What else?”

“Hmm...may I recommend a mixed team of Fobbies, Uncontrollable Spheres, and Conducting Spirits? The Electro Spector and Hostile Elder Oak will also get the job done nicely.”

“Well then, call them all in,” replied the mound of flesh. “Call them all! Let's not be stingy. We've still got plenty of energy left...” Glancing in a very bored and uninterested way at each page as the Super Starman flipped through the album, he suddenly let out a small “Oh!”, and leaned forward excitedly. His flabby body undulated in waves. “...Wait a minute, let me see that page!”

“Hm? Oh? Which one?” the Super Starman replied, startled.

“Those, there. Those monsters.”

The mound of flesh pointed toward them with a grin.

The Wetnosaur. The Chomposaur. Each one had an entire page to themselves. They got the Star Treatment. “I want those two! Bring them to me!”

“Oh but, but Master Giygas,” the Super Starman began, as he rubbed his hands together nervously. “I'm terribly sorry, but those two are just too massive! We wouldn't be able to get them through our inter-dimensional transmitter device unless we cut them into pieces!”

“Well then, construct a new inter-dimensional transmitter device,” barked the mound of flesh. “You could have some of your robots work on it, couldn't you? Make one as soon as possible, one so big that these things could march through it on parade, with smiles on their faces. ...Hehehe, this is fun!” The droopy cheeks on the mound of flesh jiggled. Apparently he had grinned.

“...And if we make all that effort to get them here, then they have to pull their weight,” he continued. “Put a bunch of mid-tier monsters out before them. I want to watch that bastard Ness get squashed flat trying to run for his life! I have to see that! ...Alright. I'm done talking. Get out!”

“Y-yes, sir!”

Bowing so deeply that his hands and head practically hit the floor, Super Starman began to fade and distort like an image on a television that had lost its signal. At last he vanished, leaving behind the terrible scent of burning ozone. After he was gone, only that mountainous mound of flesh remained.

At a glance, he no longer looked anything like a human being. He had become so overweight that his flesh spilled out in countless flabby folds, and he looked like a pile of uncooked biscuits. With a body like this, of course he could not find clothes that fit him anymore, so he had wrapped two bath towels with Miffy Bunny patterns on them around his waist as a sorry excuse for coverings.

Being as inhumanly obese as he was now, it was a wonder that he bothered feeling uncomfortable about being naked at all. But if he'd had an average person's level of shame, he probably would have been embarrassed about his body in any case–covered or not. It was unsightly, and it was ghastly. On top of that, rather than being intimidating or scary, his figure was downright laughable.

That's right...this was the present state of Pokey Minch.

“Master Giygas, huh?” With a wry smile and a grunt of exertion, Pokey braced his arms, which looked like stacks of doughnuts, against the floor, and somehow he managed to get to his feet.

Right behind where he had been sitting, that eerie golden statue was on display.

“That's what everyone's been calling me,” he went on. “...Oh well. If they want to call me that, they can. Maybe in their dimension, 'Giygas' means leader, or boss, or ruler, or president, or god, or something.”

The flimsy floorboards creaked as Pokey stepped outside. There, in an open area of land just next to the hut–a spot where, when this place was a lively village, natives once gathered to craft items around a bonfire–was Pokey's father, Aloysius Minch.

Looking very much like a jungle explorer, he was wearing an outfit covered with many pockets, complete with shorts and a safari hat, but his clothes were very dirty, worn out, and torn. His face was covered in stubble and dirt, there were black bags under his eyes, his cheeks were drawn in tight, and his bloodshot eyes glared exhaustedly from beneath his reading glasses. On the ground to his right there was a decent sized heap of palm fronds cut into short, even pieces, and to his left there were stacks of these cut palm fronds that had been arranged into neat bundles.

Pokey approached him. He could hear his father muttering to himself.

“...Ninety-six, ninety-seven, ninety-eight...” Aloysius was counting the palm fronds, piece by piece. “...Ninety-nine, one hundred!” Carefully gathering the hundred fronds, he bundled them together with a rubber band. He added this bundle to the pile at his left side, jotted something down in the notebook in his lap, and then, wiping the sweat from his brow with his sleeve, Aloysius Minch gave a satisfied smile.

“...Dad,” Pokey addressed him, gloomily. “Aren't you hungry?”

“Oh, Pokey,” Aloysius replied. “Look at this, I've already made five-hundred-eighty-three-thousand-seven-hundred dollars!” He pointed proudly at the heap of palm fronds. “...And there's still so much more I have yet to count!”

“You don't have to keep counting it like that,” said Pokey, smiling even though it looked as if he was on the verge of tears. “...No one's going to take it from you. Besides, it's almost time to eat, you should have some food.”

“Yeah, but, just give me a little more time,” said Aloysius. “I'll take a break once I get to six-hundred-thousand.” He winked one of his feverish eyes at Pokey, then he turned back to the palm fronds, and one by one he began counting them again. “One, two, three, four...”

Pokey closed his eyes and then opened them again only slightly...although the flesh around his eyelids had become so puffy that he could hardly open them at all. He shook his head gently. “I guess you got hit pretty hard, huh,” he said.

He looked to the far end of the jungle and could see a black metal rod jutting out from the ground halfway up a hill. ...It was the charred remains of the crashed helicopter.

They had lost control of it when Pokey had suddenly grown even larger, pushing them well over the craft's weight limit. Dumping all the cash they had made from their schemes in Twoson and Fourside into the ocean and jungle, they barely managed to make it this far. When they hit the ground, somehow Pokey made it through without so much as a mosquito bite, but Aloysius had been pinned under his son's massive body and had been unable to breathe, so he had lost consciousness. Hurrying to escape before the gasoline could catch fire, Pokey took his father in his arms, strapped the golden Mani Mani statue to his back, and then ran for his life...until at last he had found this village. The exhausted Pokey fell asleep almost immediately. When he woke up again, he quickly noticed that Aloysius was mindlessly cutting palm fronds down to the size of dollar bills, and devoting his undivided attention to counting them.

Soon after this, that Super Starman had appeared, from who knows where. He introduced himself as a being from an inter-dimensional world, and said that he would follow any of Pokey's–er, Giygas'–orders.

He was also fully in support of Pokey taking over this world “as soon as possible!”, he had said.

“But I don't want the world,” said Pokey. “...Not particularly.” Shaking his head, he climbed down into the river. He had left the towels on the floor of the hut and was now completely naked. His bare feet sank deep into the muddy riverbed.

“How did I end up here?” he wondered aloud. Little fish came to nibble at Pokey's fingers as he spread them out in the water. Surely, the fish had mistaken them for sausages. A larger fish began to approach, hunting the smaller ones. Pokey held still and waited. He waited so patiently... Finally, the large fish came right up beside him, and... KER-SPLASH! He lunged for the fish and caught it. The fish struggled and splashed. Holding it by its tail, he whacked it with a thud! against one of the hut's support beams to knock it out, and then Pokey began to eat it immediately. While he knew it would have tasted better cooked, he felt too impatient to start a fire. He was so hungry...

“I have to go south, I have to go deeper into the jungle. ...I don't really know why. But...I'll find out if I go there, I think. There's something I have to do.”

Munch, munch, flip-flop... In a bit of a daze, Pokey ate the still-wriggling fish. With its blood smeared around the edges of his mouth, he smiled wide. “When I get there, I'm sure I'll see that bastard Ness...and I'm gonna slaughter him!”

Meanwhile, on Ness's side of things...

When their beautiful sailing ship, the Golden Fleece, arrived in the harbor of Newport, a huge crowd of people came out to greet them. Ever since that dangerous sea monster, the Kraken, had appeared, hardly any overseas travel to or from Newport had been possible. Someone had cried, “There's a ship coming in–from overseas!”, and anyone who had a moment to spare, and even some who did not, gathered around to see it for themselves.

As soon as a crowd of news reporters ran up to him, Captain Mone casually threw it out there that they had slain the sea monster, and this caused a bit of trouble for all of them. Word spread all through the town within a day, and the streets became clogged with people who wanted to see these brave heroes with their own eyes. A convertible car was arranged to be sent for them, and they were crowned with flowers and driven around in circles in an endless parade. As a brass band struck up its celebratory performance, Polly the Parrot became so flustered he made a fuss and then flew off somewhere in a huff. When evening came, a passionate welcome banquet was thrown for them at the town's finest hotel, the Great Southern International Resort.

“We can't afford to play around too much,” Ness sighed, as he stood in the hotel room they'd rented in order to get some rest.

The hotel had provided him with a change of clothes–formal attire for the celebration's Warrior Dance. He wore a cloth around his waist and very heavy hand-beaded accessories around his arms and ankles and over his bare chest. Instead of his usual baseball cap, he wore a bonnet covered in feathers. And on top of all of that, apparently he was expected to carry around a spear with bright red tassels.

“...I wanted to go after Pokey as soon as possible,” he added.

“Aww, don't say it like that!” Captain Mone replied. “They're being very kind to us after all, aren't they?” The captain was still in high spirits from all the liquor he'd been offered all day long. He had also been provided with an elegant silver tuxedo. “Just eat yourself silly, get some rest, and set out a little later than you planned, that's all.”

“...I guess so,” Ness muttered.

“Are you guys ready in there?”

There was a knock at the door, and then Jeff and Poo let themselves in. “Whoa, Ness,” Jeff gasped. “That doesn't suit you at all, does it?”

“Yeah, well...why didn't you guys get changed?” Ness asked.

“Mine wasn't the right size,” Jeff replied.

“You liar.”

“Okay, to tell you the truth, I'd look really stupid in that outfit and these glasses, don't you think?” Jeff admitted. “And if I don't wear my glasses, I can't even walk.”

“As for me, because I am a Kumari, I am forbidden to wear anything but purified cloth woven by purified hands,” Poo added, as straight-forward as ever. “My apologies to these heathens.”

“...Ugh,” Ness moaned. “Oh, but I wonder how it's going for Paula.”

“Sorry to keep you all waiting!”

There was another knock at the door, and then it opened.

Everyone gasped.

A fan of feathers like a peacock's tail, around three feet in diameter, spread out from behind her shoulders. She wore a cape made of strings of natural pearls, and seashells covered her chest. From her waist down, she wore a sparkling, rainbow-colored skirt that shimmered like a mermaid's fins. She looked like she was going to a costume ball, or as if she were a showgirl, or...my goodness, like the queen of a carnival!

“D...d...don't stare at me like that!” Paula stammered, her cheeks turning red. “We went through all that trouble to get here, and they said this is a formality... Plus, I'll never get to dress this way again in my whole life!”

So, well, they all went down to the great hall for the buffet party, which was full of people and all kinds of food. As they may have expected in this southern land, there were no lengthy speeches, or anything like that. Once a toast had been raised in their honor there was time for very casual conversation, but the captain and the children were being pulled in every direction at once. For quite a while, they couldn't find an opportunity to enjoy much of the food at all.

“Let's not be shy,” said Paula. “We should take this chance to eat as much as we can!” She pulled Ness by his hand (probably because she wanted to stay together with the only other person in their group who was dressed this way, Ness figured) and, whacking the people around her with that fanned peacock-tail as she went, she brought him over to the buffet corner along the wall. “There's sushi, curry, tempura...wow, it's almost overwhelming! Oh, Ness, look! They even have a hamburger stand!”

“Huh? ...Oooh!”

“Oh? O-ohhhh!”

A cry escaped Ness, and he couldn't stop himself from pointing. Over at the hamburger stand, a man in an excessively tall red and white-striped chef's hat, who was busy grilling burgers, looked up, and with an expression of sudden recognition, he couldn't help but cry out himself as he pointed back at Ness.

“Papa!” Ness cried. Poised with his spear, he charged. In a panic, nearby party guests leapt out of his way.

“Ness! Ness, is it really you?!” The man replied, and in a way that was so very characteristic of Ness's father, he opened his arms wide while still holding his spatula.

With the burgers sizzling away on the hotplate beside them, the father and son held each other tight.

“Oh my gosh, is that right?!” his father gasped. “The heroes everyone's talking about, the ones who took out that monster...they were you and your friends? That's quite a surprise!”

“I'm surprised, too!” said Ness. He smiled beneath the red, white, and yellow stripes painted across his face. “This is where you ended up on your important overseas business trip, papa?!”

“That's right,” his father replied. He seemed a bit dazzled by Ness's brightly painted face, but he smiled back, warmly. “By order of Mr. Minch, I was flown around from place to place and finally ended up on this side of the ocean. ...And goodness, it was worth the trip! Hardly anyone in this country had ever even seen a burger before! They thought they were 'delicious, so very delicious!' and it filled them with joy! It made me feel like a chef at some kind of high-class, fancy restaurant!”

“...I see,” said Ness, quietly. Suddenly he recalled the chaos of the Bio-Ness Burger incident in Fourside. It was clear that Aloysius Minch had had a hand in all that,but Ness kept that to himself, as he didn't want to cause his father any grief. “...I think mama misses you, though,” he said, instead.

“...Yeah,” his father replied. He looked troubled as he fiddled with the napkin he had folded like a stylish tie and hung around his neck. “I make sure to call Rachael long distance, from time to time. That's how I knew you had set out on a journey to fight the bad guys. I always thought I might run into you out here, somewhere, but I hadn't imagined it would be today!” Ness's father held his son's cheek with his large hand. “You're growing up so fast. You've really been working hard, Ness. And your papa isn't giving up, either. ...I'm going to make your beloved Ness Burger the number one burger in the entire world!”

It already is, to me, Ness thought to himself.

“But, I also want us both to return home as soon as possible,” his father went on. “Although, for some reason, no matter how many times I try to call, I haven't been able to catch Mr. Minch lately. I can't leave my post here without getting his permission first. ...Good grief, where could he have disappeared to? Last I knew, he had transferred to his office in Fourside, but...”

“...Uh, well, papa,” Ness began, with a frown. “...Mr. Minch is with Pokey right now. The two of them took a helicopter from Summers and flew off in this direction, but–”

“A helicopter?” his father interrupted. “Apparently a helicopter went down somewhere in the jungle very recently...”

“In the jungle?!” Ness cried.

“Yeah,” his father replied. “It was all over the news. A rescue party was sent out, but they gave up when they got to the more remote regions that aren't on any maps or anything. Since it's the dry season, the water levels in that area are too low to get any boats through. That's why at least ninety percent of this country is what they call the 'Deep Darkness'.”

“...The Deep Darkness,” Ness muttered. He balled his fist and touched it to his lips. He was reminded yet again of the prophecy of the hieroglyphs.

“Oh, and where are you staying, tonight?” his father asked. “Why not spend some quality time with your old man?”

“I'm sorry, papa,” Ness replied. “I'd really like to, but...we can't lose any more time. We have to get to the Deep Darkness right away!”

“What's that?!” said his father, as he blinked repeatedly and the color drained from his face. “Hey, you don't mean to tell me that...the 'bad guy' you guys are chasing down is...Aloysius Minch, do you?”

“...Not exactly,” Ness replied, quietly.

It's not Mr. Minch. It's Pokey. That fat, awful kid from next door!

...These thoughts echoed through his head, but he swallowed the words before he could say them out loud.

His father knew all about Pokey. When Pokey was very little, they even played together sometimes. Aloysius, the ruthless businessman, was always so busy he would say things like, “I don't have time to play around with children!”. And so, there was a time when Ness's father, who cherished his own children very much, also took in his neighbor's kids as his own, and adopted the responsibility of being a father to each and every one of them.

It wasn't just because they were his boss's children, either. Ness's father could see some of the very few good qualities there were in Pokey. He thought he had a lot of guts, and he adored Pokey very much.

Ness could remember it all. His father would gather him and his little sister, and Pokey and Picky too, and take them all fishing, camping, and bug-collecting together. One time, when they were only able to get three tickets to the IndyCar race, it was just Ness, his father, and Pokey who went. A trip with his fellow men! This event was for men's eyes only–no babies or girls allowed. Things were said that day which would have horrified Paula, if she had been there to hear them. “Don't tell anyone we did this, or they'll be jealous,” his dad had said, as they sat side-by-side eating extra-large ice cream cones.

Back then, Pokey wasn't as fat, and he wasn't as mean, either. When Ness was younger and still somewhat clumsy, Pokey would offer to help with things like taking a fish off a hook, or hanging up a hammock. Every time, he would make some arrogant comment, like, “What do you think? Awesome, right? Show some respect!” But...while it would be going too far to say he was like a big brother to Ness, Pokey certainly felt like a close cousin, or something like that.

Unfortunately, once he started going to school, Pokey's spirits quickly began to sink. And thinking about it now, Ness understood why. There were a lot of kids there he didn't know–a lot of very capable kids... Pokey was never very good at sports or studying, and since his little underlings Ness and Picky were still in kindergarten, he had no one he could rely on. Pokey, who always loved to be King of the Mountain, would have been devastated by this, wouldn't he? Wouldn't he have felt so out of place...?

That was around the time when Aloysius began making all his money. He could buy them absolutely anything they wanted. Remote controlled cars, the newest movies in any format, video game consoles... New things, expensive things, things no one else could get their hands on... Toys that would make any other kid wildly jealous, and in a shocking quantity, too. Every meal of every day was a feast. But...when you try to escape feelings of loneliness and anxiety by stuffing yourself with filling and comforting foods, over time you're bound to put on more and more weight. Because it became harder for him to move around as much, naturally, all of Pokey's outdoor activities came to a halt, and he began to play only in his own room. And his father still bought him as many new and wonderful toys as he wanted!

Due to this unhealthy lifestyle, Pokey's intellect and his physical reflexes grew dull and slow, and in the end his obesity became very apparent to everyone around him, as well. His classmates made fun of him. Fatty-fat, stupid Pokey, brainless fatso... Even if they hadn't meant it seriously, and even if they only meant to tease him a little...hurtful words still hurt.

Filled with misery and hatred, Pokey very quickly became a nasty, violent kid. He may not have been very good at sports, but he could fight. There was always a sense that he was not simply horsing around–he truly hated his classmates. And he never had to worry at all about the idea that they might hate him back, or about whether or not he seriously injured any of them. Because any time he really did hurt someone, his father would just cover it up with money! And that's when everyone stopped making fun of Pokey. They had no choice but to bow down to him. Even if the attention he was getting was negative, he had still become someone everyone had to pay attention to.

Oh, Pokey! Ness thought. At last, he fully understood. I gave up on you, too. I abandoned you. We were such good friends when we were little, and we played together all the time. When I realized everyone else hated you, I stopped playing with you, too. I avoided you. I pretended I didn't notice you, even if you were right there...

[That's right!] cried a voice inside Ness's head. He had a vision of someone as swollen as a pink balloon stuffing a live fish into his mouth and grinning widely. [That's right, Ness! You abandoned me. I knew it! You admit it...!]

Then, Ness remembered something else... Something that had happened on the playground of their grammar school... Ness, a first-year student, was walking home when he saw some kids from a higher grade practicing back hip circle flips over a vault bar. No...actually, the only one clinging desperately to the bar was that recognizably pudgy Pokey. The other students stood beside him and mocked him, grinning and laughing. “Left behind again, fat boy?” “You're a third year student and you can't even do one flip over the bar...yikes, that's embarrassing!” “But he can't help it, can he? Pokey's just a dumb pig after all.” “Yeah, a pig. Piggy-boy Pokey! Porky Pokey-Brand Pork! I bet they sell that in extra-large packs at your father's supermarket!”

No matter what they said, Pokey kept trying time and time again in silence. His face was bright red, his lips were pulled into a tense, straight line, and he struggled to lift his heavy behind over the bar. He built up momentum and then tried to hoist himself up. His chubby legs tore through the air over and over again, kicking up a cloud of dust at his feet. But his posture was poor and unstable. His pudgy arms had dimples at the wrists like a baby's. Just a little more...just a little more, and... No, there was no way he could do this! Then, probably because his hands had become so slippery with sweat, he suddenly fell over backwards. The older kids roared with laughter. With his face covered in sand, Pokey spat and tried to get up. ...And then, as he lifted his head, he suddenly happened to look toward Ness. Ness stood frozen in surprise there on the playground. His gaze met Pokey's straight on.

[He saw all of that!] Despair flashed through Pokey's eyes. [My 'little brother' Ness saw this whole embarrassing thing!] His already reddened face turned an even brighter shade of scarlet, and then it changed to an almost purple color.

Ness suddenly realized that he was walking away. He had averted his gaze from the mortified Pokey and had quickened his pace. His heart was pounding loudly. His throat had gone dry. His shoulders felt tense and stiff, and he could hear the rowdy shouts of the older kids growing louder and more intense. “Come on, come on, pull yourself together!” “Hey, you bent the bar by hanging on it like that. You're such a pest!” “Hey piggy, why don't you oink for us? Hey... Oink for us!” Wham. Thud. Ness could hear the sound of their kicks. “Uwaaugh!” ...And Pokey's cries. His moaning.

Ness shut his eyes tight and walked even faster. Before he knew it, he was running. I have to stop them, it's not fair for them to gang up on one person like that. I need to stop them now! he thought, but in the end, they were bigger than he was, and there were five or six of them, no less. “Help me, someone, help me!” Pokey cried, in a shrill voice. It sounded like he was on the verge of tears. But, who would help him? Who else, if not Ness...? I have to go back...I have to go back and defend him! Ness thought. But...

A crystal-clear image came back to him behind his closed eyelids. Pokey's purple face, twisted into a scowl as he glared at Ness. His expression...so frustrated, so mortified, and so terribly pained. A look of stubborn refusal. It almost seemed as though he didn't want Ness to be the one to save him.

If he really wanted me to help him, he wouldn't have made a face like that! Ness thought as he kept running, in a daze. He ran and he ran...and when the school was no longer in sight, he knelt by the side of the road and he cried. He cried because he was a coward... Because Pokey was so shameful... Because they were both so awful...!

The time they had shared together when they were very young sparkled in his memory like diamonds, but then, in an instant, it all vanished. Ness couldn't be friends with someone like him–how could he possibly think of someone so awful as his friend?! And he was sure that from that moment on, Pokey felt the same way about him.

So that's it. That's where it all began. Even though we lived right next door to each other, I started avoiding Pokey as much as I could. If we passed one another, I didn't say a word...I didn't even care enough to ask how he was doing! And now that I think of it...it was only after all that happened that Pokey became really, truly nasty, wasn't it? So then...was it me...no one else, but me...who caused Pokey to turn into such a terrible person...?!

[That's right, that's absolutely right! Have you finally figured it out, now?] Ness could hear Pokey's roaring laughter in his mind. [Maybe you didn't think it was such a big deal, but I never forgot about it, not even once! And so... And so I... Until the day I die, I will never, EVER forgive you...!]

...Ohh, I'm sorry...I'm so sorry, Pokey!

“Ness? Ness, snap out of it!” Paula cried, as she grabbed Ness's arm. “I...I intercepted your telepathy, but...everything was kind of hazy, so I didn't quite understand what was going on. That pathetic fatso I saw just now...who was that? Was it that...'Pokey' guy?”

“...Paula,” Ness began with a frown, as he quickly wiped his eyes. “Please, I know you may not like him very much, but...please don't call him 'fatso' in front of me, anymore.”

“Oh...okay,” Paula replied. “I won't, but...”

“...The seed of evil is steadily growing,” said Poo. He appeared out of nowhere wearing the same mysterious expression as always–an expression which made one wonder just what he was thinking–and he spoke as bluntly as ever. “Before too long...the monster will be born.”

“Heeeyy, I found out where that helicopter went!” Jeff called. Carrying a huge bag of fried chicken and french fries, he pushed his way through the crowd and ran up to them. “I'm pretty sure the alien detector was able to pick up the trail!”

“Whoa...really? Alright!”

I'm in a battle now, Ness thought.

...Against Giygas...

...And against the one Giygas took as his host...against Pokey...

He closed his eyes tightly. The past was in the past. This was the present. And fate had entangled each of the two boys in a battle for the earth.

One clear day, when it was just barely spring...

Upstream of the Onett River where runoff from piles of melting snow trickled down in pure little brooklets...

Early in the morning...

The two of them gripped the end of a fishing rod tightly, and though they were soaked down to their underwear, they were sure they were about to land a huge trout. ...But then, in an instant, it wriggled furiously, snapped the line, and swam away. Even so, they both congratulated one another on a job well done, and put their arms around each other's shoulders, laughing.

...That was a day they would never...ever see again.

Ness opened his eyes.

His father was introducing himself to Paula and Jeff. He was saying things like, “It's nice to meet you,” and, “Please take care of my son,” things like that, and it somehow didn't seem real. His father was a large and gentle man, and was always as warm and kind as a sunny day. He was the type of person who, even after being cheated by a neighbor he trusted, did not lose heart, or get upset, or despise that neighbor–he just continued to do his job to the best of his ability. Ness wondered if his father possibly hated himself for getting into that situation in the first place. Or if...perhaps, he had hated himself at one time, but had since gotten over it.

This vibrant, lively celebration seemed like something from another world. The crowds of men and women all dressed up, the plentiful food and plentiful drink...everyone so cheerful, so content, and so happy... Each and every guest looked as though they had not one single care in the world. But could that really be true? Had they never hurt someone they truly cared about, or ended up failing at something they thought was going to be easy? ...Had they never betrayed a friend, even though they hadn't meant to? ...Had none of them ever done such a thing, even once?

Then...he heard a sizzling sound. The edges of the burgers were beginning to burn. The smell of it brought Ness to his senses, very suddenly.

“You can't let the burgers burn, papa!” he cried.

“Whoops, sorry, sorry!” his father replied, as he hastily turned his attention back to the grill. “Darn, they're already too far gone. I'm really, really sorry, Mister Cow...”

“Papa, I have to head out,” said Ness, as he gripped his spear tightly. “There's somewhere I have to go, and there's something I have to do. ...Please, pray for us. Pray that we'll be able to fix everything. ...And that both of us, him and me, will return to Onett safely in the end!”

With that, he turned on his heel, and was just about to run off, when...

“Wait, Ness!”

...His father hurriedly wrapped up a few of the burgers. “At least take these with you,” he said. “Papa's own Custom-made Special Deluxe Extra-Tasty Burgers!”

Ness, Paula, Jeff, and Poo.

The four of them had rented a small boat and were making their way upstream on one of the branches of the Miru-Miru River. Oh, and of course, Ness and Paula had properly returned those native costumes, and were wearing their usual clothes again.

They each took turns rowing. In the shallows, they often had to get out and push. At a point where fallen trees had completely blocked their way forward, they were forced to abandon the boat and continue on foot, covered up to their shoulders in muddy water.

The riverbanks were crowded by bizarre-looking trees which had many, many roots growing right from the middle of their branches. The roots, which reached all the way down to the water's surface, were about as thick as Ness's wrists, and he couldn't really tell the difference between them and the tree trunks themselves. They looked like the half-sunken bones of some very tall creature with hundreds of long legs, or like a woven basket belonging to a giant.

There were various types of tall palm trees, trees with fruits that looked something like lemons, and trees wrapped in flowering ivy which would not have looked out of place as part of a grand and beautiful gateway to some sort of royal courtyard.

Eventually the river was swallowed up by the trees and greenery, becoming more like a bog dotted with ferns. Then it deepened again and opened up suddenly into a round pond. In the gaps between tightly-packed lotus leaves that were as large as kiddie pools, countless sleepy-eyed crocodiles stuck their muzzles up out of the water. Paula shuddered fearfully, but Poo approached the water's edge, performed several mudra with his hands, and uttered some strangely reverberating words. Suddenly the crocodiles all gathered together and lined up side-by-side, creating a path for them over the water! Cautiously they crossed over this rough and bumpy crocodile bridge, and they found that the opposite shore was nice and dry. The ground was solid, sturdy, and easy to walk on. But the vegetation still grew so thickly that they had to be very cautious, otherwise they might trip and scrape their knees.

It was very dark in this jungle, even in the middle of the day, so they huddled together to keep from getting separated and lost. There were trees with round leaves, and trees with long, narrow leaves... Tree trunks with patterns like a snake's scales, tree trunks covered in lumpy bumps... The trees were all so wildly different–some shaped like fountains of water, some shaped like brushes, and some shaped like stark, straight pillars. Garlands of flowers and vines draped from above like swings. Bright sunlight streamed down through the high treetops so that everything around them looked like a green curtain adorned with golden embroidery. A small shadow flew through the branches high overhead, and they thought they may have seen a friendly little monkey chasing curiously after it. Spiders the size of a full-grown adult's shoe built huge, intricate webs, and a snail larger than Ness's open palm crept along a tree branch.

Caaaw, caaaw! Kiii-eeii! Ki-eeeeii! Crrroak, crrrroak! Grrrowl, ggrrrroowl! Prrreeeep-peep-peep! An overwhelming chorus of birds, animals, and insects made them want to cover their ears, but the four of them continued to trudge along, side-by-side, in silence.

“Ohh, I'm so itchy!” Jeff cried suddenly, scratching furiously at his arms. “Augh, I got bit! Must have been a pretty determined mosquito, since I covered myself with bug spray...”

“You should be alright, I don't think malaria is a problem around here,” said Paula, with a frown. “But don't scratch so hard, you're sending mud flying everywhere.”

“Speaking of which, Paula, I'm impressed,” said Ness. “Thinking back, you haven't had one complaint this whole time. This must be a terrible trek for a girl. I figured you were gonna start crying back there, when we found out we'd have to wade through all that mud!”

“Oh, don't be ridiculous!” Paula scoffed. “It was a little annoying, sure, but I'm fine with all this. If I think of it as a free mud bath, I feel lucky, even! And then I just look forward to a nice, refreshing shower later.”

“But, aren't rivers like the one from before usually filled with blood-sucking leeches?”

“W...w-w-w...what did you just say?!” Paula cried, as her face suddenly went pale. “L-l-l...leeches? S...s...so then, those things that were trying to kiss me under the water back there... Those weren't little fishies...? They were ticklish, so I shooed them away with PSI, but I...I didn't think they could be leeches...leeches! Why didn't you tell me earlier?!”

“I mean, it looks like it was better that we didn't tell you back there.”

Walking along as though he were weightless, Poo had taken up the position at the head of the group. Suddenly his ears twitched, and he threw his arms out to the side to stop the others in their tracks. “Hm...something is afoot.”

“Jeff, don't say it,” said Ness.

“Don't say what?” Jeff asked.

“You know, the old '...And this is a hand!' gag,” Ness replied.

“...When have I ever said anything so stupid?!”

“Waah, I'm sorry, please don't strangle me, that hu-rt-s!”

Ness struggled as Jeff grabbed him by the collar and shook him, but then...

Gyaaaaaaa~!

...An ear-splitting, echoing scream shook the whole jungle around them! Suddenly, birds of all colors flew off in fright. Monkeys swooped from limb to limb through the trees just like Tarzan. Rustle, rustle, rustle, swish, swoosh, swish! In their panic, some of the animals lightly grazed the heads of Ness and the others as they sped past.

“Uwaaugh!”

“W-what is it? Is it some kind of enemy?”

“It's over there!”

They ran through the pathless jungle. They climbed over tree roots and plodded through rotting leaves. They slipped on slimy mosses, and clung to hanging vines. At last they came to a large clearing that opened up suddenly, right in the middle of the forest.

There on the ground was a huge flower, around fifteen feet in diameter, which appeared to have fallen from somewhere. You know when you sometimes think to yourself, on a hot summer day, that you'd like to make some roast beef, so you take it out of the refrigerator and put it on your cutting board, but then you get a call from a really good friend you haven't heard from in a long time, and you two talk for-ever about this and that, and then you go out somewhere and come back, take a bath, go to sleep, and wake up again...and then with a sudden gasp, you remember that chunk of meat you left out, which has since become thoroughly rancid? Well, this flower was the exact color and scent of that. And right in the middle of the thing, caught by its tail and struggling to get free, was a little baby monkey. Ah, so this flower hadn't fallen from anywhere–it had bloomed there on the ground, just like that. And now, using its stamens like fangs, it was attempting to swallow that poor little monkey whole!

“That's a rafflesia! The world's largest entomophilous flower!” Jeff cried, showing off his extensive knowledge of miscellaneous subjects once again. “That unbelievable odor is meant to attract flies and other insects, which help with pollination...but it's strange that this one has fangs. Whoa, just as I thought, the alien detector is going off! This thing must have gone crazy from Giygas' dark influences!”

“So what should we do?” asked Poo, as he crossed his arms with a very serene expression on his face. “That monkey is no concern of ours. And if we quickly go on our way, that creature will probably just leave us alone.”

“What?! No, we have to save it!” cried Paula. “We can't just let it be killed!”

kii, kikii, kiiii! The captured little monkey cried out in despair. It had already been swallowed up to its backside! Scattered about in the tops of the trees was a troop of monkeys which appeared to be the little one's family, and they cried out fervently in screeching voices that sounded like nails being scraped across glass. But in the end, none of them seemed to have the courage to come down out of the trees. The fretful trembling and fidgeting of the monkeys sent several leaves fluttering down below. A woolly caterpillar the size of a sausage tumbled down out of one of the trees, and Paula gave a piercing yelp! and clung to Jeff.

“...Hyaaaaaaaah!”

Suddenly, Ness tossed some sort of silver can into the air, and with a satisfying crack!, he hit it with his bat. On and on the silver can flew... The rafflesia's body trembled nervously as it swiftly arranged its petals into the shape of a huge catcher's mitt and waited for impact. Whump! STRIIIIKE! The rafflesia, being made almost entirely out of lip and mouth, stretched itself into a cheeky grin. But then...

That mouth, still in the shape of a smile, began to twist...and contort...and twist some more, until... Ah, AHH......AAH-CHOO! AAAAH-CHOOOO!

That's right! What Ness had lobbed over to the creature was...a can of pepper!

Along with a disgusting amount of flower-slobber, the little monkey was sent tumbling, and it scrambled hastily up the nearest tree. Off it scurried through the branches. Kii-kii, kiiii! ...And running toward it with her arms outstretched was another monkey who must have been the little one's mother. They clung to one another joyfully, hand-in-hand, but... “Ooh-kii?” Suddenly, the mother monkey noticed the little one's backside. Its tail was gone! On top of that, its backside was now totally smooth and hairless. Its little behind now looked like a bright red peach, and it was totally bare for all to see. “Kiiii...!” In an embarrassed panic, the little monkey tried to hide its backside, and its face turned a deep crimson.

In the meantime, Ness and his friends combined the powers of their PSI and weapons, and together they destroyed the creepy and foul-smelling rafflesia flower.

“It looks like the little monkey is safe now,” said Ness. “That's a relief, thank goodness! ...But our pepper supply is completely gone now, so for as long as we're stuck out here in the wilderness, the only seasoning we have left is salt.”

“Whoa, I can't believe it, this thing even has legs!” said Jeff. “That's definitely something for the science club report.” He studied the rafflesia, took some hurried photos, and jotted something down in his notebook.

“If that thing had sneaked up behind Poo and sucked up his ponytail,” Paula mused, “he would be totally bald right now, wouldn't he?”

“That thing could never sneak up on me,” said Poo, and his narrowed eyes became even sharper as he looked at Paula. “Why did you use me as an example there?”

“...Well,” Paula began, with a pout, “I guess it's because you said such terribly cruel things before!”

“I was only making certain of Ness's intentions,” Poo replied.

“You were...what?”

“Ness is the leader here,” Poo explained. “I am to obey him.”

“Oohh?” Paula gasped. “...So then, Ness gets to boss around a god? That's awesome!”

“That is my fate,” Poo replied, in a very disinterested tone and with the same neutral expression as always.

Paula's blue eyes opened wide, and for a short while she stared at Poo, intently. Poo narrowed his eyes even further, and then with a twitch, he turned away from her. Paula exhaled so deeply that her shoulders shook, and then, very suddenly, she reached out and hugged the slight and very bewildered Poo tightly.

“W...what are you doing?” he cried. “Let me go!”

“Ohh, you're so cute!” Paula squealed. “Poo, you're just so cute! ❤” She kissed his soft cheek. “You act all cool and to-the-point, but you're really very shy. It's adorable! ❤”

“Y...you insolent fool! How dare you defile the skin of a Kumari?!”

“Well excuuuse me, but which part of my kiss was dirty?” Paula huffed. “If you keep saying things like that, I'll just have to snatch your lips away!”

“Stop that, STOP IT!”

Poo finally dropped his state of total self-effacement as Paula's high spirits and feisty energy caught him completely off-guard. At the sight of their friend's flustered expression, Ness and Jeff shrugged their shoulders defeatedly.

“I think she might be the strongest member of our party,” said Jeff.

“I think so, too,” Ness replied, nodding energetically. “...Hey, let's go, you guys!”

So, well, there they were, the four of them, setting out through the jungle once more.

The sunlight forced its way down through the thick leaves and foliage. Deep greens, light greens, pale greens, somber greens... Greens tinged with gold, greens tinged with brown, greens that had gone almost white... With greens, greens, and more greens overflowing from every nook and cranny of the jungle, an occasional bird would flutter by, and that fleeting, vivid dash of blue or red would be a welcome sight to their tired retinas as they continued on and on for what seemed like forever. It was all so beautiful, so mystical...and they truly appreciated this gorgeous scenery that reminded them of the awesome power of mother nature, of the fact that trees and vegetation were what gave birth to the oxygen they breathed, and of all the blessings of the sun and the water. ...But, it did get a little depressing to take in such similar sights over and over again.

In mahjong, a hand of all-green tiles is a very useful one, but Ness wasn't familiar with the game. Perhaps Poo would know something about it...

In an attempt to find their way out of this greenery as soon as possible, they began to quicken their pace, and they chose straightforward routes that were more rugged than before. They forced themselves to climb over large plants and fallen trees, and tried to walk briskly through patches of slippery, slimy moss, coming very close to tripping and falling the entire time. Yes, even in the middle of a giant forest, some routes are easier to take than others. There are usually longer detours around these types of obstacles.

“Hey...I hope it's just my imagination,” Paula griped between ragged breaths, “...but I have a feeling...I've seen that same tree...many times now. Are you sure we're not...just going around...in circles?”

All four of them stopped in their tracks. Slowly they looked around at one another, and each seemed to be tinged with a slight greenish hue.

“What do you guys think...?” asked Ness.

“I was walking along free of any worldly thoughts,” said Poo.

“Truth be told, both the compass and the alien detector haven't been working at all for some time now,” said Jeff. “The magnetic field seems to have gone haywire.”

“This is bad, huh...”

The others stared motionlessly at Ness. This time, he had been the one in the lead. At a glance, it had seemed as though Ness's gait had been filled with confidence...but in truth, he had been feeling a bit unsure of himself for quite a while.

“Well, there's not much we can do about it, now,” he sighed. “I guess, first things first, we should stop here and get some rest.”

Ness looked for the softest bit of ground he could find and sat himself down. It was only then that he realized his whole body was racked with tension and exhaustion. Paula distanced herself a bit from the boys and began a few stretching exercises, and Poo climbed up into that all-too-familiar tree, crossed his legs, and entered a state of meditation. Jeff sat at Ness's side and pulled a tool kit out of his backpack.

“...Huh...?” Ness had been rolling his neck and shoulders to loosen them up when his eyes happened to stray, and they suddenly went wide. “Jeff?! What...what is that?” he cried.

“Hm?” Jeff looked up in surprise. “...Oh. Right. I hadn't shown this to you yet, huh.” He had rolled his pant leg up and had just touched a screwdriver to a spot near his knee. He gave half a chuckle.

“I have...prosthetic legs,” Jeff explained. “They got soaked in all that filthy water, and I can't let them get rusty. They need a bit of maintenance.”

Jeff quickly removed one of the legs. Using a mini vacuum, a canister of some kind of spray, and a small blower, he carefully checked it for dirt and debris and scrubbed it clean. He made adjustments here and there using an Allen key and a monkey wrench, and he applied machine oil. He carefully wiped away any excess oil, held the leg up to a sunbeam, checked it over, and then put it back on. With that one finished, he moved on to the other.

“...I didn't know,” Ness whispered. Even though he thought it was probably rude to stare, he found that he couldn't look away.

Jeff seemed very skilled at what he was doing. He probably had to tune those legs up like this frequently. But when? At night, when the rest of them had been asleep? Had he been up all alone, silently polishing these mechanical legs?

“I wasn't trying to hide them, or anything like that,” said Jeff. It seemed like he had finished. He gathered up the tools from his toolkit, sealed the waterproof case with a snap, and then he rolled his pant legs back down. “No...that's a lie,” he added. “The truth is, I was hiding a few things.”

“............”

“There was an accident,” he explained. “Do you remember seeing Jack, back in Summers? ...My brother was killed in the accident, and my legs were crushed from the knee down.”

“...Oh, I see,” Ness replied, biting his lip. “I don't know what to say.” He couldn't help but hang his head.

“Hey, hey now, come on! Don't worry about it!” said Jeff, and he clapped Ness on the back. “Ness, you're not the type who would let this kind of thing get you down, are you? That's exactly why I wasn't worried about you being beside me, and ended up taking them off and letting you find out.”

“Does it...hurt...?” Ness asked.

“It doesn't hurt at all,” Jeff replied. “My legs used to ache a bit from time to time, but this procedure was done very well.” He gently patted his legs through his pants. “My dad made these for me.”

“Oh that's right,” said Ness. “Your dad is an amazing scientist, isn't he?”

“Yeah, he's pretty amazing,” said Jeff, with a gentle smile. “But your dad's pretty amazing, too! Those burgers were really, really good.” ...They had eaten them all up while they were still riding in that boat a while back. “Without a doubt, I think they were the best burgers in the entire world.”

“Thank you,” said Ness.

“It's only the truth!”

“...No, I...I don't mean just for the compliments about my dad and his burgers,” Ness began. His throat felt tight, and he swallowed hard. “I wanted to thank you for coming along with me all this way. Jeff...I'm really glad you're my friend. Thank you.”

The two of them looked into each other's eyes. And at the same time, they each held the other's hand tight.

“And I hope we'll always be friends.”

“I hope so, too.”

After saying this with such absolute sincerity, Ness suddenly felt embarrassed, and with a little 'Tee-hehehe,' he started to laugh. Jeff couldn't help but giggle, too.

“Pfft, ahahahaha, wahhahahaha!”

“Aahh-hahahaha!”

The two of them were rolling with laughter, holding their bellies and kicking their feet, when suddenly...

“Aaaaahhh!”

...Echoing through the jungle, there came the frantic, delicate screams of a young girl! Poo alighted silently from the highest boughs of the tree, and then he dashed off without a word.

“That was Paula!”

“Where is she?”

But...

When Ness and Jeff rushed over in a panic to find out what was wrong, what they found was...

“...Ah, aahhh, that's the spot... Eek! Not there, that tickles!”

...Paula, lying face-down in a bed of moss and having her arms, legs, shoulders, and back massaged by a crowd of monkeys. Her golden hair was crowned with a wreath of flowers, and there was a chain of wild lilies around her neck. Surrounding her were more offerings of flowers and piles of fruit. Standing beside her was a long line of young monkeys using large banana leaves like fans, waving them intently and doing their best to keep her cool.

“...Aahhh, that's nice... This is the best!” Paula sighed.

When the boys took a good look at the little monkey standing on her back and giving her a full shiatsu massage, they noticed that it had no tail.

“Of course!” said Ness. “Those must be all the friends and family of that monkey we saved a little while ago.”

“Well, they're not exactly round, or chubby,” Jeff added, “but...they are small, at least, right?”

“If they were round and chubby, she'd probably be losing her mind again, like, 'Ahh, they're just so cute! ❤' right?” Ness replied teasingly, with a chuckle.

“Probably.”

“...Ahh, this all feels wonderful!” Paula cooed. “This is really, truly heaven, but...I think I've had enough. Thank you so much. ...You must all be so tired!” Paula smiled sweetly at each monkey in turn, and then she looked up. “Huh? Ness! And Jeff! Why are you just standing there staring?”

“Because, uh...”

“Oh! I know,” said Paula. “You guys want a massage too, right? Well then, come over here and lie down. Allow Miss Paula to demonstrate a secret technique she learned straight from her mama!” Paula puffed out her chest proudly and rolled up her sleeves.

“N-no, no thank you, I'm fine.”

“Me too! It's no good, I'm too ticklish.”

“Aww, really?” said Paula, looking disappointed. “What a shame...”

“Hey, Ness, I just got done talking with everyone,” said Poo. He had returned very suddenly, like a gust of wind. “They say they want to lead us somewhere.”

Ness looked amazed. “What?” he cried. “Poo...you can talk to monkeys?”

“Yes,” Poo replied. “Although I'm not quite fluent, of course.”

“Where do they want to lead us?”

“I don't know,” Poo admitted, and he shrugged, as if to say, does that part really matter? “There's just someplace they want to take us to, apparently.”

“Well, no matter where it is, we'll be lucky to get out of this maze of endless greenery, right?” said Jeff, and Ness couldn't agree more.

The monkey's family led the four of them up into the trees. It was conveyed to them that the monkeys wanted everyone to travel from limb to limb across the tallest treetops.

Climbing a tree is one thing, but traveling across treetops is something I doubt even someone who is truly confident in their athletic abilities has ever even tried. And it's no wonder, because it's a terribly difficult thing to do. For one thing, if your head tilts down even slightly, all the blood rushes to it, which is an awful feeling. It may be a very simple task for monkeys, who have nimble toes that can grip onto branches and whose arms are long enough that using all four limbs to move is less of a hassle, but for humans, who have weaker hips and a skeletal structure built for walking on two legs, it is clearly very difficult.

Adding to all that, the ground was now somewhere far below them, shrouded in a veil of greenery. They now saw the jungle they had grown so sick of looking at from a whole different angle. Every now and then, they had to jump for the next branch with all their might. This was only in a few places, but for someone with a fear of heights, the option to simply drop dead seemed far preferable. They would bounce on the tip of a branch to build momentum as if it were a spring board, and then, whoosh!, they would leap. And once they jumped, they needed to successfully grab on to something at their destination, anything at all, otherwise they'd quickly end up tumbling down head over heels!

The very agile Poo flew onward as if he were racing with the fastest of the young monkeys, and before they knew it he was out of their sight. ...But the other three were really, really bad at this. A particularly burly monkey stayed by their side and coached them diligently as if he were teaching very young and inexperienced little monkeys, but the going was very slow, and very fearful. Even mama monkeys with baby monkeys clinging to their bellies leisurely passed right on by.

The monkeys watched over and encouraged them, acting as supportive, living crutches for them when needed. In places where they couldn't bring themselves to jump, the monkeys held each other's hands and created bridges with their own furry bodies, which the three of them clung to with their eyes shut tight. When they finally made it to the edge of the forest, Ness, Jeff, and Paula were all completely drenched in sweat, and they were totally worn out and exhausted. Their arms and legs were trembling, and their hearts felt as though they might burst. Their vision was hazy, and at first they had a hard time focusing on what was in front of them, but...

“...It's a mountain range!”

...As soon as they'd caught their breath, they could finally see the vast and incredibly gorgeous landscape spreading out before them. There were many red, rocky mountains layered one over another in rows, with their peaks leveled out as flat as tabletops. There were ravines filled with mist and lingering fog. Shining lakes that looked like mirrors set into the ground. In the distance, there was a mountain shaped like an upside-down mortar, with very pale smoke billowing from the top of it. Clouds that looked like wisps of shredded cotton candy glimmered in a dazzling shade of white across the perfectly clear blue sky.

It looks just like a western movie set! Paula mused, while Jeff thought, It's like a giant dinosaur exhibit!

Whoa, those clouds look just like King's fur! thought Ness. Every once in a while they'd take a brush to that old dog King, and he'd shed piles and piles of light, white, fluffy undercoat fur. These clouds reminded him of times when he'd watched that light, fluffy fur billow across the grainy wood of the floor.

Somewhat suddenly, he found himself missing his home in Onett. How were his mama and Tracy doing, he wondered?

So long as he resisted pulling himself back to reality with thoughts like those, all of this seemed like some sort of dream. This was a solemn, peaceful, and truly magnificent image of a primeval land–the ancient earth.

For a short while, the three of them gazed out in amazement.

“KII-KIII!”

One of the monkeys pulled at Ness's hand, as if urging him to hurry.

“Ah, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm going!”

There was a beautiful plateau of red rock, with horizontal stripes of sedimentary layers which made it look like an incredibly large agate stone. Compared to traversing treetops, mountain climbing was a breeze. Soon enough, they had regained their high spirits, and they climbed along behind the monkeys until finally they came to a cliff face so sheer it looked as though it had been sliced cleanly with a knife.

“...Oh, whoa!”

Neatly chiseled here and there into the cliff face, there were holes that appeared to be windows. It looked like a giant apartment building. And in several of the holes there were little faces, each peeking out at Ness and his friends.

“...Are they...some sort of cave-dwellers?” Jeff wondered excitedly, as he pulled out a pair of binoculars.

“Oh, there's Poo,” said Paula. “Poo!” She gave him a huge wave.

Come on, come on! the monkeys seemed to say as they pulled them onward, and Ness and his friends entered this mysterious cliff-side home at last.

The insides of the cliff face were hollowed out like the complex tunnels of an anthill. They were somewhat similar to those ruins that had been left by the ancient people of Scaraba, but these dwellings were simple, and seemed to have been built with more peaceful intentions.

These passageways were far too beautiful to be called “primitive”, though. The floors were perfectly level, and the ceilings had a consistent and gentle curve to them. Here and there on the perfectly perpendicular walls, there were windows which opened up to the outside to let in sunlight, and even all of these had perfectly straight bottoms and beautiful arches on the top. There were no power shovels or backhoes to be seen, or even an outlet to plug in an electric drill, so they wondered how on earth anyone had ever managed to hollow this cliff out so deeply. How many hundreds of people did it take to carve this out by hand, over how many dozens of years...how many hundreds of years?

Eventually the corridor opened up into an especially large room. And there was Poo, along with a gathering of very small people whose heads were shaped a bit like chestnuts, tapered to a gentle point at the very top. Men and women both wore the same simple tunics spun from what looked like fibers of tree bark, and their glossy, black hair, which shined as though it were wet, hung down to the shoulders on some, or was tied up at the back on others. None of them had any facial hair. They were all barefoot, and had very well-developed muscles.

Among them, there was one individual who appeared to be elderly, and he was wearing what looked like a string of animal bones around his neck. But, on second thought...the wrinkles on his sunburned face may have suggested that he was advanced in age, but although his hair was a little thin and dry, it was still an elegant black color, and his back was also taut and straight. It was his facial expression, overflowing with dignity, that made one believe that he had the status of an Elder.

“Uhm...hello,” said Ness, as he walked over and stood before this dignified fellow. He took off his hat and gave a very friendly smile. “We're sorry to intrude like this.”

He made sure to speak in a very polite way because, for some reason, he had a feeling these people were the masters of this Deep Darkness.

The Maybe-Elder gave him a curt little nod, but didn't reply. The glint in his eye was piercing, and his lips were drawn into a straight line. He appeared to be somewhat angry.

Oh, no...Ness thought. ...What if it was a bad thing that we destroyed that rafflesia flower? What if it was like, their precious bonsai, or something?

Then, the Perhaps-Elder looked Poo in the eyes and...did he grin?

W...what the?!

The Probably-Elder beckoned two younger individuals to his side, and he held hands with them. The three of them seemed to become one, and in that moment...

[Welcome, Ness. We are the Tenda.]

...A solemn voice...no, a thought that felt like a voice, rang clearly and sharply through Ness's mind...!

[I am not angry, not at all. We Tenda are very quiet. We do not use a language of sounds.]

“It's telepathy!” said Paula, excitedly. “These people send their thoughts out using telepathy!”

“Oh, what? No way!” cried Jeff. With a look of misery on his face, he put his hands to his ears. “I'm not getting anything. I can't follow along!”

Then, without the Possibly-Elder saying a word, two more came forward, stood on either side of the group, and added to the chain of Tenda holding hands. Now there were five in all.

[One who wears rings of ice before his eyes...how about now–you can hear us now, can you not?]

“Oh, I can, I can, I can!” Jeff cried, happily. “Whoa, I can hear you so well! I understand you perfectly! This is just amazing...wow!”

“These people can amplify their PSI just by holding hands,” Paula murmured.

[That's right. Strangers cannot hear the voices of our hearts so well. As we are all companions here, we can communicate even through simple whispers. The Kumari Prince can hear these whispers, as well.]

“...Then Poo's psychic powers must be really strong, huh,” Ness mused, with a hint of jealousy.

[First, I shall tell you about the Tenda tribe. Will you hear me out?]

“Oh, yes, tell us, tell us!”

Some very young Tenda came around with some kind of tea which had a wonderful aroma. They all sat down on a carpet woven from blades of grass, and everyone listened as the Likely-Elder–ah, no, thanks to the power of telepathy, they now knew for sure that this guy was the real deal–the Definitely-Elder told them a story without any words.

In the Tenda tribe, where everyone had the ability to use telepathy, and where they did not have conversations in the typical way, they did not lie. The concept of a lie had never occurred to them.

From many tens of thousands of years in the past, they had spread almost entirely throughout this jungle known as the Deep Darkness, leading their quiet, peaceful lives. They had a very gentle, very beautiful way of living, at peace with the earth and given strength by the rain and the sun. However, one day, invaders from another tribe appeared–a gang who constantly bellowed and complained loudly–and these invaders tried to take the Tenda's forest home away from them.

Even though the Tenda did not like to fight, they couldn't simply let themselves be chased from their homes. They had no choice but to try to learn their enemy's language. But because they first had to learn how to speak out loud, this was terribly, terribly difficult. The Tenda even snored telepathically!

But, well, once they were all able to understand one another, the Tenda suggested that they talk things out peacefully and try to find a solution that would respectfully protect the interests of both groups. They figured this was what intelligent tribes were supposed to do. Their enemies nodded in what seemed like agreement. “Of course we accept,” is what they said. But, this was a bald-faced lie. They spoke in sweet words, and wore smiles on their faces as they vowed to be good friends, but in their minds, they thought things like, “Eee-hee-hee, just you wait and see–we're going to destroy all of you half-wits in no time!” Attacking, kicking, beating, plundering... They imagined vivid scenes of pure violence, and even seemed to be looking forward to it!

Oh, by the way, the Tenda's power to project thoughts, or in other words, to use telepathy, is actually not very strong. They don't need it to be. In order to transmit their feelings to someone with very weak PSI abilities, they need to combine with one another, as they had done just now, but when they were among their companions, their feeble psychic energy worked well enough. Their ability to read thoughts, however, was far more developed.

Think of it like a set of cheap walkie-talkies. As long as the batteries are fresh and the devices are close enough, two people can hear one another just fine. But if one of you leaves the room, or the weather is damp and cloudy, or the conditions are somewhat unfavorable, suddenly the reception goes bad. The transceivers used by the police and the military, or those cell phones that have been all the rage lately, or, of course, the special radio wave transmitters at broadcasting stations...they don't have this problem. Has the cordless phone in your apartment ever gotten its line crossed with the one belonging to the family next door? Or have you ever been tuning through stations on the radio, and found a broadcast that wasn't listed on the program guide? To put it simply, all of these things happen because the device on the broadcasting end wants to make absolutely sure that the message will get through, so it sends out a signal that is far stronger than it needs to be.

The Tenda were all telepathists with incredibly sensitive powers of reception. The Tenda found it too loud and irritating if a mind's “voice” was too strong, much like when someone yells too close to your ear and makes your eardrums throb. As a matter of fact, because the sensitivities of other humanoid species are so weak, they are typically unable to hear the “whispers” that the Tenda send out, of course, but they also seem to be unaware of the telepathy-like manifestations of their own emotional outbursts, or in other words, the shouting of their own minds. And because they are not even aware of it, they are also unable to suppress it. Because they have no ability to control it, very often its intensity crosses over into the danger zone.

All thought involves telepathy. However, when it comes to human beings, who have very weak telepathic reception, thoughts are so insignificant that they go unnoticed.

And so, of course, their violence-loving enemies had absolutely no idea that their nasty thoughts were being overheard by the Tenda. If they had known, they surely would have flown into even more of a rage. And the Tenda were terribly shocked–they felt as though they had been slapped right in the face.

Before the war had even begun, the Tenda gave up the fight. In a battle between brutes who not only had no qualms about causing pain but also seemed to enjoy doing it, and a tribe who could feel the suffering of others as if it were their own...the eventual outcome was clear enough from the very beginning.

It broke their hearts to do so, but the Tenda fled. They were forced to leave their forests and go into hiding. Their enemies, whipped into a frenzy and thirsting for battle but having no foe upon whom to take out their fury, searched desperately for the Tenda, but it is impossible to outwit telepathists. Impatient, irritated, and furious, even their smallest quarrels became massive feuds, and eventually the brutes began to fight with and kill one another, instead. Hundreds of lives were lost, for absolutely no reason at all. Hundreds of children lost their parents, hundreds of wives lost their husbands, and hundreds of parents lost their children.

The forest was filled with cries of hatred, of sorrow, and of despair. The gentle-hearted Tenda were so greatly affected by it all that they fell into a deepening depression, until, in the end, they felt nothing but emptiness. They became more and more clever when it came to remaining hidden. They vowed never to let themselves get involved with anyone else, ever again. And never again would they allow themselves to be found, either.

[This was a long time ago, and since then, this great earth has revolved around the heavenly fire three thousand times,] said the Elder, and in his heart he heaved a pained sigh. [That was the time of the ancestors of the ancestors of our ancestors, and then many generations before them. But, the Tenda tribe did not forget. The souls of the ancient Tenda all live on in the Tenda of today.]

“...It's all too much...the poor things!” cried Paula, as she wiped her cheek with her sleeve. “The Tenda have such unbelievably pure and beautiful hearts, don't they?”

“...So, if all of you can see into each other's emotions and feelings,” Jeff began, thoughtfully, “then it follows that if someone were to have even the slightest bit of evil in their hearts, they wouldn't be able to adapt too well. From the moment you're born, you're raised in an environment where caring for others comes naturally, so then, naturally, everyone will turn out to be a caring individual. Anyone unfortunate enough to have been born a 'bad seed' would have had all those negative traits weeded out over these long years, I suppose.”

“And yet,” Poo added, “these days, even among the Tenda tribe, I assume malicious thoughts have been lurking to an unusually strong degree. ...Isn't that right?”

[Indeed,] replied the Elder. [We are not without negative feelings. For example, we feel jealousy. We suffer laziness. We are not without small fits of anger. But under normal circumstances, feelings such as those are sealed away and made to vanish before they have a chance to grow very large.

Envy, in another light, can be seen as respect or admiration for another person, and laziness is only proof that every one of us can be weak, sometimes. Irritability is nothing but a sign that somehow, without realizing it, one has pushed themselves too hard.

When you are injured, you bleed or feel pain, and when you eat something you should not, your stomach aches and you lose your usual strength. The heart, too, can suffer similar afflictions. Negative feelings are like little colds that your heart can catch, this is true, but...lately, we suffer more and more from meaningless desires, wishes for impossible dreams, things we long for which we should not, and covetous hearts. If one of us is troubled, we are all troubled. At this rate, we, the Tenda, shall all soon perish.]

“Did you say 'desires'?” asked Ness. “You said that you find yourselves wanting things that you shouldn't want? Oh, it sounds like...maybe...that could be something caused by the Evil Mani Mani statue!”

[A metal boat came flying in, from the eastern sky,] the Elder replied, with a nod. [The spinning wings, they stopped, and two beings sank into the forest. Ever since then...the moon has hidden the sun, and midday has become as night. An evil darkness covers the forests and fills the sky.]

“Two beings...that must be Pokey and Aloysius!” Ness cried, as he balled his fist. “Has anyone here seen these people? Do you recognize their faces?”

Oh, I'm sorry...I should have mentioned this earlier–because the Tenda tribe's telepathy is different from language, it can also transmit perfect images. For the convenience of this novel, I have written about these things only in terms of language, but please understand that at the same time, they were also transmitting very definite visuals and mental images, one after another. ...I just wanted to take a moment to make that clear.

[Their faces, I do not know,] said the Elder. [But, this was seen by one of our companions while they were out fishing.]

The Elder then transmitted a set of images.

There was no other way to describe the scene.

It was the bank of a river the color of milk-coffee. At the water's edge, there was a small, dilapidated hut. The wreckage of a helicopter could be seen in the distance. And behind the hut, off to one side of a patch of flat, even ground...there was a very sloppily constructed cross.

On top of a soft mound of earth, there was a bent steel plate which appeared to be a part from the wrecked helicopter. Words had been scratched into the steel plate with something like a nail.

ALOYSIUS MINCH

1943~1994

SEE YOU IN HELL

YOU SCRAWNY GREEDY BASTARD!

“...A grave?” Ness muttered, as the blood drained from his face. “Mister Minch...has passed away? ...How? Don't tell me it...don't tell me it was Pokey! Has he gone so crazy he'd put his hands on his own father that way...?”

“...No...I can sense their residual thoughts,” Poo replied, his eyes half-closed. “His death was caused by starvation.”

“He starved to death?” said Ness. “But...why? And where did Pokey go?”

[Toward the source of all the evil, the rift in time,] replied the Elder, and Ness gasped.

“The rift in time! We have to get there, as soon as we can!”

[It is not far,] said the Elder, and his soothing telepathic thoughts gently eased Ness's fretful heart. [But, there is still more that you must do. Visit our temple, and listen to the words of our god, the shining stone. It is a brother to the Sound stone which you possess.]

“Oh!”

Ness fumbled around in his pocket, and pulled out the Sound stone.

The stone which had already recorded so many melodies.

In Onett they found the Giant Step, and in Saturn Valley the Milky Well. They had used the Alien Detector in Jeff's watch to discover suspicious spots in places they'd already gone through, and they took several Sanctuaries back one after another. They had only very recently taken back the Pink Cloud in the mountains of Poo's homeland, Dalaam.

“Two...three...four,” Ness counted. “...The next one will be our seventh power spot! But where the heck could it be?!”

[It is in the depths of the depths,] the Elder replied. [Within the cave of the luminous moss.] A veil of sadness seemed to drape across the Elder's heart. [We have become aware all too late that a creature whose heart cannot be read has taken up residence there. We do not enjoy conflict. But it has taken our temple, and we are quite troubled. We would like to be with our god. But, if we were to go there, we would only be hurt. We do not wish for that creature to be there, anymore. We want it to depart peacefully, if that is at all possible.]

“Just leave it to us!” said Ness, as he thumped his chest. “...But, the monsters that absorb the power from My Sanctuaries usually tend to be pretty tough...so I'm not sure if we can do this peacefully. And if we can't, I'm sorry...I'm really sorry in advance!”

Hurry, hurry! With the guidance of some of the young Tenda, Ness and his friends were hurried along the stone corridor to the farthest room. There, guarding Ness's seventh Sanctuary, was a bizarre monster that looked like a lightning bolt that had solidified into a suit of metal armor. Jeff's analysis was that it was a creature from some other planet, or in other words, an alien. According to the introduction the creature itself gave, it was called something like the 'Electro Specter'!

Dear reader, do you remember hearing this name before, somewhere? That's right! That's the creature Pokey chose from that catalog the Super Starman showed him! So in short, he's been selecting and ordering various monsters and having them sent out in an attempt to stop Ness's progress. But where do they come from, you ask? Well, now, that I still don't know. We'll just have to wait and see...

Now then, the Electro Specter's battle strategy was to use paralyzing electric attacks that drained them of their HP. It also fired off rockets, and it had something like Paula's special barrier, a Power Shield, that could reflect their own PSI back at them! However...

“Counter shield!”

“Get 'em, Hungry HP Sucker!”

“PSI Starstorm!”

“Explosive Rockin' Line-Drive-Shot!”

...In the end, their enemy was no more.

That hard-working Electro Specter vanished into a rainbow-colored beam of light, as aliens tend to do, and the dazzling glow that had been protecting the power spot became even brighter. Then, giant, illuminated letters began to appear on the walls surrounding them.

[I'm Ness... It's been a long road getting here...]

Whoa, what is this?! Ness thought, in amazement.

[Whoa, what is this?!] the letters spelled out.

My thoughts are being written out on the wall!

[My thoughts are being written out on the wall!]

“No, don't look!” cried Paula. Her face suddenly turned bright red, and she pounded Ness on the shoulder. “Don't, don't! Turn away, what if it's something I don't want you to see?!”

“What do you mean?” Ness asked, dumbfounded, as the letters spelled out, [What do you mean?]. “I should be the one getting upset. Why are you so flustered, Paula?”

“Huh? Because...” Paula began, her eyes open wide in confusion. “Because...those are my thoughts up there, aren't they? What do you mean, you should be the one getting upset?”

“I've got it!” said Jeff, as he suddenly clapped his hands together. “For me, I see my thought process, and it looks like a flow chart flying by at an incredible speed. I think it's just like that for each one of us. We're being shown a glimpse into our own minds!”

“Oooh, I see!”

“Is that so,” said Poo. “Well then, as I would expect, my mind projects not a single word.”

For a short while, the four of them said nothing, and they gazed at the glowing letters being projected onto the walls.

That's right–this place was the source of the Tenda's power to read minds. A place where one must face their own thoughts, laid bare.

I bet the world is still hiding many wonders just like this, out there somewhere, Ness thought, and he followed his own thoughts with his eyes. I'll never give up on this wonderful world...our home. No matter what happens, I'm going to protect it...!

It was nothing more than an honest thought, a very sincere wish, but seeing it lit up so brightly, and in letters the height of your average human being, it made Ness feel a little bashful.

...Heh...please stop that now, you don't have to go all out like that, he thought. Hey, at ease, at ease!

And so, Ness had reclaimed his seventh Sanctuary. The Sound stone recorded the melody of Lumine Hall. Suddenly, on the wall before him, Ness saw a vision of himself as a baby, being held by his father. This image in lights was so much like his real father that it took him by surprise. As the image of his father smiled an immeasurably tender smile, the vision slowly began to fade until finally it vanished.

All at once the light grew dim, and though it was subtle, its hue began to change.

[Thank you, Ness! Paula! Jeff! And Poo!]

“Oh, it's the Elder!”

“Ahh, this time we're all seeing the same thing, I think!”

[You have purified our god's dwelling. Our hearts are at ease. We have sympathy for the strange being that had been used as a pawn for evil, and which has been driven away at last. ...Now then, I have something to show you. The rift in time is just ahead. The thirty-thousand Tenda of our tribe will now concentrate our thoughts, all together. We will open the door. You must go.]

WHOOOOOOSH!

“Uwaaugh!”

The entire wall flashed with a light so strong they couldn't even bear to look at it. Ness and his friends watched, through their minds' eyes, as all of the Tenda held hands with one another and concentrated their thoughts together into one divine, solemn force.

[Open...]

The hearts of thirty thousand Tenda spoke quietly...gently.

[Open...the door...!]

A vertical line appeared right down the middle of the wall of light, as if it had been quickly drawn there with a pencil. Then, both the left and the right sides began to give way, slowly and silently. Larger and more wonderful than the gates of any castle...the door was opening...!

To their eyes, which had just been flooded by that overwhelming light, this new world appeared to be nothing but darkness at first.

Hot, humid, muggy air blew in from beyond the door. There was a smell just like boiled eggs–the smell of sulfur.

Stepping forward timidly and rubbing their eyelids, their eyes adjusted gradually and their sight returned. The land spreading before them was tinged with red, and the ground was rough and covered in rocks and boulders. And those orange rivers tumbling along here and there...was that lava?! It looked a lot like the world above...except that there was an exceptionally large range of volcanoes! And there was no sky. Instead, there was a rocky ceiling, even higher than the tallest skyscrapers they'd ever seen, and it was flickering with bright flashes of deep red and appeared to be as hot as embers.

“...It's...it's a whole continent in the depths of the earth!” Jeff cried, with sheer excitement in his voice. “Now I'm sure of it. ...The relative density of this planet we call earth has always been atypical. The theoretical calculations somehow don't add up just right. The commonly accepted structure of the core and its magma doesn't perfectly explain the earth's rotation and revolution, the movements of the moon, or the global currents and tides. Even when we think of it on a cosmic scale, we keep running into anomalies in the distribution of volume of the various elements here on earth, but...oh, I can't believe it! I just can't believe there's this much space under the earth's crust!”

“...And I can't believe I'm seeing this with my own eyes!” said Paula, nodding in agreement.

“There are many ancient legends about this,” said Poo. “...About another land, within the depths of the earth. Perhaps there are entrances to this place all throughout the world.”

“Well, anyway, let's go!” cried Ness, as he fixed his baseball cap. “...To that rift in time!”

“But, how are we supposed to get there?” Paula replied. “We don't even have a map or anything. And this is a really huge place to be trying to search through blindly.”

“We may have a guide,” said Poo. “None other than the very source of all this evil is already heading toward the place we seek.”

“Jeff!”

“Yes, yes, I'm checking!” cried Jeff, as he looked at his watch. “Alien signs: Positive! Two o' Clock. Distance, about 2 miles!”

“Alriiight!”

The four of them began walking briskly through that world in the depths of the earth, where burning winds whirled in cyclones. The ground nearly melted the soles of their shoes. Heat haze rose and shimmered, distorting the distant scenery. There was a constant, low vibration running through the earth like an old refrigerator, and every once in a while there would be a more violent trembling. There was about one earthquake per minute, and one out of every ten earthquakes was so strong they had to stop walking! Each time this happened, mountains and boulders would rattle and roar as they crumbled. Fissures ran along the ground, overflowing with lava. Ness and his friends tried to walk only in the relatively solid areas, but here and there, every now and then, holes would open up in the ground like antlion dens, and–WWHHOOOSHH!–columns of steam would shoot up out of them. These were bursts of the magma's breath...and it was thousands of degrees too hot!

“...Pheww, it's like a sauna out here!” Paula mumbled, drowsily. “I wonder if this'll help me lose weight...”

“Be careful. If you step on one of these steam vents, you're going to get scalded!”

They thought that the heat felt nice, warming their stiffened muscles and easing their tension...but only for the first few minutes. By now, they were completely covered in sweat and their clothes clung to their bodies, making it very difficult to move. Beads of sweat forming in their hair and on their faces trickled down in streams and dripped from their chins.

Ness had rolled his T-shirt up to his armpits. He was worried that if he took it off completely, he would be in danger if any debris from the active volcanoes flew their way. Paula looked at him quite enviously, but of course, she left her clothes just as they were. Even Jeff, who always had his collar perfectly fastened all the way up to his throat, had loosened his necktie and undone one button. Then, in the end, he had taken off his white dress shirt, folded it neatly and put it into his backpack. Now he was wearing a tank top none of them had ever seen him wear before. And what's more, he even untucked the hem of the tank top from his pants! And on that hem, written in neat magic marker, it said, “Fourth Year–Group D–Jeff A.”

“If you extinguish all thought from your mind...even flames will feel cool...cool as so many cucumbers,” mumbled Poo. Perhaps as a result of his extensive spiritual training, he hadn't broken a sweat, but by now, even the ever-steady Poo was muttering overheated nonsense.

“Ugh...my throat...is so dry,” Jeff mumbled, haltingly.

“All I want is some ice cream,” Paula replied, without hesitation. “Rum raisin, and mint chocolate chip!”

“When your throat is this dry, plain ice is even better,” said Ness. “Under the blazing sun in a sweltering baseball stadium, there's nothing better than chugging down a cup of shaved ice. I really wish we had some right now...”

“Fresh water is the best,” said Poo, very frankly. “From a well-refined stream deep in the heart of the mountains...it's like sweet nectar.”

“Have you ever been to the Stoic Club? They feel the same way over there.”

“Where on earth is that?”

“Ahh, Summers! What I'd give to dive into that beautiful ocean right now!”

The four of them couldn't help but chatter idly, because they knew if they didn't, they would probably pass out. Unable to properly regulate their body heat, their heads were hazy and their hearts hammered away. Their muscles were tense, their bones seemed to creak, and of course, their footsteps had become very heavy.

“...Hey...are we almost there...? Almost at the rift in time...?”

“Yeah,” said Jeff. “According to the readings, we should be there soon, but...hm?” Adjusting his glasses, which had slipped down his nose due to all the sweating, Jeff looked down at his watch, and was the first among them to notice it. “Wh...what is that, that vibration?!”

Thud, thud, thud......THUUUUDDDDD!

“Waaaagh!”

“It's a giant monster...! ...No, it's...a dinosaur!”

And so it was! As it appeared from behind a massive boulder ahead of them, stomping its heavy feet, they could only look up in awe at a creature they had believed to be extinct. It was yellow with red spots, and had a long neck, an even longer tail, a belly as round as a grapefruit, and something like armor plating along its back. On top of all of that, it had two enormous eyes that were way too far apart from one another!

“Hee! It's a real dinosaur! This is awesome!” Ness cried excitedly, in just the way one might expect that a little boy would.

“...Uhh, uhm...that bone structure, the features on its face,” Jeff mumbled, as he hurriedly accessed the encyclopedia-slash-dictionary in his electronic organizer. “That's most likely a Wetnosaurus Paullumpopularis!”

Whoosh! Suddenly that tail sliced through the air and grazed the tops of their heads. Thud, slam! Those truck-sized feet came stomping right for them!

“It lived in the later half of the Cilcilan period,” Jeff continued, “and is estimated to have weighed twenty three tons!”

“Yikes! ...Hey, Jeff, tell us! D-d-does this thing eat meat? ...Or plants?” asked Paula, as she ran for her life.

“Hmm...from the shape of its lower mandible, it appears as though it should be a docile herbivore, but... Ugh, damn it! Ness, I'm so sorry! The alien presence my watch detected earlier wasn't Pokey. ...It was this guy!”

“Then, this guy is an alien, too?” Ness replied. “...Is someone controlling it?”

Graaw! The Wetnosaur bellowed furiously, then it charged forward with its neck outstretched, biting at them as they fled!

“...Alright,” said Ness. “Unfortunately that means we can't show any mercy... Go, PSI Rockin'––w-w-w-whoooaa!” The Wetnosaur swiped at Ness with its forelegs and he leapt to the side. “Damn, this guy's so big there's no way to keep any distance between us!”

“Great one...we are not your enemies,” Poo began, “and you are not where you belong. Return to where you ought to be, return to your home.” He had climbed to the top of a tall boulder and was sagely attempting to persuade the beast as he performed mudras. The Wetnosaur cocked its little head...I mean, its big head, and seemed to be listening to Poo's words. “Let's just shut our eyes, now...and have pleasant dreams–wha-?!”

Ka-craaash! Suddenly the Wetnosaur flew into a rage, and it lunged for him with its horned nose! Poo leapt out of the way with the reflexes of a cat, but the boulder he had been standing on was smashed to pieces.

“I guess you don't want to think about sleep when it's so hot out, huh?” said Poo. He whirled through the air and alighted gently, then he brought his hands together as if in prayer. “I'm very sorry. Forgive me.”

“Yaah! Take this! Firing missiles!” cried Jeff, and he did just that. But...whing, whaam! The Wetnosaur simply brushed them away with its powerful tail. “It's no use! Without a tank or something we don't stand a chance! ...But, why didn't the Tenda tribe warn us that there were such dangerous creatures prowling around down here?”

“Maybe they just didn't know?” Ness suggested, while doing his best to keep away from their opponent, who was smashing into boulders left and right. “It probably wasn't here before. I'm pretty sure it was only put here to get in our way.”

“...I feel so bad for it,” said Paula.

“But if that's the case,” Ness went on, “then there's no reason for us to fight this guy. This poor thing is a victim, too, brought here against its will! There must be a Mani Mani statue around here somewhere. We just need to destroy it!”

“You might be right,” said Jeff. “But, where the heck could it be?”

“Hmmmm...”

“We don't have much time to think about this!” Paula cried. “If we don't find a way to fight that thing, we're all going to be stomped flat! ...YIKES! See, look, what did I tell you?! Now there are two of them!”

The newcomer was a dinosaur two times larger than the Wetnosaur. It was also a terribly welcome color in such a hot climate, as it was the cool and refreshing hue of a blue summer sky, and the tips of all four of its limbs were white, as if it were wearing stockings! Its coloring may have looked something like a fashionable school uniform for girls, but the glare in its eyes was nothing short of sinister. It held its head low as it crouched in a terribly threatening way, as if it planned to charge and gore them.

“That's a Chomposaurus Saccusoccus! It's an obligate carnivore. It lived from the Zabon period to the Dobon period. Its estimated weight is sixty three and a half tons!” Jeff cried in despair.

“And I'm sure its temperament is violent and merciless,” said Poo, jumping aside nimbly.

“This isn't a monster encyclopedia or anything like that,” Jeff replied, “so it doesn't list that kind of info–waah!”

As if it had heard Poo's slander, the Chomposaur suddenly blew fire at them! Whoosh! The four of them quickly dove out of the fire's devastating range.

“Well, it may be a carnivore, but I guess it's not fond of raw meat.”

“This is absurd!” Jeff shouted incredulously, shaking embers from his tank top and exposing his cute little belly button. “I've never heard of a dinosaur with flame-throwing abilities before!”

“Those nasty aliens probably made some modifications,” Ness replied very seriously, as he ran at full tilt.

“It's like something out of a Japanese monster movie!”

“Well if the monsters are real, then that Ultra-whoever hero guy should show up soon, too, right?” Poo replied. ...Wait, since when does Poo watch TV?!

After failing to burn the four of them to a crisp, the Chomposaur swung its tail angrily. ...And it slammed right into the side of the Wetnosaur's head as it hastily stomped its way over!

[Oh, why did you do that, you brute?!] cried the Wetnosaur, who had been knocked onto its side. ...Apparently, it was female.

[It only happened because you're so damn slow!] the Chomposaur roared, as smoke curled from its nostrils.

[It was all your fault!] the Wetnosaur sobbed, as tears formed in its wide-set eyes.

[Damn it, I know...I'm sorry.]

[What's with your attitude, lately?]

[Don't worry about it now, just...come on, get up!]

While the two giant monsters were busy bickering, Ness and his friends quickly dashed over to a narrow gap in a cliff wall. Poo swiftly climbed up through the gap by jumping in light zig-zags, kicking off from one incredibly slight foothold to the next. “Hey, follow me–and hurry!” he yelled down from the top of the tall cliff.

“We can't do all that ninja stuff you just did!”

“Wait a sec,” said Jeff. “...Here, use this!” He took out a well-wound spool of electrical cord, and with a frantic whiirrrr!, he unraveled it and tossed the spool end to Poo. His control was remarkable.

Poo caught it effortlessly. He wrapped the cord around himself and got into position. “Ready!” he shouted.

“Climb up, climb up!”

“Paula, you go first! You can use me as a step-stool.”

“Oh, no way–I'm wearing a skirt, so I go last!”

“Stop being ridiculous, just go!”

“Waahhh!”

Tucking her skirt into the bottom hems of her underwear, which made it look like she was wearing a pair of bloomers, Paula took hold of the electrical cord and quickly climbed up the cliff. Jeff went next. Because his legs had been so weak for such a long time, his arms were surprisingly strong. In places without enough footing, he would kick at the rocky wall, forcefully creating large holes.

“Whoa...how are you doing that?” asked Paula. “Are your boots made of metal or something?”

“...Or something,” Jeff replied as he made his way to the top and grinned at her. “Ness, hurry!”

“Yeah, I'm coming!”

With no one there to be a step-stool for him, Ness took a running start and jumped. He followed in the footholds that Jeff had made, and he climbed steadily.

The Wetnosaur and Chomposaur finally hurried over, and they stomped their feet in frustration. They were too heavy to climb the cliff, and the gap was too narrow for them to squeeze into. They reached in and clawed around, they rammed their bodies against the cliff, and they roared in aggravation, but eventually they gave up and ran off. They seemed to be looking for an easier way to climb up from another side.

“Now's our chance!”

“Yeah. We should run as far away from here as we can!”

“Hmm? Look at that!”

“Huh? W...w...what is that?!”

For the first time since they'd arrived at the top of the cliff, they turned and looked at what was behind them. They could see a long stretch of cooled, jet-black lava that looked something like a giant's stockpile of used coffee grounds. And right in the middle of that, sticking straight up and towering high above them, was a mysterious, silver, rectangular object, clearly made by human (or similar) hands!

Quickly forgetting anything they'd said about running away, the four of them approached the object. It was about as tall as a three-story house. It was about as wide as a two-lane road. But in spite of all that, it was scarcely three feet deep. And to top it all off, the middle was completely empty, so they could clearly see all of the scenery beyond it. They tried throwing a stone, and sure enough, it went right through.

It looked like a very thin doorframe–minus the door.

“Maybe it's like...a multi-dimensional gate, or something,” said Jeff, and he began investigating immediately. There was a metal panel near the bottom of the frame. He removed its screws with a power drill, revealing a strange, transparent lump of something like crystal or plastic, several planks of wood, and something that looked like tangled blades of grass.

“What is it?”

“Does it make any sense to you?”

“Yeah...I think. ...It's surprisingly simple,” said Jeff, as he gave the wiring a quick look-over. “Ugh, this soldering is terrible, and the screws are all stripped. What a clumsy job... Whoever put this together was an amateur. It feels like this was a store-bought unit they put together with one hand, while holding the manual in the other.”

“That's amazing,” said Poo, as he looked at Jeff with uncharacteristic surprise. “Can you really understand a machine like this one just by looking at it?”

“Totally,” Jeff replied with a shrug, and then he smiled gently. “I think this crystal is an integrated circuit. This stuff here, that looks like dried up old string...that must be the wiring. Of course, I don't know anything about the components, or the principles behind them. ...But the laws of physics are the same all across the universe, so all intelligent life must behave similarly...or at least, that's what I think.”

BANG, BANG, BANGG! THUD-THUD, THUD, WHAM!

From beneath the side of the cliff, first there came a foreleg, and then a back leg! Whoosh! A head appeared, and it was staring right at them! Its massive eyeballs glared fiercely.

“Wah, they're coming up!”

“They found us!”

“Hyaaaah, take this–PSI Thunder!”

“PSI Starstorm!”

Graaaww! Rooooaaar! In an attempt to avoid the attacks of Ness and his friends, the monsters ducked their heads and let go of the cliff. As soon as they did, they slipped back down, bellowing pitifully. Apparently, since the newly hardened lava was so terribly brittle, they weren't able to find any proper footholds.

“Hmmm...well, I guess it's all or nothing!” Jeff muttered. He pulled out a box cutter and hacked away at all that strange wiring. He flipped that crystal-like object over and put it back in upside down. He twisted some of that tangled grass into place. “Oh, damn, I have nothing to solder it with. ...Heey, well, how about this?!” he cried, with the strange intonation of a lady working at a bargain-bin electric supply shop, as he rooted through his backpack and found a piece of chewing gum. He tossed it into his mouth, and began to chew on it with a terrible urgency.

And while all this was going on...

“What do you think, did they give up?”

“...Nope.”

...Ness and the other two had crept over to the cliff's edge, and they were cautiously peeking down to see what those dinosaurs were up to.

The Chomposaur was clinging tightly to a small boulder in the cliffside with one of its forelegs, digging its nails in as hard as it could. Amazingly, its other foreleg was wrapped around that of the Wetnosaur, which had lost its footing and was in danger of plummeting into the valley below.

The Chomposaur out a loud GWOOAARR! as it strained and tried to pull itself up, and the Wetnosaur immediately answered with an encouraging GWAAROOH! It seemed they were psyching each other up and that each was urging the other on.

“Hey. What if we tried tickling the leg it's holding on with?”

“I don't want to do something that mean...”

“Senseless murder defiles the soul.”

“Hey, you guys, I think everything's ready. Come back over here!” Jeff cried. Using his thoroughly chewed and gooey gum, he connected the wiring to where it had once been screwed down, then he hastily replaced the panel door. He clasped his hands together and knelt down, praying to that sky which wasn't quite a sky. “Oh, God, Bohr, Einstein, Hawking, Maxwell...and of course, my own father! Please, oh please let this work...!”

Ness, Paula, and Poo ran over and joined Jeff as he got into position on one side of the gate.

Back on the opposite side, that hard-working dinosaur team had just made it to the top of the cliff, panting heavily and with their shoulders heaving as they tried to catch their breath.

[You really held your ground,] said the Chomposaur, as its ferocious eyes reeled in a very comical way.

[...And you were really looking out for me,] the Wetnosaur replied, its cheeks turning bright red.

They made a wonderful team, apparently. After all, even though one was a predator and the other would normally have been its prey, they shared the same misfortune of being forcefully recruited and sent here by Pokey's underling, that half-witted Super Starman. They say folks who share the same misery form strong bonds, or that a close stranger can sometimes mean more than a distant relative. Let's say there's a friend who you don't really like all that much, but you happen to run into them while you're on a trip overseas, and the next thing you know you're having tea with them–I guess you could say it feels something like that.

Before they knew it, the Chomposaur and the Wetnosaur had their arms wrapped around one another, their tails intertwined, and their noses pressed together as they gazed dreamily into each other's eyes. But then...

“Heeey, what gives?”

“Have they given up already?”

“They're probably all worn out.”

“If you've had enough, come on over here!”

It was those fidgety, detestable children, and they were hopping and stomping and yelling. One of them even turned around and–spank, spank!–whacked his own backside, in a very rude gesture.

[Damn youuuu!]

[Wh...why you cheeky little mammals...you're gonna regret making fun of meeee!]

Thud-thud-thud! Stomp-stomp–STOMP! The Wetnosaur lunged, and the Chomposaur followed right after it. Digging their claws into the ground and throwing dust into the air as they came, the heavy footfalls were deafening as the two humongous dinosaurs rushed at Ness and his friends, full of rage!

“...W-w-w-w-will we r-r-r-r-r-r-really be okay, J-J-J-J-Jeff?”

“Y-y-y-yeah...p-p-p-p-p-probably... W-w-w-w-we should be okay, b-b-b-but...”

For a moment, they all shot nervous glances at one another. Then, the four of them ran so desperately they almost hit their own chins with their knees. The ground shook and quivered under their feet, making it terribly difficult for them to keep their balance.

[Waaaiiit!]

[You won't get awaaaay!]

BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM............Poof.

“Waah!”

“Yaaaaaaah!”

All that rumbling silenced at once. And because the vibrations stopped so suddenly, the three of them were thrown weightlessly through the air and landed on top of one another like a heap of dumplings. That's the law of inertia at work.

“Ouch! Ouuch, whose foot is this?”

“Eek, don't touch me in such a weird spot!”

“Which spot on you is 'weird'?”

“Ugh...what did you say?”

“...Did they...disappear...?” Jeff mumbled. He looked around from the top of the heap. There was nothing–no dinosaurs, no gate, just that plateau of lava. He fixed his glasses, which had slipped down his nose, and he squinted his eyes to make sure. “They really did disappear... And if they disappeared, then... I had it right, after all! Yaaahoooo!”

Squiiish! As Jeff went limp with relief, the other three, who had been arguing, became even more squashed.

“I did it!” cried Jeff. “I successfully reconfigured an alien device!”

At the sound of Jeff's happy cries, the other three came to their senses.

“Whoa, it's true, they're totally gone!”

“You did it, Jeff!”

“Way to go, way to goooo, you little genius!”

They all held each other and jumped up and down in their joy.

“...But, wait...” said Paula. “Where did those poor little things...go?”

“Poor little things?” Jeff replied. “Oh, hmm...I assume they went back to their original dimension, but...I don't want to think about what might have happened if that's not the case, because it scares me.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“It is what it is, I guess...”

...Perhaps those dinosaurs were now causing trouble in some unknown world somewhere else. Their triumphant “We did it!” feeling had just begun to collapse upon itself, when...

“It's alright. You've done very well.”

...A deep, low voice, which was warped and garbled and somewhat slow, echoed throughout.

“Who...?” asked Ness, as he looked around.

“Who goes there?” asked Poo. He was alert and on guard.

“I am...I. The stone.”

“The stone?” said Jeff, as he blinked his eyes in bewilderment.

“Oh, no way!” cried Paula, and she pointed up ahead.

Rumble-rumble-rumble-rumble...

Sure enough...from somewhere beyond that slope of lava, an enormous, round thing, so large it could have squashed either of those dinosaurs flat with just one strike, appeared to be rolling right toward them! This must have been what it would feel like to be an ant looking up at a bowling ball. No...it was more like being an ant looking up at one of those extra large balls they rolled around at school on a Field Day!

Overwhelmed with shock and disbelief, the four of them stood there, frozen. At this rate, they were going to be flattened like pancakes! ...But by the time they realized this, it was far too late to run. Paula sat there helplessly, unable to stand, and Jeff frantically tried to pull her to her feet. Looking like the god Asura, Poo narrowed his eyes and performed some type of mudra. And then there was Ness...making sure to shield the others behind himself with his beloved bat held out to the side in a bunting position! That trusty bat seemed so useless here, like a matchstick, or a toothpick, or...no, no, like the ultra-fine lead tip of a mechanical pencil!

However...

“Hahahahaha, you are very brave, Ness,” said the deep voice. Just before it reached them, the talking stone came to a perfect halt. Suddenly, the surface of the stone twisted and warped until it became a face. This face was very large, but its eyes were somewhat droopy, its nose was small and compact, and it wore a very gentle smile.

“So you've finally arrived. I've been waiting for you.”

“...W-what are you talking about?!” Ness shouted. His voice was a bit hoarse from being so frightened, so he coughed to clear his throat. “...I don't (cough!) know you at all!”

“But I know you,” said the talking stone, with a hint of laughter in its deep voice. “And I know all of the very dire things going on in the world right now, without a single exception. Our friends are absolutely everywhere.”

“Your friends?” said Ness. “Do you mean the rocks, and the sand?”

“That's right,” replied the stone. “And iron. And gold. Any object made with minerals is a close companion of mine. And a good many plants and trees grow over top of us, and then the animals take in these plants. All living things are our friends.”

Slowly, Ness lowered his bat. He understood that this being was not looking for a fight. Seeing this, the other three were finally able to breathe again.

“Did you say you've been waiting?” asked Ness. “You've been waiting here...for me? But why? And how did you know I would come down here?”

“It is because you are the chosen one,” the stone replied. “Your fate is not merely your own. Everything that makes you who you are overlaps every part of the universe, and all living things.”

“You're a Kumari,” said Poo, with a nod. “I am a Kumari of Dalaam, but Ness...you are a Kumari of the entire earth.”

“That's right. It's just like that,” said the talking stone, and it smiled. “The seven power spots, or Your Sanctuaries, which had been scattered throughout the world were trials meant to determine if you would be worthy of this very weighty responsibility. They also served as gathering places for the prayers of all the living beings throughout this earth who have entrusted their hopes and desires to you. Do you remember the white light? That light represents the soundless voices of so many lives. Each time you saw that light, and each time you heard their soundless voices, you became a bit more...you. You regained yourself.”

“They've entrusted all that...to me...?” said Ness, quietly, and as he clutched at his chest, he realized that his shirt was still all rolled up. Flustered, he pulled it back down. “You really do know everything, don't you? Are there still power spots hidden somewhere out there? If there are any left, can you tell me where I can find them?”

“On the far side of time,” the stone replied, with an especially heavy tone. “It is not in this era, nor on this earth. You will not find it without first reaching the rift in time.”

“I see,” said Ness. “...So that's how it is. We have to go, then! Right away!”

“...No,” said the stone, as it closed its eyes and gently shook its head. And although it only gently shook its head, the ground trembled terribly and the four of them had to try very hard not to fall.

“Living beings cannot pass through the rift in time,” the stone went on. “Beyond this rift, all of time exists in chaos, from the instant this universe was born, to the moment it meets its demise in eternal and complete darkness. The body of a human being, which only lives for about one hundred years at the longest, would not be able to withstand it. Tossed about and battered by the storms and the vortexes of time, one would be annihilated in less than the blink of an eye. ...In the simplest of terms, all of the cells of one's body would have the life squeezed out of them in an instant.”

“But...but!” cried Ness, as he stumbled forward and approached the talking stone. “Then what the hell am I supposed to do?! What can I do?!”

“There is one who knows the answer,” said the stone. “You may find him in a certain laboratory in the mountains, in the northern part of Foggyland.”

“What?!” cried Jeff, as he jumped to his feet. “This one...this person... Could it possibly be... My...?”

“That's right,” said the talking stone, with a smile. “And at this very moment, he is wrapped up in a bit of trouble of his own. I think the best thing I can do for you is to bring you there as quickly as possible. And so, I will.”

The moment the stone said this, the scenery around them grew distorted, and the ground turned to froth as if it were an ocean covered in powerful waves.

“Whoa? Wo-wo-wo-wo-whoa!”

“Eeyaah! Wh-what is this?” cried Paula. “My hands and feet are numb, I feel awful!”

“We're teleporting,” said Poo. He was, as usual, the only one who remained calm. “Don't fight it. It will only hurt if you resist.”

“So if you want to know about the recent past, you ask an animal, the more distant past, you ask a tree, and the ancient past, you ask a stone,” Jeff muttered, an unusually philosophical expression on his face. “If stones are alive, then they must have an unimaginably long lifespan when compared to that of a human being. That stone must have been alive for so many tens of thousands of years. And so, it must also possess many unfathomable powers...”

“Aah! Everything has gone so dark... My body is floating...floating... I'm being torn to pieces!”

“I told you not to fight it.”

Doing his best to stay calm and relaxed while drifting weightlessly through darkness as thick as ink, Ness was silent as the talking stone's voice echoed in the depths of his ears.

“Ness, I have faith that you can do this. We will all be awaiting your decision. We will not force you. Think it over carefully, and take your time. This is a difficult choice to make. ...But I am certain, absolutely certain, that you will make the right one. I have no doubts. We trust in you... We believe in you...”

“Choice”? thought Ness. I don't know what that means...but, I know I'll never back down...!

He smiled to himself.

And the next thing he knew...the four of them had arrived somewhere completely different from where they had just been. There was a circle of strange stone pillars arranged side-by-side, and Ness and his friends stood in the center. ...They were right in the middle of Stonehenge.

Chapter 9 – Through the Rift in Time

A little while earlier...

Whirrrr, whirrr... Crackle-crackle-crack... A laser hummed, and sparks flew. Needles on analog gauges wavered, and red and blue lights blinked on and off. A man stooped over a computer console, and the plastic shield completely covering his face flashed from light to dark in rapid succession. As it flickered, that shield reflected a very distorted image of the gauges, the sparks, and the dizzying movements of the hands operating the tools. Then, it suddenly became fully transparent, revealing the face of a man with white hair–Dr. Andonuts–as he furrowed his brows in strained concentration.

Whirrrr, whirrr... Crackle-crackle-crack...

“Hmm?” The doctor grunted and stopped what he was doing. With his scowling face lit up from below in reds and blues, he looked like an actor playing Dracula in an old movie.

Whirrrrrrrrr... The sound of the laser became steadier, softer...and the sparks died down. The needles on the analog gauges came to a complete stop, and all of the lights changed at once to blue.

“...How is it going?” asked Apple Kid. He was clinging to the back of the chair the doctor was sitting in. His round and very gentle face was frozen in suspense.

“...Yes, how is it going?” echoed the mouse genius, Algernon, who had taken up his position in the breast pocket of Kid's white lab coat, and whose long whiskers were twitching excitedly.

“...I did it...hey, I did it,” said the doctor. His voice started as a whisper, but it grew into a loud, powerful cry. “I DID IT, Kid!”

The doctor flipped up his face shield, thrust his fist into the air, and suddenly and very forcefully spun the chair around. As he did, Kid, who had been leaning heavily on it, completely lost his balance and Algernon almost flew out of his pocket. Luckily, the doctor caught them both in his outstretched arms.

“At last...we've successfully engineered a device that can travel through both space and time!” the doctor cried, happily. “In the hands of mankind, this device is like the wings of Icarus–the first step toward traversing the many planes of the universe! I think I'll call it...the Phase Distorter!”

“It's wonderful!” cried Kid, his small eyes brimming with tears. “Doctor, you really are the smartest person in this whole world...!”

“You helped make this happen too, you know,” the doctor replied.

“Oh...doctor!”

“Kid, my boy!”

Knocking over the chair in their emotional excitement, the two scientists held each other tight, then tighter...then tighter still.

At the sound of that adorable voice, their knees went weak. When the two of them looked to the floor, they saw a group of Mr. Saturns jumping up and down so happily by their side.

“...But something about it just seems...wrong,” the doctor sighed.

“Something definitely does feel...off,” Kid nodded.

“Now, now, please don't gripe about it so openly,” said a third voice. From the far side of a glass door, two figures suddenly appeared wearing insulated work gear that looked a bit like spacesuits. One took off his helmet and smiled warmly–it was that super-genius, Maxwell. “If it wasn't for the help of the Mr. Saturns, we never could have pulled this off!”

“That's absolutely true,” said Dr. Andonuts, as he scratched his head. “You're right. I didn't mean anything bad by it.”

“More importantly...we need to contact Jeff and his friends right away!” added a fourth voice. The other figure pulled off his helmet, revealing a small boy with a soft, sweet face. It was Tony, from the Maurice School. “Where could they be?”

“I've tried to call them several times,” said Apple Kid. “Wherever they are, it must be someplace strange, because I just can't seem to get through to them.”

The four humans and one mouse exchanged anxious glances. The Mr. Saturns stopped their gleeful jumping, too. They touched their noses together, then they each turned and touched noses with the Mr. Saturns on their opposite sides as well, and they all sighed dejectedly.

This, as you have probably already guessed, was Dr. Andonuts' laboratory, just south of Lake Tess in Foggyland.

Answering the doctor's worldwide call for help, Maxwell, Apple Kid, and eleven Mr. Saturns came as fast as they could. The courageous Tony, who possessed far less scientific knowledge but who wanted to do anything he possibly could to help, came along, too. Including that very large and mysterious man, Cro, this team of just under twenty members had been living together in the lab for about a month and a half. As far as food was concerned, they ate mail-ordered microwaveable rice balls and cup noodles, and when they were feeling particularly ambitious, instant curry. In such a remote location as this, the lack of convenience stores was...well, inconvenient. As for sleeping arrangements, they each took turns, and at most, they slept for only about two and a half hours at a time. When it came to baths, none of them could remember taking any very recently, but even those were on a tight, strict schedule. Everyone had been working and researching so desperately, and today, this very day, they had finally accomplished their goal!

A first in human history, they had developed a vehicle that could travel through space and time–the Phase Distorter!

This device was kept behind a glass door. At a glance, it didn't look all that significant. It was shaped like a round dumpling, and had an equally round nose sticking out of the front. To put it frankly...it looked just like a Mr. Saturn. And this made good sense, as it was none other than the Mr. Saturns who had drawn up the original blueprints for such a time-space traveling machine. Because they were so short on time, Dr. Andonuts and the others couldn't afford to be picky about its appearance. They simply adjusted it as it was, to make sure that it could flow with, or against, the axis of time.

So then, why did the doctor call everyone here in such a hurry in the first place? How did he know that he had to build such a thing? ...Well, that was because the doctor, with his exceedingly brilliant mind, had concluded that the key to solving all of their problems must lie somewhere beyond space and time.

Tessie, the large men, that gang of primitive beings that seemed like ancestors of modern man, and many other strange creatures had suddenly appeared all over Foggyland. Among them was Cro, who seemed to have the ability to read minds. According to him, all of these beings were from an ancient earth, or in other words, the distant past–or perhaps, from another earth altogether, in a different dimension. But the doctor had been convinced that they all ended up here by absolute random chance, due to the chaos caused by some fault in one dimension or another. Then, Cro had come back to the lab carrying Jeff, of all people. Jeff, his own son, was wounded and unconscious, and he was muttering some barely-coherent story which further proved the doctor's convictions. And according to Jeff's unconscious mutterings...some villainous being called Giygas was the cause of all this!

Their world was in danger! This dimension was facing a catastrophe!

Out of all the brilliant scientists to whom the doctor had desperately appealed, there were some who laughed him off, assuming he'd read too many sci-fi novels. Some were too busy with their own research, some thought the task was impossible, and some simply refused. There was one who apologized profusely, stating that, regrettably, he could not stop the work he was currently doing due to personal loans he had to pay off. Many scientists who had promised to be there, and who had seemed reliable enough, simply never showed up. ...Oh, but, the heavens had not forsaken the doctor! The Mr. Saturns, who had arrived late (as you may remember, “hurrying” is not something Mr. Saturns are very good at), only reinforced the doctor's theories once again. After all, the Mr. Saturns crashed on this planet after a strange whirlwind overtook their interstellar craft!

“Mister Cro is out kinda late, isn't he?” muttered Tony.

The sudden sound of his voice brought everyone back to their senses.

“Where did he go, anyway?” asked Maxwell.

“He's off meditating,” the doctor replied, in an unpleasant tone. “He's probably at Stonehenge with his friends. No matter how busy we are, or how much I ask him to show some restraint, he stubbornly insists that he must join them. ...Damn, the man seems so intelligent, and yet he clings to such absurd superstitions!”

At these cutting remarks, Maxwell scowled beneath his very round glasses, and Kid looked up suddenly as if he'd been struck in the chest. He's at it again, they both mused.

The Mr. Saturns had that very same thought. The doctor was the type who sometimes spoke and acted in very nasty ways. If an experiment didn't go as planned, or if he simply woke up on the wrong side of the bed, he would kick his chair or desk out of frustration and send his cup noodles tumbling. If someone made even the slightest error, he'd really give them an earful, hurling all sorts of accusations.

But, because Maxwell and Kid had a great deal of respect for Dr. Andonuts, they didn't dare voice their opinions on the matter. People who are exceptionally intelligent or brilliant, or who are masters of this or that, do tend to be eccentric and misanthropic, generally speaking. Beyond cool and collected, they often end up with the reputation of being cold, stubborn, and selfish.

However...

“How can you speak that way?!”

...This concept had never occurred to the pure and innocent Tony. His youthful face had gone deep red, and he cried out with the voice of a boy soprano. “The way you talk about him is so cruel! Cro has worked harder than anyone else here, don't you realize that? And he even saved Jeff when he was wounded...!”

“I understand that perfectly well,” Dr. Andonuts replied, turning away with a huff. “And don't scream like that. I have a headache.”

“No, you don't understand!” Tony cried. As his frustration grew, his voice became louder. “You're so cold all the time, doctor! ...Even to your own son...even to Jeff! You...his own father...you don't understand how long, how terribly long he waited, and how heartbroken he was!”

“Heartbroken...?” said the doctor. His cheeks suddenly flushed with red, as if he'd been struck. “What...do you mean by that?”

“Parents' Visitation Day,” Tony replied. “Every time that day came around, Jeff would always tidy up our room so perfectly, and use his pocket money to buy flowers and things like that. And then he would wait for his father. Everyone else's family would come, and they'd have tea parties out in the garden, but Jeff...Jeff would always sit by the window and look so lonely as he watched them all and waited. ...But, you never came. You never came, not even once! And so...Jeff would always give the flowers to my mother. He'd act like that was the reason he bought them in the first place, but I always knew better. Christmas was no different. You never sent him a present, or even one card. And so Jeff...Jeff always wrote a card to himself, that said 'Merry Christmas'...” Tony paused to rub his eyes. “And it's the same with this machine. I don't understand a lot of the more complicated stuff...so I asked Maxwell, are you sure we won't have to try it out on mice first or anything like that? ...Seeing as Mister Apple had a mouse with him, and all...”

“D-don't even joke like that!” cried Algernon the mouse. He jumped up and dove into Kid's pocket, and only his tiny face peeked out as he trembled and shivered. “We're not even sure if that thing's built for return trips! Once you go out, you might never come back!”

“Exactly. That's just what I mean!” said Tony, and his child-like face turned fierce as he sharply hounded the doctor. “You plan to send your own son off in that thing? And yet you try to say you're not a cold man?!”

“...He was...” The doctor muttered quietly, as he stared off into the distance. “...He was waiting for me?”

Maxwell handed Tony a handkerchief, and with a small hoooonk!, he blew his nose into it. The Mr. Saturns drew in close and held Tony's hand gently.

“...Doctor,” Kid began, as he placed his chubby hand on Dr. Andonuts' shoulder, and gave the sort of smile that could easily put anyone's mind at ease. “Jeff's a really good kid. I know him well, we've spoken often. But, in a lot of ways, he's still very naive.”

“Of course he is,” Dr. Andonuts replied. “He's just a child!” Drops of spit sprayed from the doctor's lips as he shouted...and he found himself shocked by his own words. “You're right...he's still... He's just a child, isn't he...”

“...I'm sorry, doctor. I got too riled up,” said Tony, as he lowered his gaze to the floor and hung his head.

“...No.”

The doctor shook his head slowly and suddenly touched his hand, so covered in wrinkles, to Tony's cheek. His expression softened awkwardly, as if he were trying to smile. And eventually, somehow...he managed to do it.

“Thank you, young Tony,” the doctor said. “I'm happy to know he has as good a friend as you.”

“...F...father!” Tony cried, and he clung to the doctor's neck. Dr. Andonuts was completely flabbergasted. “...Father?” he repeated, in confusion.

“Oh, I-I'm so sorry!” Tony stammered, and he released his grip in a panic. “I...uh...I didn't mean anything weird by it! I didn't say that because I love Jeff or anything like that, I mean, of course I love Jeff, but I... Oh! I've got it! See, I always think of Jeff as being like a brother to me, and so, Jeff's father is like a father to me as well, then, isn't that...right? ...Heh.”

“Like a brother, hm...?” the doctor mused, sounding as if the words had stung...as if they had gotten caught in his throat. Staring off into the distance, he smiled. “Well then, that's only natural. Alright then, young Tony...from now on, please, call me Father.”

“Waah, really?! I'm so happy!” Tony cried, and he couldn't help but jump for joy.

“It really makes you that happy? Just to call me dad...?”

“For some reason, it does. Is that weird?”

Maxwell and Kid glanced knowingly at one another.

And just then...

The main door of the laboratory opened very slightly, and Cro appeared from behind it. “...Boss,” he muttered.

“What's this?” Dr. Andonuts shouted. “You're very late coming back, aren't you?!” He had gone right back to yelling, but Tony tugged on his sleeve. Flustered, the doctor did his best to put on a forced smile and, correcting his tone to the gentlest he could manage, he added, “Well, it's just that...as far as timeliness is concerned, the circumstances are somewhat different from what I imagined they'd be.”

“...I sorry, boss,” Cro went on. His pale, bearded face drooped suddenly. Then he pitched forward and began to fall over. “...I...wounded...” Craaash!

“Cro?!” shouted the doctor.

“Mister Cro!” cried Tony.

Maxwell and Kid hurried to Cro's side, when suddenly...

...With a loud SLAM!, the door flew open! The fallen Cro was sent flying across the room. As they rushed to his aid, all four of them abruptly froze in their tracks.

Standing before them was a strange, smooth, white being. He was wearing embarrassingly tight clothes that looked like a professional speed-skater's, and was poised with some sort of angular weapon that appeared to be a gun.

“Don't move! All of you, put your hands up!” said the strange being, as he flashed a daring smile. “This laboratory now belongs to Super Starman – me! Anyone who defies me will be executed without mercy!”

Pew, pew-pew-pew! He fired the gun and shot laser beams through the laboratory wall, leaving a somewhat crooked signature–SS. That's right, dear readers–you're already familiar with this guy, aren't you? It was that intergalactic monster salesman, the Super Starman...or SS-Man for short!

And, appearing from behind him in droves, there were Wooly Shamblers, Wild 'n Wooly Shamblers, Spinning Robos, Whirling Robos, Foppies, Fobbies, and a whole flock of robots. They were merchandise samples ordered from the catalog and sent in from somewhere or other out in the universe. ...And I'd bet that all of them were defective goods, returned by other customers!

“Damn it!”

“Doctor, what do we do?”

“Hmm...” Dr. Andonuts raised his hands defensively and took the slightest step forward. Suddenly, pew-pew-pew-pew-peeew! The laser gun fired again–a full sweep of the floor at his feet!

The doctor jumped back, nervously.

“Nu-hahahahaha! I told you not to move!”

“Why have you come here?!” cried the doctor. “What are your intentions?!” He raised his trembling voice to a shout as he questioned the SS-Man. Naturally he was very good at this, after all the years of practice.

“That should be obvious,” the SS-man replied. “We're here to break your new little toy!” He lowered his gun, and with strange-sounding footsteps, he finally entered the room. He leaned forward to get a better look at the Phase Distorter beyond the glass door, and then he shrugged flippantly. “My, my, this is surprising. What's with that tacky design? This ugly machine can travel through dimensions? ...Are you sure this thing really works?”

one of the Mr. Saturns replied, furiously.

“Oh, wait...!” Maxwell tried to interrupt, but...

“Ho-hoo, I see, I see!” said the SS-Man. He smiled wide under that tight mask. “So you're saying it's worth destroying, then!”

“...They're just too honest,” Maxwell sighed, and the Mr. Saturns all gasped.

said the Mr. Saturn, as it turned red.

“Well then,” said the SS-man, “here comes the fun part–Smashing Time!” He clapped his hands, and the chattering and murmuring of the alien mob was immediately silenced. “You can go as wild as you like, so, come on, everyone...go on, go on–”

...But he hadn't even finished his statement, when suddenly...

“Hyyyyaaahh!”

“Energy......blaster!”

“PSI Barrier!”

“Guardian spirits, punish them!”

...There came several daring cries, each overlapping the other, and the mob of aliens, which had crammed themselves into the laboratory's very narrow hallway, all suddenly dropped to the floor. They were swiftly mowed down with a pop, pop! by some sort of explosion. It happened in the blink of an eye! It was over so fast they had no idea what had even hit them. The whole crowd of alien robots had been reduced to nothing but rubble in no time flat!

“Wh-what the? What just happened?!” cried the SS-Man. He was taken completely by surprise, and with a piercing whistle, a column of steam burst from the top of his head. He looked around so frantically that he became a little dizzy.

The SS-man had lost his focus and lowered his gun–now was their chance! The doctor and his three partners gathered the Mr. Saturns in their arms and on their backs and frantically rushed into the glass room.

“Is everyone here?” asked Dr. Andonuts. “Alright, I'm closing us in!” He hit a switch that brought down fire and radiation-proof shutters, and with that, they were safe–for now. On top of that, the structure in which they had barricaded themselves was fully translucent, and so they had a perfect view as the battle outside progressed–their very own first-class front-row seats!

“...J...just who are you?” the SS-Man stammered. “I demand...I demand your names!”

A group of four stood before the flustered SS-Man, their task accomplished...and yes, of course, they were none other than our heroes! They each stepped forward, one at a time.

“I'm Paula, from Twoson,” said the first with a bright smile, her golden, curly hair fluttering adorably.

“I am Poo, from Dalaam,” said the second, folding his hands into a tight mudra.

“I'm Ness, from Onett,” said the third, as he lightly rested his bat on his shoulder and turned his red baseball cap slightly to the side.

And finally...

...With screwdrivers, wrenches, bottle rockets, and the jack for an electric micrometer held between his fingers like throwing knives...

“I'm Jeff, from Winters! And despite what you may think, I'm the heir to this laboratory!”

“Whoa!” gasped Apple Kid, with a smile.

“...Well said,” added Maxwell, as he put a hand to his chin in admiration.

“Wow, Jeff! You're amazing... ! You're wonderful...! You're so cool!” cried Tony, as he applauded eagerly.

Dr. Andonuts only stroked his chin and smiled, without saying a word.

Well, I suppose the next part goes without saying–The Super Starman, who was naturally very good at sales and business but not so good in an actual fight, was all but ready to surrender. In no time at all they pinned him down, took away that dangerous gun, and tied him up tight.

“Waahh, forgive me, have mercy on me!” he cried. “I'm nothing but a pawn in all this! I'll do anything you say!”

“Well then, talk!” said Ness. “Where's Pokey–I mean, where is Giygas?!”

“Master Giygas?” said the SS-Man. “I mean, that absolute fool? ...You're asking me for his whereabouts?”

“That's right! Tell us, now!”

“But...well, I don't really know what to tell you,” the SS-Man admitted. “That guy...I mean, that idiot, isn't even on this planet anymore. He's not in this galaxy, or even on this timeline. I'm sure that by now, he's in the rift between the dimensions, preparing to give birth any time now.”

“Give birth...?” Paula repeated, dumbfounded. “Did you say give birth? But isn't Pokey...a boy?”

“Gods do not have a sexual distinction. It is likely the same for demons,” Poo replied quietly.

“And how do we locate this specific super-dimensional rift?” asked Jeff, and it was a brilliant question, indeed. “That is possible, isn't it? Otherwise...you wouldn't be able to keep in touch with your 'boss'.”

“I have no way to do that!” replied the SS-Man. “It's like I already told you, I'm nothing more than a disposable underling. All I'm supposed to be doing now is waiting for that guy to successfully become his complete self once again, and take over this whole universe and all of time and space. ...Oh, woe is me...I have an elderly mother, a sickly wife, and three starving children back home, all waiting for me to send them my pay...why did things have to end up like this? ...Boohoohoohoo...”

Boy, for a guy with a name like “Super Starman”, he sure was pathetic, wasn't he?

“I guess it's no use...”

“So what do we do now?”

“There's not much we can do, we'll have to think of something else.”

Ness and his friends all breathed a heavy sigh.

“And what about this guy?”

“Should we bust him up like we did with all those robots?”

“Yeah, that's probably our safest bet.”

“...And maybe that family of his would be happier if this nasty guy never came back home, anyway.”

The four of them looked down at the Super Starman with cold eyes.

“Ah...! I'm sorry, please wait!” cried the SS-Man. Flustered, he began talking hurriedly. “Now that you mention it, I suddenly remembered something I overheard from Giygas the other day. There is only one way you'd be able to follow him into the super-dimensional rift.”

“And that is...?”

“That is...”

The SS-Man hesitated, and the four of them gathered closer. Poo raised his fists, and Ness held his bat at the ready. Paula glared at him with bloodthirsty eyes, and Jeff came at him with electrodes.

Taking one loud gulp, the SS-Man finally spoke again.

“That is...if you were to throw your living bodies away, transfer your spirits into robots, and jump through the rift in time... And...past that part, I don't fully understand it, but...he said you'd have to reclaim your Eighth Sanctuary...!”

The lake.

A giant mirror of water spread out before his eyes. The tiny mid-day sun glittered dazzlingly over little wavelets. The mountains on the far side in Winters, lined up in rows and crowned with soft, white snow that looked so much like powdered sugar, cast their inverted reflection on the water's surface.

There were no signs of any boats coming or going, or of any fishermen. It would be easy to mistake this vast lake for an ocean, except that there was no scent of salt, and no sound of waves.

The mysterious Lake Tess was silent, deserted, and perfectly still.

Ness was alone, sitting on a hill of clover and quietly taking in the scenery. He had one hand on the ground and the other resting on his knee.

A gentle breeze was blowing, stirring up the blades of grass or forcing them down in patches here and there. It rattled the branches of the old plane tree that stood beside him, causing a surreptitious rustling and creaking. Hearing a strange and unfamiliar sound, something other than the clear timbre of the leaves brushing against one another, Ness raised his head and looked up.

Here and there, in gaps between the green veils of overlapping branches, plane seed clusters hung like tiny round bells. One by one they would fall, and like a marching band's drumsticks, he could hear them as they struck all the little leaf drums on their way down. If he hadn't heard that sound, he wondered if he would have noticed them at all, this cute little harvest of seeds.

Ness smiled vaguely.

Then, with a sigh, he lowered his eyes.

He looked down at his shoes, so worn out now and covered in dirt and mud, nestled among disheveled patches of clover. The laces were a bit too long, so he had tied them in bows and held them up near his ankles under strips of Velcro. On the interior sides, there was an airy mesh above the arch of the foot meant to keep everything from getting too stuffy, and both shoes were covered in black and yellow stripes. It was a cool and very rugged design, great for kids who were particularly adept at running. They were a perfect fit, at size five. He was among the smaller boys in his class.

There was black soil stuck to the white rubber soles. Damp, heavy black soil. The kind which, if you were to use it in a garden, would grow the most delicious vegetables.

Ness blinked several times, then he looked back out at the lake. He winced, as the sudden brightness stung his eyes.

With his baseball cap turned just to the side, his complexion seemed somewhat pale, and it wasn't only because of the sunlight filtering down through the plane tree's leaves...

It seemed he had been sitting there, just like this, for such a very long time.

“Neeess!”

At the sound of a voice, Ness turned his head slowly.

Paula was climbing up the hill. She was wearing a terribly girly one-piece dress that was covered in ribbons and frills. He had never seen her like this before. As she walked, her golden curls bounced at her shoulders, becoming a gorgeous frame for her beautiful, smiling face.

“So this is where you've been,” she said. “I've been looking for you.” Lowering herself down next to him, Paula neatly tucked in her skirt and sat with her arms wrapped around her knees. The lace of her white petticoat peeked out from beneath the hem of her white dress. From a distance, the dress had appeared to be very plain, but now that she was right beside him, he could see that it was covered in a pattern of small, subtle flowers. “Wow, this place is really pretty, isn't it?”

Ness didn't say a word. It didn't appear that he was annoyed with her, but he didn't seem very happy, either.

Seeing Ness in such a state, Paula became quiet, too.

A breeze passed over the two of them. With little plinks and plunks, the plane tree seeds continued to fall.

Paula fiddled with her hair and seemed perfectly at ease as she gently brushed her fingertips through the clover, twirling the stems. Suddenly, she cried, “Oh! This one has four leaves!” and she plucked it up. “It's just like us, don't you think? Four leaves... Four of us.” Softly, she touched the clover to her lips.

Ness turned his head and looked at Paula, and suddenly, he opened his mouth as if he had something to say.

“Hey, let me ask you something,” Paula interrupted, before he could even begin. “Ness...what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Ness was startled by this question and his eyes opened wide, then he breathed a deep sigh. “...A baseball player, probably.”

“Hmm, is that so?” said Paula. With a somewhat disinterested nod, she went on. “Me, I have a lot of answers. Listen, hear me out–I want to be a ballerina, maybe, or an actress, or an opera singer, or a mounted police officer! Something like a Pit Babe might be fun too, don't you think?”

“You wouldn't want to be a preschool teacher?”

“...That would be fine, too,” Paula replied, “but, well, I'll tell you what I really want. My real dream.” She rubbed her knee up against Ness's. “It's not just to be a Pit Babe. Listen, you know...I also really want to be the wife of an F1 racer. With an Apollo cap on my head, a ponytail sticking out through the hole in the back of it, knee-high leggings...and a pure-white T-shirt, short enough that my belly button shows, and underneath that, absolutely no bra at all!”

“N-no...?” Ness stammered, and his face turned bright red.

Paula ignored him and went on. “And I'd be wearing totally black sunglasses, with my nose stuck up in the air all snooty, watching the race and looking so cool in my perfect seats. And everyone's cameras would all be pointed directly at me. And then, if my husband were to die during a race, it would be the first time I'd ever show my true emotions publicly, and I'd cry with all my might like, waaaah, waaaah! ...Because I never did pay any attention to all those rumors that my husband had been with so many other women!”

Ness remained quiet.

“Wouldn't that be great?” Paula went on. “Yeah...that's the life for me! Don't you think it'd be cool? The wife of an F1 racer...a woman among women...the perfect career choice!”

Is it...really? Ness thought, but he didn't say a word.

After all, a long time ago, when she was still a supermodel, Ness's mother Rachael was rumored to have been dating a certain F1 racer, herself. She had shown Ness a photo of him once and said that in truth, she had loved him, for a short while.

He was a very famous person, and even Ness had heard of him. But he had passed away since then.

So why did you marry papa, then? a very young Ness had once asked. His mother hesitated for a moment, and then answered.

I realized that in the end, I would always come second, or even third, to someone like him. His goal was never just to win. Well, he did always think the races were about winning, of course. And he never considered for a moment that he might lose. If he thought about that, he knew he wouldn't be able to race very well. But, it was never about the thrill of an actual victory... To him, racing was more about honing his skills. And risking it all, in every single moment, was the most important thing in his life. Second to that were probably his rivals and teammates. ...And his feelings for a woman came last of all. If I had fallen in love with him, my life would have been nothing but trying to keep up, and it would have been a very bleak existence–no joy at all. And then, on the other hand, there is your papa. No matter what happens, he always considers me to be his number-one treasure in the whole wide world. ...And, I don't have to worry about him dying while he's at work. Ah-hahahahaha! ...Ahh, and yes, it's true. Your papa is madly in love with your mama! Like, for example, when he...oh! What have you got me telling you now? Hey, hey now, don't press your mama for answers. No, no, I can't tell you about that yet. ...Oh, I know. When you're really a man, maybe...maybe I'll tell you then, okay?

Ness called to mind a nostalgic vision of his mother's face. She was smiling mischievously, still so beautiful and sassy even for her age.

So...I guess that's what Paula is like, too, thought Ness. ...I would figure she'd call something like that “sexist”...I thought she was so surprisingly old-fashioned...

“Yeah. That's right. I am surprising,” said Paula. “...I'd make a very poor feminist, actually.” She smiled gently. Flustered, and realizing his mind had been read, Ness winced.

“...The actual truth is much different,” Paula went on. She twirled those four leaves against her cute little nose and gazed off into the distance across the lake. “Honestly, the thing I want above everything else...isn't all that impressive. Despite how it may seem, it's really a very simple wish.”

“What is it?”

“Well,” she began. “...What I want to be is...just...”

Paula seemed uncharacteristically bashful, and her next words never left her mouth. She spoke only with the movement of her lips.

A M-O-T-H-E-R...

“Oh, I see,” said Ness. He was so startled he could only give this short reply. “That's understandable.”

“Isn't it, isn't it?!” cried Paula, as her face broke into a wide smile. “Any child of mine would be so cute, wouldn't they? And I'm sure I'd become such a doting parent, making so many matching dresses and things like that for them to wear. My, my, what a wonderful mother-and-child pair they make!...is what each and every person we passed on the street would say...”

Paula giggled to herself.

“Well, why don't you just...do that?” said Ness, as he wrapped his arms around his knees. “I'm sure it would work out just fine.”

“Yeah, but...well, I can't, anymore,” she replied, and she suddenly stopped smiling. She stared at Ness with an unusually intense look in her eyes. “...Because I'm going with you.”

“............”

Ness stared back at Paula, dumbfounded. Paula nodded deeply, and with her lips trembling slightly, she placed her hand on top of Ness's.

“Take me with you.”

“A...absolutely not! Absolutely not, Paula!” Ness cried. “This...this is my problem, I don't want to drag you into–”

“What? No way!” said Paula, and she pinched his hand so hard! “Ness, don't tell me you were planning on running away! Don't tell me you were thinking, I've had enough, I'm done, I can't take any more of this!”

“Ouch, ow-ow-ow-ow-ow!” Ness cried. “You're wrong! You've got it all wrong!”

“Well, then why are you being so indecisive and vague?!”

“It's because...” Ness began, shaking his head. “Well, that's just it. I'm an indecisive person. I just don't have the courage it takes to say, Yes, I'm going, or, Turn me into a robot, please. I keep feeling like I need a little bit more time, just a little bit more time to think about it... But, no matter how much I think about it, it does me no good. I know I have to make my decision soon...and so I...”

Ness turned away, and the glittering sunlight on the surface of the lake reflected, shimmering, in his misty eyes.

“...And so I came here, to cool my head,” he went on. “I thought that looking at all of this might give me some peace of mind. I wanted to have a clear memory of it all...the mountains, the sky, the water...”

“Ness...”

“But...don't worry.” He turned to look back at her, and he smiled warmly. “I'm gonna go. Just me. I made my decision. I finally made my decision.”

“I said I'm coming with you!” cried Paula. She blinked the tears from her eyes, and Ness looked bewildered as she flung herself at him and nuzzled her cheek against his chest. “I'm not going to let you go all by yourself! I just can't–I can't let you go alone!”

“...And we won't let the two of you go on by yourselves, either.”

Startled, Ness and Paula jumped away from one another and looked toward the sound of the voice. Jeff and Poo were making their way up the hill.

“I'm going, too.”

“And I, as well.”

They came to the top of the little hill and stood beside their friends.

“There's no point trying to stop us, Ness.”

“We're going.”

“Wait...please, all of you,” said Ness. “I can't...I just can't let you do this!” He stood up and was so insistent in his words that spit flew from his mouth. “There's no need for all of you to sacrifice yourselves like this!”

“My dad's the one who built the machine,” said Jeff, with a shrug. “I want to ride in it, and I want to be the one to pilot it. Do you have a problem with that? And, well, if you insist on going, I guess I can give you a ride, too, if you like?”

“This is my fate,” said Poo. His hands were tucked deep into his sleeves, and he wore an expression that looked so much like a statue of the Buddha. “It is the destiny of the Kumari born of the six-hundred-sixty-sixth generation. On the pride of the kingdom of Dalaam, I must fulfill my duty. And besides...who else knows how to take a soul which has been separated from its organic body and put it into a metal one? If I am unable to do it for you, then who will?”

“We're going to win, I'm sure of it,” said Paula. “And once we do...I'll have become like a mother to absolutely everyone!” She stood up, took the hem of her dress in her fingers, and whirled and twirled. Like a ballerina, she balanced on her toes and danced round and round in circles. The sky, the mountains, the lake...the trees and the grass, and even the air itself...she welcomed each and every one into her arms...into her heart. She felt as though she were holding them all tight. “I'll become like a mother to this entire, wonderful world!”

Hey, look at this, she seemed to say, as she held out her hand. In it, there was a small, fragile, green sprout. It had gently rounded leaves, which were all connected right in the middle.

...The four-leafed clover!

“...Inseparable destinies,” said Poo softly, with a warm smile.

“We'll all go together,” said Jeff.

“.....................”

Ness was silent, and he looked around at his friends. Each of them seemed happy. They were smiling. In their faces, he could see that they had all completely made up their minds.

...And there's no way anything can ever change the way we feel!...their faces seemed to say.

“...I understand,” said Ness. He closed his eyes...and then he opened them again. Suddenly his face was no longer so pale. ...It was bright.

“Let's all go, then...together!”

Paula seemed out of breath as she held out that little clover. The other three layered their hands on top of hers and clasped them together, tightly. Their heartbeats became as one. These inseparable friends were bonded forever, heart-to-heart...!

“...So. You've made your decision, then.”

Seeing the calm and earnest looks on each of their four faces as they stood before him, Dr. Andonuts uttered something like, “I understand,” spun in his chair, and turned away from them. As he fiddled with a pencil he held between his fingers, he asked, “Well now, how many of you will be going?”

“All of us,” Ness answered. “All four of us. We all want to go together. ...We'll all fit, right?”

The pencil fell onto the console with a crisp, clear, powerful sound which echoed through the silent laboratory. For a short while the doctor remained perfectly still, and then, finally, he heaved a sigh. Lowering his elbows onto the armrests of the chair, he turned to face them once more, and his expression seemed just as stern, cold, and condescending as always.

“You will all fit,” he replied. “And the robot bodies have already been prepared–all four of them. I thought this may end up being the case, so I built four in advance. I left no room for error in my plans.”

“Thank you,” said Jeff, as he stepped forward. “Doctor–I mean, father...thank you so much.”

Still holding himself high and proud in his chair, the doctor bowed his large head by only a fraction of an inch in a very distinguished way. As he bowed, he looked at his wristwatch with a start and said, “Oh, I must go, I must go! I just remembered I have so many things left to do. ...Well then, you four, make sure you're in proper shape for all this.” He got hastily to his feet, and with his worn-out sandals making flipping and flopping sounds the whole way, he ran out of the room.

...Shortly after this, as Ness tried to enter the laboratory bathroom, he heard someone sobbing in one of the stalls. There was also a rustling sound, as if this someone were using a great deal of toilet paper. Ness stood there for a moment. He bit his lower lip. Then, with his head bowed deeply, trying not to make a sound...he softly closed the door.

The four test subjects and every member of the laboratory staff got together in the meeting room. After all, this would be the world's first soul-transplant operation. They had to be sure that every single person involved fully understood and consented to all of this.

Maxwell and Apple Kid were standing in front of a whiteboard and explaining the robots' construction and features using a brilliant diagram. The doctor handed out printed sheets giving a general outline of the cryopreservation techniques that would be used to keep their physical bodies safe once the souls had been removed. One by one, the Mr. Saturns stepped forward and did their best to explain what a soul even was and how it worked in the first place, but the humans in the group had a hard time understanding them. And so, Poo stood up in their place and told them all about one of the secrets of his kingdom.

In Dalaam, it was said that one who had sufficient training could obtain the ability to separate their soul from their body and transfer it temporarily into animals or objects. It was also said that some who had transferred their souls in this way eventually forgot that they had once been human, and thus, were never able to return. For example, Poo explained, there were some who ended up remaining as butterflies for the rest of their lives–things like that.

“The way to do this...cannot be explained using words,” said Poo, as he looked around at his three friends with narrowed eyes. “I will go first to the realm of the dead, set up a barrier, and wait. I need you to remain calm and follow my trail. When all four of us are rejoined, we will transfer into these things you call robats.”

The other three nodded, though they seemed to be very nervous. Poo smiled warmly. And when he smiled, he looked just like the Gautama Buddha.

“Don't worry,” he said. “This will not be the first time that you have been there. You have no reason to be so afraid.”

“This isn't our first time...?” said Jeff, looking bewildered for a moment. “Oh, you must mean...the time I made that bet!”

“That's right. I was the one who prepared that place for you,” said Poo, as he blinked slowly. “All manner of spirits and demons can suddenly approach an inexperienced soul who finds themselves in that realm. I kept them at bay so that they did not interfere. ...But it was absolutely not an illusion. That world is real. The boy you saw when you were there, he was real, too. He came to you for a short while, from the realm of heaven.”

“...So that's what that was,” said Jeff, quietly. He looked back out of the corner of his eye and seemed only vaguely aware of Dr. Andonuts, who was sitting behind him. “Thank you, Poo.”

“Well, so that place–that was the realm of the dead?” said Paula, as she raised her hand. “I had no idea! I was just so desperate to follow Jeff and Ness, and then somehow I ended up there!”

“That's right,” Poo replied. “...And that's all I have to say.” He stepped down from the podium, and just as he did...

...Said one of the Mr. Saturns (the one who apparently never shook the rhyming habit it picked up from a certain someone). When a Mr. Saturn by its side shot it a very stern look, it turned bright red.

“Well, if no one else has any particular questions, I believe this meeting is just about over,” said the doctor, as he stood up. “...Is everyone ready?”

They all nodded.

“Well then, let's get started, at once!”

Snap! The surgical lights came on.

Suddenly, many figures appeared. They were wearing light green surgical gowns with matching caps and face coverings. They were all Mr. Saturns, with their noses hidden behind specially-made, cone-shaped masks. Because of their short stature, they were standing on raised platforms, holding their gloved hands high in the air as if to avoid touching anything.

Shooo......haaaa......shooo......haaaaa...

Air was flowing in from somewhere. Ness felt his bare chest being wiped down with a cold alcohol swab. There was the sweet smell of nitrous oxide. He breathed in slowly and deeply, and his head became hazy. The sense of being so light and airy felt kind of nice.

Poke! Something pierced his arm, but instead of something like “ouch”, he felt more like saying simply, “ah, there's the injection.”

Papa...mama, I'm sorry. I made a selfish decision, Ness thought. But, I thought that if I told you what I planned to do...it would only shock you. So...please don't be sad. Please don't feel hurt. I'm...I'm going to...I'm going to find it! My last Sanctuary...

In his fading consciousness, Ness saw a vision of his family. His papa and mama, and Tracy, and their old dog King were all standing at the front door of their beloved home, saying, Take care!, and waving their hands and smiling.

A single tear seeped from behind his closed eyelids, rolled across the side of his face, and trickled all the way down to his ear.

––––––Replenishing antiproton energy...

––––––Antiproton energy replenishing complete.

––––––Removing auxiliary support...

––––––Auxiliary support removal complete.

––––––All members take your seats...

––––––All members have been seated.

“Alright,” breathed Dr. Andonuts. Sitting at the console, the doctor gave a relieved smile and pressed the switch on a speaker. “We're ready whenever you are!”

“We're ready over here, too,” came a voice in reply. “Please remove the primary support.” There was a slight bit of an electronic buzz to this voice. But even so, the doctor knew it very well. Because the voice...was Jeff's.

“Understood,” the doctor replied. “Removing primary support.”

Whhiiiiiiinn! A mechanical arm that had been bracing the rounded body and base of the Mr. Saturn-shaped multi-dimensional time-space traveling machine, the Phase Distorter, disconnected itself from the craft.

“Primary support removal complete.”

“Well then, let's begin the countdown. Ten...... Nine......”

On their side of the glass window, Dr. Andonuts, Apple Kid, Algernon, Tony, Maxwell, and the Mr. Saturns all looked on in such suspense that they forgot to breathe.

“...Good luck,” Tony whispered quietly, his hands clasped as if in prayer.

“Eight...... Seve–wh-what are you doing, Paula? Why are you over here?!”

“Because I want to see better!”

“You can't do that! If you don't sit in your own seat over there, you'll...you'll throw off the balance, and...waaah!”

“AAAAAAAAHHH!”

Their screams came through over the console. The Mr. Saturn-shaped Phase Distorter lurched to one side. It seemed as though it would topple over at any moment! Ahh, but just then, luckily, it began to right itself. ...Then it wobbled...wobbled...and then wobbled even more, until, quite unsteadily, it spun itself around. It looked just like a roly-poly toy, or like a top with a rounded bottom. At this rate, it was going to crash right into the laboratory wall!

“Uwaaaaugh!”

“Eeeeek! You have to do something!”

Swish, swoosh, whing...wham!

From within the wobbling, whirling machine, Ness and his friends could hear the voices of the doctor and the others as they ran frantically this way and that, bumping into one another in their panic.

“Wah, this is awful!” cried Jeff. “We can't go on like this! I guess we'll just have to take off without a countdown. Papa, everyone, take care of yourselves! You guys, grab onto something, alright? Alright...well.....eeeyaah! It's GO time!”

“Here we GOOOOOO~!”

There came the resounding echo of all four of their voices, and then...

......Poof......

Wobbling and spinning, and with a slight buzzing sound, the Saturn Top–I mean, the Phase Distorter, disappeared. Completely and entirely. Without a trace.

muttered one of the Mr. Saturns.

“They're gone...” said Tony, as he flopped down into his seat.

“Oh, darn,” said Algernon. “I didn't have time to say it while they were still here, so I guess I'll just say it now!” He hopped out of Kid's pocket and onto the console, and he energetically waved a flag he'd made in honor of their successful launch. “Good luck out there! And please, oh please, come home saaaaafe!”

If you were to dissolve pure black ink into a basin full of water and stir it with a chopstick, gently and carefully insert a sheet of calligraphy paper into it, then slowly pull that paper back out, the image that would appear there would be something like what the four of them were seeing now. It felt as if someone had created many ink artworks this way, then made several photo-copies of each sheet one after the other while rotating them randomly, and then turned those sheets into a video by filming them–or, to put it more simply, this space they were in looked like the grainy, black background from the credits of an old monster movie playing on and on, endlessly.

The Mr. Saturn-shaped time-and-space-traveling machine flew along shakily. Well, no, to be honest, calling it “flying” wouldn't be quite accurate. It was more like the craft was floating in place while everything around it flowed past. With a rustling and a whooshing sound like rain or white noise, absolutely everything rushed around them...going up and down, left and right, into the far past and the distant future, and in every other conceivable vector.

“...Mmnh...ohh......what happened?” said the Ness Robot, who was the first to come to his senses. Inside that wildly spinning Saturn Top, the four of them had been tossed around like clothes in a dryer and were now lying in a heap on the floor like a pile of dumplings. With a small heave-ho!, the Ness R. pulled himself out of the pile and turned to look at the other little dumplings.

Of course, their new bodies were considerably different from the ones they'd left behind. Each of them was shaped like a shiny silver drum canister, and they were almost completely identical. Their arms and legs were silver, bellow-shaped tubes. The only feature that made Ness look any different from the rest was a visor-like object that stuck out from the area where his forehead would have been. It seemed to be a memento of the baseball cap he used to wear. And so, with everyone else in a pile on the floor like that, it was a little difficult to tell who was who.

“...Well, there's not much I can do about that, I guess,” Ness muttered. He knocked with a rough bang bang! on whoever it was at the very top of the silvery pile and pulled at their bellow-shaped arm. “Hey, which one are you? And can you stand up?”

“Ouch...easy, easy! ...Ow, ow, ow...” It was the Jeff Robot, and he stood up. Just for the sake of identification, an attachment that looked something like a pair of glasses had been affixed to what would have been his face. “How terrible,” he said. “Even though we're in bodies like these, we can still feel pain when we're hit? Either that, or it's just some reaction that seems like pain...”

“Even stones feel their own sort of pain,” said the Poo Robot, as he crawled out of the pile. He had an antenna made to look like his ponytail. “Iron feels its own sort of pain, too. ...It's something like that.”

“Sorry,” said the Paula Robot. She was the last one to raise her head, which was topped with an attachment shaped like a bow. “...I didn't know that would cause such a huge problem...”

“I guess I can't blame you,” said the Jeff R. His shoulders slumped and he looked very defeated. He still retained the same mannerisms and speech patterns he'd had as a human. “Your body weight has increased very suddenly. And so the way the law of inertia works on you has changed, too. So just...try to be careful when making any sudden movements.”

“...My body weight increased?” the Paula R. muttered. She tried to bite her thumbnail, realized she didn't have any teeth, and hastily pulled her hands behind her back. “Oh, how cruel! If I had only known that soon it wouldn't make a difference anyway, I would've treated myself to so many more cookies and potato chips...”

“Training your physical body makes very little difference,” said the Poo R. “It is only after you enrich your soul that you can be called a true master.”

“Jeff, I'm very sorry,” the Ness R. began, “but it's a little hard to move in these things. It would have been really nice if your father had chosen forms a bit closer to actual human bodies.”

“Yeah, well...see, my dad always considers efficiency first, prioritizing his theories...and then when it comes to budget, he's a real cheapskate,” the Jeff R. replied, sounding very apologetic as he returned to the cockpit. Then, he suddenly cried out in surprise. “Oh! It looks like we're passing through three-dimensional space now. The coordinates are...AZ412, 01272, 8083...Bingo! A whole continent right in the core of the earth!”

Materializing high above the ground and right out of thin air, the Phase Distorter headed straight for a range of huge volcanoes in the depths of the earth as though it were running on invisible rails. The Mr. Saturns had analyzed the characteristics of Ness's other Sanctuaries and had entered the data obtained from them into the Phase Distorter so that they would be brought directly to the one that still remained.

The sky was red-hot, the earth rumbled, and rivers of lava twisted along the ground like snakes. Ness and his friends looked down from high above as they sped with tremendous force through a scene both magnificent and terrifying, one that would not have looked out of place in a painted depiction of hell. The Ness R. got the feeling that the talking stone might have been looking up at them from that very same plateau, and as they passed by, he could have sworn he saw a stone that was just as large and round.

Before long, the Phase Distorter approached a volcano that was erupting fervently with bubbling magma and intense heat. Suddenly, the little craft dove straight in without any hesitation. If they had burned up and melted away instantly it would not have surprised them at all, but the Mr. Saturns' technology continued to amaze them! There was a bit of a rough vibration and a scraping sound as they entered the volcano, but inside the Phase Distorter, the air became only the slightest bit hotter.

Like a stone tossed into quicksand, they burrowed their way down through boiling mud with the consistency of thick porridge. Down, down...deeper and deeper...

As they continued onward, all sounds stopped, the vibrations vanished, and that burning red darkness disappeared from the cockpit's monitor. Then, off in the distance, a wriggling ring of light appeared, looking a bit like an amoeba under a microscope. Suddenly, a gush of little specks of light flowed forth, piercing through the heavy protective armor of the time-space traveling craft and drifting in mid-air around the four of them. These bright little particles, which touched without giving a sensation of touch, were neither warm nor cold, and neither sweet nor salty, passed right through their metal bodies, performing a soft and airy dance of light.

“This is the rift in time,” said the Poo R.

“It's so strange,” murmured the Paula R., as if she were half-dreaming. “I feel as though I can see music with my own eyes. ...Or like I can touch a scent!”

“...Ahh,” sighed the Jeff R., as he shut his eyelids–er, his eye-shutters–tight, and swayed gently back and forth. “I'm...I'm glad. ...I'm glad that I came here and...that I got to feel this for myself... I'm really glad.”

A multitude of timelines, all forms and possibilities of existence, and every one of the multiple dimensions in the universe... They all gather here, perish here, rest here...and then are born here, again... The Ness R. contemplated all of this. As this was Ness, he would not have been able to describe these concepts in such difficult words or theories. He only knew this, and he could feel it.

And all of this was the will of someone who was infinitely kind, and boundlessly great. This was Ness's gut feeling, and he did not need to understand it.

Everything here was equal, everything was irreplaceable, and everything had meaning. The good things, and the bad things. The strong, and the weak. In the hands of that one will, brilliance and shadow performed that dance of light in every moment of life. In war and in rivalry. In meeting and in separation. ...And in love.

...Ah, I see, thought the Ness R. ...Hmm, that kind of thing...that's what love is all about...

He smiled softly. This perfectly unclouded understanding came to him like a sudden burst of inspiration. It was instinct.

The Ness R. felt as though he suddenly understood all sorts of things very well. The things that Buzz Buzz and the talking stone had said, especially.

I am...the universe. My fate, and the fate of the universe, are one and the same. They are merging together....

And then, finally, the Phase Distorter came to a stop. As soon as the Mr. Saturn-shaped craft reached the ground, it automatically extended its legs and the exit hatch opened.

Amid a shower of those fluttering little luminescent beads, the Ness R. climbed a staircase made of pure light. Slowly...steadily. His three closest friends followed behind in solemn silence.

“So you've finally come.”

Addressed by this voice, the Ness R. stopped in his tracks.

His robot eyeballs adjusted themselves to the overbearing brightness.

At the source of this brightness, there was a spring of light. Shades over his eyes helped to ease the overwhelming luminescence...and then he saw it.

Standing in front of the fountain of light was an animal, more dazzling and more beautiful than those he had seen in the other seven Sanctuaries. It held its head low and remained alert and focused as it crouched in a very threatening posture.

Ness's heart, which had just been filled with so much joy, now felt a sudden ache.

A dog. Just like his dear, beloved, precious old King. ...This creature was a dog.

Of course, this dog wasn't shaggy and overweight, like King was. Bathed from behind in that powerful light, its lean, black body had a glossy shine to it like the finest velvet. Its whip-like tail swayed in a slow rhythm. It was also considerably large. If you didn't know much about dogs, you might wrongfully wonder to yourself, is that a black panther?

“I am the Carbon Dog,” the dog said, grinning wide and displaying its fangs. “What do you think? Do you think you can defeat me? Would you like to try...Ness?”

The Ness R. stepped forward without saying a word. His hands hung limply at his sides. He didn't exert himself at all. Very casually, and with no hostility, he continued on leisurely as if he came here for walks all the time.

“...Hmph,” huffed the Carbon Dog, and it crouched even lower, as if it were preparing to pounce.

But the Ness R. kept walking. He just kept right on walking. As if he were saying, go ahead, bite me, please.

“Grr...gggrrrrrrr...gggraaaawwrr!”

As swift as the flip of a switch, the Carbon Dog leapt forward, aiming to swallow the Ness R.'s head in one gulp, but just then...

––––––Shhup!

...The Ness R. raised one of his arms. He held the index finger of his right hand straight up and lifted it to about his chest. He seemed to have no desire to fight. He didn't even look at the Carbon Dog. He just held his finger there, calmly, as if he were only checking the direction of the wind. Then, one moment later...

...Yipe, yipe, yipe!

The Carbon Dog held its muzzle between its paws and began to writhe on the ground. With a fwhish, fwisssh, fwissh!, it snorted violently through its nose. It seemed to be in so much pain that it couldn't stand back up. Its limbs were splayed out wide and trembling terribly.

“I'm so sorry, are you okay?” Ness cried. He reached out as if to pet it, but with a whimper, the dog backed away. It stumbled and fell over the edge of the stairway of light. With a mournful, drawn-out howl, it vanished.

“...What the heck just happened...?” the Ness R. muttered, in a daze. “What did I do...?”

“You've become a master,” said the Poo R., as he crossed his arms. “You do battle instinctively, without need of a plan. You protect yourself without forethought. This is the secret strength of the warrior. It is known as the state of nothingness.”

“Is it something like...choosing 'auto mode' on the battle screen in an RPG?” asked the Jeff R.

“Don't tease,” replied the Paula R., glaring at him from the corner of her eye.

Now...if the Poo R. is teased...does that make Pu'er...tea? ...Aaah, I'm so sorry! Your author is still suffering from Belch's awful rhyming curse! Enough with this curse! ...Enough!

Er, uhh... Ahem.

Now then–the Ness R. continued on toward the light that the Carbon Dog had been guarding. This light engulfed him completely. ...And then he heard it. A melody that was unknown to him, and yet, he could swear that he had heard it somewhere before.

The Sound stone, which was currently being held inside the Ness R.'s body, recorded the melody of the Fire Spring. Amid all the dancing lights, the Ness R. could see it. A far-too bright, colorless vision of himself as a small child, running up a hill...

Ahh, he knew this place! If he ran up this long, uphill path as fast as he could, he knew he'd find that familiar old house–the house where Ness, his papa, his mama, and his little sister all lived happily together.

The garden, absolutely overflowing with flowers in full bloom... The beautiful green lawn that his papa tidied and mowed every Sunday...

Woof!

Spotting Ness and letting out an excited little bark, a very shaggy dog suddenly began running toward him. Ah, it was King! King, who still had the cheerful expression and energetic gait of a puppy, even though he was already full-grown. Ness embraced him as he leapt into his arms, and King licked him all over. Ness held him tight and felt the warmth of his fur, and he breathed in the familiar scent of a dog who had been basking all day in the warm sun.

––––––Haha, cut it out, King! ...I'm covered in drool!

But King did not do as he was told. In fact, it seemed as though he would be satisfied by nothing less than a deep kiss!

––––––Oh, are you home, Ness?

It was his mama's still-so-youthful voice. The front door opened, and he caught a glimpse of the white slippers on her feet.

...But before he had a chance to see the rest of her, suddenly everything began to whirl and spin. The world around him dissolved and melded together, and the next thing he knew, his formless, weightless, body-less soul was drifting near the ceiling of a room. He could see an empty crib. A shiny new bat that had yet to be used. Tiny shoes, for a baby. A little terrycloth plush horse. A cradle that began to rock itself gently, even though there was no hand there to push it.

––––––Ness?

There was a voice. It was his papa. His papa's voice.

––––––Yes, I think Ness is the right name for him.

––––––Don't you think so, Ness?

His mama spoke, too.

––––––Wow, he really smiled...he knows his own name, already!

––––––Hey, why don't you try that red baseball cap on him?

...Ah-hahaha...it's too big, but it looks good on him, don't you think?

––––––I hope King won't be jealous of the baby.

––––––It'll be fine. He'll adore him. Like a little brother!

––––––Yeah, I think you're right.

––––––Yes, of course.

––––––I don't think he needs to be rich or famous...

but I want him to be a thoughtful, strong boy...

––––––He will be, I'm sure.

––––––Yeah, I think you're right.

––––––Yes, of course. Of course...of course...

Of course...

Papa, mama...

The Ness R. wanted to cry. But robots do not shed tears. And they do not grit their teeth, either. Instead, he clenched his silver fingers tightly...so tightly it felt like they might shatter, and he tried to keep his heart from breaking. And then...

“Aaa~h, what a happy coincidence!”

...Suddenly there was a young boy at his side, standing so close he could reach out and touch him, and this young boy was glaring at Ness. He was stout and pudgy, and his face was frozen into a scowl.

“Pokey...!”

Ness and Pokey stood there, facing one another.

Regaining the form of a spirited young boy, Ness was wearing the same red baseball cap as always.

They were deep in the vacuum of space, with the stars twinkling all around.

Even though there was nothing like a floor beneath them, the two stood there just the same, as comets flew by trailing their long tails behind them.

“You're really...you're great, you know,” said Pokey. “I'm...I'm jealous. I'm worthless.” Like a typical moody child, he thrust his hands into his pockets and kicked at an imaginary pebble. “No matter what I try to do, I just can't get it right. Everyone hates me because I'm fat, stupid, and all screwed up.”

“That's not true, Pokey,” said Ness. And he meant it with his whole heart. “I liked you a lot! There's also your papa, and your mama...and Picky, and I'm sure there are others, too...!”

Pokey paused, and he glanced at Ness. “Don't tease me,” he said.

“...I'm not.”

“Heh! You say you liked me?” Pokey scoffed. “You're such a liar! That can't possibly be true!”

Suddenly he threw back his head and thrust his arms into their wonderful cosmic surroundings. “Watch this!” he cried, as he tore into it like paper and viciously ripped it all away.

Their grammar school playground suddenly appeared, where Pokey was trying to practice on the vault bar and all the other kids were making fun of him. “What about then, eh, Ness?” Pokey growled. “...What about back then?!”

And there, trembling as he clutched the straps of his little backpack, his eyes wide in shock as he stood frozen and unable to move...who was that child? That little boy, with the visor of his red baseball cap pulled slightly askew, blue and yellow stripes on his shirt, denim shorts...and a bright red first base mitt tied to the zipper of his backpack...?

“Ooh...oh...oh...”

It was Ness. That child was Ness. And so, Ness's own fitful trembling channeled its way through to the child's feet. He had to find a way to lift those feet from the ground, he had to kick off with all his might...and once he turned around, he could never look back, he could never stop. He had to run, and keep running. He had to leave this place, he had to escape...!

“You ran away!” Pokey cried. “You ran away! You ran away!”

His voice tormented Ness from every direction at once. Pokey grew larger and larger until he filled the entire sky above, and with one hand on his hip, he pointed the other straight at Ness. “That's right, isn't it?” he sneered. “Isn't it, Ness? You got out of there as fast as you could, didn't you?!”

Covering his ears and turning away from the towering Pokey, Ness fled. He ran. He ran far away...then farther still. He pretended that he couldn't see any of this. Pretended that he didn't know anything about it. Oh, but no matter how hard he ran, he couldn't seem to get away! Even if he ran so hard his shoes wore out, his feet became stained with blood, and his heart burst...he knew he would never have gotten anywhere.

Fatty, fatty, Pokey's a big fatty!

Pokey the fat, dirty pig!

From high and low he could hear the voices of the older kids as they mocked Pokey, and he knew he would never escape it.

Hey...why would a pig be wearing such fancy clothes, anyway?

Take 'em off, take 'em off! Take 'em all off!

Fatty pig Pokey, dirty pig Pokey! Pokey the fat, buck-naked piggy! Hah!

“Stop it...stop...”

Ness pulled his hands away from his ears, balled his fists tight at his sides, and turned around. Panting, he struggled to catch his breath. “Stop...stop it, please,” he muttered. He spoke so quietly that the words barely left his mouth at all. And yet, those older kids who were gathered around the vault bar turned to look at him with surprise on their faces.

Who's the little brat? Hey, kid. What did you say, just now? One of the larger boys approached Ness. He seemed to want to pick a fight. Hmm? I asked what you said. Try saying it again!

Pokey had collapsed, covered in sand and dirt. The older kids had been trying to take off his clothes, and his plump, flabby belly was fully exposed. His sausage-like fingers grasped at the sand as he lifted his head sluggishly. ...And then he saw Ness. His eyes snapped open in surprise...in shock. Then the light slowly faded from them, like an animal on the brink of death.

“Stop it...stop doing this,” Ness mumbled, as he shook his head. “That's enough. No more... Cut it out... You have to stop this... Stop it, now! Please, I'm begging you, stop this!” His trembling tongue felt steadier. He could say it louder, now...he could say it stronger.

“STOP IIIIIT!” he yelled at last, as loud as he could. And just as he did...

Baaaaaaang!

The sun burst, the earth trembled, the sky shattered, and a shower of blood gushed from the group of older kids. Thick and eerie black clouds swirled into a vortex, and thunder rang out high and low through an atmosphere that boiled like a witch's cauldron. Violent lighting lashed like celestial whips against the old schoolhouse. Windowpanes smashed to pieces, classrooms crumbled in silence, and people fell to the ground one after another. Children throughout the playground were assailed by a whirlwind as sharp as knives. There was a child whose hands and feet were ripped off with overwhelming force, and then something like an explosion tore them to pieces. There were screams...cries...sobs... There was a girl reaching out and crying, “Someone, please help me!”...as half of her face had been brutally torn away. “It hurts, it hurts!” cried a young boy, his entrails hanging loose as he clutched his stomach and sobbed. A pale and motionless arm protruded from beneath the rubble. There was a child whose clothes had been torn to rags, walking unsteadily until suddenly they stopped, dropped to their knees, pitched forward and fell. As their face rebounded off the pavement, they became still.

“Wh...what is this?” Ness cried, in shock. “Who would...who would do something this terrible...?” With a small cry of realization, he looked up. “...Was it you, Pokey...?!”

“Hey, now...don't go throwing the blame around like that!” Pokey replied. “It wasn't me! ...But, it is incredible, isn't it? I'm amazed! You're doing wonderfully, Ness! Ah-hahahahahahhaha!”

Pokey's grating cackle echoed through the darkness. His belly shook as he laughed. “Here, have a look!” In one of his hands, he clutched that eerie golden statue and he proudly held it up high. “The one who did all this, Ness, was you. You did this. The Mani Mani here just took a little bit of your pride and joy, that sigh, or shy, or spy, or whatever you call it...those weird powers you have...and it used them in your place!”

“...What are you saying?”

And then, that shining statue...oh, how do I describe it? ...It warped, it melted, it changed. Before their very eyes, it changed from the form of a frightening demon to the form of a sweetly-smiling Ness. Sweetly? No, that's not quite right. Is there such a thing as a frightening smile? Even though it was smiling, and even though that smile was certainly the carefree smile of a young child...it felt as though something terribly evil, something cold, was hidden behind it.

“That's right,” said Pokey. “It was no one else but you. Ah, weren't you just thinking, I want this to end, I don't want to see this? Well, that's exactly why the very loyal Mani Mani caused all that destruction on your behalf, isn't it? In other words, you're the one who lost control, and this was one hundred percent your fault!”

Pokey grinned, and he began to toss the golden statue playfully from one hand to the other.

“As a baseball player,” he went on, “I'm sure you understand how hard it is to play at your very best during an entire live game, don't you? This thing is a device that can ensure that you will! It's a very amusing toy, don't you think? And it's been doing such a fine job, wouldn't you say? Thanks to this thing, everything's been going unbelievably perfect for me ever since I got my hands on it! And I even let you use it, despite the fact that I don't like to share it with anyone else! Aren't you grateful I allowed you to see something that so few others have seen?”

So that's it. ...That's what all of this was, Ness thought. At last, he felt that he understood. This Mani Mani statue, which he had thought was a machine that would infinitely amplify a person's desires, was really just a device that fully unleashed a person's truest potential.

It feels great to unleash your truest potential, to be performing at your highest possible limit. To hit a home run each and every time you stepped up to the plate, or to always throw the perfect pitch...of course that would be awesome. If each and every shot you took was the luckiest possible one, then you'd never lose a single game.

But...but...

But there's no point in playing baseball like that, Ness thought, resolutely. You'd just be hitting non-stop. Scoring over and over again like a one-man army. Even if you set all kinds of new world records, I don't think it would be any fun at all!

But how did Pokey end up with such a thing to begin with? Where did he find it?

It must have been that night... The night when the meteorite fell on the mountain behind their houses.

Because ever since then, Pokey had been capable of such unbelievable things. He'd gained weight at an incredible rate. And back when they'd dealt with the hamburger chaos in Fourside, the broken Mini-Mini Mani Manis all turned out to be made from pieces of that very meteorite.

On top of that, at around the same time that night, Pokey had become a host for the seed of Giygas. That's what Buzz Buzz had said. And someone else had mentioned something about a “birth”. It appeared as though Pokey was destined to become a mother to Giygas.

...So then......

The Mani Mani must have been brought here by Giygas! Ness thought.

That thing's purpose must be to protect the human who would be helping to raise Giygas for that short while. ...To provide for them.

Could it be something like...how that witch used a house made of candy to lure in and delight children, in order to fatten them up and make them into a delicious meal...?!

Ness couldn't help but shudder.

“Pokey!” he cried. “You have to stop this! Throw that thing away! It's dangerous!”

“What's that?” Pokey replied, with a smirk. “Heh heh. I couldn't do that even if I wanted to! This thing belongs to me! I couldn't just give it to anyone else!”

“Throw it away, you idiot!” Ness barked.

He grabbed Pokey by his arm. Pokey struggled clumsily and tried to keep the Mani Mani statue away from him, but Ness could almost get his fingers on it...could almost touch it. All he'd have to do is touch it, if only he could reach it...and then he could destroy it with his PSI Rockin', like he did with all those Mini-Mini versions!

Because of all his pent up energy, Ness's outstretched fingertips sparked with little flashes of electrical discharge.

“Th...that tickles!” stammered Pokey. Apparently, the sparks had hit him right in the most sensitive part of his underarm. “Hyuk, hyuk...uwaugh, stop! Don't touch it! Let go! I said let go...! Let GOOOO!”

...Ness reached the statue at last.

He concentrated his thoughts. He prayed with only one word...

...BREAK!

And at just that moment...

The dream was broken. It splintered. It shattered to pieces. The instant Ness's fingers had reached the horrible golden skin of that statue and he unleashed a finishing blow with his PSI Rockin', this cheap illusion created by the Mani Mani, which had been powered by the chaos of this rift between the many universes, vanished without a trace.

“Ohh...uuhnn...”

Slowly the Ness R. came to his senses. Electricity pulsed through his mechanical heart. He became aware that his metallic body was lying on the ground. He was on the stairway in that place where he had fought the Carbon Dog...but the bright glow of the stairs themselves and the little beads of light that had been flying all around them were gone. Now the stairs seemed to be made of jet-black, pitch-black, pure-black lumps of carbon, which reminded him of pencil lead.

“Ness! You're awake!” said the Paula R., as she took his hand and shook it.

“What the heck happened to you?!” shouted the Jeff R. He had opened Ness' robotic head. “I'm sorry, I tried fiddling around in there a bit. I thought you had shorted out or something, and I wanted to check.”

“You lost consciousness,” the Poo R. added, quietly. “But...you weren't here. All that was left behind was this...an empty iron shell.”

“I'm sorry I worried you all,” said the Ness R. “How long was I out for?”

“About twenty minutes, I think,” the Paula R. replied.

“No way! It was three hours!” said the Jeff R.

“In total, it was about one lifetime,” argued the Poo R. “Specifically, that of a tree cricket.”

“I see,” said the Ness R, as he stood up. “I think time seems to flow differently here for each person.” As a habit left over from when he'd had a human body, he tried to clear his head by shaking it...and suddenly he saw something that startled him. “Wh...what is that?!” he cried.

“Huh? What's what?”

“Hm?”

“Waah?! I don't like the looks of that!”

They stared in amazement. What was that pink, flabby thing, filling up an entire corner of the darkness in this rift in time? It couldn't be... But...could it?

The four of them had the same thought at almost the exact same time, and they all looked at one another.

The pink, flabby thing seemed soft and pliant. It was an extremely sickly-looking color, like a slug that had spent its entire life in a place where it was never properly exposed to the light of the sun. Patches of short, soft, golden hairs grew here and there, and wrinkles gathered in places. Something that resembled sweat was slowly but steadily oozing from the depths of these wrinkles, and it gave them the impression that this was...was it flesh? Skin? Was this...a bare naked body, covered in frills of excess fat...as obese as it was possible to be?!

The Poo R., who was still lighter on his feet than any of the others despite now having a body made of metal, swiftly approached the thing. With his fingertips trembling in revulsion, he poked at this pink wall that stood in their way. And with a bo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yoing~, it jiggled for what seemed like an eternity.

“...Just as I thought...” said the Jeff R.

“Is it Pokey?” the Ness R. whispered.

“...You're kidding,” muttered the Paula R. “...You're kidding, right? Someone tell me it's not true!” She wrung her hands in dismay. “I just can't believe...that a human...a human being...could become something like this!”

“...Unnhh...what the? Knock it off with all that yapping! If I let you run your mouths, you get cocky and think you can say whatever the hell you want, huh!?” A voice came from somewhere within the fleshy wall. “Ugh, shut up...just shut up! What's your problem, anyway? And what's with those hideous get-ups? You guys really are stupid!”

Boing, bo-yo-yo-yo-yoing! The pink wall wiggled and bounced.

His massive back, which resembled an overly-detailed snowman, swung away from them, and now they could see his belly, which was so swollen it looked as if he had swallowed the moon. His arms and legs were covered with so much excess fat that it seemed he couldn't bend his elbows and knees. Like a doll made out of balloons, his limbs stuck out in front of him with a strange stiffness.

“Pokey...?” said the Ness R., timidly. “Is that really you...Pokey?”

“And so what if I am?” came the reply. “...Damn, Ness, you really are annoying! I can't believe you had the nerve to destroy my priceless treasure! I was having such a pleasant, wonderful dream...but now I remember exactly what you did!”

“Whoa, what the?!”

“Everything's shaking!”

“He's on the attack, be careful!”

Wiggle...waggle...wham! As the enormous Pokey swung those arms and legs he could not bend and thrust out his round belly, the very atmosphere itself was crushed and distorted, and it wobbled and vibrated wildly! And that's when they realized it...this pink wall was all around them! Just like those rooms in a jail where they put prisoners who may be a danger to themselves and others...they were completely enclosed by these soft, pink, fleshy walls! And all of it was a part of Pokey. Like miniature toys on a trampoline, the four robots were so easily tossed, flung, and bounced around!

“...Damn it,” growled the Ness R. He tried to focus his mind. “...P...S...I...Rockiiiin'!” At almost the same time, the Jeff R. snapped back the joints in his wrists, revealing the heads of several missiles. “Firing rockets~!” he cried.

However...

SPHAAAAAAAANG!

GA-SWOOOOSH!

“Whoa...aaaaughh~!”

“Wh...what the heck?! It all bounced back!”

Neither the Ness R.'s PSI power nor the Jeff R.'s missiles could break through those fleshy walls! The PSI Rockin' jolted the atmosphere within all that pink flesh and sent something like an electric shock through all four of their electronic brains. Some of their wiring made a crackling sound and then burnt out entirely. ...And the missiles bounced around from wall to wall, like squash balls! The four of them ducked and dodged and threw themselves on the ground, trying desperately to evade them. In the end, the missiles ran into one another and caused a huge explosion! And if the Paula R. and Poo R. hadn't been so quick to gather everyone together and spread out a PSI barrier, all four would have been turned to scrap in an instant!

It appeared that even with their powers and weapons, they wouldn't be able to defeat Pokey in this bizarre state he'd ended up in.

“Ugh...uugh... This is...this is no joke...”

“He's quite a challenge...”

“This isn't fair! He's too strong!”

“Ah-hahahaha, serves you right!”

Pokey was really throwing his weight around...and he certainly had enough of it to spare! As he laughed, all of his flesh undulated in waves. Wriggling and wobbling, the walls shook violently. None of it moved very quickly, but still, the sheer mass of it was overwhelming. In terms of poundage, he must have weighed at least a hundred times as much as all four robots put together!

Those four souls had conquered so many foes in the past...but how could they possibly win against an opponent like this?

Ahh, I see now...thought the Ness R. He suddenly remembered the things Buzz Buzz had told him. ...That's why he told me I had to destroy him that night...right then and there...

“Gwah-hahahaha, so, is it finally sinking in?” Pokey cackled. “In the end, Ness, you'll never be able to defeat me! Gyah-hahahaha!”

Boing-boing...boooing! Swish-swoosh-squish! Oh dear...suddenly they realized that this place was inside Pokey! A place where Pokey could have his own way–a stage set all for himself...!

Deep within all that very unpleasant pink flesh, the four children, or, I should say, the four robots, were being hurled, jostled, and flung...up and down, right and left...tossed around in every possible direction. The very space around them morphed and contorted dizzyingly. It closed itself around them, pulled itself thin, and squashed them flat!

“Aah! ...No...no more...hurk! I'm...I'm gonna puke!” the Paula R. cried, as she tried desperately to stand. “Oh, but, that's right...I can't actually puke...even though I feel this terrible... I don't even have a stomach anymore...waah!”

“I won...der...if he's as...massive...as a bla...ck hole,” the Jeff R. pondered aloud. “...Whoa!” He collided with the Poo R., and each held out their hands in an attempt to help the other up with a little “Sorry, sorry!” Then they were instantly torn away from each other again.

“And...every...time he moves.” the Jeff R. went on, “the direc...tion of gravitational...force changes, too... Which is weird...wah!” ...They had no way to fight back!

“Everyone, hang in there!” cried the Ness R., as he raised his fists. “There has to be something...something we can do! There has to be some way left!”

“Hah-hahahaha! Like hell there is, don't be ridiculous!” Pokey sneered. His laughter was growing even cockier. “Hmph! Now what? You're always trying to show off...always giving me such a hard time. You've really been getting in my way, Ness! But in the end, this is all your powers amount to? My, my, what a pity... Well then, for your own sake, should I make you all disappear? I'm getting pretty tired of looking at something so pathetic.”

“Harmony,” said the Poo R., in a low voice. Even at a time like this, his tone and manner of speaking did not betray any suffering. This was probably the result of all his years of training. “What we must seek now is harmony. Cooperation. If the four of us, who have abandoned our bodies, can bring our spirits together in perfect harmony, we may be able to come up with something incredible–an amazing secret battle plan.”

“You can talk all the nonsense you want,” said Pokey, “but no matter what you do, it's too late!” He roared with laughter, and those undulating walls writhed and squirmed and wiggled even more. “Now then, here's a twist!” With an unsettling bwwwonngg! sound, the ceiling and floor stretched into an elliptical shape, which began to contort and twirl at both ends. It felt just like being inside of a soft, pink football as someone wrung it out like a dishrag. “...Now, DIIIIEEEE!”

The space inside was shrinking...compressing... But thanks to this, the four of them were also being brought closer together. Squish-squish...squash! Mush-mush...mash! Under all that pressure, they clung tightly to one another. Metal scraped against metal, and face rubbed against face. They reached out with their arms and legs in search of even the slightest bit of open space, and they ended up hopelessly entangled. ...The trains on the Yamanote Line in Tokyo, Japan rarely got this cramped, even during rush hour!

“...Grrraahhh,” growled the Ness R. He braced his iron limbs, focused his iron will, and pushed with all his might against those pink walls. If he still had his human form, his face would certainly be bright red, he'd be covered in sweat, and his adrenaline would be pumping at full throttle. “...Unnhh...damn it... I can't...take any more... This is it...!”

“Anesthetic...sleep aid... Ahh, a muscle relaxant!” cried the Jeff R. The fingers on his right hand had become hypodermic needles, and he was throwing every type of medication he had at those walls. ...But nothing seemed to have any effect at all. “...Well, I may as well try this one–strong laxative...!”

Grumble-grumble-grumble! Terrifying vibrations coursed through those walls, but other than that, nothing happened.

The Poo R. recited a spirited sutra. “...Ohn-ai-kan-dah-mah-sah-muh-sah-pah, eih-ah-ra-un-ken-hon-sah-wah-ka...”

...Crunch...crack......CRRRUNCH!

“Auugh!”

With an unsettling sound, the Ness R.'s fingers were crushed. His wrists were shattered. His arms bent back limply. All at once, the space grew even narrower, and their metal bodies were pressed together as tightly as if they had been glued to one another. Their three-dimensional bodies became flat...curves became straight lines. And yet, that crushing pressure never ceased. Their proper forms had been entirely lost. You could no longer tell where one of them ended, and another began.

“Ohh...ahh... Oh, God,” the Paula R. whispered. “Please...please lend us...lend us your strength...!”

Paula's prayer...her soul, imploring with all of its PSI powers...resonated through each of their four bodies, which had become one. Without even realizing it, Ness, Jeff, and Poo had begun praying, too. They drew in as close as they could to Paula's heart...to her soul. Their bodies were so strongly, so tightly joined together now that even if that terrible pressure were to disappear, they could never be separated from one another again.

“...God...please!”

–Across time, beyond the sky, and at the other end of the thread of fate...

The Mr. Saturns in Saturn Valley experienced a sudden rush of emotions they had never felt before. Instinctively, they all began to gather together. They huddled in the middle of their village, touching their noses together and joining hands. And then, they all began to pray.

The beach in Summers... On the white sands...

Wearing black swimming trunks, a monochrome black Hawaiian shirt and, of course, black sunglasses, Lucky of the Runaway Five was dozing off in a beach chair. Suddenly, with a twitch, he jumped to his feet.

“Hey, Nice?” he said. “...Did you just call me?”

“I didn't call you!” Nice replied, cocking his head in confusion. “But I thought...did you call me, just now?”

Surprisingly, all of the Runaways, who had been napping beside one another (and who usually did not rouse easily, even if the hotel in which they were staying was on fire) woke straight up.

“Hey...hey, big bros,” said Gucci, the youngest of the group, with a hint of fear in his voice. “I just had a dream about Ness... In my dream, he was in some sort of terrible danger. And so, he was calling out to me.”

“...Me too.”

“...And me.”

“...Same here.”

“You know...come to think of it,” said Lucky, with a snap of his fingers, “I just realized I had a dream like that, too...but in mine, it wasn't the Red Cap Boy who called out to us, it was the Pretty Little Girl!”

“...Oh, how terrible...”

“What do we do, big bro?”

“Hey, everyone, get out your instruments,” Lucky commanded, as he took off his sunglasses. “They called out to us, and we're gonna answer them–with a passionate live performance from the Runaway Fiiiive! We'll put everything we've got into this beach-side freestyle session! Heeeere we goooooo!”

As their high-spirited performance began, drowsing beach-goers perked up almost instantly, those who had been walking along the seaside road stopped in their tracks, and ocean bathers hurried back onto the shore.

Yeeeaahh, yeahh, woooo! Explosive, swelling cheers could be heard as far away as the Stoic Club. The club's manager, Mr. Noir, paused as he cleaned a glass. Marimari the actress raised her sleepy eyes. And that literary master, Truman Ahody, who was banging away at a typewriter with all his might, gave a small, curious hum and rose suddenly to his feet.

In Twoson, all in the exact same instant, everyone from the Happy Happyists to the darling preschool children suddenly thought of Paula, and their hearts raced with thoughts like, “I wonder how she's doing,” and, “I hope she's okay.” Just then, at the Maurice School, right in the middle of a proficiency test, all the young men of this prestigious institution suddenly cried, “Jeff!” “Ohh, Jeff!”, then dashed over to the window and gazed into the horizon, much to the bewilderment of their supervisor.

Mr. Montague, who was operating a power shovel at the excavation site in the desert, Captain Mone, who was leisurely turning the wheel of his beautiful sailing ship in mid-cruise, and Polly the parrot all experienced a similar mysterious feeling. Suddenly filled with strangely spiritual emotions, they all began to pray for the safety of Ness and his friends.

Tessie in Lake Tess, the monkeys in the jungle, the Tenda tribe, the people of Dalaam, those large and taciturn men at Stonehenge... Every one of them suddenly thought of Ness and his friends, and they prayed with all of their hearts for their safety, their health, and their happiness.

And then...

“Doctor!”

“Oh, goodness... What is this, this uneasiness? Hmm...my pulse is unusually accelerated!”

“Yeah, my heart's beating fast, too. And I suddenly have such a terrible, sad feeling...”

“Jeff's face came to mind, and he seemed so miserable...like he was about to collapse at any minute...”

“Paula! Paula!”

“Hey, what's wrong with you? Why are you shouting like that, all of a sudden?”

“Because...well, you must have heard it, just now! It was Paula's voice!”

“Huh? You heard that too...? Then...it wasn't just my ears playing tricks on me?”

“Mama, mama! Come quick, King is acting weird! He just started howling out of nowhere! And... It feels...like my heart's being squeezed tight, all of a sudden!”

“Yes, Tracy...mama feels it, too...”

“I wonder what happened...? Oh, big bro...”

Far away, on a distant continent, and at a certain, terribly exotic-looking burger stand...

“...Ness...”

The manager of the stand, in his chef's hat with its red and white stripes, suddenly dashed away from the counter. He pushed his way through the orderly lines of his startled customers in their traditional native clothing.

He ran through intersections. He paid no attention to traffic signals. He wasn't fazed at all by the loud honk-honk-ing of car horns.

He made it to the top of a hill overlooking the ocean, under a sky that spread as far as the eye could see.

...And he cried out,

“Hey, Neeeess! Can you hear me? NESS!”

Hang in there, Ness! You can't give up!

And Paula, and Jeff, and Poo, too!

Everyone's prayers made it through. Prayers from all over the world. ...Oh, and of course, that includes your prayers.

Yup! It's true!

Your prayers got through to them, too...!

And then...

That small heap of broken junk...that clump of scrap metal...those robots, whose four bodies had become one...

...Tick......

FWOOOSH~!

...They began to burn. They went up in pure, white, serene flames. With light, with heat, and with an overwhelming energy, those flames began to spread! Oh, it was those little beads of light, from each of those enchanting fountains of life!

And now, what on earth were they doing...? Just as the four of them were about to be crushed to death, this rushing stream of lights, which had appeared to be able to pass through just about anything and everything, seemed to be pushing out against that flesh, against that skin, and opening up a space for them. The twisted and contorted pink walls gently began to unwind, bulging outward as they reversed their direction. That light seemed to be softly, gently piling up against the walls, the floor, and the ceiling...never moving rapidly, but steadily forcing it all aside, with an overwhelming power!

“...Ugaaaaahhh!” Pokey wailed. “Wh-what the... Stop...! What are you doing...? St...STOP IT, please stooooppp!” He clutched his stomach and writhed in agony. “It...it hurts...it hurts, it hurts! ...I'm...I'm gonna burst! Uwaaaauugghh!”

And then...

…...Pop!

Everything suddenly turned inside out. ...You've probably taken your socks off so roughly that their insides became their outsides, right? Well it felt like that. Imagine if that were to happen, but to everything around you.

“We're...out,” said the very dazed Ness R.

“Huh? Oh, so we are!” said the Paula R. “And on top of that...how wonderful! We're back to how we were before!”

They were beyond the rift in time, amid the mysterious multiple axes of space and time.

Hunched over in front of them, holding his stomach and moaning in agony, was that huge, pink mound of flesh. Far too fat...but clearly human in appearance, it was Pokey. No matter how hard they looked, they could no longer see those towering fleshy walls.

“It appears that he didn't actually transform that body of his, after all. I think our perception was simply distorted,” said the Poo R.

“I think you're right. And, I think time and space are relative,” the Jeff R. replied. “After all, this is the place from which all the variables of infinity diverge, or in other words, the trunk from which all of the branches of the Tree of Possibilities grow.”

“Stop talking about things I can't understand!” said the Paula R., putting her hands on her hips. “In other words, we were tricked by the powers of an evil wizard, how about that?”

“...Well, I mean, you can put it that way if you prefer, but...”

The mound of flesh looked up at them, and the Ness R. ran to its side.

“Hey, Pokey?” he cried. “Pokey, what's wrong? Are you okay?”

“Ugh...n-no, I'm not okay,” Pokey replied. “I'm not okay at all...uugghhh...” Cold sweat ran down his dumpling-like face as he whined miserably. “It hurts...it hurts, I can't stand it... There's something...in...my stomach, something......uguuhh!”

Violent shudders coursed through Pokey's body as he retched, and then...SPLOSH!...with terrible force, he vomited about a bucket's worth of yellow-green liquid all at once. And then...

“Eeeeeeek!”

“Wha-”

“Uwaaugh, something's coming out!”

From inside of Pokey's mouth, which he was trying so desperately to keep closed, there came a thick leg. ...A very solid-looking leg, covered in hairs, like that of a spider. Then two, then three, then four...four legs in total, squirming and writhing! “What the...? What the heck is that thing?!”

“It's Giygas...that must be Giygas,” said the Ness R., sounding heartbroken. “Giygas took Pokey as his host, and little by little, he's been growing inside of him. And now...now he must be hatching...”

But what a foul creature this was! What an abomination!

“Ah-guuhh...ahgaaaaahh!” Pokey wailed. His lips were wrenched apart from within, and it seemed that any moment now they would tear! “'Iih ih...auhau, Geegah! Ah hou ee ah gehin ahon huh huine uhuh nowh!”

“'This is awful, Giygas...I thought we were getting along just fine until now',” the Poo R. translated for them, rather plainly.

“If that's the case, I don't think there's anything we can do,” said the Jeff R., quietly. “A parasitic organism does not usually harm its host. They may steal away a hosts' nutrition, but if they were to kill that host, they would then have to seek out another. Colon bacteria, or something like Lactobacillus bifidus, for example, are actually helpful to their human hosts, and contribute toward their welfare, so that they may each live a long and healthy life. But...there are also things like parasitic wasps, who swiftly paralyze prey that are especially nutritious, like caterpillars and things like that, and then lay their own eggs inside them. If they were to kill the caterpillar right then and there, then it wouldn't remain fresh. So the caterpillar is still alive while it is being eaten by the parasitic wasp larvae. It is used as both food and shelter, and it is continually being eaten from within, beginning when the eggs hatch, and ending when the larvae are able to fly on their own.”

“...It does look like that's what's happening here,” said the Paula R., as she shivered in revulsion.

“Uuughh!” Pokey groaned. “Graaaaahh! ...Wueeh...hill hee... Wueeh...ughh...!”

“'Kill me...please,'” relayed the Poo R. He turned and gave a significant look to the Ness R. “He's asking this...of you. He is begging you...Ness.”

“Wueeh...uah...uah eh ill eh-haa ay hoey... Hill ough oh ah, eh ah ee... Ah ohn uah uuh eecoh ah oh-haaaaa...!”

“'Please...while it's still inside my body. Kill both of us, it and me...I don't want to become a monster.' That is what he is saying,” the Poo R. translated quietly.

“...Pokey,” muttered the Ness R. He stumbled forward, and with his metal hand, his metal fingers, he gently caressed Pokey's convulsing, writhing, ghastly pink body.

He remembered that one summer day. The river, sparkling and shimmering, which was all their own. Their secret fishing spot. That fish, jumping and splashing at the end of their fishing line. It was so big... It was really, really big, wasn't it...? “Pokey...I'm sorry... I'm sorry I let you suffer...”

Oh...if I had only made up my mind sooner...maybe you wouldn't have had to go through all this...!

Robots are not able to cry. They are unable to shed anything like tears.

But Ness's eyes could no longer see. All that spread before them now was a bright light–the dazzling sunlight they had seen that summer morning at their own little brook.

...The wind. The wind was blowing. It caressed his cheek, gently and softly.

The thin fishing rod he held suddenly jerked forward. The handle was slick with sweat, and he felt he might lose his grip at any moment. If he didn't brace with all of his weight, he knew he'd be pulled straight into the river.

“You got it, keep pulling! That's it, hang in there!”

“Pokey, Pokey...I can't, I just can't... I should give up, this is the best I can do!”

“Don't be stupid! ...He's desperate, too, this is life or death for him!”

With a glittering splash, the trout leapt into the air. What a strong tug! And what a sturdy body. How beautiful life can be, and nature, too...

“Don't whine. Don't give up. And don't go easy on him, either. Once you've started something, you have to fight to the very end! Otherwise, nothing has any meaning. So, I'm begging you, Ness, turn it all around with a home run. Show me what you've got!”

“Turn it all...around...?”

Just as soon as he heard those words...

Yeeeaaaahhh! Wooooooo! ...There came the murmurs and cheers of a crowd. Thunderous applause. Bleachers packed with fans.

Ah, he was in a baseball stadium!

Before he even realized it, Ness found himself stepping into the batter's box.

It was the bottom of the ninth inning, and the other team led by three points. They already had two outs, but the bases were loaded. On first, there was the swift-footed Poo. On second, the super-intelligent Jeff. And on third, the very popular Paula. The ball count, three-two. This was it, the very end–he only had one ball left, just one chance to turn it all around.

...Thu-thump...thu-thump...thu-thump...

He could hear the pounding of his own beating heart.

Ness adjusted his helmet, gripped the bat firmly, and swung his hips to get into position.

...Thu-thump...thu-thump...thu-thump.

The opposing team's pitcher, whose face was obscured by dazzling light, picked up the rosin bag and sent up little puff, puffs of white powder. He raised both hands above his head and paused for a moment. He looked toward Ness. Stared him down. There was a sense that he was grinning.

...Thu-thump...thu–

The pitcher kicked up sand from the mound as he lifted his leg, and then...he let it fly!

A speck of light suddenly appeared in the sky, and it grew larger before his eyes. From the size of a pinpoint, to the size of a grain of rice, to the size of a bean, to the size of a ping-pong ball, the dazzling light glittered steadily, shooting out vibrant flares as it headed straight for him!

This blazing orb of fire was a fastball shooting right across home plate! It was a little high, and a little outside, a perfect pitch...he was really going all-out against his opponent!

There was no yesterday, no tomorrow. Just one long moment of eternity.

“Whooooaaaa!”

Ness began to swing the bat. He focused his entire body and soul, and stared straight at the ball. Just swing as hard as you can, was all he kept telling himself. ...Just swing, swing, swing...you got this! ...Yes, there was no doubt! He felt the resistance! He'd caught it dead-center...!

The incredible impact left a wonderful feeling in his hands as the ball grew smaller and smaller before his eyes. It was disappearing from view now, soaring farther and farther away, off past the electronic scoreboard...off past the stadium grounds...

...Off to a place that wasn't really anywhere on this earth, or beyond it.

“I did it...” Ness said quietly. “I did it...I really did it... I did iiiit!”

Chapter 10 – Heading Home

“–I did iiiiiii...iiit?”

Ness suddenly realized he was sitting in a chair, in an unfamiliar room in an unfamiliar building. On a large screen in front of him, which took up his entire view, an unfamiliar baseball player was making his way around the bases. No...wait... He wasn't an unfamiliar player...far from it! That was Mister, in his much younger days...wasn't it?!

Mister was one of the greatest baseball players in the world, and Ness had a great deal of respect for him. He had thick eyebrows, large eyes, and a very manly face with traces of stubble. Smiling proudly, and in a way that could even be described as care-free, he was waving at all the fans in the packed stands as he made his way to home plate. He was handed a bouquet of flowers, and all of his teammates rushed over to him just as the crowd broke out into wild cheers!

Gradually, this scenario all began to make sense. It was that very famous game, when the emperor of Japan was in attendance. This appeared to be footage of the moment when Mister turned the whole game around and recovered the team from a hopeless situation with a single home run, and made the entire world collectively gasp. From that day on, Mister was on the fast track to becoming a brilliant star. Ness knew this. He understood this. But...

“...But why does it look so different?!”

That was very old newsreel footage, Ness thought. It wasn't in bright colors like this...and it wasn't on a 3D screen, either!

But more importantly, why am I here? Why am I just...sitting around watching my favorite play by Mister...?

“Aren't we supposed to be...frozen..?”

There came a whisper from right beside him. He turned to look, and there were three other chairs, all in a row. And in them were Paula, Jeff, and Poo! But they weren't robots anymore. And they certainly weren't frozen corpses, either.

“Where are we?”

“I feel like...there may have been a room like this in my father's lab,” said Jeff. “But...”

The four of them looked at one another, bewildered.

“Have we...crossed over?” asked Poo, solemnly. “...Past the border of all living things, I mean. That evil presence is gone. This can't be the same world we departed from.”

“But then, why is Mister here?” said Ness.

“And you guys look like you did before all this,” said Paula, knitting her brows. “Oh no, what about me? How do I look? Have I changed? ...Am I, maybe...even more beautiful than before?”

Ness and Poo waved their hands as if to say, no, you haven't changed at all!

“Multiple universes...parallel worlds...” Jeff muttered. He thought, and then he thought some more before he opened his mouth again. “The branching out of all histories... Perhaps this is one of the variations of all that has happened. ...A new, alternate world.”

“But, then...”

“What happened to the world we were in before? Did it disappear?”

“No, it's not like that,” Jeff replied. “This world and that world would be one and the same, except for a few slight variables...”

Sha-zaaaaaaaa!

There was a terrible sound. With a gasp, the three of them turned to look, and static had appeared on the screen before them. Something like multi-colored raindrops began to race across it.

Oh, I know what this means! Ness thought, horrified. Suddenly the broadcast will be hijacked, and the evil aliens will declare war on all of us...!

However...

“...Sorry, that's it, it's over!” said a voice. With a thud!, the door swung open, and in walked someone with a very round, pleasant face, smiling so bright that his eyes were squinting. He wasn't anything like a diabolical alien, at all!

“Apple Kid...?!”

“So, how did you like it?” Apple Kid asked. He turned off the screen using a remote control he held in his hand, and he passed a sheet of paper to each of the four of them. “Now, please! Write things out as thoroughly as possible. ...And I can even give you suggestions!”

The three of them looked down in confusion at the sheets of paper.

Thank you very much for your time, and your cooperation.

What are your thoughts about Apple Kid's latest invention, which makes it possible to virtually experience fondly-remembered events from the past–the “If I Could Live it All Over Again” Machine?

Please answer the following questions.

1. Did it leave an impression on you?

It was amazing! / It was so-so. / It was boring.

2. Was there any discomfort?

None at all. / A little bit. / It was excruciating.

3. Going forward, what kind(s) of scene(s) would you like to experience using this machine? Please be specific.

“...Is this...a survey...?”

“Just fill it out, quickly!” cried the mouse genius Algernon, as his little face appeared from within Apple Kid's lab coat pocket. “They'll be coming to pick you guys up any minute now!”

“Pick us up?” Once again, the four of them could only look at one another with anxious expressions.

Nervously, Ness spoke on the group's behalf. “Did you say, 'pick us up'?”

“Huh? I thought it was supposed to be today...wasn't it?” Kid replied, as he opened a panel on the machine and put away a software disc. “...The airship is coming in from Dalaam soon, isn't it? They have to start preparations for the coronation ceremony, so they need you to come back home, soon. Mister Yee-soo-chi has missed you quite a lot, you know, Prince Poo. This summer vacation has been fun, but...well, I guess all good things must come to an end, eventually.”

Kid turned and looked over each of their four faces, his thin eyebrows furrowing slightly.

“I'm really gonna miss you guys, when you all go home...”

Sure enough, they had somehow found themselves in that certain laboratory deep in the heart of Foggyland. But the man who was supposed to be in charge of it, Dr. Andonuts, didn't seem to be around. And my goodness, 'summer vacation'?! That was apparently the very reason the doctor was away. And there was no sign of Maxwell, or Tony, or that large, mysterious man, Cro, either. Kid and Algernon had explained that they were there all by themselves, “house-sitting” for Dr. Andonuts while he was away, and using the machinery at his lab to create all sorts of inventions while they were at it.

Before too long, a giant, floating airship shaped like an elephant arrived. In addition to Yee-soo-chi, there were officers and pages, a master of ceremonies, a woman who was there to help with all the minute details, children who were in charge of scattering flower petals for Prince Poo to walk over, and the prince's adorable bride, who appeared to be around seven years old and who dashed out excitedly to meet him.

The airship took off again as Kid and Algernon waved good-bye. Before doing anything else, Ness and his friends decided to try visiting Jeff's mother, in the suburbs of Threed.

Everyone on board seemed overly eager to care for their every need, and after it became apparent that they weren't going to show any restraint even after being asked to, the four of them hid themselves away in the king's quarters. It was a splendid room with full-length windows, perfect for sight-seeing. Mountains, hills, oceans... Huge cities filled with tall buildings... One by one they came into sight and then vanished behind them.

“Wow, so you're basically already married?” said Paula, as she shook her head defeatedly. “That's a little disappointing. If it were me, I think I'd feel like I missed out, or something.”

“I forgot all about it,” Poo replied, shaking his head, too. “Of course, I've known ever since Chai was born that she was betrothed to me, but...”

“Hey...is it so bad?” said Paula. “That girl is really cute. I'm sure you'll grow to love her.”

Poo remained silent, and he turned red up to his ears.

“And hey, if...just maybe...” Jeff added, trying to speak through his chuckles, “...Ness, and Paula...if you two get hitched someday...”

“Huh? W...wait a minute, Jeff!” stammered Ness.

“What do you mean by that?!” cried Paula.

“What are you two so upset about?” Jeff replied. “...I didn't say, 'to each other'! ...Don't you guys think you'll get married someday?”

That certainly shut them both up.

Jeff smiled mischievously.

“Well, maybe I'll be the one that fixes your broken electronic devices! ...Ah, we're already over the desert. It won't be long now, once we're past it. I wonder how she's doing...my mother. It's been a really long time since I've seen her...I wonder if she'll even recognize me. If things turn out to be incredibly different now...what should I do?”

“Don't worry,” said Ness, and he hugged Jeff around his shoulders. “I'm sure everything will be fine.”

“Hmm...I guess so,” said Jeff, as his smile began to stiffen. “But, still...I wonder if this is the right thing to do...or if it's not. Maybe it would have been better if I went straight to Winters, instead. Because, logically speaking, if I'm still wearing this uniform, then the Maurice School must still exist in this world. If I were to go to the dormitory, Tony would be there. And Maxwell, too, and everyone else. And even if...even if it turns out no one I know is there anymore...well, at least it's a place I'm familiar with, a place where I belong.”

“No...it's best this way,” Paula replied. “All of us should check on our mothers, first.” She suddenly stood up and walked over to the window, and she looked down at the yellow sands that rushed past beneath them. “Your mama's still your mama. Even if the whole world's been turned upside-down, even if everything has suddenly been shuffled like the cards in a poker game...there's no chance, none at all, that a mother wouldn't recognize her own child...!”

Just as she said this, they passed over that final stretch of desert.

With the airship anchored in a field nearby, the four of them set out on foot. They walked along a road lit by sunbeams trickling down through the treetops under a blue sky. The road was neatly lined with trees on either side, and cars rarely passed through. Heat haze mirages flickered here and there along the pavement. They climbed a gentle hill and turned a corner. Jeff was becoming nervous and pale, and he pointed at a house that looked as though it had come straight out of a fairy tale. It had a red roof and a chimney, and it was surrounded by a low, white picket fence.

Perched on top of the mailbox, which had a very home-made feel to it, was a large dragonfly. A sign that autumn was on its way.

The other three stopped near the fence. In the unlikely event that...well, they didn't even want to think about it, but if Jeff were to come upon a scene that were to break his heart, they were prepared to rush over and give him all the support he needed. If he wanted, he could come back with them to the airship. These were the thoughts that they kept in mind.

Turning back to look at his friends every few steps, Jeff finally made it to the front door. He took a deep breath. It took all of his strength for him to lift his hand...and then knock.

The person who answered the door had...wow! Such a huge belly!

“M...mama...?!”

“Oh, welcome home, Jeff!” said Jeff's mama. “This is perfect timing, a postcard just came for you from little Tony. You're going to be in the came class again this semester! He says he heard about it from Maxwell. Isn't that nice?”

“Er,” Jeff began. “...Uhm, mama...your very, uh, prominent belly...does that mean you're...?”

“Oh, yes, I am,” she replied. Even though she wasn't wearing any makeup, her skin had a bit of a glow to it, and her cheeks were rosy as she smiled. “I thought, there's no way!, because I'm so much older now, and I was a little too embarrassed to say it outright until I knew for sure, but...the truth is, you're going to have a little brother, Jeff!”

“A little brother?!” cried Jeff. He was stunned. “So...so then...who...who is the baby's papa?”

“Your father of course, silly!” Mrs. Andonuts replied, as she whacked Jeff's cheek playfully with the hem of her apron.

And at just that moment, with an “Oh, you're home, are you?”, a man with messy gray hair joined them from another room. It was Dr. Andonuts! But he wasn't in his usual white lab coat. He was wearing a very comfortable-looking cardigan, perfect for lounging around the house. On top of that...he very casually and very naturally wrapped his arms around Jeff's mother's waist. “So, how was your little field trip up to the lab? Did you all have fun?”

“Oh, and are those your friends, there?” said Mrs. Andonuts. “I'm glad you brought them to see us!” She waved to the other three, who stood outside with dazed looks on their faces. “You must be Ness, and the others! Thank you all for taking such good care of Jeff. Please, please, come on in.”

“And you should tell us all about it,” Dr. Andonuts added. “Your adventure, I mean. Your stories from around the world. We'd certainly love to hear them.”

“J...just a minute!” cried Jeff, and he hurried back out to his friends. “S...s...s-somehow,” he stammered, “in this world, it seems like my parents never got divorced at all! Papa and mama are both wearing the wedding rings they were supposed to have taken off years ago!”

“That's wonderful!”

“And get this,” Jeff went on. “It sounds like we were supposed to have been on some trip around the world for our summer vacation.”

“I see. So that's how we should try to play it off then, I guess.”

“...So, what should I do?” Jeff asked.

“No matter what you decide to do, you're going to be just fine,” said Ness, as he patted Jeff on the back. “Your papa and mama seem so wonderful! They cherish you very much. We should let you have some time alone with them.”

“Y...yeah,” said Jeff, and he walked back into the house. He let his mother and father know that Ness and the others wanted to get back to their own homes, as quickly as possible.

“I'm sure they do. But it's still a bit of a shame,” said Mrs. Andonuts.

“It's quite understandable, though,” said Mr. Andonuts, who seemed to be taking it in stride.

“Ah, but that reminds me,” said Mrs. Andonuts. “Last night, your mama had a dream about you, Jeff...and everyone else, too! God...or, well, something like a god, in the form of a rhinoceros beetle, was flying around all of us in circles, crying, 'Thank goodness, thank goodness!' And then, he gave your mama a very special message. He said that our unborn child would be a boy. And he also gave me a wonderful name for him!”

“...And what...what was it?” Jeff asked, excitedly.

His heart was beating so fast. He had a feeling he already knew what the name was going to be.

...And it left his mother's lips so unmistakably.

“...Jack!”

At the Polestar Preschool, all the young children were right in the middle of a very spirited coloring session. There was a slender man instructing the children in a fun and very silly way. He was wearing a jumpsuit covered in paint, and was very clearly the artsy-type. Once they got a good look at him, they could see that...oh my, it was the leader of the Happy Happyists, Mr. Carpainter!

When they realized that their beloved 'big sister' Paula had finally arrived back home, all of the children cheered and came running to her. Hearing her mother's happy cries, her father ran in from the other room.

“Oh, oh! My little tomboy is back home safe, is she?” said her father. Looking as if he were desperately trying to hide a rush of emotions, he hugged Paula tight, then, one at a time, he shook hands with Ness and Poo. With a piercing look in his eyes, he questioned them jokingly. “Hmm...? What's this? You didn't do anything you wouldn't be able to tell me about, now, did you? You followed the rules of group dating, right?”

“Oh you,” growled Paula's mother, and she stomped on his foot. “...I'm glad you're back, Paula. Did you have fun?”

“Yeah, of course!” Paula replied. Her cheeks were flushed with joy, and her golden curls bobbed as she giggled. Her papa and mama hadn't changed a bit! And neither had their preschool. Paula would be able to live her life in her very own way, just as she always had. Now that she was sure of this, all of her worries vanished. She turned back to Ness and Poo, and she chose her words carefully. “...It's been a wonderful summer. There were some rough times, but once we got through them, we all made great memories together. And I had an awesome and reliable boyfriend with me the entire time, no matter where we went!”

“Now, I won't scold you for it, so tell me the truth,” said Paula's father, as he held her gently. “Who do you like better, him, or me?”

“Oh, you!” cried Paula's mother.

“Ness!” Paula replied. And she stared straight at Ness as she went on. “I have to see you again soon, okay? ...And this time, I won't just wait around, either. I'll come find you! Alright?”

“Yeah, you should do that,” Ness replied. He felt a little bashful, but he nodded earnestly. “I live pretty close by. You can come over anytime. I'm sure I'll see you again, very soon!”

The airship was approaching the summit of Mount Onett.

“The meteorite is gone,” said Ness, with a sigh of relief. “And the observatory is still standing, just fine. It looks like none of that ever even happened. I think I understand... Since we went back and changed the past...Giygas was gone before he even got here.”

“It appears so,” said Poo. “It was all just a dream. An illusion that vanished upon waking.”

“But I won't forget it,” said Ness, as he balled his fist tightly. “I'll never, ever forget it.”

The airship landed gently beside the observatory.

After declining Poo's offer to accompany him, Ness walked down the gangplank alone. No matter what would happen, no matter what was waiting for him, he wanted to face it on his own. After watching that elephant-shaped craft fly off, he made his way down the winding mountain path.

As he arrived at the foot of the mountain, he saw two houses right next to one another. He paused and thought for a moment...and then he decided to go to Pokey's house, first.

He stood at the front door, trying to steady his racing heartbeat.

It all started here...he thought.

“Hello?” he called, as he knocked gently. “Uhm...It's Ness, from next door, I–”

“Yeees, who is iiit?” ...It was Picky who answered the door. “Oh, it's Tracy's brother,” he said. “Hello!”

“Is your brother...here?” Ness asked, as naturally and as casually as he could, in a tiny voice. How is Pokey doing? is what he really wanted to ask...but it was too painful for him to say that name outright.

However...

“My...brother?” said Picky, and his eyes went wide. “But I'm...an only child!”

Ness felt his body go cold. That must be it...that must be what happened... In the far distant past, in that space beyond the rift in time...Pokey had disappeared as well.

“You must be mistaken,” Picky went on, with a bit of cheekiness in his voice, “and I don't think my mama went and had any kids with anyone else, either.”

“...Sorry, that's not what I meant... Well...well, how is Mr. Minch doing?”

“...Hmm,” hummed Picky, and he put his hand to his chin. Posing like a bad actor playing a psychiatrist, he shook his head slowly from side to side in a very exaggerated way. “Ness, you know very well that my father has been in prison since last year, for the crimes of embezzlement, tax evasion, and fraud. Now it's just me and my mom. There's no one here except the two of us. ...But, if you're still suspicious, please, come on in, and have a look for yourself!”

Mr. Minch is...in prison...?

Ness was so shocked that he almost stumbled. But, if this was true, there was something else he had to make sure of.

“Well, then...uhm...I'm sorry to be asking you so many weird things, but...the Minch chain...the supermarkets, I mean...is your mom running them now?”

Picky moaned and reeled terribly, and for a short while he could only stare at Ness without saying a word, looking as though he were about to cry. When he finally spoke again, his voice sounded terribly wounded and suspicious. “Please don't play dumb,” he said. “The boss of the supermarket chain is...none other than your own father! And on top of that, he's also the president of the entire chain of Ness Burger restaurants, isn't he?! ...We're renting this house from him, too. Naturally, I figured someone would have wanted to drive off the family of the man who betrayed him, but...I guess we've just been neighbors for so long, and we've always gotten along so well, that–oh, oh no, you guys aren't planning to kick us out, are you?”

“Oh, no, no!” cried Ness. “I'm...I'm sorry, Picky! That's not what I meant at all...I'm so sorry! It's just...I'm...I'm a little confused right now, that's all. I guess I had a weird dream...or maybe I have a fever, or something.”

“Oh, okay then,” said Picky, with a huge sigh of relief. “Well, just tell Tracy I said hi, okay?”

“Of course,” Ness replied. Forcing himself to smile, he took hold of the doorknob. “Well, goodbye then. Take care!”

He shut the door and walked away, staggering slightly.

Right next door was his family's house, his own very familiar home...which for some reason had a very foreboding look to it.

But I have to go back, he thought. I have to find out...if anything has changed.

No matter how weird things may have gotten...I can't let myself go into shock.

At least it seems that Tracy is still there. She definitely exists...and papa, too! And papa is...the president of a company? I had no idea he'd become such an important person...!

Ohh...but...oh no...oh no...ohh, what about my mama?!

His heart ached with anxiety. He wanted to know as soon as possible, but he also didn't want to know at all. He was too afraid of what might be waiting for him.

He would be there in just a few steps, and that short distance seemed almost spiteful.

...You have to go in...just take a deep breath and go, Ness.

“I'm...I'm home!” he cried.

And as soon as he threw open the front door...

...Ness's heart quite literally jumped into his throat.

Standing there...with his round face and his blond hair, wearing his worn-out denim overalls and carrying some heavy-looking luggage, was...

“...Pokey...?”

“Oh!” cried the figure standing before him. “Welcome home, Ness!” He smiled, and dimples appeared on his plump cheeks. “Perfect timing! I just got home, myself.”

Ness's first thought, of course, was that this was Pokey, and he seemed to have responded to that name, but...could it really be? Was this really Pokey?

He certainly looked like Pokey, but...now that Ness got a better look at him, he seemed entirely different. First of all, he was a different kind of chubby. The original Pokey was always strangely pale, and was flabby and bloated in a very unhealthy-looking way. This Pokey was well-tanned, and his physique was muscular and sturdy. He looked almost like a professional weight-lifter. And his expression wasn't anything like that nasty, dim-witted kid with his twisted personality. His smile was warm and pleasant, and his eyes shone bright.

“Just got...home?” Ness replied, haltingly. “Did you say you just got home? ...And from where?”

Hopefully not from the past... Not from beyond time...

And did he come back...with Giygas...?

Just then...

Woof, woof, woof-woof!

With a series of loud barks, that old dog King came flying in from another room. Panting happily with his tongue hanging out, he ran first to...Pokey?! He was jumping excitedly all over Pokey, the guy he had never been very fond of! And he was licking him all over his face, as if he were his favorite person, ever! Ness was stunned.

“Whoa, cut it out, calm down!” Pokey cried. Instead of running away, he hugged the rowdy King affectionately. “I don't care how long it's been, you're still too riled up, boy!”

“Well, well, welcome home, you two.”

“Welcome home, big bros!”

Ness's mother and Tracy had appeared. They were both wearing aprons, and something smelled wonderful. And no matter how he looked at them, they were still the same mother and little sister he had always known.

“Big...bros?” Ness repeated. Dumbfounded, he was knocked onto his backside by one of King's attacks. “Then...then, Pokey is...Pokey is my...my big brother?”

“Why are you so surprised by that all of a sudden?” his mother replied, as she knitted her pretty eyebrows. “Haven't you always been fond of your big brother and little sister?”

“I've been really bored, you know,” said Tracy, with a pout. “This vacation has been the worst! Papa and my big brothers never came back home, not even once!”

“I'm sorry, Tracy,” said Pokey, as he ruffled her hair. “There was a pretty intense course I wanted to take. But I still have plenty of time left in my summer break before I have to go back to college, so we're gonna do nothing but play from here on out!”

“Yaay! ❤” Tracy cried.

“Okay, okay...come in, come in!”

His mama, Tracy, and Pokey headed inside the house. Ness stood in the doorway, stunned, and all alone.

Huh? What? Wait a minute...he thought.

Pokey is part of my family...my big brother...and on top of that, he's already going to college?

Black, stormy clouds began to swell in the depths of Ness's heart. Lightning seemed to flicker and flash as he had a terrifying thought.

Is this just the beginning of new troubles? Is Giygas still inside that Pokey...hiding out...and just waiting for his chance to be born again...?

But just then...

Buzz-buzz-buzz-buzz, buzzzzzzz!

It was a little beetle...a rhinoceros beetle. ...No, it was a Scaraba! One of those bugs that were supposed to be extinct! It appeared out of nowhere and began to fly around Ness.

<Congratulations! And, thank you for everything, Ness!>

“Buzz Buzz!” Ness couldn't help but cry out, then he hurriedly lowered his voice. “You're alive, Buzz Buzz!”

<Thanks to you!> said Buzz Buzz, as he performed a skillful somersault. <This space-time phase was displaced just slightly, and history was repaired. The world that you all came from has been overlapped and absorbed by this world, where I did not die. And it's all thanks to the efforts of you and your three friends. Giygas...that awful monster, slunk back into some abyss in the many universes. The rift in time has been closed, and it will not open again for at least another thousand years.>

“Does that mean we did everything right?”

“But...then,” Ness began, and he suddenly became very sad. “That means that the Mr. Saturns never came to this planet. ...And Tessie and Mr. Cro, they never came here from the ancient world, either...”

<That's right,> Buzz Buzz replied, hovering right in front of Ness's nose. <But if you want to meet them again, then you will meet them again. You'll have to wait a while, though. Working together with his father, the young genius Dr. Jeff Andonuts will create a machine that can travel through time and space–while also being safer, more comfortable, and this time, compatible with the cells of living organisms. They'll complete it in...I'd say, about ten years.>

“Ten years?”

<That's right!> said Buzz Buzz. <In fact, that's how I was able to be here, right now! ...Whoops, oh no! Sorry, but I have a date tonight. And you must be exhausted from your long journey. Let's meet up again sometime, after things settle down a bit. Later, Ness! And give my regards to the others! Bye-bye!>

...With that, Buzz Buzz vanished. Ness never even had a chance to reply.

He stood there for quite some time, dazed. Then he suddenly got the feeling that a car had just pulled up in front of the house. As he turned to look, the door of a stylish silver sports car opened, and someone climbed out.

“Oh, Ness! Is that you?”

“Papa...!”

“Yup, I'm home!” his father replied. “Perfect timing, you can help me out.” The car's back seat was full of luggage, briefcases, and paper bags. It seemed as though he was returning home from a business trip. There was an unusually long package among the rest. Ness picked it up. “Oh, that one's for you.”

“For me?”

He opened it. ...It was a shiny new baseball bat! And with it was a bright red cap. At that moment, Ness suddenly realized that he had lost these precious items beyond the rift in time.

“Papa...thank you,” he said. “I'll take good care of them!”

“So you like them?” said his father. “That's great, I'm glad!”

“Eeek, I knew it! I thought I heard your voice!”

Everyone came running from inside the house.

“Welcome home, Papa!”

“Woof! A-woof, woof!”

“Well, I guess the gang's all here, then!”

“So, this one's for mama,” his father went on. “This here is for Tracy. King, I brought you a squeaky bone toy. And so this one...well, this one's for Pokey.”

“Thank you!” said Pokey. Smiling brightly, he opened his present. “Whoa, awesome! A carbon rod, right? I've been wanting one of these!”

It was a wonderful fishing rod. It was very stylish, and perfect for fly fishing in mountain streams.

Ness and Pokey glanced at one another.

“Should we go?” Pokey asked. “Just you and me?”

“...Uh...” Ness hesitated for a moment.

He wasn't sure if he liked the idea of Pokey being his big brother. What if this “big brother” bullied him and pushed him around? What if he made his “little brother” into his minion?

But... But...

Somehow, this Pokey and that Pokey seemed like two different people entirely. And this one was different for the better. Also...

What would it be like if Pokey weren't in this world at all? Ness thought. That would definitely be more painful for me. I'd feel like I failed him, like I wasn't able to help him, and I'd regret it for the rest of my life...

“What do you think? Do you want to go?” Pokey offered, again. So kindly...and so hopefully. In the gentle way of an understanding brother.

“...You mean...to our usual spot, right?” Ness asked cautiously, and he could already see it so clearly. That little brook. Their secret stream. The glistening sunshine. The infinitely clear and dazzling light of a summer's day. They were a little older now, but maybe they could begin everything over again and make things right, starting in a place to which he thought they would never return, and regaining the time he thought they'd lost forever...!

“'Course!” Pokey replied. He winked and gave Ness a thumbs-up. “And this time, we're definitely gonna catch him.”

“Let's go then,” said Ness, very emphatically. “Yeah, let's go right now, Pokey!”

They took each others' hands and they ran off, with King following close behind, barking excitedly and running in circles.

“Maamaaaa!” Tracy cried, in a shrill voice. “They're awful, those big bros of mine! ...They finally get back home, and then they run off again! It's not fair!”

“Looks like it,” their mother replied. “But your mama does think it would be nice to have a wonderful fish dinner on the menu for tonight.”

“Hey, why don't we all go and watch?” said their father. “Your papa's been wanting to see just how good you two are at angling for quite a while now.”

“Woof, woof!”

“Look at that, King wants to see it, too!”

“What should we do?” asked Ness, as he looked over at Pokey. “It's supposed to be our special, secret spot...”

“Maybe we should bring them along with us, just this once,” said Pokey. “They are family, after all.”

“Ahh...that's true,” said Ness. “I guess you're right...!”

He smiled.

“I'm finally home!”

Above them was a bright, sunny summer sky.

...And they knew that tomorrow would be a beautiful day, too!

END

Afterword

Hello there, it's been a while. This is Saori Kumi.

I am bringing you the MOTHER 2 novelization you have been waiting for.

Somehow, I made it before the deadline. I'm filled with powerful emotions.

When I think about it, it was around two very long years ago that I first heard rumors that MOTHER 2 was finally going to come out. I contacted Shinchosha in a flustered hurry.

“I want you to let me do it,” I said. “I want to do it no matter what it takes. Please don't let anyone else write it!”

At that point, Benimaru Itoh's manga was about to run in Shougaku Gonensei. What if this time they said, “We don't need a novelization. The manga is enough”? What if Mr. Itoi and everyone at APE didn't actually like the first novel very much?

I was on the verge of panic, and I very earnestly begged.

“Please, go ahead.”

As soon as I heard these words, I felt like I was in heaven (I'll explain why later).

If I'm remembering right, it was in March of '93 that I visited APE in Aoyama for the meeting. Ohh, it was no lie! The nostalgic world of MOTHER was all laid out (albeit still scattered in pieces here and there) before my very eyes. MOTHER 2 was in the process of being completed!

I was allowed to borrow Shigesato Itoi's handwritten story notes (well, a copy of them), documents on the ideal flow of the events and how they would relate to one another, and a video featuring an introduction of all the new towns and characters and things like that, while also being given the reassuring words, “Please write whatever you like.”

“Please let me test-play the ROM as soon as it's ready, won't you?” I said.

This would also mean I'd get to play MOTHER 2 before anyone else!

I was already very excited, and before too long a large parcel arrived from APE. I opened it up and, wow! It was a specially-made sukajan (a relatively light jacket, made of material with a sheen like satin). Completely covering the back of it, there was a huge MOTHER 2 logo with dragons embroidered on either side of it–my goodness, it was such a chic and very refined item! Upon wearing it, your Guts level would be raised immediately by 10 points.

But I lived in a quiet, rural town with a very small population. It would have been incredibly difficult to find someone who would know what MOTHER 2 was and would also know that it hadn't been released yet, and to have them see me wearing this item which made it look like I was one of the game's staff and think, “Whoa, it's finally coming out, I'm so happy!”

And so, I wasted no time in heading to Shinjuku, where I hung out at the Famicom sales counter in Yodobashi Camera. I pretended to be picking out games while very deliberately flaunting the back of my jacket to customers in every direction. I don't know who they were, but I was certain that a man who seemed to have a good deal of life experience, and an elementary school kid who seemed confident and well-behaved had both gone wide-eyed when they saw it, and so, satisfied, I headed home.

However...

After that, the ROM I needed so very badly still did not arrive...

One reason that I had been looking forward to MOTHER 2 was that, like many video game fans, I really loved the MOTHER world, itself.

Another reason was due to very personal circumstances.

Writing the previous MOTHER novel had a really, really great effect on me afterwards. Between the time before MOTHER and the time after MOTHER, the entire trajectory of Saori Kumi changed. Due to the so-called MOTHER Incident, you could say that I became almost an entirely different person altogether.

Firstly...

It allowed me to step onto a new stage–novels from Shinchosha (Shincho Bunko).

Until then, I had been working for a certain other company, and only writing books in a genre for young girls. Occaaasionally I did some work on the side, but only here and there, and only one-offs.

Speaking of Shincho Bunko, it is a massive line of books that are sure to be found even in the oldest, smallest, most inconspicuous bookstores in any rural village. When I was in middle and high school, I would stop in at the bookstore on my way home from class, and I would buy many dozens of books I wanted to read, and books it would be embarrassing if I hadn't read, from among Shincho Bunko's reprints and new editions, and I'd lose myself in them. “This is a genre that is likely to be picked up very naturally, by anyone who loves reading,” I thought. I am still extremely proud of becoming a writer who was able to contribute to it.

MOTHER took me from the realm of “Novels for Girls” to the realm of “Novels”.

Secondly...

It opened my eyes to the field of novelization.

Quite frankly, at first I was rather indignant about it.

“I am an author,” I would say. “Novels based on other works and things like that should be left to those who can't come up with good stories on their own. I don't want to wrestle using someone else's loincloth. I have my own originality, and plenty of things I want to write about.”

I was arrogant, and that's how I felt.

However...Mr. A of Shinchosha, who I was acquainted with through Sci-fi parties and things like that (he has since retired, but this was the esteemed Nozomu Omori, who is very famous for his translations, writings, and other nerdy works) somehow managed to persuade me.

“Of course, MOTHER is Shigesato Itoi's work,” he said. “If you were just to copy the original story, you may as well have Mr. Itoi himself, or someone else at APE who has been involved in the project for some time, write it for you. But Mr. Itoi says he doesn't want you to do that.”

Originally, MOTHER was created out of Mr. Itoi's love of RPGs. He would never trust it to an author who had never even touched a Famicom before. Also, a male writer might have a hard time reconciling their own personality with Mr. Itoi's. A woman would be able to add unique nuance to the novel, without killing the distinctive characteristics of the original work.

“That's why...Ms. Kumi, it has to be you!”

Say no more, I was convinced!

And that was how I got started doing this...

It was much harder than I had expected. But it was also terribly fun. It was a challenging job. And the resulting work was, sadly (?), better than anything else I had ever written (at least, I thought so).

“What if I'm only skilled enough to write novels based on other works...?”

I was just beginning to get depressed about this, when I got the call from Enix.

“We read MOTHER,” they said. “We enjoyed it very much. And so, we'd like to discuss something with you...”

They wanted to know if I could come up with a story for the journey of the young spirit Rubiss, and write it out. That was what they wanted to talk about.

In truth, even before this, I had been told by the director of a certain record company and by Meruhen Meka, the manga artist, that I should try to promote myself to Enix. Since I loved Dragon Quest so very, very much, I had been thinking about creating fan-works for it. That idea turned out to be a bit difficult and so I drifted away from it, but now...

...In a blaze of passion, I wrote Legend of the Great Spirit Rubiss, and then after that I wrote the novelizations of Dragon Quest IV and V.

Out of all the Famicom RPG World Bibliographers (?) out there, they chose none other than me. And to put it simply, it was all because I made that decision to write MOTHER.

Of all of the Famicom RPGs I have played, the Dragon Quest series and MOTHER are my favorites. There are many other famous ones, but I either haven't played them, or I got halfway through them, decided they weren't for me, and tossed them aside. I don't have any sort of attachment or passion for those, so I don't mind if someone else novelizes them. But once I've really fallen in love with an RPG, I won't let anyone else write for it. Absolutely not!

Yes. Now I can say this with pride.

This is my life's work! And...

I may not be a very significant author, but as a mercenary of Famicom RPG novelizations, I'm pretty good. I have amassed so much experience, HP and MP that I won't lose to anyone. My weapons and items have been carefully selected and arranged. I have pride and confidence in this!!

Because of feelings like these, when MOTHER 2 came out, I felt I had to give something back to this work that was such a huge turning point in my life, and which had caused me to become more familiar with the genre–and, I did not want to give up the prestigious position I had as the official MOTHER Novelizer.

And, the third effect...

It enabled me to reach into the realm of fantasy.

When I was a child, my favorite stories were about swords and magic, monsters and ghosts, princes, witches, dragons, and talking animals. I've always admired and envied them. But I didn't think I could write them, myself. You have to have extensive knowledge of legends and folklore, history, religion, different nations, and the cultures and customs of the world, and to understand them through proper research and analysis, along with having a detailed comprehension of human psychology. Naturally, I believed that if one had not read through all the masterpieces of fantasy, old and new, and did not have a masterful command of beautiful and eloquent composition, then they could not write such a story. I felt that fantasy was a priceless and mystical jewel that should never be touched by poor, dirty hands.

But...the world I was supposed to novelize was very much a fantasy. I went all in, and when I began to write, I found that it was fun. I was totally absorbed in it. I got all fired up.

And so, after realizing I had been immature, shameful, and rude, I gave it my best shot. I'm still not at a level that satisfies me in the depths of my heart, but I want to keep practicing and steadily getting better at it. Please keep an open mind as you watch over my progress.

Incidentally, just as I was very busily writing the third volume of Thornton Cycle, which is also part of the Shincho Bunko line, the ROM for MOTHER 2 arrived. I wanted to write the book for MOTHER 2 first, so the other one had to get pushed to the back of the line (“I have commitments with another company, so I can't finish this one right away, sorry!”). I appreciated their patience.

All in all...

I had been waiting for this for a little over a year.

Finally, I would be experiencing this new game in the MOTHER series, which I owed such a debt to.

Ohh, I was so happy!

As I'm sure you know, sequels to popular works are not often as interesting as part “1”. There are many things that are difficult when trying to maintain the essence that everyone loved from “1” while also adding something new. Where “1” is usually a person's earnest attempt to create something that is a condensation of their best ideas and all their power, “2” quite often becomes a hollow, wishy-washy imitation of “1”.

But MOTHER 2 was different!

It was fun, it was cute, it was suspenseful, and it was thrilling. There were so many things that caught me off guard.

Among it all, I fell the most in love with the “Mr. Saturns”, which caused a lot of extra trouble for Shinchosha. It's not quite fair to use visuals in a novelization, but I really wanted to have that “Mr. Saturn Font”. I mean, you out there, you would all really prefer to read what the Mr. Saturns have to say in their special font, wouldn't you? Right?

One thing about the gameplay that really left an impression on me was the variation in enemy behaviors depending on your level differences.

In a certain cave, when I first encountered the “Mighty Bears”, I was nervous and afraid–Eek, please don't come near me!–but then, when I came back later, they scattered and ran like baby spiders. I'll never forget the sight of them, as the poor things hit dead-ends and wiggled their butts with their backs to me. Of course, the first thing I did was attack them. Because above all else, this was a good chance to earn EXP. I hunted them down, cornered them, and made sure to beat them up thoroughly. But after two, or maybe three, I looked at their adorable, squirming backsides, and I felt a pang in my heart.

“I'm a warrior, out to protect this world, aren't I?” I thought. “I mustn't do things like bully these weak creatures!”

And so, of course, I was able to progress through MOTHER 2 without needing to hunt down enemies that were afraid of me and torture them to death (or in other words, without having to forcibly level myself up). I was able to save the earth!

I love the ambiance of this world.

I think the most important point of an RPG is that the player is able to go on an adventure in an unfamiliar world, while putting themselves in the place of the main character. A game which intends to have too much dramatic production, which makes the player think, “I'd rather die than have this happen to me”...that is not an RPG. Such a story is better suited for a novel, or a manga, or a movie, and not a game, don't you think?

Ah, but now, I had to actually take a story that was interesting to play through as a game, and bring it into the realm of novels, which has entirely different rules.

Parts of the story which are interesting on a game screen, but not necessarily in a novel (for example, battle scenes), needed to be shortened and simplified as much as possible. And instead, the characters needed to be expanded upon. Among them, some characters may have ended up being very different from how you all pictured them as you played through the game. I apologize if it felt out of place.

As an example, in the previous game, there was Lloyd (who I love ❤) and in the current game, there is Jeff (who I also love ❤), and these two are very similar in looks and in personality. But I had written so much about Lloyd, during Lloyd's time, that I thought it would be boring to write about someone who was basically the same kid. And so, Jeff ended up becoming a boy with some unique characteristics (which I won't write about here in detail, in case someone out there is starting this book by reading the afterword) that you probably weren't expecting. But, now I am very happy with this sudden idea I had for him. I hope that through their love for this version of Jeff, young readers will be able to have compassion for others in circumstances like his.

From the bottom of my heart, I would like to express my sincere gratitude to the very generous Shigesato Itoi and his staff for granting me permission to novelize their wonderful original work and for leaving everything to my discretion. If there is ever another one, please let me work together with you all again!

And to Kyoko Sakurai, of Shincho Bunko's editorial department. We burned brightly together. Thanks to your keen insight and tireless encouragement, the work was always enjoyable. Thank you so much. Let's go eat delicious things again sometime!

And to the one who supported me during times when I was manic, and times when I was depressed, my husband Yo Hatano (ah, incidentally, this is the boyfriend who was mentioned in the afterword of the first book, the one who had never really played a video game), who also checked over the completed manuscript very carefully. I really depend on you. I hope I can continue to, even in the future.

And finally...

To all the readers who enjoyed the original MOTHER novel, and who sent me letters. To everyone who said, as soon as we found out there would be a “2”, “Will you be writing one again this time? I'll definitely read it, so do your best and write something interesting, as soon as you can!” Thank you so very, very much. First and foremost, this book is for all of you.

I pray that it will not disappoint.

November 1994

Saori Kumi

Edit/Censor/Localization Log

Chapter 1

-Localized-

"Although he still had such a majestic name as “King”...”

-Original-

“Chibi's name may have been “Chibi”, but...”

(“Chibi” means small and compact)

Chapter 2

-Localized-

“They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks, and Trixie was the name of a famous circus dog back in the old days…...Wait, what the heck?”

-Original/Literal-

“Even if a young boy has ambition, it can be hard to study, and Gaku was a famous canoeing dog......what the heck?”

This is a pun based on 学 (Gaku - “study”) and ガク (Gaku – A real dog who was famous for riding in canoes). The first part is a reference to a Japanese adage that, luckily, is roughly equivalent to the phrase “You can't teach an old dog new tricks”, and Trixie does happen to be a real dog who once performed with the Ringling Brothers circus.

-Localized-

“The thing raised one of its hands and flashed a rude gesture...”

The original gesture is referred to as a “F*ck You” sign.

-Just a note!-

“Isn't this your favorite hat, the one you got signed by Mister?”

“Mister” is the nickname for famous Japanese baseball player, Shigeo Nagashima.

-Localized-

“...said Mayor B.H. Pirkle, as he stood up and offered to shake Ness's hand.”

The original line had a part describing Pirkle as having a shiny head “as his name would suggest”, which I think is a reference to the “pika” in his name (Pikaaru), but I couldn't figure out what to do with this, so I just took it out.

-Localized-

“You're the town's trash—I mean treasure.”

There was a brilliant pun here involving “hokori” 埃 (dust/dirt) and “hokori” 誇り (pride).

Chapter 3

-Localized-

“...sprawling field of bluegrass. Which in this case, means grass that is literally blue.”

This was originally a joke based on the word “青々”, which is almost always understood to mean the color green, even though the Kanji reads “blue”.

-Localized-

“Nice to meet you, I'm the boss of Burglin Park, Al Everdred.”

The author gave Everdred a first name here, “Gacchiri” (“Clever”). Luckily for me, the English player's guide for Earthbound just happened to give Everdred a first name, too.

-Note-

“...A long time ago, there was a man who was very happy to let us all know that the world was blue.”

This appears to be a reference to Yuri Gagarin who was the first to confirm that the earth is blue (when seen from space).

-Localized-

“...I've had my driver's license suspended for give or take thirty years now, so I wouldn't know a steering wheel from a Bering seal...”

Original joke was “Handoru” (steering wheel) and “Kondoru” (condor).

-Localized-

“They received a warm welcome from all five Runaways.”

The original called them the five “Brothers”.

Chapter 4

-Note-

...but it was all too familiar to Jeff, who would always self-deprecatingly compare himself to Frankenstein.

It has been pointed out that of course, Jeff means “Frankenstein's monster”. I'm begging you not to email me about this. 😂

Chapter 5

-Localized-

🎵If the one in Loch Ness is Nessie,

🎵And the one in Lake Tess is Tessie,

🎵And the one in Chesapeake Bay is Chessie,

🎵Why is the one in Lake Erie Bessie?

-Original-

🎵If the one in JUSCO is Jussie,

🎵Then the one in Pasco must be Passie

(The last two lines were names of companies in Japan, but I couldn't figure out how to run with that, so I just continued the Lake Monster theme)

-Localized-

🎵A bear is only a bear,

🎵An elk is just an elk, but I'm Belch!

-Original-

🎵A bear is just a bear,

🎵A Pooh is only a Pooh, but I'm Geppu!

Chapter 7

-Omission-

“I like you better.” The man in the flip-flops suddenly leaned forward, wrapped his arms around Ness' shoulders, and blew a hot breath into his ear. With the palm of his hand, which was strangely damp, he caressed Ness's elbow, his ribs, and the bit of his thigh sticking out from under his shorts. “I think you're far more beautiful than someone like him, darling.”

-Censored-

“You must have been so scared, being approached by a creep like that.”

“A creep?” said Ness, blinking his eyes in shock. “...That guy...?”

The original word used was “homo”.

Chapter 8

-Localized-

...and he looked like a pile of uncooked biscuits.

The original comparison was a cairn made of mochi, but since both of those words aren't too well known in English, I went with something visually similar.

-Localized-

...“Something is afoot.”

“Jeff, don't say it,” said Ness.

“Don't say what?” Jeff asked.

“You know, the old '...and this is a hand!' gag,” Ness replied.

The original pun had to do with the word “殺気” (bloodlust/an evil presence), which can be heard as “さっき” (a moment ago). I hate this one and I'm sorry – I'd take suggestions on how to improve it. 💫

-Localized-

“If you extinguish all thoughts from your mind...even flames will feel cool...cool as so many cucumbers,”

The original was a pun involving a proverb, and a play on the words “cool” and “Suzu City Hall”. I didn't really know what to do with this one.

-Localized-

“That's most likely a Wetnosaurus Paullumpopularis!”

In the Japanese version, the wetnosaur was given an extended name which seemed to mean something like “somewhat popular”, so I did my best to turn that into Latin.

-Localized-

It was as if they were psyching each other up and urging each other on.

The Japanese version was a reference to a Lipovitan (energy drink) ad campaign.

Chapter 9

-Censored-

He saw a nostalgic vision of his mother's face smiling mischievously, still so beautiful and sassy, even for her age.

The original novel used the word “sexy” where I used “sassy”. I didn't feel comfortable using that word here.

-Localized-

“The realm of the dead...they're overwhelmed with dread...”

The original text was a pun on the word for realm of the dead (幽冥界/yuumeikai) and a phrase like, “Aren't you famous?” (有名、かい？/yuumei, kai?).

-Localized-

“...that sigh, or shy, or spy, or whatever you call it...those weird powers you have...”

The original pun was a play on the word for rhino (“sai”), and off-railed into a list of funny-sounding animals, and I'm sad this one lost so much, but we really have no word in English that works the way I needed it to. (Suggestions welcome!)

-Localized-

“Mister Ness, no bruise, no lose.”

“Pray for win, from within!”

The original first line was a pun on Gunma prefecture, and the second line was a slight pun/rhyme involving the word “Christmas”. I found out later (by playing Mother 3 in English) that “Gunmaken” is localized as “Dakota”, but I couldn't make that rhyme, so I'm leaving it as is for now!

SPECIAL THANKS!

In Loving Memory

-MUNCHIE-

Translation Supervisor, Friend, Mouse